Received Wednesday, March 12, 2008-Perspective & Opinion
Hey all,
I am a nanny who has a question. I just started with a new family at the beginning of January. The little boy is 4, and sweet as can be. My boss is a single mother who works extremely hard. It is obvious that her son is her world and is loved very much by her. I am a mid 20's college student, and so am part time (average 25 hours a week) after school.
The problem is, I can't for the life of me, get this kid away from the television. I have cared for two other families very long term in the past and neither allowed much TV in the home.
As a single mom who works very hard, it makes sense to me that she would have turned to the TV more often than she would have liked.
For the past 2.5 months I have been trying very hard to get my kid away from the television without a fuss. There's NOTHING he wants more than to watch TV.
We've gone to the dinosaur and art museums, had play dates with other kids, gone to the park, coffee shops, bakeries, movies, mall, played outside, etc.
I pride myself on being a good, creative nanny, who turns everything into a fun learning experience for the child, but it has been exceedingly difficult this time around.
He finds a lot of comfort in the TV as he is very attached to his mother... It's a way, in his mind, for him to stop missing mom.
I feel like I would really be doing him a disservice by giving into his TV habit, so have tried to set guidelines. The current rule is, after school, TV is off for half an hour, then may be turned on until dinner, off at dinner and on again when mom comes home if she chooses to allow it.
This still allows at least an hour and a half of TV time while in my care, which I absolutely don't like.
Any ideas of shortening the time even more? I want to foster his love for books, which he hasn't found yet, as well as words, art and letters, which are also relatively lost on him.
His mom is all for my less-TV approach, also. The kid, however is NOT.
I've thought about removing him from the house even MORE, and maybe spending even more time in book stores and libraries....but at such a young age, I see the importance of being at home. He's in school full time, 5 days a week, and day care for an hour after until I pick him up.
Ideas?
Wednesday
Tuesday
Gift Idea for High School Sitter...
Tuesday, March 11, 2008-Perspective & Opinion
Hello All, our wonderful nanny will be graduating from high school at the beginning of May, and both DH and I are at a loss as to what to get her to celebrate! She will be going to RISD in the fall, but mom and dad are taking care of all the dorm stuff. Both dc's plan on making her a scrapbook and some clay figurines (to decorate her dorm windowsill =)), but dh and I would, obviously, love to get her something too. We have two boys, 7 and 10, so we aren't exactly well-versed in teenage girl! Any help is greatly appreciated.
Hello All, our wonderful nanny will be graduating from high school at the beginning of May, and both DH and I are at a loss as to what to get her to celebrate! She will be going to RISD in the fall, but mom and dad are taking care of all the dorm stuff. Both dc's plan on making her a scrapbook and some clay figurines (to decorate her dorm windowsill =)), but dh and I would, obviously, love to get her something too. We have two boys, 7 and 10, so we aren't exactly well-versed in teenage girl! Any help is greatly appreciated.
Third Street Playground in Brooklyn, NY
Received Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Overwhelmed Nanny Sighting
Third Street Playground, Prospect Park, Brooklyn, Tuesday, March 11th. in the afternoon.
Description of child: Absolutely gorgeous 4 year old girl named either Sophie or Sophia with long, wavy, black hair
Description of nanny: Slim African American named Nicole or Nadine (or something similar that starts with an N)
The situation: Your daughter was pushing younger kids around (she pushed my son down, which is why I noticed her). She threw sand and toys at kids and adults in the sandbox. She scratched your nanny when she tried to intervene. She barked orders at your nanny for her to push her in the swing or bring her a snack.
Your nanny is engaged and seems to be working very hard, but she's chasing your child all over the playground and the child just doesn't listen to her (or anyone--other caregivers tried to step in to help).
I don't want to get this nanny in trouble because, as I said, she's working very hard, but your daughter seems pretty out of control.
Overwhelmed Nanny SightingThird Street Playground, Prospect Park, Brooklyn, Tuesday, March 11th. in the afternoon.
Description of child: Absolutely gorgeous 4 year old girl named either Sophie or Sophia with long, wavy, black hair
Description of nanny: Slim African American named Nicole or Nadine (or something similar that starts with an N)
The situation: Your daughter was pushing younger kids around (she pushed my son down, which is why I noticed her). She threw sand and toys at kids and adults in the sandbox. She scratched your nanny when she tried to intervene. She barked orders at your nanny for her to push her in the swing or bring her a snack.
Your nanny is engaged and seems to be working very hard, but she's chasing your child all over the playground and the child just doesn't listen to her (or anyone--other caregivers tried to step in to help).
I don't want to get this nanny in trouble because, as I said, she's working very hard, but your daughter seems pretty out of control.
Bathroom at the Children's Zoo in Central Park (NYC)
Received Tuesday, March 11, 2008
I am so angry! I was at the Children's Zoo this morning. I witnessed a Hispanic nanny with medium skin, dark lipstick, reddish brown hair and she was holding her charge naked from the waste down over the sink, running water on the child's bottom to get what looked like diarrhea off the child. In the sink! The sink where children was their hands. I can't bare to describe to you what was coming out of/off of that child in to that sink. It was stomach turning. I am not going to tell you what I said because I totally lost my cool, and in front of my child. This woman is a nanny. The child was wearing a pair of tan corduroy overalls with a pastel purple shirt. She had curly hair just below her ears, was Caucasian, with rosy cheeks and and a mouth full of teeth. I would guess the child to be 16-18 months old. The nanny had a mint green carry all bag with silver accents on it and the nanny was wearing black boots with her pants tucked in to them. The boots were leather looking with divots on them.
I am so angry! I was at the Children's Zoo this morning. I witnessed a Hispanic nanny with medium skin, dark lipstick, reddish brown hair and she was holding her charge naked from the waste down over the sink, running water on the child's bottom to get what looked like diarrhea off the child. In the sink! The sink where children was their hands. I can't bare to describe to you what was coming out of/off of that child in to that sink. It was stomach turning. I am not going to tell you what I said because I totally lost my cool, and in front of my child. This woman is a nanny. The child was wearing a pair of tan corduroy overalls with a pastel purple shirt. She had curly hair just below her ears, was Caucasian, with rosy cheeks and and a mouth full of teeth. I would guess the child to be 16-18 months old. The nanny had a mint green carry all bag with silver accents on it and the nanny was wearing black boots with her pants tucked in to them. The boots were leather looking with divots on them.
Techny Prairie Park in Northbrook, Il.
Received Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Physical description of caregiver: Fat. Sloppy looking. White. Stringy hair. Did I say fat? Brown hair. Loose. Suede jacket, jeans.
Physical description of involved child/children: 2 boys. Both White. Probably brothers. One boy had brown hair cut very short, brown eyes and wore a striped red and grey shirt, the older boy had blond hair and lighter eyes, with the same short hair cut and was wearing a grey and blue striped shirt. Both boys had on naby blue jackets. Identical.
Address or venue of observed incident: Techny Prairie Park in Northbrook, Il. walking by the river.
Date and time of incident: 2:20 PM, Tues 3/11
Detailed description of what you witnessed: Nanny was walking behind dark grey and black stroller with chrome bits. The blond boy was behind her imploring her to give the child in the stroller back his 'nappy'. The boy in the stroller was crying. The nanny was holding the 'nappy' with one hand on the handle as she pushed. The older boy was sooo sweet. He was saying to the nanny, 'but you can't take his nappy away, not that. that's his 'curity'. The nanny then said something I couldn't hear, but she bent down and grabbed the older child's arm. He looked stunned. She walks over to a garbage can and holds the 'nappy' in front of the can. The baby is crying and the older boy is begging her, 'please don't do that'.
Background: I have no background. I don't know what the child in the stroller had done or why he was being punished. Given that he looked to be about 2 years old, I can't imagine it was that bad. I also think there was a better way this horrible nanny could have dealt with it but she seemed to be getting joy out of terrorizing not just the younger boy in the stroller but the older brother who was diligently trying to stick up for his little brother. I stopped in my tracks and looked at her very sternly. The nanny looked at me and said, "Next time Bobo (sounded like bo bo) you need to listen to me". She walked back to the stroller and handed him his 'nappy'. What they referred to as a nappy was a silky looking blue blanket that was furry/textured on the opposite side. One side silk and blue, the other textured and cream colored. It was not a large blanket tho, maybe 20 x 20.
Description of vehicle, bag, stroller that may aid in identifying involved caregiver: Black stroller reminded me of a rental stroller. Very basic stroller. Dark grey or black. Chrome parts.
Physical description of caregiver: Fat. Sloppy looking. White. Stringy hair. Did I say fat? Brown hair. Loose. Suede jacket, jeans.Physical description of involved child/children: 2 boys. Both White. Probably brothers. One boy had brown hair cut very short, brown eyes and wore a striped red and grey shirt, the older boy had blond hair and lighter eyes, with the same short hair cut and was wearing a grey and blue striped shirt. Both boys had on naby blue jackets. Identical.
Address or venue of observed incident: Techny Prairie Park in Northbrook, Il. walking by the river.
Date and time of incident: 2:20 PM, Tues 3/11
Detailed description of what you witnessed: Nanny was walking behind dark grey and black stroller with chrome bits. The blond boy was behind her imploring her to give the child in the stroller back his 'nappy'. The boy in the stroller was crying. The nanny was holding the 'nappy' with one hand on the handle as she pushed. The older boy was sooo sweet. He was saying to the nanny, 'but you can't take his nappy away, not that. that's his 'curity'. The nanny then said something I couldn't hear, but she bent down and grabbed the older child's arm. He looked stunned. She walks over to a garbage can and holds the 'nappy' in front of the can. The baby is crying and the older boy is begging her, 'please don't do that'.
Background: I have no background. I don't know what the child in the stroller had done or why he was being punished. Given that he looked to be about 2 years old, I can't imagine it was that bad. I also think there was a better way this horrible nanny could have dealt with it but she seemed to be getting joy out of terrorizing not just the younger boy in the stroller but the older brother who was diligently trying to stick up for his little brother. I stopped in my tracks and looked at her very sternly. The nanny looked at me and said, "Next time Bobo (sounded like bo bo) you need to listen to me". She walked back to the stroller and handed him his 'nappy'. What they referred to as a nappy was a silky looking blue blanket that was furry/textured on the opposite side. One side silk and blue, the other textured and cream colored. It was not a large blanket tho, maybe 20 x 20.
Description of vehicle, bag, stroller that may aid in identifying involved caregiver: Black stroller reminded me of a rental stroller. Very basic stroller. Dark grey or black. Chrome parts.
Conflicting Feelings About the New Nanny
Tuesday, March 11, 2008-Perspective & Opinion
We hired a nanny who had previous experience working as a nursing assistant in a hospital. She has many fine attributes. She charts our dc's activities throughout the day, including what dcs ate, drank, minutes of television watched, if dc had a bm and the size and consistency of the bm. She's that thorough. As working parents, we appreciate that detail. On the negative side, she lets dc eat in other rooms beside the kitchen, shows up late and has already been out sick twice. My husband suggested that we put the nanny on probation. His plan is to go over our rules again, put everything in writing and put her on probation for a month. I was curious to see if there are other families that have utilized this probation plan of action. The nanny is a live-in and because two of the days she called out were Mondays, my husband plans to state that the nanny needs to return home Sunday evenings. She has family in Brooklyn and her previous call outs just seemed like long weekends away to us. To reiterate, she has many fine points.
We hired a nanny who had previous experience working as a nursing assistant in a hospital. She has many fine attributes. She charts our dc's activities throughout the day, including what dcs ate, drank, minutes of television watched, if dc had a bm and the size and consistency of the bm. She's that thorough. As working parents, we appreciate that detail. On the negative side, she lets dc eat in other rooms beside the kitchen, shows up late and has already been out sick twice. My husband suggested that we put the nanny on probation. His plan is to go over our rules again, put everything in writing and put her on probation for a month. I was curious to see if there are other families that have utilized this probation plan of action. The nanny is a live-in and because two of the days she called out were Mondays, my husband plans to state that the nanny needs to return home Sunday evenings. She has family in Brooklyn and her previous call outs just seemed like long weekends away to us. To reiterate, she has many fine points.
Monday
The Nanny Affair (on Dr. Phil)
Received Monday, March 10, 2008
Hi Jane,
It's after nine and there is no such nanny stuff on the blog, so I wanted to suggest you post this. It's not brand new, but some people might enjoy it. -Heidi
Dr. Phil meets Brandon, a fireman who cheated on his wife, Amy, with their teenage nanny.
Hi Jane,
It's after nine and there is no such nanny stuff on the blog, so I wanted to suggest you post this. It's not brand new, but some people might enjoy it. -Heidi
Dr. Phil meets Brandon, a fireman who cheated on his wife, Amy, with their teenage nanny.
Sunday
Madison Square Park Playground in NYC
Received Sunday, March 9, 2008
Good Nanny Sighting:
Physical description of caregiver: White girl, dark hair and light eyes, no audible accent, pretty, maybe 25 years old
Physical description of involved child/children: girl around 4 years old wearing a brown jacket with multi colored flowers on it, kind of a retro design (maybe named Olive?), and a dark haired boy about 2 who was wearing an orange puffy jacket (maybe named Jasper?)
Address or venue of observed incident: Madison Square Park playground
Date and time of incident: Sunday, March 9, about 4:30 pm
Detailed description of what you witnessed: No specific incident, I just watched the nanny interacting with the children in a very nice way. I chatted with her briefly (she told me she’s the nanny, not the mom), and she said there’s a one year old little sister also. At one point the little boy was playing with my 16 month old, and the nanny watched from a short distance away and made sure the boy (bigger than mine) was playing nicely - which he was. And shortly after that the 4 year old girl came up and started leaning/resting on the nanny, who asked her if she was tired and rubbed her hair nicely. Like I said, nothing specific, but I have a nanny who I love and I see lots of nannies both good and bad, and I got a good vibe from how this one acted with the kids. Just thought the parents would want to know.
Good Nanny Sighting:Physical description of caregiver: White girl, dark hair and light eyes, no audible accent, pretty, maybe 25 years old
Physical description of involved child/children: girl around 4 years old wearing a brown jacket with multi colored flowers on it, kind of a retro design (maybe named Olive?), and a dark haired boy about 2 who was wearing an orange puffy jacket (maybe named Jasper?)
Address or venue of observed incident: Madison Square Park playground
Date and time of incident: Sunday, March 9, about 4:30 pm
Detailed description of what you witnessed: No specific incident, I just watched the nanny interacting with the children in a very nice way. I chatted with her briefly (she told me she’s the nanny, not the mom), and she said there’s a one year old little sister also. At one point the little boy was playing with my 16 month old, and the nanny watched from a short distance away and made sure the boy (bigger than mine) was playing nicely - which he was. And shortly after that the 4 year old girl came up and started leaning/resting on the nanny, who asked her if she was tired and rubbed her hair nicely. Like I said, nothing specific, but I have a nanny who I love and I see lots of nannies both good and bad, and I got a good vibe from how this one acted with the kids. Just thought the parents would want to know.
References on a Potential Employer?
Received Sunday, March 9, 2008-Perspective & Opinion
Can I, the nanny, request past-nanny references from potential employers?I am the fourth nanny in my five-year old charge's life. Because of the mother, I have grown to hate my job so much that I have anxiety dreams that wake me up screaming. Had I known what a terrible person and bad mother she is, I never would have accepted this job. Too late, I surreptitiously spoke to the other three previous nannies and learned we all share the same horror stories and not surprisingly, they all quit because of the mistreatment they received by our employer. Hindsight is 20/20! I don't want this to happen to me again when I hunt for my next nannying job. What is the protocol for asking parents for their references? It seems that if nannies must provide references, parents should too. Thank you in advance for any advice.
Can I, the nanny, request past-nanny references from potential employers?I am the fourth nanny in my five-year old charge's life. Because of the mother, I have grown to hate my job so much that I have anxiety dreams that wake me up screaming. Had I known what a terrible person and bad mother she is, I never would have accepted this job. Too late, I surreptitiously spoke to the other three previous nannies and learned we all share the same horror stories and not surprisingly, they all quit because of the mistreatment they received by our employer. Hindsight is 20/20! I don't want this to happen to me again when I hunt for my next nannying job. What is the protocol for asking parents for their references? It seems that if nannies must provide references, parents should too. Thank you in advance for any advice.
Friday
Nanny Injured on the Job...
Received Friday, March 7, 2008-Perspective & Opinion
I'm a nanny who was injured on the job (took a tumble in employer's home). I think I'm OK, but was maybe more injured by my employer's reaction (NON-reaction) after the fact...she pretty much ignored the incident, and didn't even ask (when I came to work the day after) if I was alright, or feeling OK.
I'd like to hear from other nannies how they've handled (been treated) getting hurt on the job. In my state, domestic employees are not covered by workers compensation. I wonder what would have happened had this been a more serious injury, and my ability to do my job, or return to work for a time had been affected. Thanks for any guidance you can offer.
I'm a nanny who was injured on the job (took a tumble in employer's home). I think I'm OK, but was maybe more injured by my employer's reaction (NON-reaction) after the fact...she pretty much ignored the incident, and didn't even ask (when I came to work the day after) if I was alright, or feeling OK.
I'd like to hear from other nannies how they've handled (been treated) getting hurt on the job. In my state, domestic employees are not covered by workers compensation. I wonder what would have happened had this been a more serious injury, and my ability to do my job, or return to work for a time had been affected. Thanks for any guidance you can offer.
Thursday
Mission Viejo Mall in Mission Viejo, CA
Thursday, March 6, 2008I was at the mall in Mission Viejo yesterday,(3/5) {The Shops at Mission Viejo} when I witnessed a frantic woman shopping near me. I can't detail everything that made me suspicious but will tell you she had no patience, was very jittery and while she was waiting for the elevator, the baby began crying and she began shaking the stroller. Shaking the stroller so that it went up on two wheels and rocked back on the other and repeatedly. She saw me look at her and she said, "whatever it takes, right- it soothes her". And the truth is, the baby did stop crying but I wouldn't want my child bounced around like that. The child was at my best estimation, under four months of age. I am not 100 percent sure she was a nanny, but based on her simple attire, (including Levis jeans and a plaid shirt over a tank top), I have a pretty good feeling she was. If you have a baby who left the house yesterday wearing a pink sailor styled dress and your baby rides around in a blue and cream colored Everbright stroller, you need to take a minute to talk about the person who was caring for her yesterday. Even if you are the father and she is the mother. The woman was carrying a square brown leather purse with embroider on one side. She was rifling through it looking for something and spilled the contents of her bag outside Saks. When she reached over to pick it up, she threw the stuff back in the baby stroller, not her bag. I saw her again at the food court and had left the stroller propped by a table while she was ordering. She seemed very disconnected, maybe even mentally ill. I am sorry to report that something is very off, I got a very bad vibe.
Tired & Frustrated Parents Turn to Spanking..
Received Thursday, March 6, 2008- Perspective & Opinion
I need advice!
I am a nanny for twin almost 3 year old girls. They have been potty training for almost a year now, and have been doing great. Unfortunately for the potty training, the parents decided to have another baby, and due to complications the mom was in the hospital for almost a month. The baby is home now and the girls are adjusting, except with potty training. They FREAK-OUT everytime I suggest using the potty now where as before they would either say no or go sit down. I come to find out this week that the parents have been spanking the girls everytime the have an accident for the past week and I am assuming this is why they are freaking out.
My question is, how do I confront the parents about this? Or, do I even confront them?
I am a Child Development major and have been a nanny 7 years and KNOW this is unhealthy and will ultimately prolong the process. I believe the only reason they are spanking them is because they are tired and frustrated, and this isn't likely to change for a while, because of the new baby. I talked to the dad and grandparents before the baby was born about regression in potty training, and how it's very common and something to keep in mind, but it seems they haven't.
I am clueless on what to do.....
Can you please give me advice?
I need advice!
I am a nanny for twin almost 3 year old girls. They have been potty training for almost a year now, and have been doing great. Unfortunately for the potty training, the parents decided to have another baby, and due to complications the mom was in the hospital for almost a month. The baby is home now and the girls are adjusting, except with potty training. They FREAK-OUT everytime I suggest using the potty now where as before they would either say no or go sit down. I come to find out this week that the parents have been spanking the girls everytime the have an accident for the past week and I am assuming this is why they are freaking out.
My question is, how do I confront the parents about this? Or, do I even confront them?
I am a Child Development major and have been a nanny 7 years and KNOW this is unhealthy and will ultimately prolong the process. I believe the only reason they are spanking them is because they are tired and frustrated, and this isn't likely to change for a while, because of the new baby. I talked to the dad and grandparents before the baby was born about regression in potty training, and how it's very common and something to keep in mind, but it seems they haven't.
I am clueless on what to do.....
Can you please give me advice?
Inappropriate Behavior of Mom's Coworker...
Received Thursday, March 6, 2008- Perspective & Opinion
I am a nanny for a wonder family. The mother comes home for lunch every day. Once a week her [male] co-worker comes with her because I watch his daughter, too, on that day. A few weeks ago, during lunch, he made a crude comment about women's yeast infections. Today he made a crude joke about "teabagging". I let it slide both times, but I think it is inappropriate behavior on his part and I want to deal with it. My charge's mother, in both cases, did make the comment of "Classy..." in a disapproving tone, so I know she didn't appreciate it either. Any ideas on the best way to handle this? I don't want to alienate the mother or put her in the middle, because she and I have a good relationship, but I only see this guy briefly once a week and she works with him every day. Any advice would be appreciated.
I am a nanny for a wonder family. The mother comes home for lunch every day. Once a week her [male] co-worker comes with her because I watch his daughter, too, on that day. A few weeks ago, during lunch, he made a crude comment about women's yeast infections. Today he made a crude joke about "teabagging". I let it slide both times, but I think it is inappropriate behavior on his part and I want to deal with it. My charge's mother, in both cases, did make the comment of "Classy..." in a disapproving tone, so I know she didn't appreciate it either. Any ideas on the best way to handle this? I don't want to alienate the mother or put her in the middle, because she and I have a good relationship, but I only see this guy briefly once a week and she works with him every day. Any advice would be appreciated.
Wednesday
Did you tune in? Your thoughts?
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Follow Ups:
Real Housewives of New York City as Fake as Their Flaunted Assets...
...The five so-called socialites who star on this program are loud, gawky, and likely on the periphery of the social scene, as the upper echelon of the city would never agree to be on reality television.
'The Real Housewives of New York City'
...With a blithe lack of awareness that is almost endearing, each woman introduces herself as a member of New York's society elite and then proceeds to behave in a way that defies every definition of "elite" and "New York society."
Comparing Apples to Oranges
...Whereas it's easy to buy the Orange County chicks as the queen bees of California's Coto, the New York City housewives have a much bigger pond to rule—and rule they do not.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Real Housewives of New York City premier on Bravo March 4 at 11 PM
and thereafter, Tuesday evenings at 10 PM EST on Bravo
Follow Ups:
Real Housewives of New York City as Fake as Their Flaunted Assets...
...The five so-called socialites who star on this program are loud, gawky, and likely on the periphery of the social scene, as the upper echelon of the city would never agree to be on reality television.
'The Real Housewives of New York City'
...With a blithe lack of awareness that is almost endearing, each woman introduces herself as a member of New York's society elite and then proceeds to behave in a way that defies every definition of "elite" and "New York society."
Comparing Apples to Oranges
...Whereas it's easy to buy the Orange County chicks as the queen bees of California's Coto, the New York City housewives have a much bigger pond to rule—and rule they do not.
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Real Housewives of New York City premier on Bravo March 4 at 11 PM
and thereafter, Tuesday evenings at 10 PM EST on Bravo
Russell Pederson Playground in Bay Ridge, NY
Received Wednesday, March 5, 2008Spot: Russell Pederson Playground-Bay Ridge-Brooklyn
Time: 2:20-2:40 PM, today. (3/5)
Nanny: A Jamaican accented woman, with dark skin, with a long denim skirt, over weight, wearing a short sleeved pastel purple top. Hair was short and wavy.
Child: A boy with curly brown hair, olive skin, a striped shirt. blues & white. Blue jeans. green windbreaker.
What: Nanny was drinking a Carvel beverage out of a Carvel cup. The child had Carvel in a cup. An ice cream or sundae. the boy wanted to play. The nanny told him to sit down and eat every last bite of the sundae. the serving cup was pretty big and the child was pudgy. I couldn't understand why it was so important that the child eat so much junk during the middle of the day, especially if he didn't want it.
Advice on how to resign?
Received Wednesday, March 5, 2008- Perspective & Opinion
I went to work on a very part time basis for a family last November. It's not working out for me. I am unable to warm up to the children, mainly because my child care values are grossly different from the parents. I feel a child should say "Please" and "Thank -You" they feel a child should not have to beg. I feel children shouldn't interrupt adults, they feel a child should speak when they please. I feel a good breakfast is needed before sweets can be given and they feel the children can eat whatever they please beginning at 6AM. I want to be as diplomatic as possible and I am not very good at resignation so I am seeking help in how I should say it. When I was hired the mother told me their last sitter left to go to college but now the dad told me a few weeks ago they have had quite a bit of trouble keeping sitters because no one gets their children. So at least I know, It's not me! Thanks!
I went to work on a very part time basis for a family last November. It's not working out for me. I am unable to warm up to the children, mainly because my child care values are grossly different from the parents. I feel a child should say "Please" and "Thank -You" they feel a child should not have to beg. I feel children shouldn't interrupt adults, they feel a child should speak when they please. I feel a good breakfast is needed before sweets can be given and they feel the children can eat whatever they please beginning at 6AM. I want to be as diplomatic as possible and I am not very good at resignation so I am seeking help in how I should say it. When I was hired the mother told me their last sitter left to go to college but now the dad told me a few weeks ago they have had quite a bit of trouble keeping sitters because no one gets their children. So at least I know, It's not me! Thanks!
Severance or No Severance?
Received Wednesday, March 5, 2008- Perspective & Opinion
Please help with an issue my wife and I don't see eye to eye on. Two months ago, we hired a nanny through an agency. The "replace for free" period has expired, largely in part due to my wife's desire to give the nanny a second chance to prove herself. I have convinced my wife that she must be fired immediately, (this evening, Wednesday). Over the course of the past eight weeks, the nanny has left our house in a fifth, (she isn't required to clean, only clean up after herself), she has brought ants into the house (in the winter because she dribbles juice all over the place and never wipes the counter down), she drinks 10-12 cans of coke per day in front of our children, despite the fact we have asked her to keep it in her own area, she has broken furniture, (an antique sitting chair), she has crashed in to the garage with the family car, she has driven from our town, (outside NYC) to NYC and back with the emergency brake on causing the brake to need to be replaced, she has used with reckless delight a sort of street language one could only find in the wee hours of the night in dastardly music videos. My six year old son who spent three years in speech therapy has picked up an unfortunate number of these street phrases. I have not liked this individual from day four, on which she "called out" from the intercom in her bedroom. She informed my wife that she was experiencing "severe menstrual cramps" and needed to take a tramadol (?) and return to sleep. I only learned of this later that morning when my wife was working from home while new nanny slept. I don't feel we should have to provide this nanny any sort of severance pay. She has already caused us countless expense, not to mention the nanny fee, (unless we continue to use the nanny agency that placed her here, a nanny agency that is as corrupt and lowly as any organization I have ever encountered. An agency that provided us inaccurate and flat out false information and was of no assistance to us when my wife called, kindly asking for their assistance to deal with some of the earlier issues that came up.)
My vote is no severance. My wife says we must give her two weeks. What say you, the mothers of ISYN?
Please help with an issue my wife and I don't see eye to eye on. Two months ago, we hired a nanny through an agency. The "replace for free" period has expired, largely in part due to my wife's desire to give the nanny a second chance to prove herself. I have convinced my wife that she must be fired immediately, (this evening, Wednesday). Over the course of the past eight weeks, the nanny has left our house in a fifth, (she isn't required to clean, only clean up after herself), she has brought ants into the house (in the winter because she dribbles juice all over the place and never wipes the counter down), she drinks 10-12 cans of coke per day in front of our children, despite the fact we have asked her to keep it in her own area, she has broken furniture, (an antique sitting chair), she has crashed in to the garage with the family car, she has driven from our town, (outside NYC) to NYC and back with the emergency brake on causing the brake to need to be replaced, she has used with reckless delight a sort of street language one could only find in the wee hours of the night in dastardly music videos. My six year old son who spent three years in speech therapy has picked up an unfortunate number of these street phrases. I have not liked this individual from day four, on which she "called out" from the intercom in her bedroom. She informed my wife that she was experiencing "severe menstrual cramps" and needed to take a tramadol (?) and return to sleep. I only learned of this later that morning when my wife was working from home while new nanny slept. I don't feel we should have to provide this nanny any sort of severance pay. She has already caused us countless expense, not to mention the nanny fee, (unless we continue to use the nanny agency that placed her here, a nanny agency that is as corrupt and lowly as any organization I have ever encountered. An agency that provided us inaccurate and flat out false information and was of no assistance to us when my wife called, kindly asking for their assistance to deal with some of the earlier issues that came up.)
My vote is no severance. My wife says we must give her two weeks. What say you, the mothers of ISYN?
Library in Pittsford, NY
Received Wednesday, March 5, 2008Nanny (named Sue?) was about 5ft6, 130-ish pounds and had brown curly hair. Charge (Ella)was 3 y/o with bright red hair. Wearing a purple jumper and striped stockings with mary janes. I too am a nanny and got into a convo with this nanny who basically blew in your families life story to me as she munched on her charges Goldfish crackers. She also talked extremely negatively about your child and family in general. She seems to think that because you pay her $9 an hour you should get "what you pay for" as far as care. Also told me that your husband gets creepy with her every time they're alone. She is EXTREMELY resentful and upon hearing my salary (which she badgered out of me) stood up in a huff to leave- only she couldn't find her charge. I helped her look for literally 5 minutes. When she found Ella she angrily blamed her for "running off" and roughly grabbed her arm and stormed out. Let this be a lesson, if you cannot afford to pay an average salary for an educated/experienced nanny then you CANNOT have a nanny and should choose a diff. care option or better yet, if possible stay home! If you can't do either- shame on you for having kids when you were obviously not prepared to do so (unless in the case of special circumstance).
Tuesday
Whole Foods on Houston in NYC
Received Tuesday, March 4, 2008Stupidest Nanny Sighting Ever!
I was just walking towards Whole Foods on Houston when a nanny had exited with her charge in a stroller. The charge was under six months. The stroller was medium brightish blue, with a bright blue plastic tray and some plaid material trim on it . The nanny had dark hair, so dark it had to be dyed black, a pale face, army green cargo pants, a large black sweatshirt with a pink lion on the breast unzipped with another (peachish) zipper sweatshirt zipped up underneath. The nanny was about 20ish. She looked Irish, but can't say for sure. Attractive, thin. The nanny was trying to light her cigarette and it was raining lightly, so she leans IN TO THE STROLLER, yes under the stroller hood to get shelter from the rain and lights her cigarette. She got her cigarette lit and went on her way pushing the child East on Houston past Elizabeth. The baby was sleeping. Baby was white. Couldn't tell you much else about the baby except she was laying in a super fluffy cream colored blanket. The nanny smoked "Basic" cigarettes. The package was white and red.
Spector Playground in NYC
Received Tuesday, March 4, 2008Obnoxious nanny. Being obnoxious the whole time she was there. Yesterday, (3/3) at Spector PG in Central Park. Busy body. Helicoptering. Ordering about people near her child. She talked so much you would think she knew the right thing to do. Surprised was I when she helped her charge (boy, 3-4, short brown hair, blue nylon racing suit, with white top underneath. was originally wearing brown down coat with rustic look to it, but shed that to play) wait she helped her charge whip down his pants and whip out his penis and pee on a tree right next to the playground in plain site. No shrubs or greenery. Just the boy. I was giving her a look like, "ewww" and she noticed. After the boy finished, he ran to climb back up the slide, something the nanny was policing to the disadvantage of those who were trying to come down the slide. "Wait, let him come up first, he's climbing up. Now let him go back down and you can go". She was totally on my last nerve and saw me looking at her and asked if I had a problem. I suggested that it was called a restroom and she should utilize it. She then said in a booming voice so that everyone could hear her make her point, "it's a boy's penis, what you think that is going to hurt. It's natural 'cept if you have a dirt mind and I guess you do". Yes, this is what she said. I was less concerned about the boy's actual penis than I was her teaching to use the playground as a toilet, but okay. If your nanny is a heartily built black woman in her forties with braided hair that she gathered into a pony tail, who was wearing white on white tennis shoes and brown pants with a burgundy colored jacket, well I don't know what to tell you. You obviously have your hands full already. Oh and I didn't respond at her. I just shook my head at her like she was crazy. And I can't speak for anyone else who was there yesterday afternoon while we were but by their reaction, they were thinking the same thing.
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