Quitting Monsters While Staying On Good Terms - Is It Possible?

I have been working with my NF for over a year. MB and DB are great! I’ve never had a problem with them. On the other hand, the kids have made me not want work with kids anymore, or even have children of my own. But, I would rather not start a rant on them, because this isn’t what my question is about. The point I want to get to is that I am now looking for a new job. How do I tell MB and DB, as well as the nanny company through which I work for them, that this isn’t for me anymore? I want to stay on the best terms possible. Also, how do I go about using MB/DB/the company as a reference for my new job search? Can I use them? Any advice is appreciated.




Anonymous said...

You are smart to not make it about the bad behavior of the kids, but be prepared for the MB and DB to not give you a good reference because some people get angry when a good nanny leaves for any reason. Work closely with the nanny agency to solve the situation, give good notice etc., depend on them for a good reference.

Anonymous said...

Be honest with the agency. They are there to help and support you. Perhaps a certain age group is not for you. Toddlers take a lot of patience and follow through, School aged children test boundaries like no other.
Maybe you are better suited to work with babies. Or another field of work all together. Don’t be a nanny if you don’t enjoy it! Everyone looses if you do. The agency needs to know your needs so they can better place you (if you choose to continue to work with children)
Personally I would not be honest with the parents. Leaving a position is emotional for everyone. And I have felt the wrath of a frazzled mom in the past and I intend to never experience that again.
Tell the parents you have a personal reason you need to leave. Family emergency, medical reason, or maybe that the commute is too much, or you want to persue school and the schedule isn’t going to work for you anymore. Anything but- I can’t stand your kids anymore!
Tell them that you adore them and their kids and that you still want to see them and babysit (even if not true)
Ask them for a written letter of recommendation and/or if you can count on them for a positive reference.
If they say yes to a positive reference, test them!
Make a fake email adress or have a friend call (pretending to be a perspective employer) and ask “is she trustworthy?” “is she reliable?”
Good luck!

Anonymous said...

Oh yeah! (I am above commenter)
I agree with above- you have to give Good notice to expect positive reference!
Give 30 days if you can and say you want to support them in transition and finding a replacement!

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