I interviewed a nanny by phone twice before asking her to come to our home. When she came to our house, she smelled like ethnic food. I was sure she was the one until that. I couldn't handle that.
These are the nannies that didn't get my job:
-the nanny who arrived dressed like she was interning for Vogue. Cute and stylish, but not what I am looking for in a nanny.
-the nanny who was accompanied to our house by her boyfriend. I felt uncomfortable having to accommodate him while I interviewed her and he generally just gave me a strange vibe.
-the nanny who asked how much our apartment cost.
-the nanny who wore sweatpants
-the nanny who told me that she would be teaching my child Spanish
-the nanny who within five minutes of meeting our daughter brought out her cell phone and asked to take a picture.
I know this might sound shallow but I have specific requirements for my nanny and being a NYC mother, the ability to take my children out
in the stroller and just walk is one of them. I didn't hire the nanny who wore the custom orthotics and I didn't hire the nanny who wore flip flops and had thick green & yellow toenails.
Namedroppers! I don't care who you know or who your former charge took ballet with or who you interviewed with yesterday. It's elementary interviewing to focus on your potential employer.
This nanny seemed like the perfect nanny. She met me for an interview at a coffee shop near my Wall Street office. There was a lot of traffic through the coffee shop, largely a male presence. There was something about this nanny. She was attractive but had a very sexual energy. I picked up on the way the men would notice and respond to her. It wasn't a jealous type thing, I just couldn't envision sending my children out to lunch or a museum with her having witnessed the response she elicited from men.
What stands out for me in my lifetime of interviewing nannies is the nanny who made herself comfortable on our davenport and began to launch into stories of her horrible childhood. She shared these stories in relation to why she wouldn't do this or that to any child, but her experience made me very apprehensive.
I had an interview with a nanny with great references and a four year degree. I asked her what she had been doing for the past 14 months, there was a hole in her job chronology. She explained that she went through a rough period after her mother died, got addicted to heroin and did two stints in rehab. I applauded her honesty but I just couldn't see leaving my 14 month old child with her!!!
Tact is a big thing. I offer everyone who comes to our house tea, coffee or juice. This particular nanny asked if she could get 'a sandwich or some soup or something'.
I asked the nanny what she thought after we spoke for a half hour in our living room. The nanny said, "it seems good, but I think I would need to see the place first". I asked her what she wanted to see and she said, "the house where I will be working". And I say, "this is it." She leans in and says, "Mam, I need to see the basics of your house to see if your children have the tools required for me to be successful in this position." The comment pissed me off. I gave her a tour of the house. When we said goodbye, she told me, "I am pleased to see your children have books and no televisions in their room. I don't like the GI Joe toys and there is a lot of clutter." I'm pretty sure she said more. I didn't hire her. Just the thought of her annoys me as I type this.
I had taken to interviewing nannies at the park with my children. This was a great set up because it protected our home environment. The parks are often crowded so connecting with my target was not always easy. One afternoon I was distracted by a nanny wearing a stylish 2 piece velour track suit. She had so much cellulite, it almost looked like her trousers were packed with grapes. Having watched her from every angle on the playground, I just couldn't get past it. I know that probably makes me sound shallow.
I can tell you why I don't give most nannies the job. I interview by phone first. And then I have the Nanny come to our home. 8/10 times the nannies will bitch and moan about the commute. Dealbreaker!
Employers.... Do you want to share your story? Email isynjane@aol.com
35 comments:
Most of these even as I nanny I could understand why you wouldn't want to hire them. But why would it be a turn off if someone wants to teach your child Spanish? I would be delighted to have bilingual children and especially if I didn't have to pay extra for that :)
OH MY GOODNESS!
Wow, several of these come off as extremely pretentious. You wouldn't hire someone wearing custom orthotics? I mean, what are we talking about - shoe inserts? I know tons of healthy active people who have them for running, etc because it corrects minor gait inefficiencies and lets them run long distances? WTF?
I am a "cute and stylish" person but I tone it down for interviews. I know so many middle aged women get all insecure about a petite, attractive 20-something in their lives and it could prevent me from getting the job.
I appreciate your honesty, OP. Though I disagree with a lot of these, I also make snap judgments about people I interview with, and I don't think there's anything wrong with being overly critical of the person you're hiring to be in your family's lives regularly.
I think I get the orthotic thing. The big fear on the UES is having a nanny who sits on a bench. I may be neurotic, but I feel better knowing my nine month old is strolling around on a sunny spring day. Not sitting in a stroller listening to slang vitriol.
I can see where the OPs are coming from and I personally wouldn't hire these nannies either.
Regarding the Spanish, as a parent I would like to be asked if I wanted my child to learn another language. It shouldn't be assumed.
"Insecure Mothers of 'MURRICA, UNITE!!!"
@Kristin, are you a nanny?
And yes, I can understand why most of these weren't considered for a position!
Well I guess you are entitled to your opinion.
Some I can understand why you wouldn't pick .Although I also wonder if there was a language barrier resulting in communication misunderstandings resulting in you being offended, and no harm was meant on the part of the nanny. I can see how communication difficulties could lead to on the job problems.
I am curious to know what these nannies thought of you, and the nannies that turned you down thought of you.
I have crossed many a potential employer off my list after a fabulous interview and job offers for various reasons.
I'm also curious how many nannies you have been through. You don't seem like someone who could keep a nanny long term.
Seriously? Orthotics were a deal breaker? I wear orthotics everyday - I also am one of the most active person you will ever meet. I walk, I cycle, I run, I play. My orthotics do not hinder me one bit. In fact, you would never know I wear them unless you a snooping in my shoes.
Some of these nannies I absolutely agree with not hiring. But dressing cute or teaching your child Spanish?? Those parents are nutso.
I just had an idea for a new segment: "Nightmare interviews" told from both the nanny's and parent's perspectives. Maybe we also need to teach some of these younger nannies how to interview professionally, if they think it is acceptable to divulge their heroin addiction.
I want to send in a list of jobs I was offered but turned down, based on the parents I met and was interviewed by.
It's 8-10 pre-hire visits that are crazy. One of my daughter's friends, pre-screened by an agency, went through a phone interview and 2 home visits. She also has an impressive work history and a degree. When visit 3 was suggested, she refused. The hired her anyway and love her. Get real.
Sorry I misinterpreted OP post in this area:)
I agree. I wouldn't work for any of this bitches.
I get most of them but the sweat pants one irritated me. I personally wouldn't wear sweats to an interview, BUT it is a NANNY interview. Not an office job. Perhaps the nanny's intent was to get down on the floor with the children at some point???
Wow, someone wouldn't hire a nanny because men find her attractive? That's horrible! I'm a person who also gives off a strong sexual energy, men pay me lots of unwanted attention (hint: I'm not straight!), but this is by no means any of my doing or intention. It's just how I am. I'm an awesome nanny!
*blinks*
A few of these are valid reasons not to hire someone.
Others, well let me just say those nannies were probably lucky not to have the misfortune of being selected by you.
I second the interview tips section.
@Sara - I agree, we should have a nanny version of this thread. I've definitely turned down jobs after an interview because the working conditions were not suitable. For example; family I met once had a completely disheveled house, the 4 year old played the Wii the entire time I was there in the same room where we were interviewing, the 2 year old ran around naked, the baby was covered with snot and food, and two very large, very dirty dogs tried to jump on me the entire time (I love dogs, but still...). This was in a wealthy DC suburb and I had an appointment, so it's not like I caught them off guard. Needless to say, I did not accept that gig.
How many nannies have you gone through anyway? Just the thought of working for you annoys me as I type this.
@Sara that's a great idea to send in jobs you refused based on an interview or the parents alone. Or even talk about hellish interviews or " red flags". I have a few I could send in as well! Good idea Sara!
No worries. You probably wouldn't get hired.
Whoever wrote this pathetic piece is my worst employer nightmare.
Thank God I am in Cali and she is on the East Coast.
Good riddance.
That wasn't Sara's original idea. It was Mannah's...
Translation on the "I didn't hire the nanny who dressed cute and stylish" means "I have let myself go since having a kid and no longer dress nicely, have gained weight and don't bother wearing make up, so, I look like hell and am not going to have anyone who looks an ounce better than me in my home"
I see this quite often in my upper middle class neighborhood. All the moms who walk around looking like hobos and the excuse is "I have no time with the kids around" and the kids are2, 3, 4 years old. Get yourself together already!
OP is offended because the nanny wanted to see the work environment!
Yes,an experienced nanny will want to see the work environment to decide if this is the job she wants. I have turned down job offers because the apt. would be difficult to work in. One was an architectural Digest worthy white carpeted don't touch anything no place to play or do messy art projects nightmare. Another was a veritable pig sty with a huge heavy double Bummbleride stroller that meant no trips to the library with steps and a fold the strollers rule. One mom with two toddlers in an apt. that was a minefield of dangers laughingly said "oh we never have gotten around to child proofing". I am always tactful though. I just say I've accepted another offer. Interview in a noisy coffee shop? No thank you.
I think an Interview Tips/Nightmare feature would be great!
I have some interesting stories to tell.
Why thank you knittynanny for giving credit where it's due.
I think some of you are misunderstanding this post. I believe it was written by several different MBs (hence the paragraphing) not by all the same person. If I'm wrong, please correct me, admins.
Sad but unfortunately the children of these shallow women will probably turn out just as nasty and judgmental as they are.
Oh I just skip pass Mannah's posts because I find that she is negative and often does not add much to the conversations unless it's too name call or make someone feel like a complete idiot. So I just saw what Sara wrote. No biggie!
I agree with Mannah. I thought the paragraphs were from different moms. If so, it would make that clear if they were numbered.
Really?
You need them labeled so you can tell they aren't all from one person?
For realz?
"Ugh", you never know when someone might surprise you. Perhaps you should keep a more open mind.
Davis Monthan,
Several people were clearly confused, because several different posts were in succession with no indication that they were from various posters. This not being a discussion of Keynesian theory or the like, requiring great concentration, people do tend to read quickly, and yes, carelessly.
Your snide comment was uncalled for.
Hahaha Manhattan
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