Wednesday

"I'm Just Waiting For My Bonus"

Received Wednesday, December 17, 2008. - Perspective & Opinion
Perhaps some of the parents, or even other nannies, can explain this double standard to me.

Why, as a nanny, is it imperative I arrive to work on time; yet the various parents I have worked for, no matter how nice they are, or what it says in our written agreements, seem to think it's OK to come home late without notice? It seems they feel so long as I am being compensated it's perfectly fine to repeatedly come home late without calling, or calling when it's already past the expected time of arrival, to let me know they will be late.

I am a career nanny, and as I said, no matter what it says in the contract, it always ends up happening. I am with my current family a little over two years and it seems around the 18 month mark, things start going to pot.
Parents who were once considerate and respectful of my own family commitments now seem as if they could not care less!

I always let my boss know well in advance when I need to leave on time. Yes you read right, ON TIME..not early. I have read here that once parents get comfortable with their great nanny, it's inevitable that they begin to take advantage of her. Don't suggest I stand up for myself, believe me, I have and I will again but it never gets me anywhere and I end up collecting my holiday bonus and looking for another position as I am now.

I will likely ditch my latest family once I find a new one. I will give notice, but it simply amazes me that people who need someone to care for their children would treat those of us who do so with so little respect.

It's also very hard to read some of these posts without a jaded eye. After all, it's very difficult to be sweet and smiling with your charges knowing you have to once again look for a new family because all of a sudden the adults in this one, although they claim they can't get along without you, start treating you like something on the bottom of their shoe.

Just to answer some of the obvious points that will be brought up:
Yes. I am a Legal nanny
Yes. I am educated
Yes. I arrive to work on time, neatly dressed and am very organized.
Yes. I interact with the children.
Yes. I earn a competitive wage with sick days, vacation days, personal days.
Yes. I drive, and have a clean background with great references.
Yes this has happened with every family I have worked for so far.
Yes, I do put it in my agreement that I must be notified, at least once week in advance, when I will be needed to remain late. This bars any business, transportation or weather related emergencies within reason.

55 comments:

Anonymous said...

You know what we do at daycare? We charge 'em! 2.00 per every minute they are late. You should have thet written into your next contract - I bet they wouldn't be late so often

Anonymous said...

I know EXACTLY what you are going through. It happens to me too.

What really gets me is when I get a phone call or text message asking if it's ok that they will be a few minutes late.....yeah you're on the other side of town and it's a good hour drive back to your house and it's 30 minutes until I'm supposed to get off so why bother ASKING just say I'm going to be late.

Anonymous said...

hey you are exactly right, and you are not alone : )
it happens to me lots of time

Anonymous said...

I work at an early learning center and once it is closing time all of our teacher's leave, leaving me with children.

I charge $2.00 per minute, per child and this year it has completely covered all of my christmas shopping. I get paid no over time so this is my compensation.

I know stuff happens and I do make exceptions when I know that the parents couldnt help it, but I get tired of the same old excuses. I get TIRED too and when it is time to close I am ready to go home.

Anonymous said...

I like the $2.00 per minute idea, although I wonder if the parents might eventually become resentful of they pay you a good salary. (Not that they would have a right to be...but people are funny that way sometimes.)

How about making very clear in all of your upcoming interviews that you left your last TWO positions because of this particular issue alone. That ought to let them know how very serious you are about not being taken advantage of...that you are willing to leave an otherwise perfectly good job if it becomes an interference with your time with your own family, which also deserves your time.

I know if it were me, I would be sweating bullets about coming home late to you after that!

Anonymous said...

Ugh, this happens to me too, and you're right, it's right at the 17-18 month mark.

It's even more frustrating b/c I'm a very good nanny, and I would think parents would be grateful that their kids are in such good hands, but it's almost as if they are resentful and trying to see how much I'll put up with.

I'm glad I'm not alone, I thought it was just me. :)

Anonymous said...

What if you had in you contract a contingency plan - such as if you are late and I have other plans I am to leave the child with neighbor x or drop the children off w/ Auntie x, etc. Then have, if neighbor x and auntie x are unavailable I will be charging X rate.

Anonymous said...

OMG, I'm in the exact same boat as you! My bosses are home late four out of five nights and I too have to tell them when I need to leave ON TIME. I get to work 10-15 minutes early every morning, and work ten hour days. I'm an educated, American, career nanny, and have been with my current family for just over three years. I do everything for these people and this is the thanks I get. I have been seriously considering moving on, but it kills me to think of leaving the kids.

Anonymous said...

Most high-paying positions do not exactly run by the clock. I am sure your employers would rather be home early with their kids than stuck up at the office dealing with some last-minute situation. If you have a problem with your working hours, which I totally understand, you should bring it up with your employer
and make them see your side, but you also have to see theirs, which may simply be to keep the job that all of you really depend on.

Anonymous said...

I have had several nanny jobs the past year and a half and even though I do not have that particular problem that you mentioned, believe me, I do have the problem of being disrespected a lot by families. I have left several families because of lack of respect and am still searching (hopefully not in vain) for a family that will treat me the way someone who takes such great care of their child should be treated. I have had parents agree to one rate for a certain amount of children, then slowly add in more kids as if they were just "throwing in another sock in the wash." I had a mother who ranted at me because I didn't cut her son's veggies the exact same way she did. For the record, her son was eating them up at the same time as she ranted at me. She also wrote me a bounced check that same day and acted like it was no big deal...and she then got mad at me because I quit immediately w/out notice...uh wouldn't you?!
I think people are under the impression that just because you do not need a college degree to be a nanny, and no special skills or training...then it is a low-grade domestic job. But hey...I beg to differ. Providing love and stimulation/education while a parent has to work is not only hard work, but important work since w/out a good childcare provider, how could these parents even walk out the door to do their jobs? Plus, to know that your child is safe and secure, happy and well-taken care of along w/your home is something that is taken for granted. I am tired of being treated like I am as replaceable as yesterday's newspaper...it's not even about money here....it's about respect.

Sorry so long. Parents if you are reading this, please do not treat your nanny as a servant. Treat her like she deserves to be treated. And NEVER think a good nanny can be replaced just like that. Sure there probably are many waiting in line for her job, but if you have a good one...keep her because there are a lot of bad ones too.

Anonymous said...

I think parents not coming home on time is probably the #1 reason nannies quite jobs. Maybe they know you love the children so they can't imagine you quitting. Others do think as long as they pay you it is ok. Charging an arm and a leg for overtime won't help. They can afford it, and don't mind. The fact that you actually have a life, and other demands on your time doesn't enter their consciousness.

OP, before you quit, I would ask for an evaluation talk, with both parents. Tell them honestly how important this issue is to you, and if they really need flexibility on your end, that you will have to resign. Since they seemed able to get home on time the first 18 months, they probably can now if they know it is important.

Anonymous said...

Disrespected Nanny Too
Oh, you really hit a raw nerve with me! The part about being treated as if this were a "low-grade domestic job"... it makes me wonder why a parent would feel that way when their children are supposedly the most important thing in the world to them. I don't get how we're treated as 2nd class citizens BUT at the same time STILL be good enough to watch over their kids?

I get paid a sick amount of money. I've been with my current family for almost a year. For about the last 2 months, they've been coming in late almost every night. I guess with this economy, we need to understand that they may need to do more now also, in order to keep their job. But honestly, I didn't sign on for 12 hour days. It's getting ridiculous, and I don't think I can take it much longer!

Anonymous said...

I'm just curious how many nannies with this ongoing issue get paid salary vs. how many get paid hourly. I know I'll hear the usual blah blah about what is "customary in the industry" and how the parents' salary, benefits, hours and OT requirements should not factor into the nanny's salary, hours, benefits or OT requirements in any way because well, the nanny is doing an important job. BUT...I can say that with the exception of ONE company where they were stingier than Ebenezer Scrooge and all employees were paid hourly so the gate literally dropped at 5:00.03 to avoid having to pay anyone so much as a half second of OT, I have ALWAYS been expected to meet a deadline, finish a project, remain on duty till my replacement arrives, be available for emergency assignments, courier pickups etc, and they'd laugh in my face and start looking through resumes on file if I griped about how I always had to stay later than the company hours.

I think mom's suggestion is good but I have to agree with Very Anonymous as well. Maybe in your next job you could negotiate a salary that takes into account the OT that you will inevitably work, and see it as a basic part of your job that you are being fairly compensated for, instead of something you never agreed to. Or maybe even negotiate that rate but give the parents a "bonus incentive" of a slight reduction in the rate for a week when they arrive on time or early every night. I also doubt they are enjoying being kept late in meetings w/their bosses or being stuck in traffic when they could be home. If they are calling you saying they decided to meet their buddies for cocktails, that's another thing, but that's probably not the case.

Anonymous said...

I have worked for the same family for 3 years and they are regularly late and sometimes they don't call until it's time for me to leave and I do get frustrated but I know that they struggle to get out of their office on time. They are both lawyers who work long hours and I knew that going in. I guess why I don't quit over it is because they make up for it in other ways. Sometimes dad isn't quite as busy and he will come home 2-3 hours early and let me go and I'm still paid as if I stayed my full day. They are also generous with a bonus for nanny appreciation week and a Christmas. If they didn't make up for it and I felt taken advantage of I would leave so I ubderstand where you ladies are coming from.

Anonymous said...

F IT! I HEAR YOU! Try NOT getting paid for the time! Damn it. One time-- the mom even had the gall to be late becasue she was getting an F ING MASSAGE. WHAT THE HELL...

Anonymous said...

I guess thats why these parents have private nannies. They wouldn't be able to do this in a daycare. Or like the one poster mentioned she would get paid $2.00 per minute every minute they were late.

I agree there are exceptions, traffic, getting stuck at work. But when it happens all the time, the parents are getting too comfortable with their employees.

Maybe, thats the time they should get back-up care. Like a person in the neighborhood to come over for an hour per evening and pay them. Maybe a college student, etc.

Anonymous said...

Soo.. I've just walked in the door LATE AGAIN! SO far my asshole bosses have been 3 for 3 this week. It's already added up to staying late an extra hour and a half this week alone. I hear you OP. I'm damn sick of it. Like you, I get to work 5-10 minutes early. I've been working for the same family for 2 years. In that 2 years I've been late (by 5-10 minutes) a total of TWO times. YES folks, TWO times!! I too have to let them know when I need them there on time. And they are still 5-10 minutes late. One day I had dinner guests waiting in the cold on my porch because my boss was 20 min late. Very Anonymous, while I agree most parents want to come home and spend time with their children not all do. The parents of my charges walk in late ALL THE TIME with grocery bags, boutique bags etc.. They even come home late when they've had the day off (yup, still work when they have the day off). They sleep half the day away (mom boss gets up at 2 or 3 pm often) then they go out and still get home late. I'm an idiot for staying with them. I called the agency the other day to inquire about other jobs and nobody is hiring in my area for the pay I make now. I'm stuck for the moment. Sorry this was so long but OP you've hit a nerve!

Anonymous said...

OP I completely understand and go through the same things. My bosses are not normally late but it happens in other areas of my job. It's like after that year and a half point the honeymoon is over and they just expect things because they pay you. I believe, unfortunately, you will find this with nearly every family you work with. I'm sure there are a few exceptions to this but I've been a nanny for 13 years and it's happen every time. It's a a point where a level of comfort is achieved and they feel ok with taking advantage. It can make you feel very unappreciated and angry.
I guess move on to the next and hope it does not happen again... Good luck.

Anonymous said...

For every minute they are late, come in a minute late the next day.

Anonymous said...

How ironic. Today I get a text message...I'm running late, I am at the mall Christmas shopping.

I've also heard, I'm getting my hair done so I'll be late. Or I'm getting my nails done, or I'm at the gym, or I'm grocery shopping.

I would never be upset because of traffic or weather delays (which we have often because we live in a big city) but it's the other instances that CAN be avoided that really get to me.

Now I work for a wonderful boss, she let's me run errands anytime I need to, I pretty much have free reign when it comes to 'field trips' she cut my hours but not pay so that I could go back to school doesn't mind when I take a day off and there are so many other instances where she is a wonderful lady but just like everyone else I feel taken advantage of at times. The coming home late is a BIG pet peeve of mine.

Anonymous said...

I wish some of the nannies on this thread would talk to my nanny so she'd realize how good she actually has it. Not only was I NEVER late arriving home (I aim for at least 15 minutes overlap at the end of the day so there is time to hear how the day went), we have bent over backwards to accommodate any family issues that arise in her own life. Maybe familiarity just leads to pushing the limits on both sides. Our nanny has been with us for almost 2 years. Last summer she said she wanted to cut her hours back an hour at the end of the day so she could get home to her family earlier. We wanted to make an arrangement that works for all of us, so we hired a babysitter for 90 minutes at the end of the day, planning for 30 minutes overlap so our nanny has time to wrap up any loose ends and transition the kids over to her and to provide a buffer just in case the babysitter is ever late. However, instead of leaving an hour earlier, she started leaving as soon as the babysitter arrives, so cutting 2 1/2 hours more from her week than we agreed to without consulting us. It was only in a casual conversation with the babysitter that we discovered that our nanny is not overlapping with the babysitter as planned. Our nanny also takes the car we provide her for transporting our kids during the day to run personal errands, something we said was OK if the kids were in school/classes so she doesn't have to just sit around waiting, but there has been several days now where we discvered that she failed to take our youngest to pre-school because she was in the middle of something for her own family. So, not only is our child not going to the school we are paying for, she's just dragging her along while she tends to her own family's needs. Also, she frequently brings one or both of her own school-aged children with her to work, which started as a last resort when her own after school care fell through but has turned into a fairly regular occurrence. We have let a lot slide (too much) because she has a great relationship with the kids, they really love her, and she seems to genuinely care for our kids, and we know how difficult it sometimes is to juggle working full time and children, but we are getting increasingly frustrated with her. We're not prepared to let her go because she does do well with the kids, but we definitely are not inclined to go overboard on year end bonus (probaly just a week's salary which seems to be the minimum).

Anonymous said...

I totally agree with OP. I have been with my family for 30 months and it happens to me nearly every day! I am college educated, paid by the hour on the books. I'm suppose to get off at 5:00pm. Mom and dad thinks its o.k. to keep me an extra 20-45 minutes almost everyday. It's not that they are late getting home. They are home on time. They act as if they can't prepare dinner and care for their child. The child will be five years old in February. I don't see the need for three adults to entertain one child. Why can't they give her a puzzle or a coloring book and let me go home? Usually one parent is sitting and drinking tea and reading a magazine while the other one cooks. WTF? And no, they do not pay me for all that extra time!

Anonymous said...

Oh hell no, I wouldn't put up with that. My boss's demand that I be to work at 7:50. I arrive between 7:40-7:49 AM. Always. They know damn well my policy on their returning late. If they negotiate it with me in advance and pay overtime, I will work it as directed. If they arrive home late or call and tell me they will be late at the last minute, they know that over the next three days, I will choose one day-and they won't know which one- where I will show up to work as late as they did.

If their jobs are so important, why isn't getting home to their children as important. Parents with priorities get home on time.

Anonymous said...

Employer,
Is she Jamaican? If you give em an inch, they'll take a mile.

Anonymous said...

anono-NY said...

Employer,
Is she Jamaican? If you give em an inch, they'll take a mile.


Your kidding, right? I highly doubt this employer is Jamaican. They usually tend to be the nanny, not the boss.

Anonymous said...

Ya know, if I ever got a "thank you" or a "sorry I'm late for the tenth day in a row" maybe I wouldn't be so upset. My bosses act like it's no big deal, like my life revolves around them and I couldn't possibly have plans of my own. I feel like they are completely taking advantage of me. They know I have no choice but to stay. What am I going to do? Leave the kids home alone? I don't think so. I've actually thought of packing the kids up at 5:30 and driving them home with me and making my bosses drive twenty minutes out of their way to pick them up. I wonder how that would go over?

Emily said...

OP--have you called a meeting? Explained to the parents EXACTLY how their not respecting your time makes you feel? Explained that if this continues you will be reconsidering continued employment with them?

If the answer is no to those questions then I don't have much sympathy for you. We are all responsible for how we are treated by others. If something isn't working out for you and you DON'T speak up, then it is your fault if it continues.

Anonymous said...

nannyneedsanap, that sounds like a viable solution if all else fails. As long as the nanny is allowed to drive the kids regularly, then why not just take them wherever she needs to go and let the parents come get them? If the parents make the argument that the nanny is only supposed to drive them while she is on duty, then bingo! IF she was supposed to be off duty, why were the parents not there to relieve her?

I remember a nanny on here saying she had done that one time and the parents started getting home on time after that, and I think I said at that time too that the only caveat would be if the parents think that it's then fine for nanny to just keep the kids with her all evening and start taking advantage of tHAT solution.

Shel said...

I hear you!! Almost every family that I have worked for has done this. They seem to get comfortable and then it all begins. Luckily, my current family asks ahead of time if I can stay later on occasion and then makes it up to me on other days by early offs or letting me sleep in and come in later.

Honestly, I feel that even if you talk to them about it, nothing will change. And if you say you are going to charge them, they'll can you. I've been there with nothing changing after numerous discussions.

Quick story: the family from hell I worked for was always running late. I ended up calling it "Tom time" because if dad would call and say he'd be home in 30 minutes, it would be an hour. Tom time was always doubled. Of course, this was the family where the mom would tell me I could never do anything as good as she could. Good times. :)

From now on, OP, make the stipulation in your contract and in interviews that the time issue is something you will NOT budge on. Get it out there from the start and keep at it.

Good luck with them and happy holidays!

Anonymous said...

I was responding to An Employer about her nanny who seems to take and take and take.

Define normal please said...

Yeah so this DOES happen...kind of often with me.. so what happens when they are late and you're over 40 hours per week? do you get overtime? I dont. Also when they "need" you on a day off do you get paid more? I dont. I post a blog about my situation and would love some advise. it's been bothering me and it kind of is the same as this situation. more of my time not equaling fair pay.

Anonymous said...

define Normal...You'd probably be better to post your question here and then we can give opinions. Your post, inviting us to your blog, may be considered an advertisement and removed. (I'm not sure exactly how that works...but write a post for ISYN and send it to the moderators and they will post it here.)

Anonymous said...

Yeah man, that's just in bad form.
We want to be regaled by real commentary not subversive advertisements.

Booooooooooooooooo

Define normal please said...

good thanks for the advise... i was wondering how you actually post stuff so people can answer. its not an advertisement just for the record lol i just didnt know how and where to actaully post a question and when i signed up for this it seem to kind of lead me in the direction of this thing on blogger. idk. but anyway thanks for the advise..how do I send my questions/rants to the mod.?

Anonymous said...

define normal,
I'm not quite sure actually, having never done it myself.
Somebody help! How does she do this?

Define normal please said...

mom, thanks for being so helpful. if anyone read this, i guess I'll do what u said for now and ask my question here. as its kind of the same category. would you think if you work on your day off, you would get paid more than your reg. hourly wage? to go a little deeper, if you work more than a 40 hour week, are you SUPPOSED to get paid overtime? but my main concern is the weekend work. its not often but i feel like if I'm doing them a favor by cutting into my weekend time, shouldnt I be compensated a bit more for my extra time?

Anonymous said...

Define Normal
E-mail your Question/Problem to:

isawyournanny@aol.com

Or you can click the blue link on this Post.

Good Luck!

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

oh.. yes nanny.. start charging for every two minutes they are late. good idea. lets see how long you keep your job. You are a NANNY. you are hired to watch children. the parents.. who are educated and have BETTER jobs than you have might be late. BUT they pay your check. get over it or get a degree. until then.. shut the hell up.

Anonymous said...

getoveryourself -

...the hell? "You are a NANNY. you are hired to watch children. the parents.. who are educated and have BETTER jobs than you have might be late. BUT they pay your check. get over it or get a degree. until then.. shut the hell up."

Bit entitled there, aren't we?

I've been lurking here for a few months, and congrats, you irritated me enough to out myself.

I worked as a nanny for 3 years. I went to a top women's college and have a degree in Medieval History. But oh, right, the parents have Ph.D.'s in ...English. Big. Freaking. Whoop.

If they were going to be late, they called as soon as they knew, and they paid for my time - rounding up to the next 1/2 hour.

If these parents worked overtime at THEIR jobs, they would expect to be - and would get - paid for that time. Why does being a nanny somehow automatically exclude one from that very basic right?

You're a classist snob. Grow up.

Anonymous said...

Uh, not that getoveryourself isn't abrasive, BUT...salary is salary and that means if you work extra hours you don't get extra pay. Hourly pay is HOURLY, so if you work extra, you get paid extra, but if you work less, you get paid less. There are benefits and drawbacks to both. And at all of my previous jobs I mentioned, there was no extra pay for hours over 40 in a week. Because I was paid SALARY, not hourly. Some companies promise comp time in exchange for salaried OT, but it's ridiculous to say that OP's salaried bosses earn more for working OT. If they are paid hourly, then yes, but most high level jobs are NOT paid hourly.

It just seems frequently here that many people expect the best of both worlds. Salary so they get paid for time they don't work but no OT ever required and EXTRA pay for when they work extra. You just can't have it both ways.

Anonymous said...

And justsaying, are you surprised? MANY people are losing their jobs altogether or taking pay cuts so as to not get laid off. This is hardly a time to bitch about having to stay 20 mins late frequently.

Anonymous said...

Thanks, most of you for the great advice and support. I am glad to see I am not in it alone.

Get Over Yourself; your post made me laugh seeing as the mother I currently work for never went to college and holds an excellent job and I have a degree. I left the stressful rat race that is the corporate world to be a nanny as my second, pre-midlife career choice.

I still think that it's as I suspected and others agreed, people just get comfortable after a while and rely too heavily on someone they know they can count on.

Emily, I have called two meetings, explained the situation and things got better for a while then back to the same old but I think I may have rectified it once and for all.

I work a split day; meaning I get the kids ready and on the bus in the morning then come back to receive them in the afternoon. This past Wed, the mother was late again, the third time in a row. She only called one of the three times. Monday it was running an errand to pick up a gift for her husband and Tuesday she decided to take the bus from work straight into town to the car dealer and pick up her vehicle. No idea what happened last night as she was so late I just wanted to get the hell out of there. Yesterday, I was on time in the morning but called the mom at work 10 minutes before the bus was to have arrived in the afternoon and informed her I would be late. She freaked out! I advised her she should call the bus company and tell them to drop off all the other kids in the neighborhood first then drop hers last and hopefully I would be there by then. Of course, I had every intention of being there but I thought giving her a good dose of her own medicine might make her see things more clearly.

Last night when she came home (on time) She told me how upsetting my calling to let her know I would be late was. She said she felt powerless, stuck at work and frustrated that she could do nothing. I apologized and then asked her how she thinks I feel when I don't even get the benefit or courtesy of a call to ask if it's OK if she does her shopping, runs her errand or meets a friend for a coffee after work. Not only am I clueless as to whether or not I should feed her kids, bathe them and do their homework with them, (All things I know she enjoys doing with them herself) but I don't know if I will make it home to enjoy the dinner my husband made me or if I will get to the hall in time to catch my kids in the drama club play. She stood there, looking at me in stunned silence then apologized for being late so often.

We will see if things get better from now on.

Thanks again!

Anonymous said...

Gee OP, I hope it works...although I am feeling guilty just reading it because it seems a bit brazen to do as an employee. if I was your boss I would be royally pissed...although if I was your boss I hope I would have treated you better in the first place and not held you late after work repeatedly. As somebody above said, she does pay your salary. Yikes!

Define normal,
While I wait for your question to come up as a post on th emain page I will offer these opinions on your question:
First, if you get paid a salary it does not matter if oyu work a little more or a little less in a week, you still get the same salary. Of course, if the hours change significantly over an extended time it's definitely time to renegotiate that contract and make the pay match the general hours better.

Second, I cannot even believe the gall fo these people to ask you to babysit after hours and not pay you!! That is beyond crazy! In fact, they shgould not only pay oyu, but they should pay you MORE per hour than you normally make during your regular nanny hours. If you feel too awkward to insist that they pay you (and get the hourly rate agreed to UP FRONT)...or, if they refuse to pay you...NEVER, NEVER, NEVER make yourself available to babysit for them after hours again. Answer every "innocent" inquiry about your evening or weekend plans with a story about something fabulous you have scheduled so that they will not even ask again of you might be free to babysit.

I once had a salaried job as an artist at a company that made boxes. I was the only artist, and the only person there with a college degree...so I made a wage that was equal to the bookkeeper (the other highest paid employee there)..and she obviously knew it. I was fresh out of college and she was old and had worked there for years. She greatly resented me and my salary. Sooo....she watched me like a hawk and would go in and manually write on my time card if I came in 5 minutes after 9:00 or if I took too long at lunch (which I ONLY did when I was having lunch with the boss, since he was in charge of my time and knew where I was and it was obviously OK with him or he would have taken me back to the office on time), and she would take it upon herself to DOCK my pay for what she figured that missed time was worth. But she never added extra time when I stayed late to finsh a project or to meet with clients, or if I worked through lunch. I am a bit shy and I was young and it was my first real "grown up" job, so I said nothing at first about it. Finally one day I had had it because she took a lot of money outof my check. I went to her (secret shaking inside) and told her I wanted my WHOLE paycheck. She refused and went to retrieve my time card, which was entirely hand marked with her notes from the week and showed me why she wasn't going to pay me. (I believe maybe I had been given some time off by the boss to make up for some late work with clients or someting like that....can't remember for sure.) She said I was paid to work from X hour to X hour and she was not paying me unless I did. I said that she then needed to pay me hourly for the after hours work I had done that week (which wuld have resulted in a larger than normal check overall.) She told me that I was a salaried employee and salaried employees don't get overtime. I told her that salaried employees also don't get docked for missing a few minutes either...ESPECIALLY when it's bee preapproved by the boss, or when they are with the boss. She flatly refused to give me more money. But I was very adrenalized from the long argument, so it gave me courage and I marched into the head owner's office and asked him whether he wanted to pay me hourly, or a salary, but that the comapny was not going to enjoy the benefit of having the best of both worlds. (I was very polite in the way I spoke to him though, since I was fairly confident that he had no idea that this lady had it in for me and was messing with me like that.) He walked out and said calmly to the bookkeeper that she needed to pay me the full amount each week. Shge hated me even more after that...but I didn't really care. I eventually left that job when he asked me to work more hours and I asked for a raise to make my salary a bit more commensurate with the going rate for what I did (I had started at a low pay because getting a job in art is sort of like getting an acting job...you have to get your foot in any door you can to start)...but the boss said that would never fly because I would then be paid higher than the bookkeeper and she would blow her stack. OMG!

Anonymous said...

I have to say, this is a "so right on" post.

When I was a nanny, no matter how wonderful the family was, I always ended up getting taken advantage of between the 18-24 month mark... so I just made it a rule that my contracts were either 1 or 2 years and no longer (unless I felt it different).

It is sad when such a good situtation can go to pot.

Anonymous said...

OP, wow! You really drove your point home with Mom. That took a lot of courage, and you did it in what I consider to be a very direct way - I just hope she doesn't take it as a personal affront. You sound like a terrific nanny.

Re: salaried vs. hourly - yes, salaried is different, of course. But even salaried workers deserve the courtesy of a call when the employer is going to be late. It's just BASIC COURTESY. Anyone who uses the "I pay them so if I'm late too bad" excuse probably pulls the lame "I pay your taxes!" bs. Is there a dumber, more entitled line than that?

Anonymous said...

You're right nannynomore, common courtesy should apply for either a salaried or by the hour employee. Rudeness is never accdeptable, no matter how much you pay somebody.
Employees are people that work for you, but contrary to what some people seem to think, you don't actually OWN them outright.

Define normal please said...

mom, thanks for replying and to clarify i do get paid my REG. hourly wage when i sit after hours or weekends. i was just wondering since im cutting into my weekend time or evening time and they usually want a sitter on short notice, shouldnt that qualify for a little bit more than my normal everyday wage. special event sitting should come with special pay lol :o) P.s. i'm paid hourly

chick said...

Actually, in the nanny world salary does often go hand in hand with OT.

OT is most often owed when an employee works more than 40 hours in a week. Since many many nannies regularly work "OT", often our pay is structured as follows:

Nanny works UP TO 50 hours per week for $500. Any hours worked in excess of 50 will be compensated at the OT rate of $15 per hour.

IOW, you are salaried to a point, but then OT kicks in.

(P.S., yes, the sample salary is low. I did it that way to make the math easier.)

Anonymous said...

Chick's example is certainly the norm in my experience. I am surprised so many are saying otherwise. There are many other professions where OT is paid salaried employees after a set number of hours, especially when they are members of labor unions.

Anonymous said...

Calimom.. I know 20 minutes doesn't seem like much to you but when I hardly ever ask to go ON TIME it was a big FU*K you in the face when they came home 20 minutes late.Tonight they were an hour and 15 min late. I mean I get what you're saying about the economy but with all due respect I work 50 plus hours a week and I'm only scheduled for 45. I know it's my fault for not standing up for myself but to echo your economy point, I stay quiet because at this point in time another job that pays as well isn't likely to come about. I was just venting like everyone else, not looking to start an argument.

Anonymous said...

Justsaying, yeah, it is definitely inconsiderate of them to flat out ignore your agreed upon shift for any and all reason. I could see it happening for work related reasons, or on occasion for a coffee date or whatever, but every day when it's avoidable on their part is really annoying. I'd say DON'T show up early, neither you or OP. Just start at exactly your scheduled time.

Anonymous said...

Who gives a hoot if a boss wants to be pissed if you give it to them straight.
Who pissed who first?

Bottom line is this boss was being disrespectful and deserves what she got- some of us may have done it differently, but kudos to you OP. I am all about being direct.

Apparently if you're the boss you are allowed to take advantage of your employees.

As for this whole 'economy' excuse, now you're supposed to take abuse because the economy is bad? honestly, the things that come out of your mouths.

Respect is respect, and goes both ways people regardless of the economy.

Anonymous said...

Em, just hope that your bosses' companies don't fold and their investmenst don't bottom out or you'll need some mighty bandages for that bite on your ass.

Anonymous said...

Calimom, my employers are not the only people who hire nannies.
Where are you from that you don't know these things