Hi MPP, I frequent the website reddit, and came upon a thread that I found pretty disturbing. A nanny is doing a Q and A about her so-called helicopter parent employers, and she's answering private questions about the family on this site. The most disturbing thing is that she uploaded pics of the kids to the forum as well. Their eyes are blurred out, but I think it would be pretty easy for someone to make them out if they knew them. If I had a nanny, I would definitely want to know if this was going on! Anyway, I thought it would be a good post... hopefully someone can recognize her and put a stop to it! - Nanny E
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I don't want to post pics of the kids but if you would kindly send a copy to me in case the parents respond, that would be great. I have not been able to read all of the comments on Reddit yet as I have over 200 e-mails from ISYN to go through but will Publish this for you. Thanks for sending! - MPP
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Here is a table listing all of her answers about the family... it seems she removed the pictures she had up due to so many complaints, but you can still see everything she says about them in the post. I'm not sure if it will help describing the pictures, but one showed a 5 year old boy with shaggy blond hair, wearing a superhero-type cape. The other picture showed an 8 year old boy with brown hair wearing a red striped shirt, laying in the grass. I know that's probably not very helpful, but I'm hoping with all the details she listed, the family can figure it out. - Nanny E
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A cursory view of her comment history tells us she's a 5'2 hispanic, 28 yr old married woman. Her husband is a craft brewer and they live near the intersection of 50th and Hawthorne in Portland. - Reddit
28 comments:
I've only read about a dozen of the responses so far but saw the question and answer thing of hers. I can't believe how personal she got about this family! Can't they sue her for this? Wow, just WOW. So embarassing!
that was pretty wild!
Okay that does seem like a tell all of the nitty gritty of this woman's job, but it's a public forum and weather we think it's right or wrong, good or bad she can write what she wants. And I'll bet you all the tea in China she is at the end of her rope with this family so she is venting in the only way she can to be satisfied. I'm not saying I like it or that I don't but I see all the time on the NPN parents bashing nannies over all kinds of silly things that are not about the job & even some mothers bashing the nannies they employ over all kinds of ludicrous stuff because they are bent. So it's okay for parents to bash a nanny online because she is "the help," but a nanny cannot vent? Sounds a little hypocritical if you ask me. Besides unless the nanny signed a confidentiality agreement there is not much clout if she gets sued.
I myself have heard countless times at the park, library, social centers,NPN, moms out right bashing their nannies for they way they wash the dishes, their boyfriends, how they spend their money, how they look, their cooking skills, cleaning skills, how they dress on their free time, that they stalk their Facebook pages, etc, or my personal favorite how it upsets them their child or children are better behaved for the nanny then them & how much creative fun they have WTF! So if it's not okay for a nanny to vent or give a tell all what makes it okay for a parent to do the same to their nanny or other nannies?
I think this is awesome. If parents want to sue well then they should start with explaining why they don't do taxes to the judge.
Personally I think a 5 year old sucking on your boob is the most vulgar thing ever. If its not for breast feeding then you clearly can't use the breast feeding excuse. That's like a kid shoving a thumb up moms crotch and mom saying, nothing there all dried up. Ew.
Other than that I think it's awesome that nanny is flipping the tables. Is this really any different than this blog? She's telling a story about the parents. I didn't find the table too descriptive. Why should nanny be in trouble for this.
I will say the photo is borderline inappropriate but at least she blurred the eyes from what I heard.
I think ISYN should do a similar styled table to spice up this blog. Perhaps it will teach parents to not do crap they won't be embarrassed about.
Sticking a thumb up mom's crotch? Are you serious!?? Yeah, that's totally the same thing.
You think a human five year old child shouldn't be drinking the milk made for her, from her mothers breast. But her drinking milk made for baby cows is perfectly normal. Humans are the only species on earth to give our young milk made for another species. If you think breastfeeding is sexual or disgusting that's your issue. You're brainwashed. Got milk?
Penny and Ew, both you guys are twisted. NO, it's never ok to talk about the nanny OR the family. And the nanny we're talking about here has no couth and she's an embarrassment to professional nannies everywhere.
At the age of 5??? Suck my dry nipple- yeah that makes a lot of sense. Personally as someone who breastfed both kids adleans an organic and healthy lifestyle, I think there is something cookoo about moms who do that so late in life.
Breast feeding while baby is well still a baby is great but seriously you hippie mothers are weirdos. If you really want breast milk to feed your child then pump and pour it in a cup. Lord knows they are old enough to hold it at 5.
Is that your belief for women woldwide or just in America? In some parts of our world breastfeeding a five year old is common.
Thank you gypsy! I love how your such an outspoken poster! Not afraid to stand your ground!
To the person above gypsy; mom's dry nippies are NOT the nannies business! That ninny of a nanny had NO RIGHT TO PUBLISH THEIR PRIVATE BUSINESS!
Sorry but this angers me. How could that nanny be so insensitive? Who cares how the mom raises HER children? If the nanny doesn't like it, she should leave!
Hey curious-, maybe you should read my response carefully I never said I thought it was right or wrong but the hypocrisy that is tied to it.
UK Mom- Sorry but when you take on a job working in someones home you are under a microscope same goes for the family. When you spend 40 plus hours a week in someones home helping raise their kids your gonna have an opionion on things I keep those things to myself but I'm sure lots of nannies out their don't. And I'm sure MB's & DB's out there have opinions about their nannies lives they don't really care for & like I said they probably gossip about it to friends & family.
Hugs, UKmom!! ;-)
I meant *there*
I finally read the question & answer session. I don't feel she got too personal AT ALL. In fact, its part of my culture & family tradition to value privacy. I bet this nanny did what "we" do, which is tweak the facts. Example....you ask me how old I am, I'll always add or subtract a few years. Where I live? It changes with each post. The reason is for privacy online. Nobody could figure out my real identity because I've tweaked the facts for the sake of privacy. Now, I don't know if this nanny is doing the same thing. But I wouldn't at all be surprised if she was. She could be giving examples of what the parents do as being ones that are only similiar to what they really do.
Even if she is being completely accurate, I don't see her sharing too much at all.
As far as being sued, sued for breaking what law, exactly?
This nanny puts up with a crazy situation. I don't know if she is wonderful or....just plain crazy!!??? LOL
In the original posting, she had pictures of the children. While she had put bars over their eyes, they were definitely recognizable. My husband saw the OP as soon as it was up on reddit and he told me he could easily find this family based on what the nanny posted. In my opinion, she is a bad nanny simply because of this fact and if she has a non-disclosure agreement in her contract, she most certainly can be sued. If she was my nanny, at the very least she would be fired.
Excellent post MissMannah! As soon as I read through all of this I just knew there would be a ton of nannies on her side. They have no idea if this mom was/is a good employer or not. It really doesn't matter anyway because what her nanny did was completely offensive. Those children are innocents and everyone needs to keep that in mind. Putting up their pics for all to see -- that alone should be cause for letting the nanny go!
How has she done anything worse than any of you nannies that post here?
Even if you don't post the kids photos in 90% of the posts or reponses anyone that knows you or your charge could identify you and your charge and charge's family.
This is doubly true for those of you that post your photos and give clues about where you live.
I have posted my photo and talked about where I live. However I never give any identifying information about my work-family, more than my charge's first initial and her age. If someone wants to find me, more power to them. But they would really have to work their ass off if they wanted to find my work-family.
There's a huge difference between how I post and how the nanny on reddit did.
Apparently I'm too old )at just 22, haha) to figure out how to use reddit. I read the table of questions but assume there must be more that I am missing? FYI: I have no idea how to use the twitter either. I just realized that putting "the" in front of the word Twitter or Google makes me sound like an 80 year old, haha.
Lol, I'm right there with you Lyn. Reddit and twitter are both difficult to figure out. I ended up deleting my twitter account because it wasn't as user-friendly as facebook and I couldn't be bothered to mess with it. And I don't use reddit myself, but I occasionally read articles under my husband's account.
We old fogies can stick together! :)
It can be easier to find people than you think. I'm not saying what the nanny at Reddit did was right. It's just not all that different from what many of the nannies on this site post.
An awful lot of you deserve to be fired and sued if dealt with the same way you believe this nanny should be dealt with.
Mannah,
But you don't know who is watching you during the day.
It doesn't take much to put two and two together.
No, you never posted Baby C's picture, but we know you live in OK, that her mom works at home and the baby is a girl born in Nov/Dec 2011, and various aspects of your daily routine and her personality sure it's a lot less than what some nannies post here , but it's enough for a person who recognizes a face to figure out who you work for.
Heck, if they've seen you and know the family they won't have to work hard.
Fooled,
The difference is that the woman on Reddit is posting negative, insulting information about her employers. Miss Mannah likes her current employers and does not post potentially defamatory comments. You have to keep in mind that the table on Reddit is the Nanny's OPINION. Yes, she presents it all as fact and she views it that way. I highly suspect the family would view it differently.
I don't think the nanny sounds horrible. She actually sounds like she cares and wants to do a good job. She sounds like she loves kids and nannying. But posting this is very poor judgment. Comments like saying the parents are lying about their reasons for working at home; how the mother chooses to breastfeed (regardless of whether milk is present, for which we have only the nanny's report); specific insults regarding the kids' behavior (this woman really hates the 5yo) are borderline libelous.
Further, the specific identifying information she posted about the family, including the parents' upbringing, education and occupations is, I believe, clearly in violation of privacy laws. I am not a lawyer so Wiki is going to have to be my source. I know Juris on here is studying to or is a lawyer so perhaps can clarify. But there are clearly grounds for a civil suit imo:
"Public disclosure of private facts arises where one person reveals information which is not of public concern, and the release of which would offend a reasonable person.[13] 'Unlike libel or slander, truth is not a defense for invasion of privacy.'[14] Disclosure of private facts includes publishing or widespread dissemination of little-known, private facts that are non-newsworthy, not part of public records, public proceedings, not of public interest, and would be offensive to a reasonable person if made public." It then goes on to talk about "False Light" which also seems to apply here.
I think this nanny crossed civil and possibly criminal lines. I certainly think she showed very poor judgment and would never continue to employ this woman myself.
Penny,
I agree that the same standard should apply to nannies and parents regarding posting personal, clearly identifying, insulting, private information online.
"You don't know who is watching you during the day."
Oh, please. @@
I've never heard facebook & user friendly in the same sentence unless there was a "not" in front of facebook.
I think I acknowledged that Mannah was not as extreme as the Reddit poster or other nannies that post here.
The fact still remains she posts identifying info. It doesn't matter if she likes her employer or not she and the family she works for could be found , by anyone.
We all got on RBTC for doing basically the same thing.
If what you posted applies to everyone and just celebrities than virtually every person who has posted here could be subject to a civil lawsuit een if they like their current family.
Fooled, you ought to go back and read Nycmom's definition she picked up from Wiki again. You will see that I do not disclose private facts about my employers, I only disclose private facts about myself. You could *possibly* say that the baby's initial or age could be considered a private fact, but seeing as there was a birth announcement in the newspaper, I doubt that allegation would fly. The only way someone could find my employers is if they personally stalked me and followed me to work.
From what I've seen on here, most nannies only post bare minimum about their employers, never giving out names or specific occupations.
RBTC's post wasn't even relevant to this conversation. The children she posted in the picture aren't hers, nor were they her charges.
Insert Moniker, you made me LOL. Facebook sucks, I agree with that! I've since deleted mine. I was just saying it was easier to figure out than Twitter was.
Fooled,
Your language above is a bit hard to understand, but I believe you are referring to celebrities as an example. Celebrities and other public figures are held to a different standard where libel, slander, and privacy laws are concerned. Their actions are considered to have value as public information/entertainment. This is the founding basis for freedom of the press and why celebrities rarely win or bother with suits against tabloids.
Further, what I wrote specifically states that you have to show damages for libel/slander and reasonable offense for privacy laws. Neither pertain in situations where people are speaking positively or quite vaguely about their employers or employees.
RE:
Insert Moniker Here said...
"I've never heard facebook & user friendly in the same sentence unless there was a "not" in front of facebook."
LMAO! good. I'm not alone!
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