Received Thursday, March 16, 2007
Three wheeled double stroller; front and back model. Light blue in color.
Temperature in the park at 11 AM, approximately 68 degrees.
Your nanny brought your beautiful twin boys out to Ancient Playground; off of E. 85th and parked them by the bench where they stayed in their stroller for over an hour.
I left after that, but I would bet money those children never got out of that stroller! The children were likely about two, with light colored, straight hair. The nanny was wearing a red windbreaker, Adidas black track pants and tennis shoes. The nanny enjoyed her time gabbing with her friends both in person and on her cellphone.
Memo to all the working mommies: So many nannies have their cellphones permanently out and glued to their heads, perhaps you should ask the nanny to take pictures of your children P-L-A-Y-I-N-G in the park. How did parking a child at the park get to be acceptable?
21 comments:
I take it you don't have twins. :) I'm the mother of a set about that age, and it is VERY difficult to keep after them outdoors, as they will invariably run off in opposite directions. My twins and I go out for walks in their double stroller, but they do NOT come out unless I have someone there to help me. Their safety comes first.
I think the nanny did quite right in this instance if she felt she wouldn't be able to handle the two of them unrestrained. And I wouldn't want anyone letting my twins out of their stroller unless they were 1000% sure they could keep track of both of them, which is nigh impossible when they're that young.
poster 1,
if you are an incompetent mama, all the more reason to hire a competent nanny. Yeah, it costs more but you can get a nanny who has experience with multiples and actually takes the children to the park to play. If the chidlren cant get out of their strollers, then dont take them to the playground. that's got to be torture! For the kids!
1:11:
Oh come on! What a sad excuse. What do you think people with 3 under the age of 4 do? Chain them to a fence?
Laziness. That's all it is.
--a mom who busts her buns to keep up with her offspring
To the mom who leaves her twins in their stroller unless she has someone else with her-that is disgusting! I take care of children under 3 years old-3 of them at one time, and they play and run around. it means more running around for me-but, i do it. Don't most playgrounds have a fence around them so the kids can't get out? Sheer laziness on your part-and that nanny is really something to. She should be fired!
1:33 -- I don't bring my kids to the playground; they're not old enough. I bring them to the PARK, which is what the OP was talking about. While we're there, we look at the trees, birds, squirrels, and people, practice our words and colors, I run them around in races, and we get fresh air. There IS a multitude of things you can do at a park, surprisingly.
And I don't need a nanny. I choose to stay home with my kids. I WAS a nanny, which is why I read this board. It's really easy to pass judgment when you only know ONE side of the story.
1:47 -- If I were lazy, I wouldn't bring them anywhere, period. But I'm not bringing my children someplace where I can't ensure their safety when I'm by myself. None of the parks in my area are enclosed, and my twins NEVER run in the same direction. It has Jack to do with laziness. I'm fast, but not enough to simulate two separate people.
And, I'm assuming that if you've got 3 under 4, that you've ALSO got at least 1 (if not more) child that understands and will actually STOP when you tell them they're running into danger. Most of us with 2 kids under TWO don't have that luxury. So until mine can adequately follow directions, I'm not going to place them in a potentially dangerous situation. They only get to run around when I can assure that a second set of eyes is there to help me.
This is a playground. NOt a park. There are times my nanny takes my child for a walk in Central Park. But if she tells me she is taking him to the playground, his feet damn well better touch the ground!
As a sometimes at home mom who frequents three of the playgrounds at Central Park, this is not at all uncommon. And it doesn't happen only with twins. And I would most definitely guess that these parents presumed that their children were actually playing. You know, like the kids who are brought to the playground with the good nannies.
I am a licensed daycare provider in the state of Colorado and started reading on this site months ago......I take 6 children to the park and NO ONE sits in a stroller unless it's an infant that can't walk yet. They would NEVER sit in a stroller for an HOUR!!!!. I cannot for the life of me understand why so many people hire nannies......I have been licensed for 15 years and the kids have others to play with...... will somebody PLEASE convince me that a child is better off with a nanny instead of me?! I give my full attention to my kids! Yes....I do get phone calls......but, they are short and sweet. I am JUST not getting the whole nanny thing. I also cannot understand why everyone posts on here anonymously....I'm Katie in Colorado.
Katie in Colorado-
You sound great. I think most people post anonymously on here because it is either faster or they don't just get that "OTHER" is an option!
1:11, this is 1:47 again. I have never seen a set of twins on lockdown before. Truly.
And if they're walking, how are they too young to be at a playground? My kids were out of their strollers at the playground before they could even crawl. They'd do tummy time on a blanket at the playground.
Lastly, 2 is a good age to start teaching them how to listen. It'll take them awhile, of course, but 2 is definitely of the age.
You can have 3 under 4 with 1 good listener, but that doesn't mean you don't have to multi task like a mofo.
I just can't imagine a set of 2 year old twins sitting in a stroller at a playground. Mine wouldn't have it.
Katie from Colorado:
Just as there are good nannies (can't tell from this place, of course), there are good daycares. BUT, just as there are bad nannies, there are bad daycares.
Assuming I found a great nanny and a great daycare in the same day, I'd go with the great nanny.
Kudos to you for being a normal individual. That's an important trait.
I have a 2-yo and last year (when she was 1 and just walking) I also babysat another kid her age, two days a week. We always went to either the playground or the park, neither of which were enclosed by a fence, and it wouldn't have occurred to me to keep the kids in the stroller - that is ludicrous!! I totally understand that with 2 under 2, they tend to go in opposite directions and they don't always stop when you ask them to. BUT...a competent caretaker, fleet of foot, can easily manage this. Sometimes it means grabbing one of them and taking off to curtail another one while holding on to Kid #1 for dear life. But it's far from impossible. Running your kids around the park in the stroller and talking about colors and trees is fine, as far as that goes, but I find it absolutely strange that a mother (or nanny) wouldn't let her 2 kids out to play in a park or playground unless there was another adult to help her. The human race wouldn't have gotten very far if childcare always had to be 1-on-1! Many people have 2 under 2 or babysit that combo (or more). A friend of mine (we are both graduate students and trade sitting a lot) often has 3 walkers under 2 in her care, and she also has a 2-month-old infant. She's never had to strap one of the kids in their stroller. This site is really...something. Interesting to find out how different standards and norms are for childcare in other areas. I'm in Los Angeles, by the way. So we're talking city parks, city playgrounds. If taking 2 toddlers to the playground to PLAY can be done here, I assume it can be done anywhere.
The other thing is, regardless of whether you think it's OK to have one person watching toddler twins at the playground or not (! - still can't quite get over that some people do not) - why the heck would the nanny bring the kids to a playground, if she can't let them out of the stroller? If it's fresh air they need, push the darn stroller around. How cruel to take kids to a place made for playing and not allow them to play, for whatever reason. I find the first commenter's post even stranger in light of the fact that in the original post, the problem is clearly that the nanny took her charges to the park in order to talk with friends and talk on the cell phone while being able to claim that she took the kids to the park. She's being paid to do a job, and that job is NOT chatting with her friends. Not that I would think it was OK for a mom to come to a park and chat with *her* friends while her kids sat in a stroller, but it's even worse IMO if it's a paid caregiver. Clearly the parents are not paying for the nanny to have social hour at the park. Why would anyone defend this nanny's behavior??
I am a nanny in Colorado and Katie I take offense to your post. While you do commendable work (I'm sure) so do I! I am a great and loving nanny with twin experience and they never sat in a stroller unless it was moving! I had more than enough confidence in myself to watch them play and indeed play with them! There are a lot of great nannies, not only here in beautiful Colorado but elsewhere as well. Why let the few bad apples ruin it for everyone?? Tara in Colorado
stacy,
you asked
"Why would anyone defend this nanny's behavior??"
answer:
some mothers, like the one who responded first set the bar VERY VERY VERY low for childcare.
Ah, the bickering again. Can't we all just get along?
Maybe the children were just getting over a cold and Nanny wanted them to have some fresh air, but not overexert themselves. Maybe one or both of the children are hyperactive, or have ADHD, or maybe Nanny usually has another nanny with her and that day she didn't. I'd like to believe there's a valid excuse for it (i doubt it, but we should give the benefit of the doubt..).
I'm a nanny for a 2 yr old girl, and I have my own 6 yr old son. Weather here was absolutely gorgeous Sunday - Wednesday, and I took my son, my charge, and my 3 yr old nephew (who I take care of now and then) to the park every day and managed to keep up with all of them. I never sat on a bench and the only reason my phone came out is because I send a pic of the toddler to her Mom every day, sometimes more than once. I'd say the Nanny (if she was just being lazy) needs to rethink her career in childcare, or get some more training. 2 yr olds are PERFECTLY capable of listening and obeying simple rules - so long as you start the "training" from birth and stay consistent and never back down. My charge wouldn't think of running the other direction if I told her to come to me or stay put!
1:06 Why should everyone get along and just settle with the status quo? Light up another joint and resume residence in lala land where nothing matters and every thing's groovy
I am in this park quite frequently and can say that there is only one way in or out. Just one gate, which is kept latched. There is no danger of a child wandering out of the park. In fact, if there is a child near the gate when I am entering or exiting, I tell him/her "wait for mommy". I have seen other mothers/nannies do the same. Noone would let a child out of the gate by himself. There is no reason why two children should be tied down in their carriage for that amount of time. It's true laziness on the part of the nanny. I see this often.I have also seen the nanny groups gather and sit together. They do not interract with the children, they chat amongst themselves or talk on their cellphones the whole time. There is one nanny who frequently lays on the bench and naps. I mean, sound asleep and snoring. The other nannies watch her child, I guess. This park is also pretty dangerous, with many places for children to fall and hurt themselves. I have seen small children laying on the concrete or in the sand crying and the nanny is nowhere in site. Then I hear a voice yelling "you're OK!" and see the one of the nannies in the bunch. Or they yell at the child for getting hurt and tell them it's their own fault. Most often, the child just wants a hug. My heart breaks for these kids. This is a very popular playground and I urge all mothers to get out of work early one day or take an unannounced day off and observe what goes on. As a SAH mother I am appalled sometimes.
-Kiki
fg, sounds like you need a big hug, darlin. Maybe you should go smoke some yourself. Not that I do, that's disgusting. Peace...hehehe
1:11 just admitted she's a horrible mother. I watched both twins and two little boys 20 days apart. the boys were from when they were both 8 months old and never kept them both tied together. I'm sure the neighbors wondered what in the world I did with both of them at the same time but they weren't related so neither parent had a double stroller so we did a lot of walking and I could carry two at the time and when the became walkers they walked. We lived next to a parking lot (2nd child was there a lot of time) and they tried to take off at the same time but didn't get far. A competent mother or nanny can and will do for her children what needs to be. Pushing/leaving them in a stroller will cause problems later when they don't want to walk anywhere or still go in the stroller than walk any distance when they're 5/6 but good luck with that.
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