Tuesday
Rant! Something Stinks! And Since It's Not In Denmark, I'm Out Of Here!
In what POSSIBLE world do you NM and ND fell it's reasonable to pretty much never have TP, paper towels, and hand soap. I have to buy my own toiletry kit not just for myself but for your child as well so she will not get sick and diseases. What do you use to clean yourself? never mind, do not tell me, I do not want to know, and at this point there is no need for me to know. I want to stick a needle in my eye when I see you wiping off the dirty plates to get off the dried food so you can put them back on the shelf oh so clean. Where I really gag though is the smell when you will not flush the commode. Every morning i come in NG in her poop mess. Your entire house stinks and so does this job! I'm done now. My actual words, " I am so sorry, this is not a comfortable fit, here is 2 weeks notice" But I will be great if let go immediately! No more holding my pee until we go on an outing ! No more cheap trash bags breaking with diapers getting me filthy. No more third world!
Great Nanny Sighting! Nannies and Librarians Saving the World, One Lunch At a Time !
Took my NK, Boy 3y to the library on the bus one day and rain into a mom and child we used to see during storytime when the kids were smaller. When we got up for our stop after theirs I noticed her daughter's lunch bag on the seat as they were in a rush. I grabbed the lunch bag and brought it into the library. The librarian knew who the mom and girl were but not the last name. the librarian called 3 preschools and found the right one where her mom was looking for her girl's lost lunch bag. The mom just had to run up the street and retrieve it for her girl. She was going to give her girl her own lunch and go hungry. When I thanked the librarian she just shrugged and said " It's my job".
{ From ISYN }: The only thing missing on the Nanny and the Librarian are red capes !
{ From ISYN }: The only thing missing on the Nanny and the Librarian are red capes !
Saturday
Who Is REALLY The A%^-hole? Acquaintance Wants To Know How To Handle DANGEROUS NANNY in Virginia beach and Mount Trashmore Area
I am wondering what I should do, I know of a bad nanny/sitter who recently abandoned the children under her care. I feel I should report this person as she is still actively watching after other children while she is severely unable to provide safe and and adequate care as well as being reliable. I am an acquaintance of one of the families, I own a childcare facility and have heard of and wirnessed some of this.
She was hired by a family tp pick up their 2 elementary school age kids from the bus stop and then take them home and be with them until the parents got home,2 hours total M-F as long as school was open. One day she simply never picked them up, no call no show. The kids were new to the area, military family,the kids did not know how to get home safely so they wandered around. The school bus driver saw them and brought them back to the school where the father had to come in from work and pick them up.She had no excuse except the kids were " a%^-holes" and they treated her poorly.
Now she is working with a 1 and 1/2 year old named brayden. Her disregard for his safety is concerning and also she will not engage him him for development but worse is unhealthy aspects - leaving him in a dirty diaper, sleeping with him napping in the same bed which is dangerous, I have not included everything. Should I make the parents aware? If this child dies I will never forgive myself.
She was hired by a family tp pick up their 2 elementary school age kids from the bus stop and then take them home and be with them until the parents got home,2 hours total M-F as long as school was open. One day she simply never picked them up, no call no show. The kids were new to the area, military family,the kids did not know how to get home safely so they wandered around. The school bus driver saw them and brought them back to the school where the father had to come in from work and pick them up.She had no excuse except the kids were " a%^-holes" and they treated her poorly.
Now she is working with a 1 and 1/2 year old named brayden. Her disregard for his safety is concerning and also she will not engage him him for development but worse is unhealthy aspects - leaving him in a dirty diaper, sleeping with him napping in the same bed which is dangerous, I have not included everything. Should I make the parents aware? If this child dies I will never forgive myself.
Wednesday
DEALBREAKERS!!! – Invasion of Privacy - By April Beck ( A Nanny With Many Years Experience)
Nannies do not just care for children, they also must navigate the fears and anxieties of the parents who employ them. Nannies know most parents are nervous when they first leave their child in their care but they also know that as time goes on, the parents they work for will relax and in the end be happy they found someone they trust and whom their child loves.
But there are some parents who just don’t ever relax. They don’t develop trust with their nanny, or else they don't believe their nanny is going to do the job they say they will. There are some parents who miss their child so much during the day they just want to see them at home, playing happily or see where they go during the day. Whatever the motivation, parents have a lot of options if they want to know what goes on when they are away but some actions parents take can cross the line into a violation of privacy and sometimes a violation of their nanny’s civil rights.
Nanny cams are a common way for parents to peek in on their little one and while some nannies are perfectly fine being on camera, some may feel anxious knowing they are being watched all the time and prefer to work for a family that offers more privacy, so it would be best to let them know during the interviewing process so they can make an informed decision. Surprisingly, a lot of parents wonder whether they should tell the nanny about the cameras at all or keep them hidden. This sort of action, though technically legal (check your states laws!) is highly questionable, as there is no real purpose in hiding cameras from a nanny who has already proven themselves through an interview, background check, and a reference check. There is no reason to lie about cameras if all you want to do is look in on your child at play. IF you suspect abuse then why would you continue to leave your child in that person’s care at all? You would basically be using your child as bait for a suspected predator. While there are exceptions, of course, there is no reason I’ve heard from a parent, typically, that would justify taping their nanny without her consent.
Some nannies have had parents assure them there are no cameras in the home, only to discover a hidden camera while cleaning up after months of believing they were not being watched. Needless to say, that is a huge betrayal of trust and an extremely difficult position to be. Nannies love the children the look after but if they don’t feel comfortable in the house or in dealing with the parents any longer, how can she continue working for them? It is not possible to trust parents who will lie about hidden cameras.
Another common way privacy is violated is when parents suggest—or demand in some cases—that their nanny install a GPS tracking app on her phone. This gives parents’ access to her comings and goings at all times, even during her personal time. Parents will always assure they won’t check her location during their nanny’s days off, but how does she know if this is true? Parents insist that this is about wanting to see where the child is during the day because they miss them so much but it seems that it is more about monitoring the number of outings their nanny goes on, to where, when and for how long. The underlying implication is that their nanny cannot be trusted to do the job she has committed to do without intense pressure and supervision. An overstepping of personal boundaries like this, demanding the use of her personal phone which she pays for, and the subtle insult of distrust can all add up and that may be reason enough for a great nanny to find another position.
Parents who do insist on tracking their nanny’s movements during the day but want to be respectful of their nanny’s privacy would simply purchase the GPS device for her to take with her when she leaves the house with her charge. This could be a separate phone she can use while at work or a simple GPS tracking unit she can keep in the diaper bag. This way parents can see where their baby is during the day and leave their nanny’s personal time alone.
For Live-In nannies, violations of privacy can be an almost daily reality. Some parents will come into their space without permission or notice and without knocking. Some parents will come in a search through the nanny’s things when she isn’t there, looking for something to be wrong even if their nanny has done an exemplary job. I’ve heard stories of mothers looking through their nanny’s laundry and even their medicine cabinet to monitor what medicines she takes. Invariably these moms use “concern for their child” as an excuse for this egregious violation of trust and privacy—they “just want to ensure their nanny is trustworthy and able to care for their child properly.” How can a person reconcile violating their nanny’s trust with the excuse of wanting to prove she’s trustworthy? The irony is laughable, really. There is no reason that is justification enough for violating the privacy of a trusted nanny to such an extent. It may not be possible for a relationship to recover a from a violation that extreme.
When you hire and take in a live-in nanny or Au Pair, you agree that she will have a space of her own in your home. You are asking her to put not just her livelihood in your hands but her living situation, as well. For Au Pairs it is even more difficult because they are in a foreign country, thousands of miles from their friends and family and extremely vulnerable. Considerate parents understand this sacrifice and try to make as much room for their live-in nanny as they can. They maintain firm boundaries with their children about their nanny’s personal time and space. This is the best way to show your nanny her contributions are valued and that her basic civil rights are respected. Live-In nannies and Au Pairs are not another piece of property and they can always leave and find a respectful family to work for.
A nanny will be your child’s best friend and trusted companion and the next best thing to their mother. Children love their nannies and when that relationship abruptly ends, they can’t understand why and it is very hard on them. Some children whose families have gone through several nannies have a very hard time bonding with their caregivers and it is a problem that can persist in their relationships throughout their life. When parents mistreat their child’s caregiver, they are impacting their children, too.
It is understandable to have a certain level of anxiety but when raising children there will come a point when they will need to be in someone else’s care. When you hire a nanny and you have a background check done, you’ve talked to her references and you’ve met with her, then you have done your due diligence and can rely on her. Hiding cameras, demanding 24/7 access to their location, sifting through her belongings or any sort of violation of privacy boundaries is never the right way to deal with your fears, it will only spoil an otherwise wonderful relationship. No-one wants to be a revolving door for caregivers and no nanny wants to be next in a long line of unhappy nannies.
If you are a nanny that has experienced a violation of privacy by a parent, we’d love to hear from you about it—did you quit or did you work it out?
But there are some parents who just don’t ever relax. They don’t develop trust with their nanny, or else they don't believe their nanny is going to do the job they say they will. There are some parents who miss their child so much during the day they just want to see them at home, playing happily or see where they go during the day. Whatever the motivation, parents have a lot of options if they want to know what goes on when they are away but some actions parents take can cross the line into a violation of privacy and sometimes a violation of their nanny’s civil rights.
Nanny cams are a common way for parents to peek in on their little one and while some nannies are perfectly fine being on camera, some may feel anxious knowing they are being watched all the time and prefer to work for a family that offers more privacy, so it would be best to let them know during the interviewing process so they can make an informed decision. Surprisingly, a lot of parents wonder whether they should tell the nanny about the cameras at all or keep them hidden. This sort of action, though technically legal (check your states laws!) is highly questionable, as there is no real purpose in hiding cameras from a nanny who has already proven themselves through an interview, background check, and a reference check. There is no reason to lie about cameras if all you want to do is look in on your child at play. IF you suspect abuse then why would you continue to leave your child in that person’s care at all? You would basically be using your child as bait for a suspected predator. While there are exceptions, of course, there is no reason I’ve heard from a parent, typically, that would justify taping their nanny without her consent.
Some nannies have had parents assure them there are no cameras in the home, only to discover a hidden camera while cleaning up after months of believing they were not being watched. Needless to say, that is a huge betrayal of trust and an extremely difficult position to be. Nannies love the children the look after but if they don’t feel comfortable in the house or in dealing with the parents any longer, how can she continue working for them? It is not possible to trust parents who will lie about hidden cameras.
Another common way privacy is violated is when parents suggest—or demand in some cases—that their nanny install a GPS tracking app on her phone. This gives parents’ access to her comings and goings at all times, even during her personal time. Parents will always assure they won’t check her location during their nanny’s days off, but how does she know if this is true? Parents insist that this is about wanting to see where the child is during the day because they miss them so much but it seems that it is more about monitoring the number of outings their nanny goes on, to where, when and for how long. The underlying implication is that their nanny cannot be trusted to do the job she has committed to do without intense pressure and supervision. An overstepping of personal boundaries like this, demanding the use of her personal phone which she pays for, and the subtle insult of distrust can all add up and that may be reason enough for a great nanny to find another position.
Parents who do insist on tracking their nanny’s movements during the day but want to be respectful of their nanny’s privacy would simply purchase the GPS device for her to take with her when she leaves the house with her charge. This could be a separate phone she can use while at work or a simple GPS tracking unit she can keep in the diaper bag. This way parents can see where their baby is during the day and leave their nanny’s personal time alone.
For Live-In nannies, violations of privacy can be an almost daily reality. Some parents will come into their space without permission or notice and without knocking. Some parents will come in a search through the nanny’s things when she isn’t there, looking for something to be wrong even if their nanny has done an exemplary job. I’ve heard stories of mothers looking through their nanny’s laundry and even their medicine cabinet to monitor what medicines she takes. Invariably these moms use “concern for their child” as an excuse for this egregious violation of trust and privacy—they “just want to ensure their nanny is trustworthy and able to care for their child properly.” How can a person reconcile violating their nanny’s trust with the excuse of wanting to prove she’s trustworthy? The irony is laughable, really. There is no reason that is justification enough for violating the privacy of a trusted nanny to such an extent. It may not be possible for a relationship to recover a from a violation that extreme.
When you hire and take in a live-in nanny or Au Pair, you agree that she will have a space of her own in your home. You are asking her to put not just her livelihood in your hands but her living situation, as well. For Au Pairs it is even more difficult because they are in a foreign country, thousands of miles from their friends and family and extremely vulnerable. Considerate parents understand this sacrifice and try to make as much room for their live-in nanny as they can. They maintain firm boundaries with their children about their nanny’s personal time and space. This is the best way to show your nanny her contributions are valued and that her basic civil rights are respected. Live-In nannies and Au Pairs are not another piece of property and they can always leave and find a respectful family to work for.
A nanny will be your child’s best friend and trusted companion and the next best thing to their mother. Children love their nannies and when that relationship abruptly ends, they can’t understand why and it is very hard on them. Some children whose families have gone through several nannies have a very hard time bonding with their caregivers and it is a problem that can persist in their relationships throughout their life. When parents mistreat their child’s caregiver, they are impacting their children, too.
It is understandable to have a certain level of anxiety but when raising children there will come a point when they will need to be in someone else’s care. When you hire a nanny and you have a background check done, you’ve talked to her references and you’ve met with her, then you have done your due diligence and can rely on her. Hiding cameras, demanding 24/7 access to their location, sifting through her belongings or any sort of violation of privacy boundaries is never the right way to deal with your fears, it will only spoil an otherwise wonderful relationship. No-one wants to be a revolving door for caregivers and no nanny wants to be next in a long line of unhappy nannies.
If you are a nanny that has experienced a violation of privacy by a parent, we’d love to hear from you about it—did you quit or did you work it out?
Tuesday
What is wrong with parents today? Shared by Award Winning Teacher Cindy Clark Craft (from an online group of which she is a member)
I left work early today after an incident with a parent left me unable emotionally to continue for the day. I have already made the decision to leave teaching at the end of this year, and today, I don't know if I will make it even that long. Parents have become far too disrespectful, and their children are even worse. Administration always seems to err on the side of keeping the parent happy, which leaves me with no way to do the job I was hired to do...teach kids.
I am including photos that I took in my classroom over the past two days. This is how my classroom regularly looks after my students spend all day there. Keep in mind that many of the items damaged or destroyed by my students are my personal possessions or I purchased myself, because I have NO classroom budget. I have finally had enough of the disregard for personal and school property and am drawing a line in the sand on a myriad of behaviors that I am through tolerating. Unfortunately, one parent today thought it was wrong of me to hold her son accountable for his behavior and decided to very rudely tell me so, in front of her son.
Report cards come out later this week, and I have nearly half of my students failing due to multiple (8-10) missing assignments. Most of these students and their parents haven't seemed to care about this over the past three months, though weekly reports go out, emails have been sent and phone calls have been attempted. But now I'm probably going to spend my entire week next week fielding calls and emails from irate parents, wanting to know why I failed their kid. My administrator will demand an explanation of why I let so many fail without giving them support, even though I've done practically everything short of doing the work for them. And behavior in my class will deteriorate even more. I am expecting this, because it is what has happened at the end of every other term thus far.
I have never heard of a profession where people put so much of their heart and soul into their job, taking time and resources from their home and family, and getting paid such an insultingly measly amount. Teachers are some of the most kind and giving people I have ever met, yet they get treated so disrespectfully from all sides. Most parents can't stand to spend more than a couple hours a day with their kid, but we spend 8 with yours and 140 others just like him. Is it too much to ask for a little common courtesy and civil conversation?
It has been a dream of mine for as long as I can remember to have a classroom of my own, and now my heart is broken to have become so disillusioned in these short two years. This is almost all I hear from other teachers as well, and they are leaving the profession in droves. There is going to be a teacher crisis in this country before too many more years has passed unless the abuse of teachers stops.
People absolutely HAVE to stop coddling and enabling their children. It's a problem that's going to spread through our society like wildfire. It's not fair to society, and more importantly, is not fair to the children to teach them this is okay. It will not serve them towards a successful and happy life.
Many will say I shouldn't be posting such things on social media...that I should promote education and be positive. But I don't care anymore. Any passion for this work I once had has been wrung completely out of me. Maybe I can be the voice of reason. THIS HAS TO STOP.
UPDATE: Thank you, everyone for your words of support! I'm feeling a little shell-shocked over the attention I have gotten, to say the least. This is something I had no way of anticipating and have taken a few days to come to terms with.
I never intended to be a spokesperson for anything. I'm not the most qualified to do so, and I'm certainly not the best teacher out there, by far. But obviously my words, spoken in desperation that day, have struck a chord with many people. My Facebook Messenger inbox has been inundated with comments from teachers and others worldwide in agreement and support of my post.
If I could have the moment back, I might have said some things differently. For one, I would have pointed out that I have many amazing, hard-working, respectful students who show up every day and give their best and also many supportive, loving parents. For them I am thankful and hope I haven't offended. But my frustration was also in their behalf. Because the actions of some are hindering their educational experience.
I believe this post resounded with so many because it speaks to three main issues we must address as a society:
First, the education system as we know it needs reform. It is broken and inadequate for our children.
Second, we absolutely have to hold our children to a higher standard of accountability in all areas. Inflating their success doesn't raise self-esteem. If it did, we wouldn't have the highest teen suicide rates in history right now.
Third, we as a society have to get back to treating one another with manners and respect. We are only going downhill with hatred and name-calling. No one wins when kindness dies.
I am a woman of faith and have been quite reflective this week on the good that I can bring to this world because of this experience. I have decided to (as soon as feasible) start blogging my feelings on all of the above and hope many of you will join me in the discussion. If we all work together, we can make the changes we need for our collective success.
I am including photos that I took in my classroom over the past two days. This is how my classroom regularly looks after my students spend all day there. Keep in mind that many of the items damaged or destroyed by my students are my personal possessions or I purchased myself, because I have NO classroom budget. I have finally had enough of the disregard for personal and school property and am drawing a line in the sand on a myriad of behaviors that I am through tolerating. Unfortunately, one parent today thought it was wrong of me to hold her son accountable for his behavior and decided to very rudely tell me so, in front of her son.
Report cards come out later this week, and I have nearly half of my students failing due to multiple (8-10) missing assignments. Most of these students and their parents haven't seemed to care about this over the past three months, though weekly reports go out, emails have been sent and phone calls have been attempted. But now I'm probably going to spend my entire week next week fielding calls and emails from irate parents, wanting to know why I failed their kid. My administrator will demand an explanation of why I let so many fail without giving them support, even though I've done practically everything short of doing the work for them. And behavior in my class will deteriorate even more. I am expecting this, because it is what has happened at the end of every other term thus far.
I have never heard of a profession where people put so much of their heart and soul into their job, taking time and resources from their home and family, and getting paid such an insultingly measly amount. Teachers are some of the most kind and giving people I have ever met, yet they get treated so disrespectfully from all sides. Most parents can't stand to spend more than a couple hours a day with their kid, but we spend 8 with yours and 140 others just like him. Is it too much to ask for a little common courtesy and civil conversation?
It has been a dream of mine for as long as I can remember to have a classroom of my own, and now my heart is broken to have become so disillusioned in these short two years. This is almost all I hear from other teachers as well, and they are leaving the profession in droves. There is going to be a teacher crisis in this country before too many more years has passed unless the abuse of teachers stops.
People absolutely HAVE to stop coddling and enabling their children. It's a problem that's going to spread through our society like wildfire. It's not fair to society, and more importantly, is not fair to the children to teach them this is okay. It will not serve them towards a successful and happy life.
Many will say I shouldn't be posting such things on social media...that I should promote education and be positive. But I don't care anymore. Any passion for this work I once had has been wrung completely out of me. Maybe I can be the voice of reason. THIS HAS TO STOP.
UPDATE: Thank you, everyone for your words of support! I'm feeling a little shell-shocked over the attention I have gotten, to say the least. This is something I had no way of anticipating and have taken a few days to come to terms with.
I never intended to be a spokesperson for anything. I'm not the most qualified to do so, and I'm certainly not the best teacher out there, by far. But obviously my words, spoken in desperation that day, have struck a chord with many people. My Facebook Messenger inbox has been inundated with comments from teachers and others worldwide in agreement and support of my post.
If I could have the moment back, I might have said some things differently. For one, I would have pointed out that I have many amazing, hard-working, respectful students who show up every day and give their best and also many supportive, loving parents. For them I am thankful and hope I haven't offended. But my frustration was also in their behalf. Because the actions of some are hindering their educational experience.
I believe this post resounded with so many because it speaks to three main issues we must address as a society:
First, the education system as we know it needs reform. It is broken and inadequate for our children.
Second, we absolutely have to hold our children to a higher standard of accountability in all areas. Inflating their success doesn't raise self-esteem. If it did, we wouldn't have the highest teen suicide rates in history right now.
Third, we as a society have to get back to treating one another with manners and respect. We are only going downhill with hatred and name-calling. No one wins when kindness dies.
I am a woman of faith and have been quite reflective this week on the good that I can bring to this world because of this experience. I have decided to (as soon as feasible) start blogging my feelings on all of the above and hope many of you will join me in the discussion. If we all work together, we can make the changes we need for our collective success.
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