31 May, 2010
-What do you make? $1400 per week
-How many hours do you work? between 14 and 44. I do what needs to be done.
-Do you have an overtime rate? At one point we negotiated $25 per hour OT but I have not asked for it in over a year because I have such flexibility with my schedule.
-Are you provided health insurance? Offered? I am on the same policy as the family.
-Do you get a yearly raise, and if so; how much? $50 per week.
-Are you paid your normal salary while the family goes away on vacation? They don't go away without me.
-How much more do you make when you travel with the family? I used to make a ton of money to travel with the family, but the boys are older now, and my boss trusts me to set up things for them while we are away such as ski lessons or surf lessons, so I get plenty of down time. On a normal day, I make $280 a day. What has happened of late is that my boss will pay me my regular check and the give me an envelope with cash in it forthe extra days and time and kind of as a thank you.
-Do you get sick days? How many? When I was hired, i was told I have 5 per year. I don't take them. I took one, last year and that was only because I had to have all my wisdome teeth pulled.
-Do you get personal days? How many? I think I was told I get three, but I don't take them. I never did. I have a flexible schedule now, so I get what I need done when I can fit it in.
-Do you get vacation days? How many? I get about 8 holidays per week and two weeks vacation per year. I always take time at Christmas to be with my family, but usually a week. I never take two weeks and I work non major holidays. Even if I don't work all day long, I work a portion of the day- just to get done what needs getting done. My boss never asked me to do this. I just started doing this. Sometimes it is a pain in the butt, but my boss demonstrates her appreciation for me every day.
-What kind of holiday bonus do you get? Very generous.
-How long have you been in this position/had this nanny? I have been with this family 4 1/2 years.
-Location? Greenwich, CT
-Anything else? (Memberships to gym, theme parks, etc.) When I decided I no longer wanted to be a live-in, I started looking around for an apartment. My boss told me to wait four months and I could have all of her furniture from her living room, bedroom and kitchen. She was redecorating. Her furnishings were only about three years old. She also bought me a brand new memory foam bed and pays for my cell phone- which is a very high functionning cell phone, and honestly too many perks to name.
-What do you make? $340/week-
How many hours do you work? 45 hours
-Do you have an overtime rate? no
-Are you provided health insurance? Offered? no and no
-Do you get a yearly raise, and if so; how much? 10.00/week
-Are you paid your normally salary while the family goes away on vacation? yes
-How much more do you make when you travel with the family? traveled once, got $100.00 for a long weekend. Wouldn't do it again unless they were taking me to Disney World.
-Do you get sick days? How many? 3
-Do you get personal days? How many? 0
-Do you get vacation days? How many? 1 week of my choosing, one of their choosing. Somehow they have forgotten about the week of their choosing for the past 4 years.
-What kind of holiday bonus do you get? none
-How long have you been in this position/had this nanny? 5 years
-Anything else? (Memberships to gym, theme parks, etc.) We have a membership to the children's museum (not that I would ever go there on my off time)
I am a nanny in Tulsa, OK
-What do you make? $350/week salary
-How many hours do you work? scheduled to work 35, but generally am only needed about 25. about one week a month only have to work about 12-15
-Do you have an overtime rate? no, if I ever go over 35 hours (and they said it will likely never happen), I will receive $10 per hour
-Are you provided health insurance? Offered? no -Do you get a yearly raise, and if so; how much? unknown, I will request at my one-year anniversary when the contract is renegotiated
-Are you paid your normally salary while the family goes away on vacation? yes
-How much more do you make when you travel with the family? I do not travel with the family
-Do you get sick days? How many? I have taken 2 unpaid sick days since being with this family.
-Do you get personal days? How many? no, but I have so many days I am scheduled to work but the family doesn't need me, that I don't need more personal days.
-Do you get vacation days? How many? I am allowed unpaid vacation time, because I can provide my sister to substitute for me. I am taking a 3-day vacation next week, my first, and don't have another planned.
-What kind of holiday bonus do you get? have not received any sort of bonus yet
-If you're an employer, would you guarantee your nanny work until her maternity leave begins?
-Would you pay her for any portion of her maternity leave?
-Would you make special accomodations for her to return to work after she had the baby?
-How long have you been in this position/had this nanny? 7 months
-Anything else? (Memberships to gym, theme parks, etc.)
No. I was on the verge of desperation to find employment, so I took what I could get. The salary is reasonable for my location and I love the family, but when it comes to renegotiate the contract, I will request a raise and possible benefits. I also will request mileage reimbursement because I take their son to his school which is 12 miles away. I don't have a lot with this job, but I'm happy.
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I spent some time ( 4 days ) in a mental hospital back in 2007. Without getting into it too much I hit a rough patch with losing a family member etc. It seems when families are doing my background check they are running into this hospital stay. They are frightened and won't hire me, what do I do?
I'm greatly in need of advice. I've been kind of unhappy at my job, I am a live in and work 45 hours or more a week. I love the kids dearly but I do not enjoy living here all too much. Not to mention most days I am not off on time because now i have to pick up the two oldest who are 16 & 5 from school and it puts me getting home 1/2 hour later than I'm supposed to get off, and then rushing out the door to get to my own classes (by the way no one acknowledge that adds up to 2.5 extra unpaid hours a week... or any other extra hours they have me work... for my already less than minimum wage salary). The parents sometime argue to the point that it gives me panic attacks, and when mom boss doesn't like how something was done, and boy she likes it perfect, she resorts to yelling at me. There have been other instances that have led up to this moment over the past 2 years, like not paying for 1 day off when my grandfather died, leaving for a week on vacation and leaving me with the kids without asking me if that's alright (actually that's happening next week... and god knows I wont be paid for it).
Ive been keeping my eye out for a new job the past year but being the way the job market has been, nanny jobs, especially live in ones offering a car too were few and far between. Last week I happened to see one and curiously contacted the woman and everything is sounding well... wonderful and perfect for me... itd be part time all they need is someone to come through the house 1-2 hours a day and straighten up but not clean, they have a cleaning service, and 15 hours of babysitting and be making exactly the same amount that I am now. Thats perfect for me, then I can spend more time studying and less time working and still make enough to pay my other bills. Ive done a phone interview and they love me already and said I sound like I will be a good fit for their family, and invited me to come meet the family. I honestly feel with 99.9% assurance that I will be offered the position. which i cant be more happy about.
But there is a downside, I really dont know how to QUIT my current live in job, the parents are going away for a vacation next sunday and will be gone for a week without the kids, and then I am supposed to have my one week paid vacation (the only paid vacation i get other than the standard holdiays) the first week of july. Now if I'm offered the job before then, I am affraid to give notice before I go on vacation, for fear that they will decide not to pay me for that week and or might kick me out right then. I thought I could tell them when I got back, I told the new family I could start first week of august, leaving current family 3 weeks notice. Is this okay? I feel really bad not giving more notice or even telling them I was interviewing.
And yet there's one more thing to make me feel bad about quiting, they plan on putting their son in a co-op preschool 2 days a week and having me be the helper, as shes talking about this, I feel awful knowing very well that I probably wont be there when he starts preschool, and that Id be leaving shortly before school starts making it hard for them to find any care since they have no family around the area, but I dont want to tell them sooner for fear of A) being kicked out right away and B) losing my paid vacation for which I cant afford to go on if im not paid that week but the plane tickets have been purchased.... I plan on telling mom and dad that while i was looking for some extra weekend babysitting opportunity, I came across this live in ad and it sounded like a good opportunity, so I went for it and got it, and it would give me more time to concentrate on school since itd only be part time. This is a very sticky situation... How do I tell them? Email? Letter? Sit down n Chat? Any advice?
30 May, 2010
(updated with photo; May 30, 2010)
Crappy Nanny @ Vesuvio park today in Manhattan - This nanny totally neglected 2 children she was watching and spent the entire time on the phone. The little blonde girl approx. 4-5 fell off her bike and the nanny didn't console her at all; to the point where other nannies stepped in to console her. There was a sibling, a little boy in a green tee shirt and she neglected him and left him in the stroller while he was crying. This nanny sucked and should be ashamed of herself. Her cell phone was her priority and she could care less about those kids. She was older, maybe 50, West Indian, wore a green camo hat, blue striped shirt, blue jean jacket, khaki pants, gold rings on her fingers, and sneakers.
The children she was watching were a blonde little girl that wore knee pads for her bike and a helmet and the little boy had long brunette hair with a green hooded sweatshirt with a lightning bolt on the back. I hope the parents know their kids are not safe with this nanny, neglected and shown no compassion or comfort when they needed it. She had her back turned to them the whole time and the kids could have run out of the park onto Thompson St. and she wouldn't have known. (Note: photo will be posted soon)
29 May, 2010
I was a nanny for a family in Brookline Massachusetts. Their house is disgusting. Dog poop and pee everywhere. A huge mess no matter where you walk. No silverware tray. The dogs are never walked. No changing table for the 2 year old. No diaper pale. Just the kitchen trash can. The kitchen stinks because of this and because the dogs are let out to poop and eat on the sun porch. The house stinks when you walk up to the front door. And it's just a MESS. Even after the cleaners come. I quit this job because I couldn't stand being in the house that much. It was awful. I gave my notice because I absolutely dreaded going to work each day. They would sleep in and the kids would be late for school. It was awful. Luckily I have found a new position I am very happy with. But I think I am obligated to alert some sort of authority. The kids crawl around that disgusting floor, where the dogs poop more than once a day. I mean, it gets picked up but never cleaned so it can't be sanitary. They are also some of the most inconsiderate, and rude people I have ever met in my life so i wouldn't feel too bad if they got a wake up call. They should be embarassed that they live in such filth. What should I do? I care for the children and think the parents should be FORCED to clean their home.
1) Childcare, maid , housekeeper, organizer, for demanding family (New Jersey)
I can clean, do childcare, drive/ chauffer, homework help, making snacks, organizing sports or games, errands, heavy cleaning, floors, bathrooms, windows , Laundry, ironing, etc. I enjoy cleaning and childcare, I'm very energetic, honest and dependable. and you could pay whatever. I'd just like to serve and be an 73/2-42/5-****
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28 May, 2010
Where: Samuel Seabury Park- 96th and Lex
When: 5/28 at 10am.
What: Nanny napping for 20+min!
Stroller: Brown/green Maclaren Quest.
Child: Boy about 16-20 months? Sandy hair, blue short sleeved shirt, khaki pants. White/navy velcro Nike's. Blue "lamby" and sucks thumb.
Nanny: AA w/braids and glasses.
27 May, 2010
Nanny sighting, Riverside park. Nanny with black pram, african with african hat on and accent assuming to africa. Nanny was pushing pram but first the pram isnt for such a big kid. Her charge was about 1 1/2. Second, she was feeding him out of a full size cereal box and she was feeding him "sugar smacks". The cereal in a red box with a frog on it. Third, she asked me to watch the boy while she went to look for a restroom. I am a stranger to her. I could have kidnapped that child! The nanny was dressed in nurse shoes, s print smock and pink linen pants. Like a nurse, I guess. The child had not much hair at all, huge brown eyes, white, wearing a striped polo with just two stripes, white and green. He ate more sugar smacks in the time I watched them than any twelve year old should!
Hi. Something happened the other day with my nanny. First, let me tell you she is an excellent nanny and has been with my family for two and a half years.
She loves our two daughters and it is apparent by the excellent care shown to them by her. I have absolutely no complaints but am troubled by the incident of the other day.
She's become an integral part of our family and loves our jack russel terrier and he her. It's part of her duties to bathe the dog weekly and she loves to do it. When I came home early the other day
she was in the midst of grooming our dog and he was wearing a muzzel. Our dog is the most laid back, non aggressive dog imaginable so I was puzzeled as to why the muzzle and asked her what was going on. Well, it seems as if she puts tooth whitening strips on him each time she grooms him and muzzles him for thirty minutes after in order to keep them on. I didn't know what to say. His teeth are always pearly white and his breath is never bad because she also brushes his teeth. If this is animal cruelty, I need to stop it, I know. Please let me know what I need to do if anything. I did tell her that I wasn't sure she should continue with the tooth whitening treatment and would let her know. I really do enjoy having such a well-groomed animal.
Update: Monday, May 31, 2010
I am the employer of the nanny who has been whitening my dog's teeth. I want to thank your readers for their mostly curteous advice and wanted to give you an update. I've advised my nanny that she is not to do that again and that she needs only groom our dog once a month. I also gave her a $55 a month raise, just because. Thanks to all.
I wrote a few weeks ago about whether 2 weeks notice was appropriate to give to a family even if the second week of notice fell during their vacation. Since then, I've moved on to my new job (with new baby!) and it's been great.
You may recall that my main problem with he previous family was that I was paid hourly, and the parents jumped at every opportunity to cut my hours-mom would take a day off, come home early, not pay for holidays off- leaving me with an unpredictable income source.
Given that experience and the fact that I had two job offers, I felt comfortable telling my to-be employers that an unpredictable income was the major source of my discontent with my last employers. They assured me that I would be paid the same weekly salary even if they didn't need me for all of the hours. I've already had a handful of early dismissals and days off (like when Grandma is in town and wants to babysit) and I've always gotten my salary as promised.
This week, I got a text early Monday morning saying baby was in the hospital with a virus and not to come. They called Monday to say they'd been ordered to stay overight so I was off Tuesday. Same call on Tuesday. Wednesday's call was that they expected baby to be discharged Thursday afternoon, but they took the week off so I was off, too. A full (unexpected) week off. I asked if there was anything I could do to help and she said I could come by 2 days to walk the dog and sanitize the baby blankets. I did that and also straightened up so they wouldn't come home to clutter.
Today, my boss called and said they were discharged and baby was doing well and should be good to go next week. She also said I could stop by tomorrow to get my check. I know this was our agreement, that I get paid even when I'm not needed, and I do need the money, but I feel horrible accepting it! Should I refuse? What's the appropriate thing to do here?
I recently hired a lovely nanny to care for my 4 month old son full time. In addition to checking her background and references, I also spent a week "orienting" her prior to my return to work. Also, I am privileged to work from home three days a week and have had plenty of time to see the nanny in action. She's amazing! She's competent, attentive, patient, and so loving to our son. We feel like we won the nanny lottery!
Still, being a nervous first time mom, I decided to use a nanny cam just to ensure that Nanny was as great with my baby on the two days I don't work at home. To my delight, she absolutely has been. She coos with and sings to and plays with and rocks my son all day. But... I did notice something peculiar on the video two days in a row while I was gone. Nanny had a camera with her and took pictures of the rooms inside my house. This strikes me as peculiar behavior and I don't know what to make of it. If I bring it up, I have to tell her about the camera. Does anyone have any insight or advice?
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Start getting in your responses. Our first segment of "What do you pay/What do you get?" will run on Memorial Day. Please answer all questions as specifically as possible and indicate if you are a nanny or an employer? Send your responses to email@example.com or use MEEBO in the sidebar to submit your answers anonymously.
If you choose to post your answers as responses to this post, they will not be included in the May 31 post.
-What do you make?
-How many hours do you work?
-Do you have an overtime rate?
-Are you provided health insurance? Offered?
-Do you get a yearly raise, and if so; how much?
-Are you paid your normal salary while the family goes away on vacation?
-How much more do you make when you travel with the family?
-Do you get sick days? How many?
-Do you get personal days? How many?
-Do you get vacation days? How many?
-What kind of holiday bonus do you get?
-If you're an employer, would you guarantee your nanny work until her maternity leave begins?
-Would you pay her for any portion of her maternity leave?
-Would you make special accomodations for her to return to work after she had the baby?
-How long have you been in this position/had this nanny?
-Anything else? (Memberships to gym, theme parks, etc.)
25 May, 2010
A Franklin Lakes, NJ woman testified in state court Monday there were hints during the summer of 2006 that something was going on between her 12-year-old-son and his nanny but the first confirmation she had was through her close friend more than a year later.
Anchorage Police Department officers have arrested Anchorage resident Christina Moua, 23, on one charge of second-degree murder.
The arrest came as a result of the investigation of 6-month-old Caiioun Xiong who was hospitalized Friday evening after suffering abusive head trauma.
Babysitter accused of violently shaking baby...
An 18-year-old Auburn babysitter accused of violently shaking a 9-month-old boy she was caring for faces first-degree assault charges.
What??? The babysitter for a five-month-old Fairfax County boy, who overdosed on heroin last year, was given a three-year suspended sentence for child abuse Friday in Fairfax Circuit Court, but the judge told the woman if she failed a drug test, he would impose the entire three-year term.
An Indianapolis teenager, once thought to be the hero in a devastating fire , is now in police custody charged with felony arson.
24 May, 2010
I really shouldn't be complaining. It's my last week. At the end of the week I know I never have to come back, but some recent events have made me totally upset and I'm just looking for advice. Would any of you bring these things up? or hopefully just venting about it will be enough for me.
I work for a family Tuesday-Friday as a live in nanny. Normally I let things slide because I if I stay a little later I normally get extra time off the next day or I get "down time" during the day when the kids are at school. But here's what has happened this week to just really set me off.....It was my birthday Sunday. I normally have saturday-monday off. My birthday was not a good one. I'm away from home, my husbands deployed, and the family I have close by went out of town so I spent my birthday alone. I have done something for the youngest birthday, the mothers birthday, and I'm doing something for the oldest before I leave because her birthday falls just days after I've left, But I didn't even get so much as a home-made card. On top of that she asked me to work this morning (monday) for 1 hour. So I had to get up and work for an hour (without compensation). When I come upstairs the father tells me they will need me to do an overnight tomorrow night. I've only done one overnight and I got an extra day off for it. I'm not sure how or if they plan to compensate me since I'm leaving on Friday. I guess I'm just feeling really unappreciated and needed to vent. The worst part of it all is I gave my notice April 13th, My last day is the 28th of May. So as you can see I've given way longer than a month. When the month was up she still hadn't found anyone so I gave them an extra 2 weeks. I just feel really taken advantage of and I don't know whether it's worth it to express those feelings or to ask for Thursday to be my last day since I'm doing an overnight or what. What would you all do? Any advice is appreciated- rudeness is not. Thanks
I'm currently a full time nanny in Boston looking for advice about Nanny shares.
I work with a now one year old and have a great relationship with the family. I am paid very well and have excellent benefits. The family recently asked me to stay another year, which I agreed. I knew from the moment they hired me that they would put him in daycare. Now that they have asked me to stay longer, he will enter when he is 2. I love the little boy and am very attached. My concern is that my current charge will be to young for daycare and won't get the attention he needs. I've heard negative things about daycare and feel strongly against it for children under 3, unless it's a family's only option.
I want his family to reconsider and wait until he turns 3. I know I have no control over the situation and it's really not my place. So I have created a curriculum similar to a daycare's in order to prepare him for more structured play. I have socialized him very well, we go to playdates, playgroups, sing alongs, and museums everyday since he was 3 months old.
Anyways, I have decided to offer my services to them in the form of a nanny share. I figured it would be the best alternative to daycare, he would get more personalized care and the company of another child for a similar price of daycare.
I have never actually worked as a nanny in a nanny share but have experience with multiple children( twins, siblings). My question is what should I be worried about in this kind of work relationship? What would be a reasonable rate in Boston? For those who don't know the area daycare can cost $350 + per week and in home daycares tend to cost $120-200 per week (I know the family would never go for a in home daycare). What should I expect in benefits? What are some uncommon things that would be put in a contract? Would finding another family be difficult?
Right now I am paid $15 per hour, 40 hrs a week, 3 weeks paid vacation 1 week unpaid, ALL federal holidays paid, plus unlimited sick days, and the only cleaning I do is for the child. I know I have a sweet deal in this economy, and am very thankful.
Also I have already discussed this option with the family who seemed interested, and openly said they never even thought about it. They said they would look into some daycares and families and discuss more details with me as my end date of May 2011 draws nearer.
22 May, 2010
1) Free summer adventure in return for assistance (Seattle)
I need someone to help out periodically on summertime adventures around the northwest -- come along as a nanny, basically, on hikes and camping and beach days and long weekend travels. You'll stay with me and the little ones, meals are provided, and you'll enjoy this for the sights and adventure if you happen to have free time on your hands and you'd like to get out and see the countryside a bit. We get along best with creative, outdoorsy, no-drama types -- maybe a modern-day hippie chick. Must be a dog lover, and don't try to fake it! There's a lot of flexibility to do this, but please understand that the compensation is basically the opportunity for free regional getaways to the beach, the mountains, and everywhere in between, so this is not for everybody. It won't pad your bank account, but it'll stock your memory bank. :)
Special thanks to the following readers for a job well done this week: NervousNanny, Krupitzerb, afnt81, Jessica.Weichert, Kiddiepsyc, VAnanny, MissDee and mbargielski. Thank you for all of your Contributions! Remember, CL-WTF will be Posted every Saturday. Please send next weeks Ads HERE or use MEEBO. And don't forget to include the Links!
TO READ THE REST OF THIS WEEKS SUBMISSIONS: PLEASE CLICK HERE!
21 May, 2010
I was in Central Park today and witnessed these nannies being neglectful and abusive to 3 toddlers. Nanny 1 was sitting on the blanket with a small girl who looked to be around 11 months old. The little girl was crying and the nanny covered her mouth to silence her as well as pulled her down on the ground by the back of her shirt. Nanny 2 was laying down on the blanket with nanny 1. The children that nanny 2 was in charge of were in the stroller asleep, but when one child woke up, she let the child cry for at least 20 minutes without acknowledging it. I walked up and confronted them about the crying child in the stroller asking if she was planning to take her out. Nanny 2 replied "It's not your business". I told her that it was my business since she was a nanny and those weren't her children and i asked who her employer was, whereas she replied "mind your business". I told her that i saw her cover the babies mouth and it was inexcuseable. They were mean, abusive and neglectful. If you know the parents or who these nannies work for, please let them know.
Boy's name Cooper?? African-American nanny w/braids (I think not foreign actually) at McDonald's Ashland & Diversey at 4:30 with little blondish boy 12-18 months (has some rosacea or rash on face) she was NOT watching him, he was in the play area but then running barefoot all over the store (pretty nasty), he climbed a chair almost fell off while she wasn't watching, he ran into my stroller, she was grabbing him by the arm, pretty rough. I'm a mom. I'd fire her.
I am badly being taken advantage of in my current position (baltimore, md) they have me working 45 hours a week for $160 pre-tax - are constantly asking me to do things for them on my off days without compensation (ex: evenings when they need to be somewhere, or a week while they go on vacation), and ive also suddenly become the house keeper too. Mom can be verbally abusive at times (accused me of running off with a mop?!?) and parents fight alot which is very stressful for me, and I have no privacy. All in all, I cant take it anymore, I'm at my wits end. Living here is depressing, and everyone I know can see the toll its taken on my mental and physical health, my studies are even taking a toll, my grades have dropped... (im a college student). Ive been trying for a year to find a new position and have been searching more seriously the past month because this is just no longer tolerable, which is sad because I love the kids, but my sanity here is dwindling. I am searching (in secret, i don't want the wrath of mom to come down on me, or for them to just kick me out if i told them), which makes things tougher since I dont have them on my references and ive been here for 2 years.. oh well.
I'm looking for a job that is:
- full or part time
-offers a vehicle for nanny use
-30-45 hours a week
-a fair wage (not looking to get rich but be paid fairly AND legally)
I dont mind doing some light housework, as long as we agree upon what it is you want me to do... would like a contract to protect both parties.
Ive list myself on:
But I have had no luck at all so far - any advice would greatly be appreciated, anything helps as I see it now. Thanks!
20 May, 2010
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I work for a great family with 6 month old twin babies. These babies are happy and very easy. I do all of their daily care (meals, baths, play, laundry, outings), from waking up until the parents give them their bedtime bottles at 6:30 when I leave, and put them to sleep at 7. A night nurse comes at 9:30 and stays until I arrive in the morning at 6:30 (I work 12 hour days). My question is this: we are going for 10 days to their lake house (without the night nurse) and they have asked me if I would like to work a split shift so that I may have some time to myself in the afternoon. It sounds good in some ways, and in some ways it doesn't. I'm really wondering how other nannies work their hours when traveling with the family, and how you get paid. Can anyone share a successful schedule? Also, I'm concerned because when I'm "off" and around the cabin, how can I not help with the babies if help is needed? Any personal experiences or ideas would be appreciated. Thanks!
19 May, 2010
I am leaving my current nanny position after 9 months to go to graduate school. I am a nanny for two almost-one-year-old babies, a boy and a girl. I will be leaving my job within days of each of their first birthdays and I would love some advice on what to get the babies for a going-away/birthday present.
I am torn between something sentimental, since I will be leaving the position forever, and something practical, since they are babies and won't really understand the sentimentality of it anyway. Ideally I'd like to give them something that they can have and "remember me by", but at the same time that seems a little presumptuous since they are toddlers and likely won't remember me anyway. So I am conflicted. I'd love to hear from other nannies about giving gifts to your young charges, and from parents on what gifts you have received from your nannies or what gifts you would like to receive from your nanny for a younger child. I just don't want to get them something useless that will sit in a box and gather dust, but I feel like getting them a cute outfit doesn't quite convey the love and attachment that I have for the babies. I would love any advice as I really want to do something special for them! Thanks
I have worked for a family in Manhattan with three little ones for about a year and a half. I have watched them grow and loved every minute of it. I am extremely hard working.
Last December, I went on a 14 day trip with this family of three (ages 16 months, 3 and 4 at the time). I am a christian and my family tends to see Christmas as a big family holiday, but I put that aside this year because I needed the money for school (this family is Jewish and had already finished celebrating Hannakah before we left; and they were aware that Christmas was at least slightly important to me.) The trip was from December 15 to December 28. I had been offered $100 a day which seemed low to me (especially with 3 young kids), but I had been on one other trip with them, a three day weekend, which went well, and where I had a two/three hour break in the afternoon (I would wake up around 7 with the kids, work until maybe 1, have a break until 3/3:30, and help until 7:30; a total of 9/10 hours, expenses paid. I did not have my own room, but rather a room adjacent to the children. (I also have 8 years experience and am CPR certified for the record!) During the trip in December, I was not given this afternoon time off regularly. I would wake up with the kids around 7 (sometimes 6), or even be woken sporadically at night by the baby, work until 2, and would rarely get 1 hour for a break, before I was on again until 8/8:30. I slept in the living room on the fold out couch. When Christmas rolled around, I was given an extra 45 minutes off at night. Three seperate times the parents went out at night, so I had to work those hours as well. When time came to be paid, to be honest, I was kind of hoping for some kind of tip. They HAD given me a yearly holiday bonus of $150 three weeks prior, yet I was hoping for something, even a mere $20 for working on a Holiday. Yet nothing.
During the year I am paid $15 an hour and work for them about 20 hours a week; I am called a 'babysitter' by them, not a nanny.
1) What is a good rate (an average rate, nothing super exciting) to pay a Manhattan babysitter who goes on a trip with you a day other than all expenses? I have a friend who makes $160 for two kids, and another that makes $110 for three and another that makes $225 for three... so it is very hard for me to gauge. This is taking into consideration that at least one parent is hands on with you for maybe half of the day. (Preparing breakfast for the kids while the parents sleep in, getting them dressed, getting together snacks, water and sunscreen, etc, taking them to the lake with the parents, playing with them with the parents, putting down one for her nap while the dad puts down the middle son for a nap, more play, helping prepare and feed dinner, bathing all three by myself, helping with bedtime routine as well as light housework, like loading and unloading the dishwaher and tidying up.)
2) Is it wrong of me to hope that I might be tipped on a Holiday I celebrate (and they know I celebrate)?
18 May, 2010
My nanny job of almost 5 years is about to end in the fall and the area I live in is really struggling. Nanny jobs are far and few between around here, so I've started expanding my search. I was contacted by a family who lived 3 hours away from me and within days I was off to their house to meet them. On the phone the job sounded good. Private bedroom and bathroom, children's laundry, housecleaning only pertaining to myself and the children, dinner for the family, everyday care and transportation of the children in the families cars, and watching the children on 2 nights/month so the parents could have a date night. This was all for $300/week, which I know is low, but this was for a four day work week, which would mean I could come home for a long weekend once or twice each month. Plus I figured my only expenses while living with them would be my clothing, car, and cosmetics.
So I spent the weekend with them, got to know the children, met the ex nanny, and really liked them. Although their master bedroom was bigger than my entire home, they were completely down to earth. The only thing that really concerned me was when they took me along to pick up the one of their cars from being detailed. I realized the dad is completely anal about his cars, and I would be scared sh**less to leave a crumb on the seat. No one is perfect though and I figured every family was going to have it's faults and if this was their worst fault, it really wasn't that bad.
Sunday afternoon rolled around and the parents asked me have a talk with them. They came out with a ten page contract and went over every point with me. As we got further into the contract, I realized they were asking for a lot more than we had previously discussed. Now they wanted me to do the family laundry, help out with extra tasks around the house, keep the kids for an extra evening as needed, text or call the parents every time I leave the house with the kids, grocery shop, run errands, set up and oversee household repairs, work late for no extra pay when one parent is traveling, keep children overnight for $40.00/night when both parents are traveling, keep children for a weekend every three months. In addition my bathroom would now be shared with their overnight guests, and the real kicker is that they now decided to tell me that it will be a five day work week. I told them I would need to be compensated for the extra day and they were only willing to pay $25.00 more/week. I would have considered all of these extras had they been brought to my attention before the last day of my trip. At that point I felt like I had been bamboozled and the job was suddenly a lot more than I had bargained for. They said the job was really like a $600/week job as they would be paying for my living expenses including an iphone. After researching the area they live in though, I realized that what they are paying is the absolute bottom of the barrel. I could probably make more than that piecing together babysitting jobs around here.
So 2 hours later as we were going over the last point of the contract and I was sitting there with my mouth hanging open, speechless, the oldest child walked in and asked if I was going to be their new nanny. The dad told her to ask me, and it broke my heart to tell the child that I would love to be her nanny, but had to talk things over with my family at home.
The children were dolls, and the parents and ex nanny were extremely nice, and made me feel welcome all weekend. As people I totally like them. As employers, I'm not so sure. I feel like I'm being swindled.
In my heart, I know this job is all wrong. If they would throw all of this on me after a weekend, how many more responsibilities will pile up once I move in? But then the practical side of me keeps saying that there are no job prospects here, and I'll regret it three months from now when I'm sitting here on food stamps begging for a job a Burger King.
Can you please tell me that my decision to turn down this job is the right one, or should I take the job for the sake of having a job, even if it is faaaar from ideal.
15 May, 2010
I saw a really, really, awfully terrible nanny today. This happened at about 1230 PM. I didn't interact with her at all. I was dealing with my own but kept observing very inappropriate handling and speaking to a child. One thing I heard was that the nanny had packed sandwiches and the little girl grabbed a sandwich eagerly after nanny unzipped the picnic bag. The nanny backhanded her hand-not hard- but inappropriately and told her "That's my sandwich. You're not allowed to have mayonaise". The little girl put her face on her hands and just waited. You could tell the little girl didn't mean anything by it! Then after lunch, the nanny made the little girl run all these paths that she directed. She made her run and was screaming at her "faster, faster". At one point the little girl said her legs were tired and the nanny said, "your legs aren't tired, they're fat".
The reason I think this is the nanny is because she was wearing a baseball cap, with the smalles bulb of a ponytail sticking out. The hat was an NYU hat and her hair was blonde. The nanny had an English accent. Of course, she COULD have been the mother. She was very pale and thin, wearing khaki shorts and a nondescript sweatshirt. The little girl was also pale and white. She had darker hair, medium brown. The little girl was NOT NOT NOT fat. She was normal looking. You could tell all she wanted to do was please this nanny/(mom?). The other reason I think it was a nanny is because there was no warmth relationship between them. The little girl was wearing denim shorts and pink addidas tennis shoes with velcroe buckles. Their picnic tote was a blue and black vinyl square with a long strap.
I've got a pretty crazy situation going on with my job right now, and I'd love some advice.
I'm nannying for a family that has a single child, a 13 month old boy. I started at this position last June, caring full-time for the child. In September, the family enrolled him in daycare because they wanted him to "have socialization with other children" and gave me a minimal amount of notice that my position would be dissolving. Several months later I was contacted by them again when he was kicked out of the daycare due to his behavior (Which is another story in of itself...) I, with some hesitation, agreed to work as their nanny again. I was glad for the work and especially happy that they were willing to work with my new schedule, in which I had classes from 8 - 11. The mother often didn't go into work until 12 often anyway, so it was no problem. Later, though, she decided to hire another lady (Who has no childcare experience) to come in the mornings so that the mother could catch up on her sleep (13 mo still wakes up every hour during the night) and so she could get ready without having to deal with the baby.
Without discussion, they decided that they would be paying me the same rate they paid the daycare for my work - which works out to a measly $5/hour! I take him to storytime at the library every week, set up playdates, go to the zoo, etc (In my own vehicle, with no compensation) and in addition am highly qualified for this position. $5/hr in is no way fair compensation, but I've hesitated to bring it up as I know they can't afford much more than that. On top of that, they often need me to stay several extra hours at least 1 day a week, but give me only a couple hours of notice, if that. They still only pay me the $5/hr for overtime as well. They have taken off on several trips with little warning as well, leaving for several weeks which left me scrambling to budget as I was without pay.
I notified them that my schooling will be switching to online, which opens my morning up and makes me available for full-time pay, which truthfully I am being desperately in need of. The mother informed me that the schedule would be staying exactly as-is because she didn't want to mess anyone's hours up. However, I later learned through the other caretaker that she has been offered an extra 2 hours of work a day, which is frustrating to hear. They had also assured me that if they ever turned up needing care outside of our normal hours, they would give me priority over the other caretaker; I also found out that they have not been truthful about that either.
All of this has led to to wanting to take another position. I've been looking for a couple of weeks but have not found the full-time position that I need. I'd love some tips from other experienced nannies out there about where else I can look; Craigslist (ugh), sittercity, care.com... Any input would be lovely!
1) Submissive Nanny Needed (Ohio)
In search of a submissive nanny,
have a boy 13, girl 11,
looking for a nanny who can take orders no matter!
Live in with great pay and benefits.
Special thanks to NervousNanny for our Feature! Also, thank you to the following Readers for their Contribution: mbargielski, nannybee, CSNanny, Krupitzerb, Cafegirl_78, jerseyxjacqui and cinder38... all of you did a great job! Remember, CL-WTF will be Posted every Saturday. Please send next weeks Ads HERE or use MEEBO. And don't forget to include the Links!
TO READ THE REST OF THIS WEEKS SUBMISSIONS: PLEASE CLICK HERE!
13 May, 2010
A Central Texas nanny arrested and convicted for child abuse ten years ago walks out of jail. Maggie Dittman was 2-years old when she died in 1998.Court records show the child was severely beaten and violently shaken. Her nanny, Alma Guadalupe Quintanilla was convicted for abuse and sentenced to 10 years in prison.
A judge has ordered that a 5-year-old boy rescued in a house fire by his nanny will remain with the man who is raising him rather than go to his mother. Shelby County Family Court Judge John David Myles ruled Friday that Aden Gray should remain with J.B. Hawes of Shelbyville, who has been the boy's primary caretaker his entire life.
Police say a Delray Beach babysitter left a toddler at home unattended to go drink with friends. Then proceeded to drink to the point she was pulled over by police and received a DUI. 52-year-old Theresa Long's arrest report reveals she was arrested Wednesday night on charges of DUI and fleeing police.
A nine-month-old infant was pronounced dead Thursday evening after police said the child's babysitter left the child with an adult who could not properly care for the child.
A 32-year-old Indiana man convicted of molesting children as young as two months old with his girlfriend has been sentenced to 125 years in prison. Stephen Quick II of Veedersburg received the same sentence Thursday that 26-year-old Samantha Light received in December. Fountain Circuit Court Judge Susan Orr Henderson found Quick guilty of three counts of child molesting in March. Light pleaded guilty to child molesting charges.
12 May, 2010
I work for a family that has two young girls (ages 2 and 10 months) and I have been with them since the 10 month old was about 3 weeks old. This family has an EXTREMELY dysfunctional "sleep situation" that I am not sure how to approach.
First of all, ALL of them sleep in the same room (Dad, Mom, and girls). Which, if everyone was getting a good night sleep I would have no problem with... But the two year old has NEVER... I repeat, NEVER slept through the night yet (neither has the 10 month old for that matter). She used to sleep in her crib (which is now the baby's place to sleep) and then she moved into Mom and Dad's bed... Then her parents decided to move the guest mattress onto the floor in their room. Anytime I bring up moving her... There is some excuse (She just got done being sick, or when the company leaves, etc.) And I am not forcing this on them... They bring it up ALL THE TIME! So a few days ago I just decided to do it. I moved her "mattress" into what is supposed to be her room and put her down for her nap in there. SHE LOVED IT! She slept for four hours!!! When I left work that day, her parents said they were going to "try" to put her to bed in there... But, when I got to work the next morning they said "she didn't like it" so they just put her to bed in their room... So I was thinking I would find her in her parents bed. Oh no. They moved THE OTHER guest mattress into their room and I found the mattress in her room where I had napped her the day before STILL MADE from when I made it after her nap!!! I am just beyond frustrated. They ask me to try but then they won't. I know ultimately they can have her sleep where ever they want but both the two year old and the 10 month old are clearly lacking sleep EVERYDAY from their sleeping arrangements. It is a vicious cycle of who wakes up who next!!! I am just exhausted from handling over tired, crabby kids all the time! What should I do?!?! HELP!!!
11 May, 2010
I'm the person who asked about how much I should be paid to be the sole caretaker of an 8 year old boy for the entire summer. Well... you were all right, $500 is definitely not enough money. Unfortunately, I did accept the job at $500. It was my only job opportunity, so it was pretty much $500 or nothing. I know that that's probably all he can afford right now, so he was being truthful and I don't think he's trying to take advantage of me, but it doesn't make the job any easier.
I've been on the job for almost 3 weeks now, and I've had 1 full day off. The relatives who live nearby are nice, but I do feel as if I'm on my own most of the time. The child has a learning disability, as well as ADHD, so doing homework is always a battle. I don't think his father really understands the difference between telling him the answers and helping him, so I get huge amounts of resistance when I tell him to try figuring things out on his own (even things like reading the directions himself). Papers that should take 5 or 10 minutes (I was student teaching in 2nd grade just a few weeks ago so I know what the skill level should be) take over an hour, with me sitting right next to him, prompting him every step of the way. I had a meeting with his teacher and she let me know that he's extremely far behind the rest of the class and I'm going to need to do quite a lot of teaching over the summer in order for him to be successful in the 3rd grade. I can only imagine the way he'll react when I bring that up.
Food is another issue that we have. I've tried over and over to cook things that are healthy and also kid-friendly, but I have had no success. When I got to the house his dad had said that he had done bulk grocery shopping that should last for several weeks, but I discovered that most of it was snack/junk food, or freezer meals. I did some of my own shopping and I've tried to prepare things that he'll like, but I always end up having to stick something in the microwave while I eat the meal I made, alone. With any of my other charges in the past I would not hesitate to tell them to eat what I cooked or not eat anything at all, but as this child has been brought up eating this way and his dad approves of it, I don't know if it's really my place to come in and impose all kinds of new rules. However, I did remove the soda from the fridge and informed him he could only drink it on weekends or as a special treat, which did not go over well. It's hard for me to see him eating this way, especially considering his ADHD, and the fact that all of those processed foods and sugars cannot be helping. I need to bring it up with his dad, but it will probably have to be done in an email, as the kid is always around and able to hear me talking to him on the phone.
I've had some problems with attitude/rudeness, and I often feel like I'm talking to a 15 year old in an 8 year old's body. I made it very clear to him from the beginning that I don't tolerate being spoken to that way, so maybe with time it will get better. I do fun things with him, but it's hard to want to when I get moaning/eye rolling/ talked back to constantly. I'm trying to stick to my guns and be firm, and hopefully things will get easier as time goes on.
This wasn't supposed to be a rant, just an update for anyone who was wondering if I took the job. This job definitely has it's challenges (more than any other nanny/babysitting job I've done) and I'm having a really hard time, but I made the commitment so I'm sticking it out. Luckily it's a short-term position so there is an end in sight. Thanks for all the advice you gave me, a lot of it was useful. I only wish I had listened to all of it ;) =
09 May, 2010
We have a request here at ISYN. If you have submitted a rant, a question or a sighting and there was any resolution to it; please update us. We want to know what has happened since you last wrote. Have you seen that nanny again? Did the parents contact you? Did you have the sit down with your boss (or with your nanny?).
Inquiring readers want to know.
Almost 3 years ago, you were looking for a full-time, live-out babysitter. To tell you the truth, when I interviewed for the position, I just assumed I wouldn't get the job. But you emailed me, wanting to have another interview and have me meet your children and husband. I honestly thought I'd hit the mother lode.
I will admit the job was a bit stressful at first. As you know, taking care of three active little ones is a lot of work. And your kids didn't quite trust me right away, which I in no way took personally. But when I told you I thought the two older ones were telling little white lies (i.e. saying they washed their hands when they were obviously still dry and dirty), you had a long talk with them and I never had trouble with lying again. When I had to put one of your boys in time-out and your husband came in to hear him crying, he shrugged and said, "you should have listened to her." I felt like I had both of you on my team.
The city you live in is my hometown, so I wanted to take your children to all the things I did as a child. We went to museums, parks and the zoo on a regular basis when school was out. I signed the older ones up for a summer reading group at the library. You thought I was going above and beyond the call of duty and were extremely thankful. I loved doing all these things, so I didn't even realize that I was slowly changing my job title from babysitter to nanny.
Your children are wonderful. Your oldest can make new friends with other children in 10 seconds flat; your middle child is the observer, who is the epitome of the phrase "still waters run deep"; and your little one is so adorable with a vivid imagination. Yes, the kids and I had our arguments, but I honestly couldn't tell you the last time I had to put one of them in time-out. The youngest is at a temper tantrum phase right now, but she's realized it doesn't work on me or you. All three of them have such strong moral compasses that just the hint that they might be disappointing me or you or your husband keeps them in line.
I also know you and your husband are hands-on parents. I hear from nanny friends of mine that they see you at the park when I'm not there - getting dirty, chasing them around, and playing games with them. Your kids always have fun stories about what they did over the weekends with you. It's really refreshing to hear, since many parents in your area just plop their kids in front of the TV when the nanny isn't around.
When I started, your littlest one was 7 months old. Now she is getting ready for preschool in the fall, which will pretty much make my job obsolete. My husband and I realized this a while ago, and decided this fall would be when we would move out of state. I can't wait for the next chapter of my life to begin, but every time I look at your kids I think of how heartbroken I will be when I won't be able to see their faces every day. Even though I will be leaving my family, I am absolutely sure that your three children will be the hardest for me to say farewell to.
I am planning on finding another nanny position in my new city, but I admit I'm quite scared. I realize I have had the Holy Grail of nanny jobs and nothing will really compare to this. You have treated me like a professional, always coming home at least five minutes before my quitting time, paying me on time, giving me yearly raises, and ample time (usually more than a month!) if there was a scheduling change. I have always felt like an extremely valued employee.
Even though I have been your employee, you have taken an interest in my life outside of work. When I had to run out of town unexpectedly for a funeral, you were completely understanding. You were great about me taking a few sick days when I had food poisoning. When I came into work sick (but not anything serious or contagious) you set up the DVD player with kids movies and told the kids to be extra nice to me. I tried to return the favor on days you were sick by keeping the kids out of the house and making get well soon cards.
I have been around for 8 birthdays, 4 first day of schools, and one very long potty training session. These children are more than just my charges. I hope you'll be o.k. with me still sending birthday cards to them for, well, forever.
I would like to thank you for the past few years. This has been by far the most rewarding job I have ever had. Even though I won't be leaving for a few months, it's hard for me not to get emotional thinking of the eventual goodbye.
This is very close to what I'm planning on writing in a card when I leave. I wanted people on this site to see that not all mom-nanny relationships are a mess.
Dear Awesome Amazing Caregiver AND mother to your own lovely daughter who is so very kind to my child who is special needs:
This was my first week at a new job. I have never had to have childcare before because I have worked out of my home since my child was born. I found you after interviewing countless sitters and nannies. You are kind, loving, smart, and a hard worker. You work two jobs: one part time in the morning at a restaurant and part time nanny for my own daughter after she gets out of school.
You are a young, single mom who works her butt off. That attracted me to you. You don't have a degree in Early Childhood but your intelligence and patience and common sense and amazing mothering skills far surpass the need for one.
In your paycheck this week you will get your regular pay as well as a gift card to stop and shop. I think next week will be a nice restaurant. I think the week after that will be CVS.
You are worth more money than I could ever pay you. You take care of my child. I have more respect for you than for anyone in the world and if there is ever anything you need, and it is in my power to give it to you, it is yours.
Thank you. Thank you so much.
Love, your employer.
08 May, 2010
1) Nanny/Teacher/Homeschool Asst. Needed Today!! (Las Vegas)
Hi I am interviewing for this exciting and fun position here at my home. It entails some light duties, childcare of one or more children, my daughter being the primary child, as well as her friends for whom I already give childcare. The hours are flexible, and include some nights, as I currently work a second job away from the home. Please come by for an interview, the pay is excellent, and my home is clean and spacious. Need a person or person(s) to start immediately! Thanks
* Responses from CL reader and OP of Ad:
2) RE: Nanny/Teacher/Homeschool Asst. Needed Today!! (Beware) (Las Vegas)
Just a heads up, the pay is not great. I'm sorry... Last time I checked, 35 isn't great for just one child. It works for a daycare, but not a one child thing you know. Especially for a child who is a straight up brat and has no respect or discipline. And as far as watching other peoples kids on occasion, she will give you NO NOTICE prior to getting there. On top of that, she will expect you to still just get the 35 for her child and her keep the whatever money she gets for watching the child from the childs parents. The title for this job is totally misleading, too. She needs someone to come into her home, take her to work (a stripper, no joke), go back to her house and stay up with the child because who knows when she actually goes to sleep and sometimes she won't, and then when mom is done on the pole, go and pick her up. With NO contribution for gas. And if you're real lucky during the "interview", you will be asked to drive everywhere for her and get nothing for gas. Great pay my a**. Don't get me wrong, I'm not knocking the strippers out there, but please.. Be open and honest about yourself. And her house is nowhere near clean. Its actually a huge mess. And because of her philosophy on life, she doesn't even make her daughter help clean up. The daughter will expect to walk all over you and if you try to put her in line, she will lie to her mother about it and make it seem like you did something wrong. Any more questions about this woman, email me. I have PLENTY more to say about this woman. PS... The woman is ABSOLUTELY crazy!
3) Regarding Job Offer (Las Vegas)
My response to the attack made by this woman is that for one, she never showed up for the job, and she told a child's mother that she was on her way and never showed. The money was to be split with her, in response to the defamation concerning her pay for watching another child at my home with my daughter. It is unimportant the nature of my part time job as long as the sitter gets paid properly. She passed very little of any successful interviewing requirements, and was not the person for the job. She could have been honest with us rather than slander us on line. And to insult a child in this manner shows her lack of patience and understanding for anyone, most of all, a child's wellbeing. The woman did not show up for her shift on time as promised and decided to attack us. Most people have privacy with respect to their homes; there were things shared in confidence, and she shared with me personal info as well. I chose to email her and ask her if she was unhappy with the job, she chose to slander us publicly. I will not comment further, as I am aware that she is regetting her actions already.
4) RE: Regarding Job Offer (Las Vegas)
Haha. Sorry guys for posting again... But yes, there are two sides of the story. I did show up on time for my job. Actually, fifteen minutes early. And that says a lot because I was working another job that day, too. When I got there, she sprung another child on me (like I said, with no warning) which is very rude. Plain and simple. Especially after her and I had discussed my schedule for the evening the night before. And as far as splitting the money... Well, wow... That would have barely barely covered gas for the night. I hate how people always are wanting something for free. Like I have said before, 35 a day is great for daycares... But when you have bills to pay, and are only getting 35 dollars for hours of your time at a time, it sucks. And all the things she's wanting for 35 dollars is just ridiculous. As far as not being qualified... That I have to laugh at even more. I have over 5 paid years experience (and many many more unpaid years caring for family members. I have been babysitting since I was 8 and I'm 20 now, so do the math) with children of all ages, but particularly infants and toddlers and children up to 8 years old. Not only do I have GREAT references to prove all that, but I have also volunteered in class rooms actually teaching children. And coincidentally, have great references for that. So, failing to meet any qualifications is a total line of bs. And now on to the whole me not having patience with the kid or not being caring enough. In my opinion, the best thing for that child is someone who will discipline her and show her how to respect someone and their things. Instead of kicking the back of someones car seat because they are talking and she decided that she wanted quiet. Not once, but actually twice. Not only is respect for others something she needs to learn, but respect for herself is important, too. On that note, I feel it is VERY important to tell someone up front and honest about what you're wanting and what your "part time" (even though that's the one paying your bills) job is because hello... You expect someone to drop you off and pick you up from your club. I'm sorry, but that just screams danger just because people are crazy out there and I'm sure whoever reads these posts don't want to be seen with the woman jumping in and out of their car. What would happen if all of the sudden this woman got a stalker or something and she's seen in your car? Then, you all of a sudden have some crazy "fan" following you and your car. Such a risk, right? Now remember... This is for 35 a day. Last time I checked, everyone needs to know what their employer does. Child care plus taxi for 35 dollars? Give me a break. And I definitely am not regretting any decision. I am actually patting myself on my back for getting out of that situation.
PS... I've gotten a lot of emails from others totally agreeing with me... So apparently, I am not the only one who sees this woman as crazy.
We had several awesome Contributors this week... Special thanks to each one for a job well done: JerkFaceJade, MissMannah, mbargielski, nannybee, krupitzerb, alwaysangelnbuffy, kiddiepsyc, CSNanny, Cinder38 and proctorhome. Remember, CL-WTF will be Posted every Saturday. Please send next weeks Ads HERE or use MEEBO. And don't forget to include the Links!
TO READ THE REST OF THIS WEEKS SUBMISSIONS: PLEASE CLICK HERE!
06 May, 2010
For mother's day, I have written this letter for you. No, I have written this letter for you and I and for all we are and all we want to be. Nanny, you take both children to preschool and two and a half hours later, you pick them both up. You spend the time before school running through the Woods with the children or teaching them sounds, words, letters and manners. You spend the time while the children are in school dutifully organizing their rooms and play room, shopping for nutritious foods, selecting their outfit for the next day, laying out their bedding and keeping their laundry clean and pressed. You spend the time after school playing in the park, trekking to Museums or building clay pots, making dinner, serving dinner, cleaning the children up after dinner and their eating area and bathing them. Nanny it is you that puts them in their new pajamas, cleans their ears and cuts their nails. It is you that reads to them upon request, plays leap frog and jumps puddles with them. It is you that dresses them in the morning and feeds them their first meal. You give them their vitamins and make their beds. You plan their days. You are the nanny...
I however am the mother. And despite your deadliest intentions, I am the one my children crave every hour on the hour. When you show up to pick them up from school, their faces fall to the floor. It is me they want to see, me they want to dazzle with tales from the day and they want to spend their afternoons dancing and having tea parties with. And dinner, you think they want to have dinner with you? They want me. Every time you are with them doing your designated duties, my children are wanting and wishing for me.
So don't think for one second that my children are going to going to glue pink, puffy hearts on corrugated paper for you this Sunday. Don't expect a phone call, an American greeting or a flower arrangement. I am the mother of these children.
Your nanny is an obese black woman with short, page boy hair. Today she was wearing a light colored, light strip pattern tank top and gauzy capris. Your child is an average sized two year old white kid with curly brown hair and markedly large blue eyes. He was wearing a short sleeved dark blue polo with two white stripes across the chest Wednesday, May 5. Your nanny had the child at the prospect Park zoo May 5 in a very simple umbrella stroller, green with a white canvas seat. The child was out of the stroller milling about while she watched him. Then she told him to get in his the stroller and he did not. The boy started to play run from her. She got incredibly angry right away. She lumbered towards him like a certain animal and swooped him by his one arm and with that one arm swung him around (180 degrees) and plopped him in his stroller, but the stroller wheels moved, so she picks him back up and does it three more times until he lands squarely (hard) on the seat. So, the kid shouldn't run. He's three. Do you find this acceptable? I don't.
I have been a nanny for a family for the past year. I am leaving at the end of the month to pursue another nanny job. I am wondering what I should get them as a present when I leave, or even if I should. The family has treated me fairly well and has overworked me a little. We are on friendly terms and got each other presents at Christmas. They gave me $100 gift card to Target and flowers. I'm not sure if I'm expecting something when I leave, but I just don't want to show up empty handed or under gifted when I say goodbye. What do you think I should give them? What have you given your charges when you left? Any advice is appreciated!
05 May, 2010
Need other nannies help!
Hi, I am hoping for some nanny opinion on my situation. I am a mother of two (almost 6 year old girl and 4 month old boy) and work about 40 hours a week out of the house. I have had a nanny for about a year, and, 3 or so months ago, a family member became very ill and she requested a decreased work load. She currently works about 15-20 hours a week, and was very understanding that I hired another part-time nanny for the times that she was not around. All in all, we were both very happy with the result of this situation. However, about a week ago, my daughter came to me and told me she likes the new nanny better. First, I wanted to make sure that it wasn't because she got to watch a lot of TV or eat a lot of junk food, but she simply told me that " [Nanny B] plays more and is more fun than [Nanny A]." I asked her what she does with Nanny A, and the answer seemed more to lean towards my daughter playing on her own or watching TV, with not as much interaction with Nanny A. (I asked my daughter if Nanny A was on her phone or out of the room, but it was just that she wasn't as interactive with my daughter as Nanny B. Not that she was being negligent).
I'm a little unsure of what to do. Both children are well cared for by Nanny A, and I'm not at all worried that she is being neglectful, I just know she is going though a very difficult period in her life and her attention is a little distracted from my children at the moment. I would really like to hire Nanny B on a more full term basis, since my daughter seems so much more pleased with her. However, I feel terrible firing Nanny A or cutting her hours down more. I know that some of her paycheck is going towards helping her family get through this time. Of course if she does leave, I will write her a glowing recommendation as well as try my hardest to help her find another job. I would just like some nanny perspective on how you would like to be talked to about this. As you can tell, I'm not the most fluid writer and the baby has been having trouble sleeping lately so my mind isn't exactly in full force, but any opinion would be greatly appreciated!! Thank you!!
Nanny Role and Responsibilities 2010
This is a child-care partnership. The goal is for *** and *** to grow and thrive in a happy, stable environment. Your duties will require a strong work ethic and some flexibility. Our girls are kind, loving, energetic, and affable children. Since we live in the heart of Boston, we want them to have an opportunity to be exposed to the many activities available in our neighborhood for them as well as make friends with other children.
Responsibilities: Your primary and most important responsibility is the safety and well being of the children during the hours that we are away from home. During the day, we expect that you also will undertake a variety of activities to develop the children including reading to them, playing with them and their toys, arranging some classes for them, etc. Our expectation is that no television will be watched during the day. Weather permitting, we also would like to see the children have the opportunity to get out of our home at least once per day (unless of course they are sick) – possible places to visit are nearby parks, the Prudential mall (in inclement winter) and the Boston Public Library (as they get older and can attend reading groups). We also can arrange for you to have access to the children’s playroom and swimming pool at the University Club where we are members and which is two blocks from our home. As you are getting settled in to being our nanny, we will show you around the neighborhood. We will also introduce you to our building staff, who are always happy to help anyone in the building and all adore our girls. (Interested? read the entire job description HERE)
04 May, 2010
Location: Blantyre Park playground, Scarborough, Ontario, Canada
Date and time of incident: Tues May 4, 10:15-11:00 a.m. (this was going on when we arrived and still when we left)
Physical description of caregiver: There were two women of Afro-Caribbean background, not sure which one was the nanny. Younger woman was prob in her 20's, had long cornrow hairstyle; blue jeans and pastel (green?) top, newish black and white running shoes. Older woman was perhaps 50; blue flowery scarf covered her hair; long blue skirt, green (?) top and grey-ish blue cardigan.
Physical description of involved child: Blond girl with longish hair; about 4; wearing a pink sun-hat with strap under chin; pink raincoat; black leggings with a purple top or dress over.
Detailed description of what you witnessed: My daughter and I were in the park for 45 mins and the entire time the two women sat on a picnic table talking while the little girl stood looking miserable by them, not straying by more than a foot from them. She just watched the few other children playing and she looked so sad. The two women hardly paid any attention to her. At one point, the younger woman offered her a snack and the girl didn't want it, so the woman ate it herself (potato chips?) and then started putting on her make-up. The little girl did have a bottle of water, and twice just before we left the older woman did lean over and touch the girl's head or face a bit affectionately - but I think they could tell I was staring at them so it may have been because of that. When we walked by I caught the little girl's eye and smiled at her but she did not smile back. It did occur to me that the child could have some kind of developmental delay or mental condition that made her uninterested in play and fearful of leaving her caregiver. If that is the case, I still find it inappropriate to just take her to the playground and let her stand around while the caregiver and her friend chat for such a long time - they should be doing some kind of activity that is suitable for her! If there is nothing 'wrong' with her medically, then this is a horrible situation - how can you take a child to a park and not engage them in play, push them on the swing etc. It was all very weird. I was reluctant to say anything as I had my 2.5 year old daughter with me and I did not want to enter into a disagreement with these women or criticise them if this is what the family tells them to do with the child. If I ever see this little girl with her parents I hope I will have the guts to say that I saw her in the park with her caregivers and see how they react.
I am usually at work during the day but I am taking some days off to spend with my daughter and I was so disappointed to see this and other behaviour from caregivers at the Peanut Club at Fallingbrook and Kingston Rd, including spending entire time chatting with Peanut club staff, not properly comforting a crying child, texting constantly. It is really a shame!
I have been working at my current job for a little over 7 months and I am debating on how I want to be paid...
When I signed my 1 year contract with my current family it was said that I would be salary paid to work an "average" of 40 hours per week but some weeks may be 50 and some may be 30 but the average in a 3 month period would not exceed 40 hours and if it did I would be compensated for that. I was told I would receive 3 weeks paid vacation (1 week at my discretion and 2 at theirs) but I have gotten a week off just about every 2 months since I have started and have only used 2 weeks of my paid vacation. The other weeks they would pay me, then expect me to make up the hours later (by working extra hours other weeks). Now, I do not believe that this is unfair or anything but it is WEARING ME OUT! I feel like I constantly "owe" them hours and they purposely say "Oh we will pay you while we are gone" just so that they can work me 10 extra hours for four straight weeks! They go out of state often because the Mother's family is there so I do not want to be stuck with a lot of unpaid weeks either. I was thinking about asking to be paid hourly because then I feel this would eliminate the "who owes who hours" thing but I am not sure what they would think of that. I would want to be guaranteed 40 hours but if I were to work over then I would get paid time and a half (I feel this would make them less apt to work me over 40) and if I were to work less I would still get paid for 40 hours... Does this sound unfair? As far as the weeks off, I am not sure what to do. To keep from getting burnt out I may just need to take them unpaid. I feel I am more than available to their changing schedules (Mom and Dad are both doctors so my schedule can vary quite a bit on only 1 weeks notice) and that I work very hard to keep them happy. I am just asking the same in return. ANY tips or advice is welcome! THANKS in advance!