Tuesday

Bamboozled Nanny Looking for Advice and Reassurance

Received Tuesday, May 18, 2010
perspective and opinion My nanny job of almost 5 years is about to end in the fall and the area I live in is really struggling. Nanny jobs are far and few between around here, so I've started expanding my search. I was contacted by a family who lived 3 hours away from me and within days I was off to their house to meet them. On the phone the job sounded good. Private bedroom and bathroom, children's laundry, housecleaning only pertaining to myself and the children, dinner for the family, everyday care and transportation of the children in the families cars, and watching the children on 2 nights/month so the parents could have a date night. This was all for $300/week, which I know is low, but this was for a four day work week, which would mean I could come home for a long weekend once or twice each month. Plus I figured my only expenses while living with them would be my clothing, car, and cosmetics.

So I spent the weekend with them, got to know the children, met the ex nanny, and really liked them. Although their master bedroom was bigger than my entire home, they were completely down to earth. The only thing that really concerned me was when they took me along to pick up the one of their cars from being detailed. I realized the dad is completely anal about his cars, and I would be scared sh**less to leave a crumb on the seat. No one is perfect though and I figured every family was going to have it's faults and if this was their worst fault, it really wasn't that bad.

Sunday afternoon rolled around and the parents asked me have a talk with them. They came out with a ten page contract and went over every point with me. As we got further into the contract, I realized they were asking for a lot more than we had previously discussed. Now they wanted me to do the family laundry, help out with extra tasks around the house, keep the kids for an extra evening as needed, text or call the parents every time I leave the house with the kids, grocery shop, run errands, set up and oversee household repairs, work late for no extra pay when one parent is traveling, keep children overnight for $40.00/night when both parents are traveling, keep children for a weekend every three months. In addition my bathroom would now be shared with their overnight guests, and the real kicker is that they now decided to tell me that it will be a five day work week. I told them I would need to be compensated for the extra day and they were only willing to pay $25.00 more/week. I would have considered all of these extras had they been brought to my attention before the last day of my trip. At that point I felt like I had been bamboozled and the job was suddenly a lot more than I had bargained for. They said the job was really like a $600/week job as they would be paying for my living expenses including an iphone. After researching the area they live in though, I realized that what they are paying is the absolute bottom of the barrel. I could probably make more than that piecing together babysitting jobs around here.

So 2 hours later as we were going over the last point of the contract and I was sitting there with my mouth hanging open, speechless, the oldest child walked in and asked if I was going to be their new nanny. The dad told her to ask me, and it broke my heart to tell the child that I would love to be her nanny, but had to talk things over with my family at home.

The children were dolls, and the parents and ex nanny were extremely nice, and made me feel welcome all weekend. As people I totally like them. As employers, I'm not so sure. I feel like I'm being swindled.

In my heart, I know this job is all wrong. If they would throw all of this on me after a weekend, how many more responsibilities will pile up once I move in? But then the practical side of me keeps saying that there are no job prospects here, and I'll regret it three months from now when I'm sitting here on food stamps begging for a job a Burger King.

Can you please tell me that my decision to turn down this job is the right one, or should I take the job for the sake of having a job, even if it is faaaar from ideal.

42 comments:

cali mom said...

Hmm. I'd suggest that you talk to them, and tell them that there are many things you really like about the job, but some things that would have to be revised in the contract before you could accept it. (You seem to sincerely like them and their kids from what you've seen so far, so this is perfectly true).

Then, figure out what you think would be fair pay for the job as they have described it in writing. I'd say $300/wk divided by 4 (days) = $75/day. Then say that $375 for 5 days would be your minimum base pay, PLUS that divided by however many hours times all the "extra" days and nights they want you to be on for overnights, weekends, etc. AND an OT rate for late nights not agreed on in advance. As it is, it's totally unreasonable of them to ask someone to throw in all those overnights, weekends and an extra day every week for NO extra pay.

How often do they really have houseguests? If it's a week every Christmas, you could probably deal with that but if they constantly have relative families "visiting" for weeks at a time, that would be a big drawback.

Since they do have such a long contract written out, it should be easy to stick to the terms on all sides IF you agree to it, so IF they can meet your minimum pay requirements, you should take it, at least considering it a 3 month trial (but not necessarily telling them that). If they won't budge any further, they are just trying to play the "the economy is so bad I can get anything I want for practically nothing" card, which maybe they can, but for how long?

Emily said...

Cali Mom wrote a great comment!

You shouldn't discount a potentially great job without going to bat for yourself & standing up for what you need. Don't assume the parents are swindling you before you give them a chance to fully respond to your needs.

If they cannot compromise, then it's not a great job and you need to move on without a single feeling of guilt or regret. You owe them absolutely nothing at this point except open & honest communication

Nicole said...

They´re asking A LOT for very little pay. I had a live in job similar to this with the kind of responsabilities you´ll have however I was paid $600/wk for a 30 - 35 hour workweek. I lived in Boston so that may factor in, but you´re really getting ripped off. If you´re feeling adventurous I would look at doing an aupair type gig for the summer. You probably won´t make a ton there either but its an excellent experience. Also if you´re not saddled down to one area you can look for a higher paying job.

Don´t sell yourself short, with your experience you can do much better!

I vote Nay! said...

Go with your heart. Do not take this job. Trust me. If it feels wrong, it probably is. You can make the same pay at a childcare center.

Good luck and keep us posted.

Nanny Sarah said...

As I was reading your post, a HUGE red flag came up when they added more days/hours to the contract along w/more responsibilities. In a nutshell, they initially misrepresented the job to you before you got there. Misrepresentation is a nice word, I would say they lied. It seems they conned you in to coming out there, then changed things once you were there. Maybe they were hoping once you met their adorable children, you would change your mind. This is a tricky tactic and speaks volumes on their character as people in general.
Sure, you could try to negotiate and agree to different terms and maybe they would even agree as well. But the dynamic of your relationship is already flawed based on the fact that they already have deceived you. Even if you agreed to take the job, will you ever completely trust them knowing things started out like this? I wouldn't. First impressions are very important. If had acted on my gut instincts in life, I would have avoided a lot of problems. Act on your instinct and do not accept the job. Sure it sucks being on food stamps, but at least you have your pride and dignity in tact. If you do take the job, not feeling 100% confident...then when things go downhill as they ultimately will, you will not only have to look for a new home, you will have to look for a new job and not able to get a reference from them. + The poor children will miss you too.
Shame on the parents for doing this.

OP said...

OP Here- Even if they gave me everything I asked for, I'm still afraid to sign their contract. It's a 3 year contract and I don't want to be stuck for 3 years in a place where I am unhappy. I do prefer a long term job, and as long as everything was going smoothly, I'm not going to just walk out on their children when a better offer comes my way, but asking for a 3 year commitment after one weekend seems like a lot. Doesn't it? The father is a real smooth talker and I feel like he's constantly wording things to try and make them sound like a benefit to me, when they're really a way for him to cover his own butt. One example is the savings plan he had in mind. The family would keep a percentage of my paycheck in one of their accounts and it would be mine at the end of the contract. If I stayed for 2 months I'd get 10%, 4 months 20% and so on. If I stayed for the entire 3 years, I would actually end up getting collecting a lot of interest, but what if the job went sour after a few months? When he suggested that, I got a really bad feeling. I'd never go for it anyway, but the fact that he even suggested it, rubbed me the wrong way. And there's the relationship with the ex-nanny. The line between employee and friend is way too blurry for me. She drinks with them (sometimes to the point of getting silly), farts in front of them, lays out on the couch like she's right at home. I'm not comfortable with this, and they can't expect me to be their friend. I am a professional nanny and wouldn't think of farting or getting drunk in front of my boss, even in my time off. Of course, a lot of people might like that kind of environment, but it was really weird for me. I know I'm rambling on here, but this is the most detailed contract I have ever seen. It looks like it was actually written by a lawyer and I'd be scared to sign it even if they changed things to my liking. Does a nanny contract really have any legal standing? I keep thinking I should just run for the hills like my gut is telling me too, but then that little part of me keeps going back to the fact that I really really need a job.

BURNT OUT NANNY said...

dont do it, when people nickle and dime you right off the bat it only gets worse! this sounds like my last job that ended in a big mess, you will probally end up working 70 hours a week!

Naomi said...

Go with your gut instinct!!!

cali mom said...

Oh man, a 3 year contract? Knowing that, I'd say just say no. That tells me they either want everything for nothing, or they know that the nanny they hire will be miserable and want to leave soon if not for that dangling carrot of the "savings account". If that was a REAL benefit, it would be IN ADDITION to your pay, or you could opt out of it, like a real 401k or profit/sharing plan, but they just want you to be stuck there. I'd say go with your gut and say no.

boston baby nanny said...

I would try to negotiate with the parents, and write down a clear list of what you want.

-$375 a week
-Set overtime/extra rate for anything outside 40 hours a week
-Set rate for overnights plus sufficient notice
-X amount of notice for extra work
-X amount of notice for guests coming where you will be sharing the bathroom
-Perhaps a trial period of three months with a formal evaluation for both you and the parents after the three months to decide if you want to continue
-Timetable included for raises and evaluations over the course of the three year contract, with raise specifics included

I think you should give the parents a chance to respond to your needs, since there should be some degree of negotiation. And that way if they are unable/unwilling to comply to any of your must-have provisions, then you can walk away knowing that you advocated for yourself and that it truly wasn't the right job for you.

I would insist on a trial period. If nothing else, it gives you a definite escape route if things aren't going well, and if things are tolerable or even going well, it gives you a chance to address any issues and get some feedback from the parents.

Depending on where you live, it seems like $375 a week is reasonable for a live-in position. I live-out and work in Boston and take home about $375 a week once you subtract what I pay for rent and food. And I have no trouble living on that amount, and I also pay my own health insurance and car loan out of that amount. I know that peoples leisure spending and other financial obligations vary, but it is certainly possible. That said, if you are able to live with parents or in some other rent-free or low-rent situation currently, you would probably be better off waiting for a different position where your pay wouldn't be pro-rated because you are living in if you could just as easily live at home and make more in a different position.

As for the family's relationship with their current nanny, I wonder if her behavior or attitude is a small part of the reason why they are looking for someone new, even if that is not the reason that they cite. I am social and friendly with my employers, but I could never imagine being that casual with them, It could be something to do with their relative ages or how long they have been working together, but I highly doubt they would expect or encourage you to act that way, and I don't think they would have a problem with you maintaining a professional relationship with them and maybe a more personal relationship with the children.

So I know that this is getting long, but I think the bottom line is that you should attempt to negotiate and assert yourself in the situation, especially given the dearth of nanny jobs in your area, but if they are not willing to compromise with you, then you can walk away with out any regret and know that it was not the right position for you. I wouldn't write it off without at least giving the parents a chance to respond to your requests, especially if they seemed to like you and would be willing to make some concessions to get you, but don't let them back you into a corner or push you around.

The best thing you can do is give it your best effort to try to make this job work for you, and if it doesn't, then it doesn't and you can thank that parents for the offer but let them know that it just won't work for you.

let's get real said...

DO NOT TAKE THIS JOB!!! There are way too many red flags. I know it is hard to find a job in this economy, but if you take this job you will feel extremely resentful and taken advantage of. These people, as other posters have pointed out, have ALREADY deceived you. They are not trustworthy. They are scheming to get the most out of you that they can while paying you as little as possible.

nannyinMA said...

I was also presented with a really legal and nit-picky nanny contract when I first began my position, and it really scared me. Like it was terrifying. There were so many provisions and crazy stipulations that just seemed so unlikely and bizarre.

Now that I've worked in the position for 10 months, I am starting to realize that parents were just trying to cover every possible scenario and put everything into the contract so that if an issue ever came up it would be covered. The majority of the stuff that was included has not been mentioned and has not been necessarily, but I now understand that they were writing the contract assuming they hired the worst possible lazy terrible bench nanny, and they wanted everything to be up front and on paper in case anything went wrong.

Having read a lot of horror stories on ISYN about nannies without contracts, I am so thankful that they wrote a crazy detailed contract and that I didn't allow myself to be scared off by it. I came into the job thinking it was going to be way more difficult than it actually has been, and most of that is because the contract was so thorough and I thought I would have many more responsibilities than I actually ended up having.

So yeah, take the contract with a grain of salt. Odds are some of it will never come into play.
And if it really seems that unreasonable then just let them know that you appreciated the opportunity to meet with them but that you can't accept the position.

Run, Don't Walk said...

I think you should walk away and not look back. There are too many red flags and if you "negotiate" they may give on a few things but in the end still screw you over. LIve with your parents or a friend until you find something else. Work at McDonalds until you find something else. Don't commit yourself to 3 years when your gut is telling you to run away. You will end up regretting it.

Agreed said...

I agree with those who say try to negotiate with the family. Maybe they are even expecting you to "counteroffer". If they can't compromise, it's not your job. As much as you love nannying, you may need to look into other venues for the time- could you be a substitute teacher? Work at a daycare or an after-school program? Those don't pay so much, either, but you can leave at any time.

Nanny Sarah said...

Wow..a 3 yr contract? 3 YEARS?? Meaning until 2013??? Another red flag just popped up in my head. Please listen to me, the voice of reason. This family deceived you from the get go, the whole relationship you will ever have w/them will be bred out of fraud and deception. I disagree w/any posters who are telling you to negotiate. DO NOT!! This is how things are now...imagine how things will progress in the future.
Do you have to do only Nanny work now? Can you get a childcare job as maybe a daycare asst, etc? Or even cashier at Wal-mart? Anything sounds better than this family.
Bottom line...you can negotiate w/an appliance or car sales person...but a childcare provider???! Shame on this man for trying to nickel and dime his Nanny.

Midwestnanny said...

OMG

Things can change so much in 3 years. I've been with my family for 5 and I LOVE LOVE LOVE them, but if they asked me to sign a three year contract (even after being with them so long), I'm pretty sure I couldn't. You can't control the future . . and since your future in this case, would be living with them for THREE years . . . . I say run.

MissMannah said...

DON'T DO IT!!! I could go into all the reasons not to take this job, but in your heart you already know. Never accept a nanny job unless you are 100% comfortable with all the terms, because you will come to regret it. Since you've been with your family for 5 years, ask them to help you find a job! Parents talk, surely they know someone who needs at least a fill-in babysitter. If you can't get a nanny job lined up by the time your current one ends, go work at McDonald's for the meantime. I'd rather work at a crappy place I know I could easily quit than accept an awful job I won't be able to quit.

To everyone suggesting she re-negotiate: You are all naive. These people are liars and they are not to be trusted.

Night Nanny said...

I don't think I would do it. They got you there under false pretense and then changed things up AFTER they got you emtionally invovled with the kids/family. The pay sounds terribly low, but you don't list your area. I just can't imagine committing to something for that long for such a low amt of pay. Follow your heart...it's telling you to run or you wouldn't be asking us for advice. Please don't sell yourself short. I have found that I make more doing part time work for two families than I would working FT for one. I dont get the pd holidays, vacation days, etc, but I am able to charge a higher rate as a PTer and I can usually work my schedule to work when I want. I love the flexibilty I have as the fill-in nanny as opposed to the FT one. Good luck to you, but don't settle out of fear. Have faith, you're a good nanny with a great track record w/previous family. You'll find a job...no doubt.

FrogBabyNanny said...

I agree with most of the others on this one- DO NOT TAKE THIS JOB! You would follow your gut instinct about a guy, a dangerous situation, a bad friend, etc., wouldn't you? This is 3 YEARS of your life you are talking about here! I would feel very uncomfortable with that alone. Most contracts that I know of are for no real amount of time, knowing that things happen, and to protect both parties. Of course you can stay that long, but for someone to demand it, especially in this type of job where personal relationships are vital, is just wrong.

Not only that, but there were numerous other red flags. They lied to you, straight up. Unfortunately, it is not all that uncommon for employers of live-in nannies to take advantage of their employees and lie to them, and they have already shown they will most likely be that type of employer! You deserve better.

I know it's a tough time, but maybe it's because I live in a very populated area (DC) but I see tons of open jobs. If you are a live-in and clearly not completely opposed to moving, try looking in different cities. Or try joining a nanny agency. You are much more likely to get a job, and most likely a much better job with honest, trust-worthy employers. The agency I work with will place you with a new family if for any reason a family does not work out. Try to find an agency like that- it gives you a much better sense of job security than most nanny positions.

These are not only your employers, but people you are thinking of LIVING WITH. I have been in positions where I do not trust, like, feel respected, etc. by my employers and it was MISERABLE (and I was a live-out!!) Think of yourself and your happiness, and do not settle for less. You WILL find a good job. If it takes a little longer, babysit, walk dogs, substitute teach, work at Target, whatever... until you find what you're looking for. Good luck!!

EX-NANNY said...

I'm not going to defend this nanny or make any remarks as to what she should or should not do. I will say however that she does not represent herself as a professional, nor does she represent the position for what it really is. I will however say that I am EXTREMELY disappointed that as a "professional" nanny that she would talk about the ex-nanny in such a negative way. FYI I do lay on the couch like it is my home because it is...I pay rent there and I am not the current nanny but one that worked for the family for 5 happy years and who happens to rent a room in their home for the time being. As to my behavior, these people are my family, my friends and have been there for me for the past 6 years. I drink in front of them because well hey, I'm 30 years old and if I want to drink with friends I will drink with friends. And if I fart in front of them, well darn it thats my business! (always on accident, come on sometimes we can't control that). During my time as their nanny I was professional, had years of experience and let's just put it out there, alot more educated. Lastly, I went out of my way and cancelled on a good friend to make you feel welcomed and answer all your questions. If you're going to post on a public site, please make sure I don't read it! Again while I am not going to defend the position I will say that you missed out on a great family and we are going to be much better without you!

MissMannah said...

Ex-Nanny, what the heck are you talking about?

EX-NANNY said...

Miss. Mannah, I am the EX-Nanny that OP commented about...enough said!

Village said...

Do not take this job. You will be better off piecing together baby sitting jobs, and you get to keep your soul.

These people will drain you dry. If they are willing to change the deal NOW, what on earth do they have planned for later? I don't think you would ever hear the end of more demands being made on your time.

If you put together several families who needed you at certain times each week, you could make a good living, and still have time to live your own life without the stresses associated with what they are offering, which at the end of the day, isn't much. Listen to your instincts. There are red flags all over this. I think I even hear a siren.

The economy is picking up, especially among the top end. Keep your options open. Your dream job might come along any minute, and you want to be available to take it.

THIS FAMILY SUCKS said...

OP,

Listen: if you are going to re-negotioate (which I would NOT) I would tell them that I want a six month to one year contract and dont' bend on that issue. if they do not respect you enough to understand that YOU need to evaluate THEM then they are not worth your time.

move ON!!!

icalltroll said...

To the ex nanny:

you are a troll.

you are not the ex nanny.

Small World said...

Um... I think the OP's choice of whether or not to take this job has been decided!

If that is really the EX-nanny, I am quite sure she has directed the prospective Employers to this Post!

Wow.

OP said...

OP- whether or not EX-NANNY is actually their ex-nanny, I could care less. I have posted the job exactly as it's described in the contract, so unless the family handed me a ten page contract that means nothing, then I have correctly represented the job. I have no reason to lie, and frankly, I wish the job was the one described to me on the phone. I would have taken it in a heartbeat.I have done nothing wrong. I came here seeking advice. I didn't reveal anything about the identity of the family or thier location. I even went as far as to say what nice people they were. They really were nice, but all the smiles in the world can't make up for sharing my bathroom with god knows who and working an extra day a week for practically nothing. In the end I'm quite relieved I didn't take the job.

get lost, ex-nanny said...

OP:

You are wasting your precious breath stating that you have done nothing wrong; those of us who are not retarded KNOW THIS ALREADY.

don't sweat it, sweetheart. if that is the "ex-nanny" she is as much of a wack-job as the family she works for.

you are too good for them.

good for you! said...

OP
How does it feel to have your pride still intact?

Take a deep breath...

It feels good, doesn't it?

Keep your head up... something will come your way soon. Your personality came through your Post and comments bright, shiny, intelligent and kind.

Katlee85 said...

OP I'm so glad you didn't take the job. AS A MOTHER I would never tell a Nanny one thing on the phone and then write something different in the contract. That is ridiculous and the IDEA of them wanting to hold onto YOUR money and say you only get such and such if you stay this long, is ILLEGAL and bull.

Meh said...

OP,

You made the right decision. I've been there too, about three years back. The family had x expectations during the trial run and then wrote a contract with y. It had so many double-standards.

They got so negative when I turned them down. It was terrible. Here's some words for the future: at will. No contract in this profession can force you to stay if you don't want to. You may lose out on the reference, but that door is open to you the second the parents are there.

world's best nanny said...

Do a 6 month trial period, or however long you want it. See how the expectations play out, see if it is totally unreasonable. I was out of work 8 months at one time, and I borrowed from family, got food stamps,and was depressed as hell. So I know what being unemployed can do to you.
While you're doing the trial period, look for something else just in case it's not what you're looking for.

BB said...

It is your right to make a counter offer and negotiate terms. Take the contract and revise, add, delete or change whatever you feel you need to. No way should you sign a three year contract.

On one hand I would say go with your gut but on the other you are right, jobs are not plentiful in this economy. No matter where you live, rent is usually equal to one or one and a half weeks salary so take that plus any other expenses they may be covering into consideration when figuring out what your true salary is. People often forget to add in perks like paid time off benefits and the like when talking about their weekly pay and it is all part of it.

Yes you can make 300.00 per week in a childcare center, but can you survive on that having to pay rent and all your other bills?

My advice is to be very honest with the parents. tell them you love the kids and the job sounds good but you have some concerns. Remember the ball is really in your court. You can accept the job in the end or not.

MONKEYSHINES said...

family are BUMBOCLOT, DONT DO IT NANNYS FROM THE ISLANDS MAKE MORE THAN THAT!

Phoenix said...

i think the nannies should type their own contracts and have the employers sign them. See how they like being raped in the ass

m&m said...

Uh, guys - it looks like OP already decided NOT to take the job.

Smileybuyer/Anonymous/needed a moniker said...

From Anonymous:

OP
As a lawyer and a former employer of a nanny (who I would Never ask to sign a contract) I am so glad to hear that you didn't take that job. Don't take any job where they make you sign a contract. That's just not part of being a nanny. If you want to have a lawyer draft up a contract to protect your right to get paid (esp. a certain amount at set times with severance if your position is terminated for any reason, etc), that's really not a bad idea. But being a nanny should not turn into indentured servitude, which that contract they wanted you to sign would do. Trust me, that family wasn't going to be nice 2 weeks after you signed, and you would have signed your life away. Think of it this way: they can afford lawyers to go after you, but you can't afford a lawyer to protect yourself!

Smileybuyer

VAnanny said...

Anon: Are you kidding me??? Having a contract is ABSOLUTELY part of being a nanny! It protects both employer and employee! Sorry but your statement is just ignorant!

Euro-nanny said...

OP: Whew, you had a lucky escape! So many things sounded so wrong about that job, especially the 3 year contract...sure at the beginning of a job you need to know where you stand as far as hours, days off, vacation time etc go and some people prefer to put it down on paper rather than keep it verbal, but to be pressured into committing to 3 years is something I've never ever heard of...

The Family said...

Our Ex nanny has just shread this entire thread wipth us and ip would like to start by asking if anyone out there believes there are 2 sides to every story. If you don't, please don't read on. If you do and would like to be objective in understanding the whole story... Feel free to read on and comment.

1) there was no mis representation aboput work schedule and comp. As clearly stated in our ad profile as well as 2 subsequent emails, the job is 5 days a week. watt was shared is that the grand mom was looking to share additional time during the week and due to the conflicts in age and critical eye of a grand mom- we did not want the nanny to be subject to this and therefor where discussing the possibility of going to a 3 or 4 day work week. This was always clearly stated as something we where considering and upon the home visit Wichita we pushed up in time to accommodate the nanny candidates desired schedule so we did not have the luxxury of proactively communicating our final decision on the work schedule. Should anybody wish to challenge this, post your email address and we will gladly send you a link to our enannysource job posting. The compensation was not only consistently stated in writing with the exception of the work schedule and why anybody would apply for an5 day job and presume it to be the same rate if they only worked 4 days is completely beyond me.... But if a person in today's society really feels that way... God luck and let me know, I may want to apply myself.

2) Comp level- if you don't feel everything is relative... Please don't read this one. What the nanny candidate has not shared with you is that she has 0 experience as a live in nanny and we are tired of paying a normal wage for someone who has experience without the experience. As well- the nanny candidate has 4 years of live out nanny experience with on family of which currently makes $330 per week but has to use her own car, her own money for gas and well- her own money for anything that is needed in childcare for the week which according to the candidate is about $100/week.

Oh- and I forgot, her current position also requires cleaning 2 homes - one for each of the parents whom separated over a year ago. Ergo- why we make it a point to include a 10 page contract which clearly defines all areas of the job including all responsibilities which do not include housekeeping of any type and a family credit card for all expenses incurred during the work day.

Sorry, but in e grand scheme of who is bamboozling who, we are completely upfront and proactive in all of our communications unlike where the candidate is coming from.

3) as far as the ex nanny goes- again, two sideds of the story. E exnanny is the exnanny whom posted heed earlier. In addition, she is a member of our family and as such, is staying wi us while she is in between positions. The exnanny was happy and celebrating this weekend with us not only finding a new nanny but also concluding her student teaching position that same week. We did play a game of pool with the ex and candidate nanny the night which was referenced. If nobody here has ever accidentally passed gas while laughing too hard- do not read on... Because that is exactly what happened here. The ex nanny has always been well composed in the 6 years that we have been together and I am offended that anyone would even mention trying to tarnish that with this post.

The Family said...

4) contracts are editable and negotiable. As demonstrated during the review of the contract... We discussed and agreed to change the areas which there was a stated concern. My family and I are elated to know and prove this nanny candidate is completely incapable of communicating properly. She clearly had this problem with her existing family especially with the father and we had already offered advise on how to handle and how she could handle in our family but as a live in... Being able to communicate is not optional- it is a requirement to maintain a positive and harmonious relationship with the family and more importantly- needed for the nanny's peresonal well being. But since the candidate does not have any live in experience, it is clearly still not understood.

So in conclusion- we are sorry to have wasted the time of all those who want to sensationalize half truths and half stories by only knowing one side. We are very happy to have found out the true nature of this candidate prir to employment and are moving on with our new nanny who is delighted and delightful to be a part of our family.

I and my family are not perfect but we do intend ot be the best that we can be in everything we do including raising our children, welcoming a nanny into our lives and her truly being a member of our family and tram as it relates to childcare. We are learning every day from this and all experiences and thank Isawyournanny.com for being a place in which people can properly share appropriate information and thoughts.

Thank you all and have a great day.

The family said...

Oh sorry- forgot about the 3 years- it is a three year because the nanny asked for as long an agreement as we where comfortable with. We want the next nanny toe the last and since thee are no contract cancellation clauses or penalties and the candidate was consistent in saying "as long as the family wants me, 4 to 5 years and I have been with my existing family for 4 years- longer than that if the family will have me" as responses to how long of a commitment do you want to make to your next family.... We thought 3 years was shorter than what was expected. 6 mont h and. Year contracts are not good for anyone but most important- the children. As a live in nanny in a positive environment, leaving after 6 months is devastating and not worth it which is why we interview heavily for candidates who have live in experience.... 2 years is our normal live in contract and again, is not tied to fixed comp levels and has no cancellation clause. So since there are no "Teeth" in the contract we do not understand why even begin to make a big deal of it. But if it was bothersome, it should have been mentioned and could have been adjusted.

Thank you all again.