Job Creep

     This is for all the new nannies out there, and all the kind hearted nannies who just can't say no. I've heard it referred to as "job creep," I also call it the slippery slope.

     I'm sitting here reflecting on my career and thinking, how did I get here? How did this happen? I'm a hard working professional nanny who absolutely adores children, especially my 2 current charges. I've been with them for four years.

     I have a contract. It (basically) states that my sole duties are to watch the children and only the children, also including child related tasks such as kids laundry, kids clean up, kids shopping, etc. And I was perfectly happy with that!

     But when I go to the grocery store to purchase kids snacks and kids meal prep items, how can I say no to also picking up a salad and cheese for my employers? What am I suppose to say, that we should all just go to the store together so that all items for both children and parents can be purchased? That's just silly.

     And when I'm doing kids laundry but the parents have left their items in the washer, am I suppose to just dump all of their clothes on the floor? That seems so rude.

     And when I'm doing the children's dishes and the parents have left just their coffee cup and toast plate in the sink, is it really that hard for me just to wash that too?

     And when I show up for work and the dog is sick on the floor and the children are worried to death and the parents ask me if 'just this once' could I take the sick dog to the vet, what am I suppose to say? "Sure, I'll take Chocolate to the vet if you pay me another $20 for that task because it's not in my contractual job duties." How heartless does that sound?

     But now here I am, 4 years later, responsible for taking Chocolate to the vet for his medication every couple weeks and the groomers. I do the entire family's grocery shopping and hey dry cleaning pick up/drop off is right on the way so might as well do that too, and every other errand that's "just on my way and will only take a minute." I keep the entire household cleaned and organized, from gardeners to construction workers. Not to mention both of my young charges and their health and well being and tutoring and entertainment and extra curricular activities, and the list goes on and on. I show up to work everyday with stick-it notes covering the counter with endless tasks that need to be done. I've dragged my poor charges on errands screaming and crying, all of us with with headaches, because MB and DB had a time sensitive request to get done. Every time I brought it up with MB and DB, it ended in me just wanting to keep the peace between us.

     They use to at least say please and thank for me going out of my way to help them out. They use to acknowledge that I truly was doing a favor for their family, "just this once," but now if I don't get their request completed in a timely manner I get reprimanded for my time management and priorities. (Since when are their children not the number one priority??!?)

     I didn't think to include some of these exactly specific boundaries and instances into my contract. I've been a nanny for nearly 8 years with such considerate employers in the past, I've never encountered such a slippery slope like this before!

     It's too late now, there is no going back. At this point, my only request to my employers was to properly compensate me for the price of a nanny, personal assistant, house manager, and tutor, since I am fully completing each of those tasks. My $15/hour (40 hrs/week in CA) does not compensate me being frazzled, stressed, and burned out from rushing around all day every day. And my poor charges! When I spoke to MB and DB recently again about the issue and a raise would be ideal, they said they'd be willing to consider ways I could 'earn more money'. So they've missed the point entirely from my discussion with them, and I've started seeking new employment elsewhere. I'm wiser now and thought I'd pass on the wisdom. Beware nannies!!

Share your experiences. Email isynblog@gmail.com.

"The Incompetence Astounds Me"

     Why is it so hard to get someone to respond to an ad who fits the qualifications? Only about two percent of those who respond to my ad fit all of the requirements. What makes a nanny think she can negotiate her way past some of these critical requirements?

Amelia Bedelia

My Ad:
American nanny, with social security card and ability to work in the Unites States needed by family of five for one year minimum commitment. Must drive and have a US driver's licence. Must be height and weight proportionate and fit enough to chase after young children, play soccer and take long walks. A strong swimmer is essential. *For clarification this means that you can swim multiple strokes and swim in deep or shallow water. This means you can tread water for at least five minutes. 
We are seeking a nanny free of psychological or mood disorders. We want someone who is happy. Please be someone who smiles and greets people in the morning with a positive and cheery voice. Please be educated beyond high school, minimum 2 years. Your religious, sexual and political affiliation is not relevant to us, please don't try to make it so. Please be familiar with basic tenants of child development and open to understand our parenting philosophy. We do not punish our children, nor do we bribe them or reward them. We do not do time outs. We see everything as a teaching moments. We do not yell, threaten or coerce. If this is too "sappy" or "crunch" for you, then we are not the family for you. We will be paying you on the books, on a weekly basis. We pay above the market rate and based on your experience.  We prefer a live-out nanny but if you are exceptional and need a live in position, we can make that work. We require a minimum of three childcare references, two personal references and two family references. If you smoke cigarettes, do not reply to this ad. If we hire you and find out that you smoke, you will be immediately and unapologetically terminated. International travel is required for approximately 30 days per calendar year. (3-4 trips of 6-10 days).
Clean criminal background is essential. 

      How could I be more clear? No, really. HOW COULD I BE MORE CLEAR?

Adding Elder Care to Nanny's Job

Here's our situation. Nanny of 11 months, cares for one school aged and one 15 month old. Nanny live out and works 7-6, M-F. Her year agreement ends next month. Meanwhile, my mother had a stroke 8 weeks ago and we are moving her here to live with us. We don't want two care providers in the house. Our current nanny makes $650 per week.

Stacey Torres

We had been in the process of renovations which included a game room off the garage. We are turning the game room into a mother in law style suite with bathroom, cupboards, microwave, sink, refrigerator. The bathroom is being modified for handicapped usage. These modifications will be completed June 30. My mother may arrive in advance of this due to discharge from her rehab facility. She will continue in home PT once she arrives here.

We would like to continue the job description as is with regard to the nanny, with a few modifications. We would like the nanny to stand by/assist bathe my mother during the 15 month old's naps. We would also like her to do her laundry and prepare her breakfast and lunch. The nanny curently makes dinner for the whole family, so I don't see increasing the portion size as being extra tasking. We were thinking of offering the job to our current nanny first at a rate of $825 per week, to go to $900 after one month of making this work. If she is not interested, we were going to advertise the position at $700-850 DOE. Does this sound fair?

Question about what to offer? Email isynblog@gmail.com.

Changes

     

      I'm really upset right now. I have been working as a nanny for 3 years, 3 months for the same family. In the Fall, both of the children will be in school full time. My boss sent me an email detailing a revised job offer, effective the week of Labor Day. The language in it was so business like, there was no warmth of personal effect.
     She said that in essence, their needs will be changing. This is what they are looking for. All this time, I have been a full charge nanny for two children, working from 7-6 M, Friday, finally making $825. a week, cash, not even on the books. This isn't high for my area, it is average to low. I live out.
     What my boss wants now:
      Hours, 7-8 AM & 3-8PM.
      During that time, there will be four hours available for child housekeeping tasks, that you can do as it fits with your schedule.
     Hours 3-8 will consist of driving to activities, preparing dinner for the family, homework assistance and post dinner clean up. "The dishwasher may be ran and emptied the following morning, but on Fridays, all dishes will need to be cleaned and put away before you leave".
     During the 7-8 hours, I am to help the kids get breakfast, make their beds and start a load of laundry per day, towels or children's clothes "with the goal being that no laundry will remain for the weekend".
     She didn't even say THANK you for all I have done for the family. She said she "hopes I will stay on for the summer at full salary." Why wouldn't it be??  The insult to this job, which takes me 1/2 hour to commute to is that in addition to working two hours later, my salary is going down to $675 per week.
     Has anyone ever been through this before? I feel totally taken advantage of. All these years, I have gone above and beyond my job description, always. I've never taken a single vacation day that didn't align with their vacation plans and I've taken a total of three sick days. I've never been late.

 Talk it through with ISYN. Email isynblog@gmail.com.

Nanny or Personal Assistant?

Hi, I have been working as a nanny for almost 5 years. I know a few personal assistants in the area and they do basically the same job I do, but get paid at least $5/hour more. My charges are now in school for the better part of the day and old enough that they don't need "nanny care" but they do need someone to keep their lives organized, get them to activities, etc. I am writing because I wanted to propose this to my boss in a way that proves beneficial to her. This is the note she left me today. She's a good employer. I think I could make her life easier. My hours now are from 7-6, M-F. I get the kids off to school and then I have one home at 1230 and two home at 3 & 330.  Has anyone ever made the bridge before? I am enclosing today's note because I think it shows that she would be receptive to it. I just want to make sure to politely articulate the pay difference. $16 an hour now and I would like to make at least $22.