Nanny Wonders What Her Rave Review Was Based on...

     I have been working for this family for three months. I have a nanny contract. We recently had a meeting where the parents told me that I had "exceded their expectations". They in return asked me how I liked things. I said that I loved the kids and planning days with them and spending time with them but I felt that some of the things addressed in the nanny contract were not correct. The husband grimaced. The wife looked uncomfortable. There were more than a few things, for example I am always on time. One time I was five minutes late and as a result, she missed her train and was 40 minutes late to a meeting. She impressed that on me for assertively. However, my hours go until 7:00 pm. That is what I am paid for in my weekly salary. At least twice a week, they are late, usually by only ten or fifteen minutes. When I brought it up in the meeting the husband said, "so what's the problem, you can see the next movie". He clearly didn't equate the importance of my time with his. The wife got the importance of holding her coworkers up at the meeting, but what of my friends waiting for me at the movie? I wavered on this and asked if they could at least call and let me know if they had gotten on a later train. The husband looked severely annoyed. The wife agreed.
     The next thing is the housekeeping and personal assistant tasks that it is assumed I will take on. When I brought this up, they both looked at me with a blank stare. The husband said, "this sounds like girl talk" and excused himself.
      It was easier to talk to my boss, who after her husband left again said how happy she was that I chose their family. I told her that we agreed on specific hours and tasks at a set salary. I suggested that we should consider time for going over seven PM as well as the cost for tasks she would like me to do, tasks I could decide if I wanted to do, based on the pay. She then said, "so if I ask you to clean the downstairs bathroom for $5 a day on a daily basis because ___ is potty training, and you don't want to, who is going to do it for $5?" I said, "well that is kind of the point. If you want extra work done, you can have someone else come in and do it".
     With this, she got exasperated with me and stood up. She said, "why don't you do this. Why don't you make a list of the jobs that we have asked you to do that you didn't agree to and let me know how much each job is worth it to you. I don't know what else to tell you". And she just left me sitting there like a complete moron.
      Has anyone ever been in this situation?
      The list of things would include vacuuming the downstairs, mopping the kitchen floor (not mopping up a spill, but mopping the whole flour), washing bedding from each of the family beds once per week and remaking them, washing, drying, ironing and folding the children's clothes, dropping her husband's shirts at the drycleaners and picking them up, emptying the dishwasher which is left STUFFED full every monday morning, washing pots and pans left in the sink ANYTIME they cook, they leave their pans "soaking" and sweeping the front porch. To be honest with you, I would rather not do any of this.
     This meeting took place last Friday and no one has said a word since. I have continued to do the things they asked of me as listed above. What do I do now? *Also, I feel both parents have been cold to me. Is it possible my rave review was only based on the stuff I was doing that was extra and doing it for nothing? Is it possible to assign a fair dollar amount to these tasks?


Leanne Allen said...

Yikes. You are a nanny, not a personal assistant. Plain and simple, if they want housework done, you need to be paid more. Both parents are immature. I wouldn't put up with them disrespecting you. If they wont honor the extra money, dont do the housework or find another family. I have a contract as well, im not required to clean at all but i do as a common courtesy and my boss always give me extra for it. I feel bad u r in that situation.

Anonymous said...

You are caring for kids and kid related chores... Isnt that what you were hired to do? I will bring the contract up and if there are chores listed-tell them this is what is on the contract. If more chores need to be done-it will more money out of pocket for them.. Whats 5 minutes? Was there an accident or something-something you probably didn't know was gonna happen. Your only human!! Yes, stuff happens. I do like to go above and beyond... But only when child is napping. I get as much as I can done.

unicornnanny said...

Ask for the rate a house cleaner would charge- 150-250 extra per week with a little discount. Or they can hire a cleaner. Say it like this: "if you hired a housekeeper, it would cost x amount. I will do it for y amount which saves you z amount. Or you can hire a professional cleaning service and pay x amount to them." As far as them being late, tell them they need to text you if they will be late and you will charge hourly for any time they are late or they can increase your hours and salary accordingly and you will always be there until that time.

Anonymous said...

You are kind of being stupid. She asked you to name your price. So name a high price. And if they say no, then stop doing those tasks.

Me! said...

No way! They want a housekeeper not a nanny! I wouldn't do ANY of what they asked you to do! She flat out said that that was the point! They DONT want to pay to get deep cleaning done! They expect you to do it! What jerks! The husband by the way wins the jerk award! Rude and disrespectful! The late thing would be solved if you made them pay you hourly PLUS overtime for anything over forty hours as is the law! Salary pay NEVER benefits the nanny. Always ask to be hourly with a clause that says they will pay if they cancel a scheduled dat=y and or go on vacation! Tell them you do not want to clean. You're a NANNY not a MAID (nothing wrong with maids) it's just not your job!

this_nick said...


Get out before you get any more attached to these people's kids, and they to you. I am deadly serious. They want you as a housekeeper at no extra charge, working overtime for no additional pay, and have no respect for your time and plans. What they loved about you was that you were taking these abuses without complaint, and once you had the nerve to actually question things, they turned on you.

Apply for other jobs immediately, and get out as fast as you can. If one of the parents was reasonable and fair it might be salvageable, but the fact both resented you pointing out the problem isn't just a red flag -- it's a box full of them.

Find an alternate position as soon as possible, with a contract that includes stipulations for overtime pay and fees for extra work. Good luck!

Angi said...

You are the nanny, not the housekeeper, plain and simple. I cant TELL you how many parents think they can get both careers jn one person and convinced they dont have to pay for both careers. My BIGGEST pet peeve when looking for employment.

Alice said...

What this_nick said!

Get out while you still can. The husband is a rude, arrogant asshole. He shouldn't be allowed to raise children, based on those statements. Girl talk? I hope he doesn't have any GIRLS.

I'd tack on an extra $5 per hour for all the things you're doing for them. :)

And then renegotiate your contract to be an HOURLY employee, and state that hours over 40 will be paid OVERTIME, and yes EVEN 5-15 MINUTES WILL BE CHARGED BY THE HOUR.

Good luck with this. :(

Anonymous said...

these people sound like douche bags.

Anonymous said...

I don't really understand why you started doing things that were not in your contract.