Thursday

Bringing Baby

OPINION
I have been a full time nanny for five years. Before becoming a nanny, I worked as a teacher for 5 years. I have a BS in special education and am certified. I burned out in the classroom and have loved working as a nanny. I got married two years ago and am eager to start a family of my own. I would love to be stay at home mom but we just can't swing it financially. I'm curious how other career nannies have handled getting pregnant and how things worked out. I would like to bring my baby to work but am unsure that would work with my current family. How hard would it be to find a job I can bring my baby to work with? Thanks.

40 comments:

knittynanny said...

Have you thought about watching a couple kids in your home? That way you can make extra money and be able to take care of your baby and have quality thine with him/her as well.

ma nanny said...

I have had great success bringing my baby to my nanny job- it's been wonderful for everyone! However, I've been with then a few years before baby.

mommy to be said...

Same boat, here! I'm just going to watch 2 or 3 kids at my house. With great references and exp as a nanny, I will ask $150/wk per kid. I'll have to budget a lil more than before, but I figure with what I save on gas, that will help. I can't imagine packing up a newborn every day to go to work! No way...

Op said...

Op here
I live in a small condo, which will be another issue, so keeping kids at my home wont work.

♥ Amy Darling ♥ said...

OP, I was going to say the same thing...that you should watch kids in your home or even get licensed to care for other children. But I understand you live in a condo, so that might not be a good option.

Bringing along your baby to a Nanny job won't be easy, I think. I mean, when if the baby keeps you up all night long and you are too tired to go to work the next day? Of if your baby gets sick and the family doesn't want to expose their child(ren)? These are things that you should consider.

However, if you find a family who agrees and lets you bring your baby, consider it a HUGE perk since you won't have to pay for childcare and expect to be paid slightly lower than before you had a baby.

I hope you find the right fit whether it be w/your current family or another.

Congratulations on your new baby!! ♥ ♥

♥ Amy Darling ♥ said...

Oops...I just re-read your post and thought you were already preggers. Sorry OP.

Or you can consider it a very early congrats.

LOL.

Rhiannon said...

Well, since you aren't pregnant yet, could you discuss your plans with the family you work for and see how they feel about it? Be sure they understand that you aren't actually pregnant yet. You don't want them to freak out and start looking for someone new.

If they are okay with the idea, then go from there. If they aren't, then keep them up to date with your plans and after your maternity leave, try to find a family with a baby around the same age.

I thought my nannying career would be over when I had my daughter, but her pediatrician said that the ideal would be to find a family with another baby. Less exposure to illnesses from schools that way! (Amy Darling, the newborn would be far more at risk than the older children, the real question is whether the family would let you know when their child was sick in order to keep your own baby safe). The family I was with when I became pregnant sent out my info on all of their forums with preschools and mom groups and I had an ad on Care.com. I found two part time families. One little boy is 5 1/2 months older than my daughter and the other is one month younger. The little boy who is younger has truly become my daughter's best friend! The older boy adores her! It is tricky packing up a newborn, but both families allow me to leave things at their homes if I need or want to. She is 16 months old now and the experience has been so rewarding for everyone!

As for rates, I get paid $2.00 less per hour than my typical rate. Not too bad considering I know she is always getting the very best care for less than I would pay for a cheap daycare.

Nanny321 said...

I am a nanny- My last job only lasted 5 months because I was hired on temporarily to provide "maternity leave" for their regular nanny.
Their regular nanny had been with them for 2 years prior to getting pregnant. While she got pregnant unexpectedly, the family agreed to let her have a "maternity leave" (unpaid) and held her nanny position for her. She worked up until she was 9 months pregnant then took 4 months off work.
Now, the family lets her bring her baby to work on most days. (If they have a big event in the kids schedule, the nanny arranges for the baby to be watched elsewhere.)
I am still in contact with this nanny/family, the only problem they have is the baby's schedule does NOT match up with the kids she's watching. Her baby is almost a year old and like most babies has a strict eating/napping schedule, while her charges are now 3 and 5. Thus, her charges schedules and/or the baby's schedule gets uprooted from time to time so that everyone can be accommodated. I know that when the baby has a bad day, everyone has a bad day from listening to him cry all day. And I know she has to be really strict with her charges while playing at the park because if the kids take off running, there's no way nanny can chase after them with a baby!
Overall, the nanny and the family seems content with the situation!
Good luck OP!

Bethany said...

I don't have direct experience with this, but I know in my area nannies tend to get paid less when they bring their child with them.

Of course that might be a fair trade off for you, a little lower rate, but you don't have to pay for childcare and you know your child will be safe.

ericsmom said...

The area where I live most people don't like that idea. When my son was little I applied for jobs. I even asked if I could bring my child and would take less pay. Alot of families told me they rather pay for a nanny just for their child.

Also, be careful. Some parents say its okay in the beginning. But will freak out if they see that their kids schedule may have gone out of whack that day because of your baby. Trust me it happened to me in the past. I would say give it a try, but be prepared for back-up care as well.

Also, why not work in a daycare? Alot of daycare centers will let you bring your child. You may get paid a little less. But it may work out better than working for one family

Good luck

WashingtonNanny said...

I've been a nanny for 7 years. The first 5 years it was just my hubby and I. After that we had A baby. I had been with my family for 5 years. They allowed me to continue working for them with my daughter but made me take a TWO HUNDRED DOLLAR cut a week. I stayed with them for almost a year after that and then they decided they didn't need a ft nanny anymore as all their kids were in school. They told me on February that they wouldn't need me in September - lots of notice. I began looking for a job immediately. It was VERY difficult to find a new job with my daughter. I have a degree in ECE, tons of experience, and lots of stellar references. Long story short - I found a job and am working full time but not making nearly as much money as a couple years ago.

TakeAYearOff said...

I was a nanny for a family of three: age 7, 3 and a three month old. My son was also three months. The job was less than a mile from our home! I loved it until mom apparently brough RSV home,(babies were about 6 months) on her clothes (nurse working on a floor or infants with rsv...little did I know. I never thought to ask. I was just told she was a ped nurse). My son got rsv and nearly died, literally. He turned gray, went limp and had to be revived by the team of emergency transport specialists. He was in the hosp for several weeks. As a mom, Id change working so soon after birth. I didn't need the income, I'm just active and get bored easily. You can find familes that would love a mom bc she's experienced and it makes some feel more comfortable. But please wait until baby is big and strong first! Or, do in home child care. Either way, have every possible senario covered in a contract.

WashingtonNanny said...

I also wanted to say my job is amazing - my daughter and the nanny kiddo are BFF''s and it's TOTALLY worth it. :-)

Fiona said...

I don't mean to sound harsh, and obviously it's your choice, but maybe hold off on having a baby for another year or two. Maybe then you'll have more options financially.

It's been my experience that parents aren't thrilled with the idea of a nanny bringing her child especially an infant.

Ifants tend to rule the world during the first year or so of life, so if your baby doesn't schedule easy that would impact your charge's day. Many families don't take kindly to having their schedules interupted.

Also, these jobs don't always pay well, so it may not be a huge financial benefit to you.

Have you considered daycare? Many places have spots set aside for employee's children. There is also the benefit of health insurance and the benefit that your employer won't tire of having to make baby accomodations for you.

As for your current family, you know them best. Think about the position and what they have asked you to do and think of how that will fit with a newborn. Mind you most newborns do not sleep peacfully during the day and comply with whatever needs to happen. If you can see it fitting, go ahead and discuss it with them.

Since you've been with them a bit they might be more understand and willing to accomodate a nanny they know and like.

Fiona said...

Good luck in whatever you choose!

Phoenix said...

maybe you should wait to have a baby for a bit. You may be able to move into a small house or something.

don't be a weirdo and have a kid before you are ready. That will not be good for you, hubby, or baby.

Sadly, if you were my nanny and you got pregnant. I would probably replace you. you don't know what is going to happen and I wouldn't want someone watching my kid if they have their own. Why? if the situation arose you would save your kid before saving mine. That is maternal instinct. If you have just my baby with you, then you will save my baby.

Now, if you worked out of your home and everyone knew you were providing home daycare and they knew you had your own child then they are actively putting their child in your care.

The best thing to do would be to work out of the home. or don't have a kid for a while if its going to hurt you financially. Maybe you should save up $20k before you have it

Bethany said...

I don't know if this has been suggested, but since you have the credentials maybe you could take in 1 or 2 kids in your home.

You could probably find a family or two willing to pay a good amount and willing to drop off at your place knowing their child is getting a care by a professional in an environment with better ratios that daycare.

You also wouldn't need to pack your baby up every day.

speakingofweirdo said...

Phoenix, what paranoia. What situation do you think would occur where you have to sacrafice one childs life for another? So you're only going to have one child?

MissMannah said...

I'm really glad this question is here, because I'm in the same position of trying to get pregnant. Though we are not sure yet if I am going to continue working or stay at home. Those of you who have been there, when did you tell the parents that you were pregnant? Also, did the parents want to know immediately what your plans for childcare were? OP, I would love for you to come back with your insights on how you plan on handling this also.

nycmom said...

I have not had a great experience with a nanny bringing a newborn. I have worked with a past caregiver to make this work, but found it inevitably led to conflicts no matter how flexible I tried to be. In my case the nanny's baby was a few years younger than my kids so I think that was a big factor. I think it might work if you worked for a family with a baby of similar age.

I am very flexible with my prior and current nanny in allowing them to bring their elementary-aged child to work as needed. It isn't always ideal and I do think, no matter how hard a nanny tries, that her child will receive subtle favoritism (as per normal maternal instincts). But I recognize that my nanny is a mom too and would much rather enable her to be a good mother who can be with her child when needed than force separations. The only issue that arises is illness because it is hard to encourage a nanny to bring her sick child to our home if none of us are sick. But I have tried to help there too and use the same safety precautions I would with my child.

I would not hire a nanny with a newborn again or try to make that work since my kids are older. But I think you could find a family willing to view it as a nanny share. In that case, I would assume you were paying 1/2 the going rate for a nanny share and I was paying the other half. So I would estimate your salary would be 2/3 normal. GL.

ericsmom said...

Good points. Also, thinking what about the newborn sleeping arrangements. Can you really expect the employers to keep a crib around for your child? What about a bouncer or swing, highchair. Would the house already be child proof. Would they be willing to let you put up baby gates. Or put socket protectors in their outlets. Those things are a pain in the neck.

COnanny said...

I am a nanny but also the mom of a 3 year-old whom I bring to work with me.
After she was born, I took a 2 month maternity leave, using vacation time, sick days, taking advantage of a short-term disability insurance claim and some unpaid time off. When it was time to go back to work (since money ran out), I cared for two infants (at different times) whom were the same age as my own child. It was not paying as much as my job as a nanny but I was able to stay home with my baby, save on gas and child care (not close family in my area).
After a year, I started looking for jobs as a nanny. I started a bit lower than I was hoping but it was still the average rate in my area. I only accepted a job that would allow me to bring my child.
Now, my "baby" is three years old and I still bring her to work with me. I work for two families, each loving that I bring her along. Both of my families had no hesitation in hiring me after the initial interview (they each offered me the job the next day after the interview) despite the fact that I bring my child to work. In fact, the first one (with them for two years now) has a child of the same age as mine and now they call each other best friends! The latest one liked the idea of a "big sister" for their infant daughter.
I never had a problem bringing her to work with me. I treat each child equally while I am at work. I also do not "cut" my rates because of the situation (I am currently being paid above market rate with both families).
I do bring my own daughter's meals and necessities (diapers, wipes....) and each of my families had placed a pack and play in a room for my daughter to nap, when she was younger (my first family had it at all time in their own master bedroom and never removed it until she was big enough to use a big bed!). She is now using a regular bed in a spare room.
I love bringing her to work with me and my families love that I bring her to work with me :)

COnanny said...

I should add that I believe that my families and are so happy about the situation because my child is the same age or older than all the kids I care for. It may not have been the same if my daughter had been younger (by more than just a few month, I mean). The reason being that a younger child obviously needs more care than a older one. So, if my own child had been younger, I would have had to care for her more than the children whom I hired to care for, which defeat the purpose of hiring a nanny in the first place.
For example: I would have not been able to do some activities with my charges because my own child would need a nap.
Does that make sense?

♥ Amy Darling ♥ said...

I see childcare ads that state a Nanny may bring along a child w/her to help socialize another child, however it is extremely rare that other families allow a newborn infant to come along. They usually prefer someone w/a toddler who can play along w/another child similar in age.

Zzmom said...

I interviewed a few nannies who wanted to bring their child along and really liked them but most of them wanted to charge close to the same amount as those without kids. I thought of it almost like a nanny share, albeit a bit more convenient for me. With one kid we were paying in the neighborhood of $15-16/hr so I thought 8-10/hr was fair for a nanny who brought her child but most wanted 12-14...which wasn't worth it to me.

Zzmom said...

I interviewed a few nannies who wanted to bring their child along and really liked them but most of them wanted to charge close to the same amount as those without kids. I thought of it almost like a nanny share, albeit a bit more convenient for me. With one kid we were paying in the neighborhood of $15-16/hr so I thought 8-10/hr was fair for a nanny who brought her child but most wanted 12-14...which wasn't worth it to me.

Phoenix said...

speakingofweirdo

I am not a biological mother, nor will i ever be.

So lets say there is a house fire. Bith kids are on opposite sides of the house. The mom would automaticaly take her baby out of danget (if she could) then she would go back for the second child.

Or lets say the nanny is outside playing with the kids. And she would choose to make her baby happy before mine. A mother would show favoritsm towards, And if the mom didn't put her child first, then something is off

Phoenix said...

***wow guys, sorry for all the mispelled words. I'm just now waking up and trying to get going***

No said...

In my concern to raise a kind unselfish child, I would intentionally not put my child first.

firefirefirefire said...

Phoenix, actually that's a false assuption. As a mother, I would cater to the other child at times to show my child that the world doesn't revolve around them. A house fire where one child has to die? And the nanny has to choose? Lol not going to happen. Unless its a Lifetime movie. Serious question, were you born a male? Is that why you'll never be a natural mother?

ericsmom said...

CONanny

Great story!! Really great you found nice families to work for. But lets be realistic those positions are hard to find. Most families are still going to to choose a nanny that doesn't have the extra baggage.

COnanny said...

Thank you ericsmom, but I definitely do not consider my little girl an "extra baggage", nor do my families. I would rather call her a Bonus for a family open to the idea ;)
I do understand that not everyone is comfortable with it, and that is fine.
It was indeed hard to find a good position that would fit my child and me, but I do think that everything happens for a reason and after searching for a while I am very happy to have found my current MBs and DBs and their children.

BringingBaby said...

Id personally prefer a nanny who brings a child similar to the age of my child. Id feel like they understand the deep love mother & child share & that they would be more careful bc their child is there, too. That might not make any sense, a lot of reasons why we choose or don't choose nannies don't make sense.

However, I wouldn't be comfortable with a newborn. I think mom would be exhausted from night feedings. And a newborn takes ALL of your time. You don't understand it until you're a mom, but when you have a newborn, you're doing something baby related every 3-10 minutes, all day, day after day. The other situation where I wouldn't be okay with it would be if the ages and genders didn't make a good mix. Example, I wouldn want a nanny bringing a twelve year old boy if I have two kids under four. I think her child would be bored. A girl on the other hand might enjoy playing with the babies.

leftcoastmama said...

I have not, nor would I ever hire a nanny that wanted to bring her child.


I do wish you the best for your soon to be expanded family and job search.

Just My Two Cents Just Now said...

I read a lot of childcare ads, and have never seen one saying it was okay to bring along an infant.

Usually people say it is okay to bring a toddler or older child so their own child can socialize w/a playmate.

I think you should wait until your baby is a little older before you work as a Nanny. Either that, or put him or her into a daycare that specializes in infants.

silent aspirations said...

I'm currently in this situation. I'm 20 weeks pregnant with my first and will be starting with a new family after 6 weeks maternity leave. (My current family had already planned on putting their daughter in all day K before I got pregnant.) The agency I work with assures me they will do everything they can to find me a position and I will be temping with them between September and birth. Hopefully after my leave as well if I don't have a position by then. My midwife also said she knows of several moms who bring their baby to their nanny position. Maybe in my area, Twin Cities of MN, this is more common?

ericsmom said...

Yes, I apologize wrong use of words "baggage". Honestly, I think if you can find a position that is open to bring your child thats great. Just don't get your hopes up.

diet dr. pepper said...

I wouldn't consider a nanny who wanted to bring her own child to work.

For the same reason I wouldn't consider a home daycare run by a SAHM.

In both cases it is human nature for the nanny/SAHM to prioritize her own child's needs. If she doesn't she is a sub-par mother.

seriously said...

That's a myyth that a parent will "prioritize" their own childs needs. I've been a nanny, bringing my daughter as well as ran a home child care for many years. That mythical situation never arose. Had two kids needed something, Id definately cater to the child care kid first, as most mothers do, for obvious reasons. That's natural and what really happens. But that's not a realistic situation anyway.

EBlack said...

The woman who takes care of my little boy 6 hours a week always has her son with her. They're best friends now. I don't pay her any less because of it. I'm not looking for my son to get 100% of her attention all the time - I just want him to be safe and happy and have fun. So for me, her little boy being there is a plus, not a minus.