The Princess

     Let me start by saying I have been a professional nanny for over 10 years. I have worked for high profile and celebrity families. I am now in a new situation and I don't know how to go forward with it.
     Again, I find myself working with someone with big $. A former celebrity type. Young wife. They have a son who is five and a daughter who is 2. I am the nanny for the 2 year old.
      I know it is normal to call a little girl, Princess but these people say it like they mean it. They are raising her on purpose to be nasty and judgmental. I take her to a playgroup on Monday mornings. It is a drop in 2 hour playgroup. I leave her and go run errands. She always comes home with a note. The notes say things like, "1 diaper change, ate cheerios and apple juice and refused to share toys."
      I know she's two. But this family doesn't believe in teaching her to share. The father HIGH FIVED her with that note. They have let me in more on their parent strategy since working and I don't agree with it. I know I don't have to agree with it. I know I am the nanny. Thank you for that.
     When it comes to breakfast and lunch, I have to ask her what she wants for her meals. It's totally okay that she says "waffles" and I make her waffles with syrup and butter and she says, "no waffles with peanut butter" and then I make waffles with peanut butter and she says "just yogurt." I seriously make 3-5 breakfasts and 2-3 lunches. It is even harder because Mom and Dad are basically always around. They do what they do. "Consult" but they are always present.
     The little girl told me "Cut strawberries for me" and I said, "I'll cut strawberries for you, can you ask nicely?". Her mom says, "You don't get what you want in this world by asking nicely.".
     Since the parents are often around, it is hard for me to do things like give the 2 year old a nap. She gets tired and then over tired. Her parents tell me, "when she's tired, SHE will let you know". I feel like this 2 year old girl is my boss.
     I've gone places with both children, the other nanny and the parents and I am totally skeeved by what I see. The other nanny and I got in line with the kids to get on a carousel. The line wasn't that long, but there were about 30 people ahead of us. The father walks ahead of everyone, talks to the ticket operator and then waves us ahead. Everyone was giving me dirty looks. I wanted to apologize to the people as I passed them and their kids.
    The Mrs. caught me apologizing before for the 2 year old at Whole Foods. She said, "what are you apologizing for?" and "don't ever apologize for my child. That's one way to meet your maker.".
    I am a live-in nanny. Both parents are completely intimidating. I just want to sneak out in the middle of the night but my bedroom is up on the third floor. I wish I hadn't moved in with all of my stuff. I feel totally trapped. I don't mean this as a figure of speech. I mean I feel trapped. Help.

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Jmaria said...

"That's one way to meet your maker."???? WTF? I would have not so kindly informed her that if she said anything like that again, I would go to the police. Actually, you could have used that as an out. Should have filed a complaint with the police and moved out immediately.

Just get out of there. These people are horrific.

AbsOfSteel said...

It sounds terrible, and I've known families like that. The sad truth is, you're not going to change them. That's how they live their life, and that's how they plan to raise their children... basically, either get on board, or find a new job.

Angi said...

Leave! You are on self indulgent, self centered and entitlement hell! Don't compromise yourself for this asshole of a family. Good grief! I feel for those kids

Angi said...

I also suggest bringing someone with you to move out. A social worker, lawyer, cop, someone of authority.

CleaverJune said...

I agree with each and every person who commented before me.
This is not indicative of anything remotely close to a good or healthy work relationship. They are who they are and you aren't going to be able to do anything to change that. I suggest you look IMMEDIATELY for another position. If you can, I would move out. Move to a friends, etc if possible to get out faster- but if not possible, I would be interviewing during any non-working moment. I would NOT give notice until you have secured a new position. It's obvious that they will be booting you out as soon as you say you are leaving in two weeks, etc.

Definitely do as Angi suggested, and have someone present while you move out. Ideally you can get a person of "authority," but if not, a professional looking individual that video tapes EVERYTHING should suffice.

I hope that you find a new position quickly.

Stephanie said...

Nope ! Definitely would have to get someone to come get me!!

this_nick said...

What everybody else said. And don't let these people intimidate you. Remember it's just some has-been and his trophy wife. You, on the other hand, are a capable professional.

Though if you want someone to ghostwrite a tell-all, I'm game. ;)

Gah! said...

These guys are crazy! Leave asap! Get someone to help you if you're afraid. Ridiculous wanna be celebrities!