Tuesday

She's so had it with Jamaican Nannies

Received Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Perspective and Opinion on ISYN I realize Jamaican nannies and their shortcoming are discussed and defended here frequently and I wanted to share my personal experience. I have worked for the same Greenwich family for nearly 6 years.

When I was first hired it was to replace a Jamaican nanny who had crashed the car while the children were in it, could not swim, and could not travel with the family due to green card issues. The first couple of years there I worked with a Jamaican nanny who came every evening at dinner time to help out with dinner and help me give the kids a bath while the parents enjoyed some private time. She would show up everyday with her own five year old daughter in tow, and create total chaos. My boss and I, who is a wonderful stay at home mom and very hands on but used a nanny to make sure her four children were taken care of while she attended to her many charitable commitments, would get the kids settled in to dinner. My boss would be slaving away at the stove to prepare a "special" dinner for the Jamaican employee because things like Tortellini Alfredo were not up to her taste so my boss would be frying up rice and cooking up chicken, a different homemade meal every day of the week for her employee. Said employee came late almost everyday and would enter the house screeching and singing and completely rile the kids up when they had just gotten settled. Her and her daughter would sit and be catered to by my boss and I. The nanny and her child savagely chomped away at her gourmet meal, spewing food all over the place. After my finished eating, my boss and I cleaned everything up. Then, the Jamaican nanny and I would would take the kids upstairs for a bath, where the Jamaican nanny would usually throw her daughter in the mix. When I say into the mix, I mean in to the tub.

On my employer's datenight, the second they drove off, the Jamaican nanny would rush out to her car and bring in huge loads of laundry to do while my employers was out. She overloaded the machine time and time again in an effort to get her laundry done for free. Then she would take a bag and go grocery shopping in my bosses pantry, which was completely overstocked. She would select rice mixes, snacks, pasta and sauces and then help herself to whatever she thought wouldn't be missed from the refrigerator. She shopped for her child's school clothes in my charges closets. I complained adamantly about this woman. When it was summer and I took the kids swimming, she (of course not a swimmer) would sit on the side of the pool in a chaise lounge downing Budweiser while asking me to teach her daughter to swim. As I was the only one watching five kids it was quite hard to do. At Christmas and birthday times, she would bring me a catalog of stuff she had circled in red ink and instruct me to give it to my boss. She also gave my boss a wish list for her, her kids and extended family. Eventually even my big hearted boss got fed up and gave her the boot.

Since then I have dealt with another Jamaican nanny. She was the weekend nanny. She came on Friday nights and stayed through until Sunday morning. A very sweet girl but very needy and a crook. She never did anything with the kids. Never took them anywhere. She would WATCH them play outside but never played with them. Again, a non swimmer so she could never take them swimming. She would watch TV with them all day and all night. The entire time she was there she would either have her cell phone glued to her ear, or, later as technology advanced, the ear piece attached to her ear. She talked on the phone ALL THE TIME. When she came on Friday night my boss would order dinner for her and the kids and again, on Saturday night, so she did not cook at all. She constantly asks my boss for money, never pays any of it back. She also has my boss buying gifts for everyone from her daughter to her sister to her sister's kids and mother. It just goes on and on. She has not been to work in over a year but my boss continues to pay her because she is always crying that she needs money and can't find a job. When her daughter got accepted to college, she called up my employer and asked told her that her daughter needed a really good computer. She has no problem asking for anything she wants (airplane flights, clothing, furniture, money) yet she gives nothing back. She never even checks in on Fridays to see if my boss MIGHT need her. If anything special comes up and my boss needs a little help on the weekends, she calls me or cancels her plans. The nanny even had the nerve to tell my boss that she spent her $2000 Christmas present cash bailing her brother out of jail and she needed it for rent. Guess what, she got it but after her brother went to court, the money never made it back to my boss. Friendly? Yes. Jolly? Yes. Lazy? So much so. Conniving? Absolutely.

These are only an example of three nannies I have personally worked with, all Jamaican though. They all received top dollar and my boss even gave one of them a car. So when I hear people go on and on about people being BROAD WITH THEIR COMMENTS or UNFAIR TO ISLANDERS, I can only laugh. Obviously they have little or no experience with them. The best wish I have for them is to hire one and see for themselves. Sometimes you get what you pay for and sometimes you don't. Also, most of the people here from the Islands are not here legally and have to be paid under the table. So, as far as Jamaican nannies go, buyer beware. FYI Side point before anyone gets off topic about the amount of help my boss used, she had four kids that were constantly going in different directions, different schools, and many appointments, sports and other activities. She is a great mom and has spent her entire life catering to the happiness of her children. I just find it impossible to comprehend this brazen nerviness people have, this absolute sense of entitlement. This boggles my mind, because in the years I have been a nanny, I have seen other examples of highly paid, difficult, demanding, trouble-making, and do nothing Jamaican nannies. What gives?

90 comments:

Wicker Park Nanny said...

I am constantly reading about these Jamaican nannies in NY and most everything is NOT GOOD. Could this be a cultural thing? Maybe in their culture laziness is acceptable?

I don't mean to be racist and most of the time I'm one of those people saying don't make broad generalizations about Islanders. My husband is from Haiti and he is the hardest working man I know. But what gives? Does anyone have anything positive to say about these Jamaican nannies?

OP, you're post is so unbelievable. If those things really did happen I am completely flabbergasted. These nannies obviously felt a sense of entitlement... and unfortunately it doesn't make a very pretty picture of your boss' sanity - why would she doll out so much for shoddy work?

Hopefully you can encourage your boss to choose a different ethnicity next time around, assuming that is the issue.

she deserved it said...

umm, I'm sorry but I don't feel sorry for you or for the family you worked for that was clearly taken advantage of. The mom hired those women! I don't think anyone can complain about their nanny if they are the one who hired them in the first place. Tooooo bad!

Blah said...

Funny thing you say this. I was hired by these two families to replace an AA 50 yr old nanny. I hate to stereotype but I can't help but do it after several experiences I've had with AA women. They all have this sense of entitlement. Like it is the boss's obligation to sastisfy their every demand and like they can do whatever they want without consequences. I was astounded to hear some of the horror stories these families were telling me about this woman. From the laundry loads to having complete disrespect for the younger mom, to lying on minimal things (like taking the kids for walks which she never did and using the weather cover for the stroller which she also never did, unless she somehow has figured out a way to factory fold it) to making grocery lists that the family had to fullfill.

Talk about rude.

what's the point? said...

OP, i can't really say that your post does anything to defend against the "broad comments" thing. you've known THREE jamaican nannies. three. that's it.

and, though i wouldn't say your boss deserved this behavior, i think it's clear that the way she handled these employees gave them some credence to take advantage. i'm more of a mind that it's something to do with the employer, rather than something to do with the country of origin, that causes this behavior. are you REALLY trying to say that ALL jamaican nannies fit this stereotype?

yes, we do hear a lot about lazy jamaican nannies on this site ... because it is a site to report BAD nannies ... and there seem to be quite a few jamaican nannies in NY. if there was a site specifically devoted to GOOD nannies (and i mean more than just the disappointingly occasional good sighting that makes its way to this site), do you really expect that there would be NO jamaican nannies on it?

really, i think it's still just kind of a broad generalization. and even if it isn't ... what's the point of your post? how is this kind of ranting supposed to lead to some kind of positive change?

man with a machine said...

My sister has a Jamaican housekeeper and an English nanny. She often asks the nanny to do housekeeping chores because she is so afraid of the Jamaican housekeeper's reaction when she does ask her to do something. Something that is part of a housecleaning task. I know the English nanny has had many conversations with my sister complaining about the housekeeper, but what it seems to come down to is my sister is afraid of the housekeeper. This is a housekeeper who can't be asked to clean the refrigerator or pantry until she sees something she wants, at which time she cleans the pantry or refrigerator and takes home what she concludes are "outdated" and no longer good. A pound of Swiss cheese from Wednesday, no longer good on Friday. ???

Why are these women able to exact such fear in their EMPLOYERS?

Who works for who?

Emily said...

What happened to "if you can't say something good, don't say anything at all"? This post serves no purpopse other than to denegrate an entire nationality based on a few experiences--that's like the textbook definition of racism!

OP, do you teach your charges to make blanket judgements? Do you teach them it's ok to judge a whole group of people based on your experiences with a different person who happens to share their skin color, gender, sexual orientation or nationality?

We need to practice what we preach!

MinuteMuggle said...

I'm sorry, but to me this just sounds like a racist rant. What is the point except to make a sweeping generalization of an entire race of people because of your limited experience with a couple of women?

I'm personally offended by this post. It reeks of ill will, jealousy and entitlement. Eww. I felt icky just reading it.

DT said...

HOnestly, your boss sounds co-dependent and not a little insane. I think there is probably a reason she invites people like this into her life, and the fact that several have been Jamaican is just a coincidence.

Lis said...

Why do you care? Its not YOU being taken advantage of. And them being poor nanny's makes you have a job.

SAHM said...

Maybe your boss knows something you don't about these people. I can't believe ANYONE (let alone a woman with ROUND THE CLOCK NANNIES) would go to such trouble to make special meals for her nanny unless she truly cared for and about her.

And who cares if the nanny put her child in the tub with the employers children.

Sounds to me like you are jealous of the special treatment these other women are getting- and I would guess that if they (the "bad" nannies) are making out like total bandits then you must be living on easy street since I'm sure you are a "good" nanny.

It's not your money-so what do you care what your employer does with it? She is old enough to have 4 children-sounds to me like she can manage her own money without you looking over her shoulder. Your post sounds like total racist sour grapes to me.

Upstate mom said...

My sister has had the same live-in Jamaican nanny for 14 years!!! There has never been a complaint. She is a lovely, charming, nurturing woman whom my niece and nephew rely on for support as they do my sister and brother-in-law. She is legal, travels to jamaica yearly, and has never exhibited any of the behavior mentioned here. Doesn't mean that all Jamaican nannies are perfect, just that they are not all entitled slobs. Your boss also needs some help to stop being codepedent. Pay someone for a year who doesn't work??? You must be sooo envious and wish you could get away with that nonsense.

just another mommy said...

Your employer has a problem, she is too nice. These people have just figured out how they can keep getting the most out of her, to her shame.

And yes, there is a problem with someone who is a stay at home mom needing two nannies at a time. I'm a stay at home mother of 3 who every day has at least one extra child here to take care of and I have 0 nannies. I have a good friend who has 5 children who all have different activities, places to be, sports, etc. and she also has 0 nannies.

It's great that your employer can afford to not only employ 2-3 nannies (one of whom is not even working), but can also afford to keep allowing them to help themselves to such generous "bonuses". How lucky for her.

Jack's nanny said...

I am a nanny in Manhattan and had a lot of good experiences with Jamaican nannies! I am not from Jamaica and from what I see they are good with the kids! You sound racist to me......

Law of ODDS said...

Give me a break. I won't even take a job where the children's peers are nannies by Jamaicans. They are like the most wholly naturaly union ever. They get together and scheme and set rates and demands and they block out every non Jamaican from playdates and outings. Not very good for the children! Yes, it's true.

Why are you trouncing on this person. She said she was sharing HER experience. My experience is also negative.

But surely, there are good experiences. They're have to be.

sara said...

I think you're boss just sounds too nice and the other nannies learned how to walk all over her. Maybe one saw how the other got away with stuff and figured they would too. That happens all the time in the real world with jobs. You just decided not to ask for everything and get nothing and this has left some residual bitchiness and pent up resentment.

Regardless of race, anyone who gets a paycheck for not doing anything and doesn't seem to care or reach and out and ask if there is anything she can do to be of assistance, that's a reprehensible person.

nk said...

Someone said something about an employer being afraid of her Jamaican housekeeper and asking the English nanny to do some of her work. I totally can relate. My employer would periodically give things away that she didn't need, gift cards or gift certificates, computers, and the like and one day I said to her after a conversation with her decorator, "if you're serious about getting rid of your kitchen table set, 'Joe' and I would love to have it for the new house. It's a beautiful set and I'd pay you whatever you think is fair".
She looked at me and said, "I couldn't. Where would I tell 'Marta' it went?". And that is how it went. The nanny, (I was a tutor) would demand to know where things went if they weren't in the house. There was some unwritten law whereby everything went to her. She seemed to be a decent enough nanny, just not the brightest, which I appreciated. I had between 4-5 hour$ a week in that home every week.

Lindsey said...

While I find the OP's post rather dramatic and dare I say a little embellished, it doesn't change the fact, about MOST Jamaican nannies. Not ALL, but MOST.

Not not all are bad, not all white people are snobs, not all black people are ghetto, not all Asians are smart, not all Mexicans are dirty.

Yes these are all stereo-types, but these "races" got these stereo-types pegged on them for a reason.

Reason being? Because most people's experiences with them have been BAD, and they all most always share the same complaint. So no not ALL of one race is whatever, but it's safe to say that if you run into one that they probably fit the mold.

I have never met a Jamaican so I have no comment on them, but its like reading a review at a restaurant. If `1 or 2 people tell me the food is bad, I may still try it, but if 100's all tell me the same thing, I'm not gonna go there.

This is our world people, stop being so damn sensitive. We live by our experiences, whether they be good or bad.

Portlander said...

This post is really offensive. Language like "savagely chomped" is obviously playing into racist stereotypes. I'm sorry to see this bigoted rant published here, and sorry to see so many commenters quickly agree with it.

Ryan's mum said...

I don't believe this posting. It sounds very over the top.

Unknown said...

Wicker Park -

They aren't really lazy. They are more just aggressive and have a very strong sense of entitlement. I have no idea why. I don't know if they really make "top dollar." The ones I know here all live in shit neighborhoods in Brooklyn, the Bronx or Harlem and I know this because I chat with them at kids classes that I've taken with my kids I care for. I make enough to live in the neighborhood I work in, and that's because I have a college degree and I speak excellent English, neither of which are attributed to these women.

I don't know why they are so cocky.. and I don't know why people hire women whose pronunciation of every word is incorrect and disgusting, to be the preschool educators of their children.

maybe coincidence said...

Inconsiderate, entitled people come in all ethnicities.
I have not known any Jamaican nannies, but I've known a fair number of Jamaican teachers, and they are far from lazy, and care tremendously for their students. Culturally, Jamaicans do have different values/standards for raising children from what we typically find in the US, but that's not what this post is even talking about.
I think the extreme behavior of the nannies described is due in part to the employer being way too...generous. Many people (regardless of country of origin) will take advantage of someone who allows themself to be walked all over like that.

tmom said...

I have family members who are grabby and entitled like that, and it annoys me to know end...Sounds like your boss has terrible people management skills and you are getting the short end of the stick....why would you as the nanny clean up after the other nanny's dinner? I think this post says more about the boss than it does about the Jamaican nannies. OP, maybe you need a better gig.

MinuteMuggle said...

Wow, there are so many racist people who visit ISYN. I'm really surprised by this behavior, and by anyone defending the language and obviously misguided opinions of this post.

I guess it just goes to show that for every forward step we take in this country, there will always be people who are setting us back. It pains me that most of these people are young people, though.

Anonymous said...
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Nom De Plume said...

Stereotypical racist generalizations aside, how come OP isn't pointing out the obvious? A mom who doesn't work but has 3 nannies?!? HELLO? Why spawn if you're not going to be a parent? I don't care how many social obligations you have, 3 different nannies? Personally it sounds as if the momboss is paying off her guilt for not being there for her children.
For the record, I've worked with plenty of aggressive lazy people, most of them white over the years.

Beezle said...

I agree with you entirely Emily. Sure, the women (regardless of their heritage) described in this post sound like atrocious, using, lazy employees...however, it is no reason to elicit an unquestionably racist rant. I work in NYC as a nanny. In my three and a half years here, I've met a broad variety of nannies from practically every part of the world. For every culture I've encountered in my particular line of work, I've seen both good and bad examples of nannies. At the end of the day, people are people. Some good, some terrible. Stop trying to paint one entire culture with the same brush.

Shame on the OP for using this web site as a public forum for her prejudice.

Amy said...

I didn't read the whole post because I am just SHOCKED that YOU let this go on for so long. Why the hell didn't you tell the parents about her actions the moment you witnessed them?

Wicker Park Nanny said...

Sarah, thanks for the clarification. I've not met any Jamaican nannies here in Chicago, though I'm sure they are around.

and Lindsey, I agree with your assessment. Every ethnicity has stereotypes. They certainly don't describe everyone, rather a large majority.

I was glad to hear of a couple of instances of good Jamaican nannies! It was encouraging to hear there are some out there. Too bad we don't hear about good nannies (of every ethnicity) more often!

raul said...

Three nannies. Where does it say they were there around the clock or even at the same time. I don't think this is a reflection of the mom, just seems like mom wants her children to be able to persue their interests. I see alot of families where all three kids have to go one child's soccer practice. The kids have to say no to certain programs and activbities because one mom cannot do all the driving. Stop judging.

The nannies should really be happy that one person is carving out a niche/providing employment for more than one nanny. And how pleasant that has to be. No crazy chaos. Im envios.

Educated Nanny said...

I agree with Sarah; you are spot on. Many of these nannies from the Islands speak appalling English, which is not appropriate for children who are learning to talk. I am a nanny in NYC and we have a baby nurse who works at the weekend. I cannot understand what she says through all the sucking of her teeth and her poor sentence structure, so I can imagine the kids have trouble working out what she is talking about. Luckily she is only there to help out rather than to be one of the main educators of the children.

MinuteMuggle said...

Educated Nanny,

You sound like a snob. It is important for children to be exposed to many different types of people and many different dialects. It makes them well-rounded, accepting people, not stuck up snobs who feel their education makes them better than everyone else.

Educated Nanny said...

MinuteMuggle,

Yes, children do need to be exposed to different types of people and different dialects, but remember that children learn from the people who are looking after them. Therefore it is preferable that the carers speak correct English (or any other language)rather than exposing children to poor grammar,incorrect pronunciation (for example, dropping letters) and badly structured sentences.

MinuteMuggle said...

Educated Nanny,

You're a snob.

Get over yourself. This is America, and children need loving caregivers, not grammar Nazis. Trust me, these kids will learn their English just fine: a mix of loving, different, unique people is a wonderful thing for children. Children learn not just from the people who are looking after them, but from everyone they come in contact with. I trust that the parents of the children in question use proper grammar and sentence structure: if their loving caregiver speaks in her own dialect or language (it is, by the way, very difficult to learn a language when you are in a foreign country, don't know if you've ever had that experience, I'm guessing not) then the children will not suffer.

you need a moniker said...

stereotypes are stereotypes for a reason. I'm sick of everyone pulling out the race card. the jamaican culture as a whole is definitely more laid back and raise their kids differently....this is not to say that every jamaican behaves this way. but I totally agree with the poster!

May 6, 2009 9:23:00 AM

adelle said...

I live in an area where most families, (except the Japanese) use Jamaican nannies. When it came time to hire my first nanny, I had several Jamaican applicants, some others and I chose the nanny that seemed the best. I caught her on nanny camera putting the child in the swing and leaving the child there for 4 hours plus while she sat on the sofa, slept on the sofa and talked on her cell phone. I replaced her with a white nanny from North Dakota. The Japanese mothers wanted nothing to do with her nor did the Jamaican nannies. She eventually quit because she said the job was just too lonely. She talked of trying to befriends the Jamaican nannies, but being shut out. As I came to learn, it seemed they resented her for doing things like swinging with the baby (what fun) and sitting in the sand with her and playing with her.

My experience has not been positive. It isn't racial. The blame should fall on the mothers who employ these nannies. They come over from Jamaica without any education or even childcare experience but immediately get jobs watching children. It's the same way the day laborers from Mexico line up along the fence to get work. These guys have never done a lot of stuff they end up doing, but in their case they can learn and they are supervised. The nannies- nope and nope.

ahhhhhhhhh said...

is your boss and idiot or what

So True said...

I agree 100% with the poster. Until you have first hand expericence with Jamaican nannies, don't play the PC card. I made the mistake of hiring a Jamaican nanny. She became instant friends with all the other Jamaican nannies in the park the first week and my children started to have playdates with a lot of children they had never played with before (which I thought was great since we were relatively new to the neighborhood). She was fired instantly when I came home early to check up on what was going on (my 5 year old had become very sullen and was having nightmares) and heard the nanny screaming at my 5 year old from the open upstairs windows as I walked up to the front door. I paused for a second to try to hear what exactly was going on and heard her call my child several foul names followed by a loud sound like furniture falling. I ran to the front door and unlocked it to find my 5 year old at the bottom of the stairs and my nanny coming down the stairs with a snarl on her face that instantly changed to fake concern when she saw me there and she started to ask my daughter is she ok and she has to be more careful so she doesn't fall on the stairs. She even had the nerve to say as I held my sobbing daughter that the problem is the wood floors on the stairs are too slippery. I looked at her and threw her purse out the still open front door and told her she better get herself out there too before I call the police. She started screaming at me and had the nerve to damand her paycheck and severance but left quickly when I took out my cellphone and started to dialing. She had the nerve to call the agency she came from and complain about us even before I had a chance to call and complain. Even worse, she called her Jamaican nanny friends and bad mouth my family and the other bench sitters were mean to my children and next nanny to the point they would not go to the park where they used to spend time. One of the nannies (who is not Jamaican) who had babysat for my family in the past and recommended the agency I got my Jamaican bully from defended us and told them what happended and they still said that I had no right to fire her with no severance and said it was my "unruly" child's faultm. (My child is far from unruly and this woman had successfully terrorized her in the one month she worked for us--I actually dismissed her failure to warm up to her as trouble adjusting to me going back to work). I will NEVER hire a Jamaican nanny again--I could accept one bad apple, etc., but the fact that this Jamaican gang of nannies think her behavior is acceptable and it's OK to ostracize a child because she was abused by one of their own shows the quality of this group.

so scary said...

So True...I can't imagine what an awful experience that was for you, and thank goodness you arrived home when you did!

I'm wondering from you, and also from Adele, how did these nannies present themselves in interviews and what kind of references did they have? (I am genuinely curious, because of course I don't believe you would have hired them if you thought they would not be good to your children. But who in the world would give them references?!)

Educated Nanny said...

MinuteMuggle,

Ok, so I left out the fact that the baby nurse in question is actually not loving or caring, and my employers are keeping her on to help out at the weekends, out of convenience. She is sharp with the kids, complains the whole time about everything and feels she is entitled to whatever she wants. They had the chance to turn her into the full-time week day nanny but they decided against it, instead seeking an educated, well spoken person who would be able to teach their kids to speak and behave appropriately. They chose me because I have a college degree, and I speak French and Spanish. I earn double the baby nurse's wage per hour, and I get full health care benefits, along with many other perks. I am able to travel with the family because I am legal, and I pay my taxes, unlike many of these nannies from the Islands...but that is a completely different post.

By the way, employers do not tend to choose Jamaican nannies because they are looking for " a mix of loving, different, unique people" in their kids life; they choose them because they are cheap. I guess it all depends on whether they want someone to just watch their children or to actually educate them. Again, that's a completely different discussion...

V in Scarsdale said...

I've never posted before but wanted to share my story. I have seen first hand how a nanny can work a parent like that. The fault of the parent is only that she was too nice. Maybe, like I, she kept telling herself, "this is the person taking care of my child".

I live in Scarsdale and my mother lives in White Plains. I introduced the nanny to her early on and told her she should call her anytime she needed anything. My mother was foreign to the whole nanny thing, was actually not in favor of me being a working mother but did her best to be supportive.

The nanny did not drive and I had a 12 week old when the nanny started. One weekend, shortly after the nanny started, I told my mother that she should call up and offer to come over and take them to lunch and to a certain park that was farther than walking distance. My mom did this the following Tuesday and she thought it went well. Except for the fact that the nanny didn't think to thank her for lunch.

The next Monday, the nanny called my Mother and told her, "Did you want to go to lunch again tomorrow? I think it was good for *insert baby's name here*". My mom said sure and the next day they went to lunch, but it was raining so they didn't go to the park. Again, the nanny failed to say thank you.

On Thursday, the nanny called and asked my mother if she could come and get her and take her to CVS because she needed some lotion. Attempting to be accomodating, my mother said yes and picked them up and drove to CVS. As they pulled in to the parking lot, the nanny said, "just pull up to the door and wait for me, the baby doesn't need to be out today". She then assured my mother she would be "right quick". My mother claims she waited between 30 and 40 minutes. The baby fell asleep in the car and my mother didn't say anything to her but, "did you get everything you needed" the nanny said she did but then said, do you like McDonalds? I'm craving MCDonalds and there is no food in the house". So my mother drove over to the MCDonalds and parked. The nanny waited an awkward two minutes or so before saying, "Do you want me to get you something too?" My mother said, "No, thank you". The nanny said, "I usually get a *insert name of combo meal here* so it will be about $8 dollars all together." Silence. My mom was fuming, but she pleasantly handed her the money and then waited for her to go in and come out of McDonalds.
Think that is bad enough? As they were driving the short distance home, the baby started to wake. When they got to the driveway, the nanny tells my Mom that she should come in and play with *insert baby's name here* because *insert baby's name here* needs to know her grandmother. The nanny carried her CVS bags and McDonald's bags and my Mother carried the baby inside, not sure she was okay with being told by the nanny to stay. As soon as they went through the front door, the nanny grabbed with her free hand a bucket of teething type toys and said, "here" and then made a comment like, "I haven't gotten to sit down for a meal all week" and then she went and sat at the kitchen table with one of my magazines. After about 40 minutes, my mother came in to the kitchen and said, "I have some errands I need to run, so I'll be going now" and the nanny told her that she needed five more minutes so she could start a load of the baby's clothes. 15 minutes later the nanny returned to the family room and said, "All set" and took the baby from my Mother.

Was I furious? You bet. Did the nanny ever say thank you? Nope. But no one treats me mother like that! She was fired that same night. Since then and based upon the advice of an upscale nanny agency in the city, I have used only English or American nannies with education and training.

These nannies present very well during an interview. They turn on the charm and warmth. But it is our fault as parents for not stopping to consider the motivation for hiring a Jamaican nanny. True, it seems like it is the thing to do. But if you are looking for someone who can teach, nurture and guide your children, it only makes sense to hire someone with traning, not someone who as per a culture just happens to come over here and snag nanny and babysitting jobs.

MinuteMuggle said...

I think a person is either racist or they are not.

As far as stereotyping, it's not a good thing to do. It's not healthy and it just sets us back as a society. Trust me: the children you care for, Educated Nanny, can pick up on your obvious disdain. And that's really sad.

It is very true that some parents do not make the best choices in caregivers. This is unfortunate, but the fact remains that sitting around trashing a particular race of people is disgusting. It serves no purpose. Your prejudices no doubt cloud your judgement, as do OP's, which is obvious from the language in her post.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
you need a moniker said...

No matter how you look at it or put it this post and anyone justifying it IS RACIST, IGNORANT and HUGELY stereotyping. This site is to report people performing their jobs inappropriately and ethnicity and color of skin have absolutely nothing to do with that.

May 7, 2009 3:11:00 PM

Anonymous said...

I don't think all jamaican woman should be put in 1 category. I've known 2 jamaican nannies- how can I judge all jamaican nannies based on 2 interactions?

Nanny 1 was lazy but clean. She watched soaps all afternoon, got thousands of dollars of expensive hardly worn clothes each year for her kids and called her boss to complain about her bonus. All witnessed first hand.

Nanny 2 was all about socializing and her charges home sooooo gross because she didn't clean up after herself. She sat on a bench everyday and ate the kids snacks. She hit for punishment and both these nannies ran the house their way, and their schedule.

I didn't have a good experience with these ladies but I have dif issues with other cultures too. Guess everyone is annoying in their own way.

jojo bear said...

No one is judging ALL Jamaican nannies. She is talking about the three nannies she knew. She is offering her opinion and perspective in a feature on ISYN called Perspective and Opinion.

This is not your experience, it is her experience. It's unfortunate that she didn't meet 3 more Jamaican nannies that were courteous, gracious, well mannered, hard working and ethical. Then perhaps we could all smile about the balance thing. We could all give each other one politically correct near kiss.

You want to talk stereotypes? We all have them. Are you brave enough to admit that you have them? Personally, I find Brazilian women over 40 to be the best nannies because they seem to be consistently loving and hardworking. I find red headed women to be unbalanced, green eyed women to be bitches, Japanese men to be fantastic in bed, Pitbulls to be dangerous, Fat women to be eager to please, Fat men to be lazy, Cat people to be depressing, Vegetarians to be annoying and Mormons to be sexually deviant

MinuteMuggle said...

hey jojo,

I see you have not changed. you are as judgemental as ever. and as crass.

believe it or not, admitting that you are prejudice and are so quick to stereotype is not brave. It's just stupid and embarrassing for you.

ja makin me crazy said...

Your story is running so many circles around me that my head is spinning.

What was your point?

comment for "educated nanny' said...

Is 'carer a word'? Haha for all your so call education, degree and so on ..............you should be able to write and form your words properly!

Beezle said...

Minute Muggle-

Thanks for actually (trying to) talk some sense to those in the comment section who are using this ridiculous post as an excuse to exercise their prejudices.

Educated Nanny-

You don't sound all that educated, at least enough to live up to your title. You come off as extremely elitist. I happen to live in NYC as a nanny too. Believe me, kids that live in large urban areas score vastly higher on vocabulary and language tests than other more rural areas. The reason? Constant exposure to a garden variety of languages creates a receptivity in the developing brain of a young child. Want some veritable proof? Bam: http://www.cfr.nichd.nih.gov/ld.html

Did you ever learn how to cite any of your broad opinions or claims with actual evidence or support while studying to become an "Educated Nanny"? If not, you should try it some time. It helps in what I like to call "building an argument."

I know a handful of Jamaican nannies that are just lovely and absolutely dedicated.

Evolve, people. Please. For the future's sake.

Not so quickly said...

"Comment for Educated Nanny"

"Carer" is a word. Take a look at: http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/carer

And it is "so called" not "so call" so don't try to beat up Educated Nanny when you are getting the English language wrong yourself.

Dont Hate, Get Real said...

jojo bear,

That was m.f'in Hilarious!!! Loved it!

Perfect example of how we perceive people, not racism, just personal experience.

I have yet to bed a Japanese man, but am now curious.

Signed,

A green eyed vegetarian!!

P.S. I have outgrown the annoying stage...

Dont Hate, Get Real said...

Jojo bear,

p.p.s. Totally agree on the red headed women, wtf, right?

HotMess-Guru said...

You are disgusting. You are nothing but racist trash. How can you begin to make a sweeping generalization about Jamaican nannies based on your experience with but three people from a population of about 2.6 million. Are you crazy? I watch the news everyday. Is it fair to say all white men are child molesters, wife murderers, bombers, cannibals and psychos. Is it fair to watch Sex and the City a couple times, Girls Gone Wild videos and say that all white women are sluts? Is it fair to say all Catholic priests are Pedophiliacs. You were married once or twice and ended up divorced is it fair to say all men or women are scums. One black man stole from you all black men are theives? WTF. This is the most blatant, racist thing I have ever seen. No seriously, WTF is going on? You need to take your butt out of the nanny profession because I seriously fair you may be raising prospective KKK members.

MinuteMuggle said...

Don't hate, get real:

Why don't you get off this board if you have nothing to contribute that is worthwhile? Jojo's comments were not funny, they were juvenile and offensive. We are not really here to talk about the types of guys we sleep with. It is really not the proper forum. There must be another blog for you and jojo to go to for that: this one is regarding childcare.

mom said...

Jojo bear was obviously trying to be funny...and she was.

So was whoever suggested we all share in one big PC hug.

It's one thing to be PC 24/7...but reality is reality and I hope people are more concerned with their children than to refuse to open their eyes even to things that POSSIBLE or even LIKELY. Your children are counting on YOU as their parents to do the best you possibly can for them in every possible way. Just because something isn't true 100% of the time doesn't mean it is not a distinct possibility. Some stereotypes ARE earned. NO, it's not fair to people from those groups who are NOT like that...but fair or not fair doesn't change the facts...and when kids are involved there's no room for "she seemed so nice in the interview."

I'm sure some pit bulls are actually sweet. Would I chance it by leaving one near my small children? NEVER.

Why hire an inexperienced day laborer, willing to do anything at all to earn a dollar, when you could hire an educated, trained, professional nanny who has chosen the profession, not because she has no other alternatives and can't speak English well enough to work in the mainstream, but because she has a calling to work with children? Makes zero sense to me...unless you're just wanting to park your kids with the cheapest warm body you can get your hands on. If that's you, don't ease your own guilt by trying to shove the race card down the throats of those who don't look the other way at inferior childcare. Your child's personality is largely formed before they enter kindergarten. Take that chance...but you kid may pay for the rest of his life if your gamble doesn't pay off.

I really wish there was licensing for all childcare workers and minimum standards could be set. That way nobody could get a nanny job without making a real effort to become qualified. That way we would know that the person watching these children was not just nannying for lack of any other alternative, but because they actually wanted to.

truth and consequences said...

Man, some of you and the liberal pussyfooting you do. Stand up and think with your head instead of your bleeding heart. This is an opinion piece, represents one person's opinion and shares her personal experience with 3 nannies. I'm guessing she shared it because it is so outlandish.

Anonymous said...

Yes me again, originator of the post. I just would like to add a few things. Although I said I worked with these three particular nannies I am a nanny myself, so of course I have seen a broad spectrum of nannies. These are not the only three Jamaican nannies I know of, nor are they the only three I know negative behaviors about, but just three I personally had to work with all the time so this is MY STORY.
I have a job with the family because I am a great nanny. I take my kids out of the house, from everywhere to parks to museums to the city sightseeing in trips. I never EVER watch TV with them unless maybe one is home sick and in "sick bay" on the couch. I am a great driver and a great swimmer. I have traveled with this family all over the world.
I am not jealous of this type of behavior for one simple fact. I was raised with higher moral standards than these gals obviously were. Sometimes my mouth drops open in awe at the things these ladies get away with. I know in this situation if I was a different kind of person, I would absolutely be able to get away with murder. But I never would, never could, and to thinking about taking advantage of a woman with suck a kind, pure heart whose one crime might be that she is too nice, too giving, and easily manipulated by the people who are being paid top dollar to help her.

Portlander said...

@mom: One can be considerate about hiring a passionate, qualified nanny without stereotyping an entire nationality. There is absolutely no reason to talk about a group of people in the manner that this poster did, and all the qualifications that some people are piping up with, like "She meant most, not all," and "Some stereotypes ARE earned" are reprehensible. I can't believe people are so eager to excuse away this racism.

SD said...

Have you ever been to Jamaica? They are really a slow moving people. Call it super laid back. They never rush or hurry. Ever. They have their own way of doing things and they also cling to their way of doing things when they get here. This is a fact. I had a nanny from Jamaica once, she was very slow moving, loved to lounge on the sofa and chat on the phone and hated to be told what to do or how to do things, which was unfortunate because I did require to give her direction. She came over from Jamaica 2 years before I hired her and had worked two nanny jobs prior to mine. She did not last that long.

I worked with a physical therapist from Jamaica, a male. He was very laid back, but moved when he needed to. His laid back demeanor was an assett to his clients. He was very compassionate and strong and developed a really good following based on his no nonsense advice.

The core problem as I see it, is not Jamaicans, but the fact that somehow on the boat betwixt here and there, they magically become professiona childcare providers. And the only reason these unskilled women take these jobs is because they are easy to get and the job is easy. A real nanny doesn't have an easy job. Someone doing a half ass job who doesn't really care about the children does have it easy.

Am I making sense? Is it normal to need more than one mimosa? And then for that mimosa to leave you craving gin?

i cant follow directions said...

This all sounds like lies, i can't believe anyone would be so bold and brash and i can't believe anyone would allow employees or anyone for that matter to treat them this way. She sounds like she dislikes caribbean people (especially jamaicans). Come on she is saying one person didnt work for a year and she still got paid. Give me a break already!

OP said...

Got paid for a year? We're moving past a year and she continues to get paid- with no end in sight. Not only is it all true, but I could add more to the story. Your head would spin.

jessica said...

It does sound unbelievable and maddening. If I had to lay witness it and even be on the receiving end of it (picking up her slack), I think I would be pissed enough to do something. But then, what can you do? Excepy write a rant.

And for the record, I loathe seeing people come on here and call a poster a liar. It's a big, wide worl and lots of strange and unbelievable things happen every single day.

too funny said...

i cant follow directions:

Whoever did that, thank you for my laugh for the day!

mom said...

SD SAID:

"The core problem as I see it, is not Jamaicans, but the fact that somehow on the boat betwixt here and there, they magically become professiona childcare providers. And the only reason these unskilled women take these jobs is because they are easy to get and the job is easy. A real nanny doesn't have an easy job. Someone doing a half ass job who doesn't really care about the children does have it easy."

Exactly!!!!!!
Lets be fair to people...but does that really mean having to pretend to be blind? OP has stated her experiences with three women, and what she has witnessed with several others. She has stated her personal observations and labeled them as such. Don't shoot the messenger.

OP there are some people here who will call people a racist for even mentioning a person's race if they are not white. I have to wonder sometimes whether those people crying "racist" are actually a lot more racist themselves than they even realize (or care to admit)...because I have seen many, many instances here where these people assume because the OP, or a commenter, mentions a person's race at all, if it is not white, that it is automatically presumed to be an insult. What's up with that? Maybe, just maybe some non-whites are proud of their heritage and are not ashamed to have it mentioned outright.

You have gone so far as to say you have witnessed "stereotypical Jamaican nanny behavior" yourself, and some people refuse to believe that different cultures DO do things differently that others. I htink we're all smart enough here to realize that there is no single box that every person form every culture fits into, and that there are good and bad in every group...but some insist on taking that to such an extreme that we are apparently not allowed now to even notice or speak of cultural differences, if any of those differences do not reflect positively on that culture.

DenverNanny said...

If educated nannies weren't to be preferred(for a HUGE number of reasons) we wouldn't get paid more than uneducated nannies... Just like in just about EVERY other career, higher education combined with years of experience equals better quality employee and a pay raise.
Every area has "that" group of nannies that are viewed as the bad nannies--whether is be a race, a part of town, whatever. Just because educated nannies are more likely to provide better care than the uneducated, inexperienced and often just BAD childcare providers, does NOT mean we're racist.
And Jojo's comments were hysterical... this a blog people, lighten up.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
OP get a moniker said...

Anonymous said...
Yes me again, originator of the post. I just would like to add a few things. Although I said I worked with these three particular nannies I am a nanny myself, so of course I have seen a broad spectrum of nannies. These are not the only three Jamaican nannies I know of, nor are they the only three I know negative behaviors about, but just three I personally had to work with all the time so this is MY STORY.
I have a job with the family because I am a great nanny. I take my kids out of the house, from everywhere to parks to museums to the city sightseeing in trips. I never EVER watch TV with them unless maybe one is home sick and in "sick bay" on the couch. I am a great driver and a great swimmer. I have traveled with this family all over the world.
I am not jealous of this type of behavior for one simple fact. I was raised with higher moral standards than these gals obviously were. Sometimes my mouth drops open in awe at the things these ladies get away with. I know in this situation if I was a different kind of person, I would absolutely be able to get away with murder. But I never would, never could, and to thinking about taking advantage of a woman with suck a kind, pure heart whose one crime might be that she is too nice, too giving, and easily manipulated by the people who are being paid top dollar to help her.

May 8, 2009 10:33:00 AM

lots of love said...

OP, you are starting to sound like the mother pretending to be a nanny to find out what you should do about your three lazy nannies...

you have an absurd affection for your boss...

mom said...

lots of love,
huh?

Sounds like she has a good work ethic is all. When somebody works hard, as a matter of principle and self respect, it is hard to watch others take such advantage, that's for sure. We teach our kids that doing right is the best way to go, even if it isn't the easiest way, in the long run. It's not easy to watch others who have no work ethic whatsoever get away with ripping off the boss when everything in her being tells her this is wrong. It's not a sign of "absurd affection" but probably more one of empathy and compassion. One can only hope that somebody working in such an intimate capacity in their own home would have some empathy and common compassion inside them.

eg said...

I think some of you responding are just way out of your realm of comfort. Maybe you live for from NY, don't deal with Jamaicans or nannies for that part. As an employer of nannies and baby nurses for 13 years with friends who employe nannies and baby nurses and housekeepers, I can say without hesitation, there are far worse stories out there.

MinuteMuggle said...

I agree with the fact that people are quick to call others racist unecessarily. It happens all the time. But this post, to me, is quite racist, as are some of the comments. It is racist because it negatively targets a certain race of people, their culture, and it serves absolutely no purpose but to bash.

I live in a very urban area, and I work with many different types of people and children, from many different countries. I really don't mean to sound like a stick in the mud who needs to lighten up, and I certainly don't wish to share a great big PC hug with anyone. I like to have fun on this blog too and joke around. But this is a sensitive issue for me. I hate to see any race of people stereotyped. I don't think it is something that needs to be done. And to me, it's not funny.

fox in socks said...

I did not read every single comment on this thread, because there are so many, but I read most of them.

First I would like to say that the OP's story or anything like this when stated this way with blanket statements such as "all jamaican nannies are terrible," is racist. There is no two ways about this. Furthermore one of the early commenters went ahead and made such blanket statements about "AA" people. This is not okay. This is racism. I'm surprised Jane left these kinds of things up on the site.

However, if you take out the statements blanketing Jamaican nannies, and just talk about, for example, uneducated nannies who are not from the US, then the comments and postings would not be racist. It is not because the people in question are from Jamaica that makes them bad nannies!! That is racist. They are not bad nannies because they are from Jamaica. It has nothing to do with that.

I enjoyed reading So True's comment on May 6, 2009 10:32:00 PM, (apart from the blanket racist generalizations). Although it was a horrifying story, it doesn't surprise me in the least.

I have seen so many neglectful, shallow, idiot "nannies" who do not have the ability to take care of children, whose idea of care is nothing like the mother's idea of care. I always urge on this site that parents should LISTEN BETTER to their children. Parents are often all too eager to chalk up their childn's unwillingness or unhappiness to transition to their nanny to the child's separation issues. It is not separation. It's likely because your kid is being neglected and mistreated.

I've seen parents hold their children back, discover that their development is not up to the level that it's supposed to be come kindergarten time, and the parent has no clue that the nanny has not done anything but treat the child with disdain for the past 3 years. Of course the child will not develop to his/her full potential with this kind of care.

Bottom line is that these nannies may not be doing anything that they wouldn't do to their own progeny. Their standards are not the same as the parent that employs them.

And that means that they shouldn't be working as nannies. So stop hiring them, people, and get rid of them immediately if you even suspect the slightest problem, because your kids will tell you, they will give hints, and you just need to listen more carefully so that you finally hear them.

fox in socks said...

of course I should have typed the expression "there are no two ways about it"

Dont Hate, Get Real said...

MinuteMuggle,

Whatever, you are absurd, why should anyone tell anyone what boards to comment on?

I thought Jojo bear's generalizations were funny and ironically so.

Also, I am married, I am not really going to "bed" a Japanese man. That was a joke. Hello? Anyone home?

This blog may be about childcare, but you have obviously not been here long, as the discussions can take turns in any direction, as they should. And we are certaintly all adults here, I have never seen a comment from a child.

This is one of the best blogs out there in my opinion, the commenters all address one another and the discussions are usually quite interesting. I am always disapointed on slow days when there isn't much action.

On another note, there ARE sometimes disturbingly racist-leaning commenters. I can only hope that those racist opinions are from sheltered, ignorant, people who live in bubbles, and not a common slice of America.

On the other hand, I live in a progressive city and there are people in my neighborhood (a diverse neighborhood of, white, black and hispanic people) stupid enough to hang a confederate flag up. Right next door to a mosque! And I do NOT live in the south. I saw them heiling Hitler! Disgusting.

OP of Privacy Window Post said...

Mom,
I find it really interesting that you can take a stand for OP here and trust her observations, but in my post, because I didn't go incident by incident (which I could have, but wanted to save you, the reader, some time) about my boss being in my business, and didn't give specific encounters as to the other problems I have, you called me out as basically some snot nosed youngster who wants the world handed to me. I'll have you know that yes, I'm young, but I've worked a full time job and supported myself since the day I graduated high school. I fully believe that my boss IS controlling and invasive, and it's not chalked up to just my annoyance at the situation (which obviously I'm unhappy here.) I've had plenty of people, even my charges friends mothers, make mention of it. I don't need your approval for my opinions which I feel are backed up.

I did see her side, and even addressed that in my followup comments, but you couldn't see it for what it was and decided to read what only you wanted to read into the comments.

You need to be more consistent in your thought processes and take note and admit when you're wrong. Even after several people pointed it out to you, many of whom were your supporters, you still defended your behavior.

You said, "She has stated her personal observations and labeled them as such. Don't shoot the messenger." Why can't you always take that attitude??? Again, try a little more consistency mom.

mom said...

Privacy window OP,
Good grief. Are you still worked up over that? NO, I did not entirely agree with you. I thought maybe you could work things out by at least looking at things from your employers perspective, if I remember correctly. Several people did agree with you. I didn't....well, in part I did, but not entirely. I thought she owed you your privacy...but that you didn't need to go batshit crazy about her closing your window to turn on the air conditioning...if I remember correctly (believe it or not, I have had other, more pressing issues on my mind in the time between then and now.) You asked for our opinions and mine was different from yours, and several other posters apparently. So what? Take the advice you liked and forget mine. I'm not your mom. I'm not your boss. I don't even know you. Take me or leave me. It's your choice...but please, don't waste time precious time out of your life being upset over that. I gave my opinion and then went on with my life and forgot about it...it was a blip, and your wasting time being mad about it is detracting from your life. I meant you no harm and tried to direct you as I would one of my own children. In this economy, suck up the insignificant crap and hold onto your job. The nice thing about a place like this is you can get several different perspectives. Maybe somebody will suggest something you never thought about before that you want to try. It's not personal, dear. I'm different in my thinking than when I was younger...less idealistic, more practical...as you will most likely be in time too. I have too many friends out of work right now to suggest somebody ruin a perfectly good job over minutia.
Peace.

mom said...

Minute Muggle,
I had wondered if that was you. I hope all is well and happy in your world these days. You have been in my thoughts.

MinuteMuggle said...

Thanks Mom! Great to see you here! xoxox

Don't hate, Get Real:

I have indeed been here a long, long time. And I agree with you on two counts: I am a little absurd at times. You are not the first person to tell me this.
:)

And two: this is one of the best blogs on the web.

you need a moniker said...

Sorry, but this story is unbelievable. I do believe there are people out there that are so kind that doesn't see when someone is taking advantage of them but to the point that they never realized that they were spending way too much water for a family of 6?Or the fact that the nanny's child was awful?And how come the kids didn't tell the parents that the nannies were boring and didn't play with them?!Perhaps the parents didn't care about that and they allowed the nanny to wash her clothes on their house.
I am not defending anybody, I have met only one Jamaican nanny here in L.A. and she was great; her ex-boss still misses her, the little girl is 4 now and she is still remembers her.
If that story is true, the boss probably was ok with everything she did, and you are mad because you were working hard.

May 8, 2009 2:48:00 PM

Privacy Poster said...

Mom,
It's not that I'm caught up about the situation at all. In fact, like I said in my last comment, I got to a point where I didn't give a flying shit (I think that was the exact term?)

While I was reading through this entry and the followup comments and saw your comments, it really irked me because my personal "observations" were exactly what you were throwing back.

I'm just annoyed that you come across as "Holier Than Thou" yet you speak out of both sides of your mouth.

MaryPoppin'Pills said...

MM
XO

b-i-n-g-o said...

Where is the water being wasted? What am I missing? Are you kidding about that? DO you really think that everyone watches their water bill like that?

Dude, I think it goes without saying that we are talking about a very wealthy family.

And stop reposting for idiots that don't know to use a moniker. "You need a moniker". I am so over seeing these posts. They can't play the game right, theire words need not be heard.

MinuteMuggle said...

MPP: XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

:)

mom said...

Privacy poster,

Since you don't give a flying shit (Just as you apparently didn't really care about the window being closed), why not just move on and forget it?

Frankly, your inability to just let this go..I mean REALLY let it go...not just follow me to other threads and continue harping about how you don't really care...makes me all the more certain that my original suspicions were correct.

I suspect that your employer just sort of generally annoyed you, probably for many reasons, just as I apparently do, and you just couldn't get past it and needed to blow off some steam. I suspect that she was also annoyed with you and that you were generally butting head over many issues, right? You sound sort of high strung and overly dramatic. Again, I assert my opinion that you would do better not to sweat the small stuff, learn a little give and take, and hold onto your otherwise good job in this sucky economy. In times like this it's just too expensive to keep feeding that high horse.

The OP of this thread asked for no advice and was simply stating her general observations. She is making twice as much money as the bad nannies she works alongside, so if I were to give her advice it would be this: Thank you for being a great nanny to some kids who need to see a good work ethic modeled to them by somebody like you, when they are otherwise surrounded by opportunistic, lazy thug nannies. Kepp your job. The pay sounds great. You deserve to be paid well. And the economy sucks.

It's not my intention or obligation to make a blanket practice of defending all OPs, or disbelieving all OPs. I call 'em like I see 'em. That's not speaking out of both sides of my mouth...it's called using my brain.

Nanny Taxi said...

It's been my experience that the AA's and the Jamaicans are the ones who will knock down an old lady for her social security check.

The nutcases who chop up families and store them in their freezer?
Those are the whites.

Why is it so hard for people to say no? It is because we are women, right? We are taught to be accommodating with everyone, except ourselves, we loathe ourselves.
Well, I learned early in life to say no, if not you will get walked on, i.e. the OP's employer.

Kristen said...

I have had a Jamaican Nanny for the past 5 years. I would not trade her for any other caregiver on the planet.

In my experience with Nannies, I've employed women from several cultures and honestly, there are bad seeds in every bunch.

It is our job as parents to screen them out based on references, experience, observation and qualifications.

To the OP: Your boss is an idiot. She allows these women to walk all over her, then she deserves what she gets.

My Nanny has been a godsend, she started living with us after the first year and I cannot imagine our household without her. My children love her and her daughter, and they are as much of a part of our family as an employee could possibly be.

She has great relationships with the other neighborhood nannies who are regular visitors to our home with their own charges, and is the best nanny our family has ever had.

We DO pay our Nanny top dollar, because she deserves it.

I am sorry for your bad experiences, however it has nothing to do with race or culture, and everything to do with your boss being a pushover and not establishing a proper employer/employee relationship.

Anonymous said...

I've not dealt with Jamaican Nanny, but a Jamaican Home Health Aide, which is WAY WORSE! She took COMPLETE advantage of my mother when she was in need of HELP. This woman took all the food, and asked my mother to sign off on the sheet that she was there for 6 hours when she was only there for 3 hours. She would ask my mother for all sorts of things in the house. Yes, she helped my mother but did NOT earn her pay AND felt entitled to things in the house, as she felt my mother had SOO much, and she should give ti to her. THEN, after 4 months, my mother's insurance no longer would pay for this woman to work, and poof she was gone. THEN this same woman happened to get work with a family friends mother, and it came back to my mother how the Jamaican woman badmouthed my mother....imagine that!!!

Miaka said...

For one, your boss sounds really dumb. For two, I was unaware that there are only three Jamaican nannies everywhere ever, which would be the only way this rant makes any sense.

To the dude who thinks that "AA" nannies are bad/attitudinal nannies, as a 23 year old one who has had steady nanny work since the age of 19, all with white families, you can kiss it.

Jade said...

I'm so sorry you've had such a bad experience. I'm pretty sure though that there has to be at least a hand full of jamaican nannies that do give 100%. Also, I am considered to be an overly nice person- but what your boss did giving her all that extra cash, was completely unacceptable. You shouldn't be nice to people who clearly are taking advantage of you. I'm also especially annoyed because I'm searching very hard to find a new position for our current nanny. She is WONDERFUL, so energetic, so engaged with our toddler. She is such a positive person, a positive influence, so it brings me to tears that I am having such a hard time finding her a job. And then I read this?? Please. I would of given all three of those nannies no more then a month's chance to prove themselves, then completely fired them with no gifts whatsoever. You sounded like a great nanny yourself though. I hope things are looking up for you, and hope you keep up with this blog. I will be following.

Anonymous said...

I agree with this comment here. All of these colored nannies have a sense of entitlement when more than half of them ( if not all) has not been schooled enough to even know the basics of good manners and right conduct. I see a lot of the. At the part mingling with their own kind ( not that it is bad) but often times they let their charges be everywhere . And when they see them doing something in appropriate they scream and holler at them at the top of their lungs!!!! I even saw one child fall and bruised himself. But I am sure this colored nanny would tell the parents it was the child’s fault since he won’t listen. And they ask for so much money- coming to work fully made up with long nails and thick foundation as if they were going to work in an office. Gee whiz what a .......!