Monday

So where are the nanny sightings?

Monday, February 16, 2009
We have had very few sighting in comparison to the number of sightings we had back in the first two years of operating the blog. It wasn't unusual back then to have two or three sightings per day. We invite you, our loyal readers and contributors to offer suggestions as to how you think we might better reach and impact those people who are in a position to see and report. You can leave your comments here and, if you are on Facebook, please add Jane here. The Facebook group is called, Nanny Watchers. Let's network.
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74 comments:

bella said...

I know this is OT but, jane, you are so pretty!

Emily said...

I love the blog and think you guys should keep up the good work--but exactly how is it a non-commercial blog when there are advertisements generating revenue?

Nanny Taxi said...

nanny sightings or not it sure has been lively around here!

Philly Nanny said...

Emily:

I doubt the ads provide much in the way of revenue. Hopefully they cover the cost of running the site, but it seems improbable that anyone is making a real profit from this site.

durrrr said...

Something is considered commerical when making a profit is the sole (or most important) reason for doing it. Generally things created for artistic or educational value and offered free to the public are considered non-commercial.

Chantel said...

Is there a facebook group for ISYN as well? I'd join that. Or a link I can add to my own blog?

Manhattan Mamma said...

Well Jane, let's think about your question.

Who here would want to post a sighting on a blog where there is a strong possiblilty the posting will be questioned, ridiculed, attacked or ignored.

I'm not trying to stir the pot or start a fight, I just honestly feel the blog has taken a definite turn, not neccessarily in a good direction.

I know the regulars are important, particularly those who have been loyal and around from the beginning. However I also think it might be wise to keep in mind that when a new person comes and posts an opinion, they should be treated with respect unless they behave like a troll. That same new comer is a person who will be out and about in town, perhaps in the playgorund or library, and spot a neglectful or abusive nanny. Which brings me back to the beginning of my post.

If you, Jane, were that new poster to a blog, and you had just been treated like something people scrape off the bottom of their shoe, would you go back and post anything on that blog again?

Also, unless the sighting is absolutely absurd, or without a shred of evidence supporting wrong-doing on the nannies part, one should ever question the validity or attack the person posting. Information spreads so quickly these days. And the reputation of the blog can suffer. And even if the post seems ridiculous or absurd, or lacking in information, the poster should not be made to feel foolish. Name calling should not be allowed, period. If someone resorts to direct name-calling, that post should immediately be removed with a warning. I think most here are intelligent enough to get their point across without changing people's monikers, calling them stupid or idiots or what not. Most schools nowadays have a zero tolerance policy for fighting. Meaning if two students are fist-fighting, both get suspended regardless of who started it. Perhaps this attitude would serve well here. Disagreements and lively discussion and debate should be encouraged, insults and name-calling should not be.

Again this is only my opinion offered because I presume it was wanted. It's not meant to upset anyone.

nc said...

What happened to the different features you all use to do? I know you did the X-mas one, but why not try and do a feature or two every month, on top of WTF. You did one on the Worst Nanny Experience before. You also had one on male child care providers. Just a thought.

Jane Doe said...

Emily,
A non-commercial enterprise is work that values other considerations above and beyond that of making a profit. ...
Wikipedia
(Like Durr said)


Manhattan Mama,
I couldn't agree with you more about sightings being questioned and ridiculed. I especially loathe when people I assume to be well intentioned are attacked simply for posting a nanny sighting.


Chantel,
For the code to link to I Saw Your Nanny, please email me. Or use Meebo to instant messenge MPP.


NC,
Absolutely. I'll consult with the legendary MPP and see if she has any ideas.

Jane Doe said...

Oh and Bella-
That was too kind!

Austin Nanny said...

I have to agree with Manhattan Mamma. Many of the nanny sightings on here have been reoundly attacked. I agree that sightings should not be subjected to the same criticism we give to the rants.

Kassi said...

Jane,

I don't have any bad nanny postings to offer, but I do have a different idea if you are looking to add content to the site. Maybe you could do a simple poll feature. I am always interested in the way others nannies spend their on the job time. The questions could be as simple as "how much do you make per hour (on average if you are salaried), and then you could offer options like less than $10, $10-$12, etc. You could ask how much housework are you responsible for or you could do polls with more substance like, have you ever stolen from your employer or has your boss ever hit on you, etc. If you'd like, I would be willing to write the questions and answer options so all you would have to do is input the info, if people seem interested.

Phoenix said...

It is human nature to second guess something. We are not going to beleive a post just because someone said it happened. With so many different perceptions and opinions there is going to be some sort of ridicule for someone's post. I agree we can be harsh and times, but trying to get your opinion across is how people do it. It's the same reflex when you talk to someone who doesn't speak English your first impulse is to speak slower and louder. It doesn't make them hear you better, but you are trying to use the communication tools at your disposal.
The truth is if someone can't take being ridiculed, then the internet is certaintly not the right place for them.

We may not be getting as many nanny sighting because, it's winter and they are all inside, and the economy is so bad people can't afford them. Or it could be that this blog scared all the bad nannies away, and now we are left with only good ones :).... (I would hope that would be true)

Mary said...

Has anyone ever "advertised" on craigslist? There's a possibility it would get flagged, but maybe not. There are a ton of moms and nannies on CL, as we have all seen from "CL, WTF?".

I also think a facebook group would be great if there's not already one.

Maybe offer and advertisement to nanny agencies or other local "moms" networks. I can add a note to a local "moms" website I visit (I'm a nanny). If everyone who reads this blog helps get the word out in any way they can, I'm sure that would help. There are a bunch of us.

CaliGal said...

Perhaps it's a good thing. Maybe you've impacted the nanny world so much that nannies are a lot less neglectful. You've had a few good "busts", where parents saw postings about their nannies on this site. Maybe that's changed things.

As for posting our salaries, a lot of us have done that and only get riduculed if we make over $50,000 a year.

Not Enough Moms said...

I know this view will be unpopular, but I think the reason the site gets lets nanny sightings is because it has become something that I believe is quite different from its original goal.

It is now comprised of almost entirely nannies, very few moms post on here. I used to come much more often, but as the comments and often the rants have become virtually all nanny complaining I have lost interest. The WTF feature is yet another nanny complaining session where, every week without fail, everyone bemoans the offerred hours and pay. I've said before that there is nothing wrong with a nanny website dedicated to nannies sharing work stories, but I don't come to ISYN for that.

You will get many more bad nanny sightings from concerned moms than nannies, simply because we are more likely to be outraged and less likely to feel comaraderie with the offender. I used to see lots of ISYN links on UB and YBM, which I believe are the best sources to reach moms who would read this blog. But I haven't seen many links in ages.

So my only suggestion is to make a concerted effort to reach parents not just nannies. CL ads are fine, but again you will find mostly nannies looking for work on there. I suggest posting interesting sightings on UB and YBM and even an occasional semi-spam post on there requesting sightings.

Idon'tevenknowwhatmonikerIusedlast said...

Advertise in the free "family" mags that every city has, and I guarantee you you will get more sightings.

Allowing comments on sighting posts *does* make some people scared to comment, me among them. I am a SAHM and I have posted here before but only a really really bad sighting. I have held my tongue on less extreme sightings because I don't want to be flamed.

Maybe keep the comments on the CL-WTF threads or other threads discussing nanny/childcare issues and just let the sightings stand alone with no comments, just an e-mail address for the parents to contact Jane if they want more info. Of course the parents can post a "thank you" or Jane can let the blog readership know if the parents contact her or if there is some other update on the sighting.

It's nice that anonymous postings are deleted but the snark and subtle flaming is hard to moderate, so I suggest you be more selective of which posts have comments enabled.

Idon'tevenknowwhatmonikerIusedlast said...

One other way to get traffic, comment on widely read blogs such as dooce.com and Celebrity Baby Blog and on mom message boards like Baby Center, but not spam posts, you have to at least be nominally a member of the "community" to get credibility. But if Jane or MPP have the time to participate online in places where moms (and nannies) congregate, and you put the blog address in your comments (where allowed), you will get more traffic and ISYN will become more widely known.

I hope it does become more widely known. At the moment there is a pretty low chance that if someone posts here the parent will see the posting. Possible, it happens, but if the blog had a higher profile it could be a much more useful service.

I know that if I employed a nanny I would check this site all the time, but parents can't check if they don't know it exists.

Jane Doe said...

I like the idea about not allowing comments on nanny sightings. There are plenty of perspective and opinion type threads for people to comment. Thank you for the idea!

I'm a Mom said...

It's so nice to see suggestions by posters on how to make things better around here instead of barking at each other. I like the idea of leaving the nanny sightings to stand on their own. Seriously, why would it need our input? It would be mostly negative anyway.

I also think having another permanent weekly feature to the blog in addition to CL would be nice. I like having things to look forward to, especially on the days it may be a little slow around here.

Keep up the great work!

Jumpstarter said...

so i guess what u are saying jane is that because there have been no sightings that you are encouraging others to do what? make up something, stalk anyone who looks like a nanny, harass others until you can get a real good sighting. Very nice. There are horrible nannies out there every day but if no one reports them then you have no sighting, thats all there is to it

duh said...

Jumpstarter, now where in the hell did that come from? Why do you have to be such an ass? You've completely missed the point here! As some posters have so kindly suggested, specifically Idon'tevenknowwhatmonikerIusedlas - Jane is asking to network here. If people don't know about ISYN, there obviously won't be as many sightings. Trust me, there are bad nannies EVERYWHERE! they are not hiding! We need to get the word out and THEN there will be more sightings.

Idiot.

Manhattan Nanny said...

I agree with Manhattan Mommy. Although I think the discourse has become more civil now that monikers are required, I would like to see posts with outright name calling deleted. Lively discussions and differing points of view add to the interest of the site; nasty personal attacks drive people away.

The lack of sightings must have something to do with the bitter cold winter in some parts. There have been days when my charges and I were the only ones in the playground, and we didn't last long!

honest nanny said...

"You will get many more bad nanny sightings from concerned moms than nannies, simply because we are more likely to be outraged and less likely to feel comaraderie with the offender."

THIS STATEMENT IS 100% FALSE! I am a nanny and I get OUTRAGED when I see abuse in any capacity, whether it be parent or nanny. Just because I'm a nanny does not mean that I'm not going to "rat" on another nanny who isn't doing her job. BAH! This really hit an anger nerve in me. I get what you are saying [Not Enough Moms] and agree that having more parents on here would be helpful for opinions and to make sure THEIR nanny isn't posted as negligent. (next time avoid stereotypes)

In response to Manhattan Mamma, I agree that name calling shouldn't be allowed (though even I have thrown out a name or two) but I also think its important to remember that the line of censorship is not always black and white, especially on a blog of opinions. It would be hard for someone to be that "mediator."

I think word of mouth about this site is helpful. If you are at the park with other moms/nannies tell them about this forum. I've even told my boss about it! :) I'm hoping someone sites me being a GREAT nanny and she reads it!

Not Enough Moms said...

honest nanny,

No, the statement is 100% true. I think you are seriously deluding yourself if you think that nannies are equally as likely as parents to report a negligent nanny. This is universally true in all professions that there is some unwritten code or rule that it is considered the last resort to report a colleague. It even has a label in some professions ("blue code of silence" comes to mind for police officers, though I know I've heard others as well). I've seen this personally amongst lawyers, doctors, nannies, daycare workers, doormen, nurses, postmen, and teachers - and that's just the ones I've personally seen.

It's very naive to think that the impulse to protect ones' own does not exist because it absolutely does. That does not mean that NO nannies would ever report other nannies as we have obviously seen on this site. It doesn't mean that good nannies are not outraged by abuse. It does not mean any other superlative, unfounded conclusion you might draw. But it does mean that parents are more likely to report a nanny than other nannies are, whether you are able to come to terms with this reality or not.

Quick Reality Check said...

Not Enough Moms,

I would challenge you to provide hard evidence for your claims.

All you have now is conjecture and there are two things about conjecture:

1. By the same coin, the same reasoning, it could be said parents are less likely to report negligent parents than nannies.

2. However well reasoned, it remains anecdotal and hardly 100% anything.

With respect of course.

Won'tUseTheSameMonikerTwice said...

I agree with Not Enough Moms. I used to comment regularly and even posted a few times--two questionable nanny sightings a few general questions. My last posting was a very personal issue. I have a thick skin, but was hurt by some of the responses to the latter to the point I left this blog for months. I have become much more a reader than active participant and I won't post a nanny sighting unless it is blatent (and honestly that is not what most sightings are--if I witnessed clear abuse I would be on the phone with the police, not posting here, but the more "gray" areas are what is attacked here). I don't know if you have lost your "Moms" or if they have just become occasional readers as I have, but I like the idea of not allowing, or severely restriction comments on nanny sightings to posts relevant to identifying or contacting the parent.

ro said...

Jumpstarter,
What are you reading?

Idiot.

Not Enough Moms said...

honest nanny/Quick Reality Check,

I doubt "hard evidence" - in the form of double-blind, controlled, randomized data - exists in regards to nannies/parents and reporting to the ISYN website. Unfortunately, it just hasn't been around that long, but it's cute that you think such data would even be possible already.

Here are a couple of links to some basic studies to support this phenomenon in both police work:

http://www.informaworld.com/smpp/content~content=a713729144

and medicine (original abstract and NYT summary):

http://www.annals.org/cgi/content/abstract/147/11/795

http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2007/12/03/how-professional-is-your-doctor/

I'm sure you are perfectly capable of doing some basic google searches yourself on any other profession you might be interested in, though as I said above, I doubt you'll find any studies for ISYN. However, I think it's more than reasonable to make this extrapolation especially as I doubt you'll find any studies to contradict the peer/colleague bias either.

I would agree that a nanny would be more likely to report a negligent mom than a fellow mom would be, by the same reasoning above. However, I think a review of the ISYN sightings will show that the majority are caregivers and not parents - though certainly abusive parents should be reported also.

I actually don't understand why this concept makes you feel so defensive. It is not a personal attack on you, merely a suggestion for how we can increase Mom traffic on the blog and possibly increase sightings in general. Although we all agree that ANY bad parent/nanny deserves a sighting, the blog is called I Saw Your NANNY for a reason!

lauren said...

I think you are correct. Sure, there are a small group of nannies who take pride in their job and raising the children to be great, well adjusted people. These nannies would be offended at some nanny neglecting her charge.

I think a large percentage of nannies would find a reason to justify it. She was probably tired, her boss is probably a bitch, the kid is a bratt, she shouldn't be working on a Sunday anyway. etc. etc. Nannies put themselves in the nannies position.

Moms put themselves in the position of a mother, what if this was my child.

That is what you all need to ask yourselves, "what if this was MY child".

9 times out of 10, the offending actions wouldn't be kosher.

I need to go and join the facebook group now. Spring is coming and more people will be outside!

Jane Doe said...

In the future, comments will be closed to all nanny sightings, unless the submitter wishes the comments to be enabled.

All nanny sighting will end with,
"if you have questions or comments about this sighting, please contact Jane directly at isayournanny@aol.com .

I love all of the suggestions and thank you all for your input. In reference to CL, we usually hit them at least once a week. I know UB, but what is YLB?

Not Enough Moms said...

YBM is youbemom.com, the message board that essentially took over for urbanbaby after it was acquired by cnet and the format changed so drastically.

YBM is now like the old UB with lots of improvements (moves very, very fast; tons of posts; national audience). UB is now mostly a NYC schools board with a much slower pace and minimal posts compared to YBM.

FWIW, I think disabling comments for sightings is a great idea with the option to still contact the OP with questions or clarifications, and definitely give readers an update if a sighting ends with a "solved" mystery. Thanks!

Emily said...

Thanks for the clarification, Jane. I'd not realized that.

worlds best nanny said...

I can't believe we cannot comment on nanny sightings. Just because someone disagrees with you doesn't make them a flaming troll! To be perfectly honest most of the flaming and name calling on here comes from the mommies, who shall remain nameless, ahem.......CaliMom

Jacqui said...

This blog has become nannies vs mommies. It's pretty ridiculous.
Both parties are to blame.

It's a shame that sightings are going to be closed to comments though. Maybe I haven't been paying attention, but it seems like the flaming is completely under control now that monikers are required.

Oh and I agree and disagree with the issue about nannies remaining loyal to each other and not reporting bad nannies as much as a mommy would. I rarely ever see bad nannies (I see more negligent mommies in fact), but if I did I would be inclined to report her on this site. It seems as though a lot of the bad nanny sightings are in the cities and involve nannies from countries other than the US. Those nannies are probably less likely to report each other and HAVE developed a sort of camaradarie. It doesn't make bad behavior excusable but it does put this entire issue into perspective. A lot of the moms who report here and/or are convinced the majority of nannies are bad, probably come across many nannies who are migrant type workers, coming here to earn a paycheck, doing whatever they are "qualified" to do at the time. On the flip side, a lot of the American nannies you find really have a passion for childcare. A lot of us could EASILY get other jobs, but we choose to take care of children, not because we're limited to that type of job, but because we truly love it. So of course we get VERY defensive when we hear nannies as a WHOLE, being badmouthed.
That's not to say there aren't bad American nannies. Of course there are...and there also wonderful nannies that AREN'T American. But there definitely IS a significant cultural difference and in order to see it, we all have to look at the bigger picture and put ourselves in eachothers' shoes.

Thanks ... said...

Manhattan Mamma, I couldn't agree more. There is a lack of respect for people on this forum from certain individuals that is beyond juvenile. I don't encourage or support censorship, and I've a very thick skin, but would I recommend this blog to anyone after my brief experience with it? No way!

Could my opinion of this community change in time, possibly. Do I think my impression of ISYN matters to anyone here? Probably not. However, first impressions are often the strongest and longest lasting and I'm certain I can't be the only person turned off by the behavior of a select few.

Thanks for asking, Jane.

honest nanny said...

Jaquie:

Thank you, you stated my sentiments accurately. I do feel like many mommies on here have a bad impression of nannies and that offends me because you are stereotyping me into that group - without even realizing it.

I'm a damn good nanny, I'm proud to be a nanny. I love my kids and I love my families. If I witnessed abuse by anyone I would report it and have had to legally report it as a mandated reporter (I'm also a Social Worker). I'm sorry that some of these mommies on here have had such bad experience with or sightings of bad nannies. I hope that the lack of sightings means it is happening less.

All I was suggesting to you [Not Enough Moms] is to avoid stereotypes, I'm not arguing with you over your theories.

Manhattan Nanny said...

Nannies are not colleagues in the sense that police, or doctors are. We don't work together. We don't stand to benefit from a "wall of silence", quite the opposite. I am very critical of those I consider lazy or negligent, because they contribute to a negative image of a profession I love and take seriously. I certainly don't identify with them, and I want them out of the profession, because one, I care about the welfare of children, and two, nannies as a group will be more respected with the bad apples gone.

chesapeake said...

Perhaps you should change your motto of this site to something other than "REPORT BAD NANNIES".

Why do you focus on such negativity. Why not focus on a possible good nanny? How about changing it to "REPORT NANNIES" or something as such.

Maybe just maybe nannies aren't so bad after all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

etereia said...

I agree with Manhattan Nanny. I am a nanny and I do not cover for negligent or abusive nannies, because they give a horrible name to all of us. In the last five years, I have worked very hard to establish trust and good relationships with the families I work for (yes, mommies, who do not like immigrants, I came from another country, and no, I am not uneducated or illiterate). Sorry about going on a tangent here, but I get very upset with the rude and ignorant comments about "all the illegal baby-sitters" who flock to America to steal the jobs of the American citizens.

all eyes said...

Not Enough Moms,

"I would agree that a nanny would be more likely to report a negligent mom than a fellow mom would be, by the same reasoning above. However, I think a review of the ISYN sightings will show that the majority are caregivers and not parents."

No, you have it backwards. A review of ISYN sightings will show that a majority of ISYN sightings are of caregivers, but from that you can't extrapolate anything more than that there are more reports of bad caregivers on this single blog.

You cannot compare the two groups, which would seem to be what you're bent on doing. In fact this could be indicative that parents are even less likely to report other parents than nannies are to report other nannies just as much as it could be the other way around.

If I had to guess why, if that were the case, I would guess this would be in part because intervening in the care of another's child is seen as nosy while reporting the negligence of an employee is almost virtuous.

The point is, for your argument that moms are less likely to feel camaraderie with the offender and nannies more, there exists zero evidence specific to the profession and situation, we're not police officers or doctors, we rarely can identify one another. And just as easily look, I made the opposite argument. That's what they challenged you to find and striking back with a you can google it yourself mentality when the burden of proof is on you is not the best way to go. With respect, I sincerely doubt they wanted double-blind, controlled, etc.

That said, the little comment you did to honest nanny and Quick Reality Check about being "cute" was demeaning and is in my humble opinion a personal attack in clear violation of ISYN policy. Were I them, I would be deeply offended.

seattle said...

lauren:

i understand your reasoning in that a nanny puts herself in the nanny's shoes, the mother puts herself in the mothers shoes...

but did you ever stop to think that there are MANY nannies who are ALSO mothers?

i doubt it.

and to be perfectly honest... (though this is just me personally) i want to be the best at what i do. the *BEST*. better than you, and better than everyone else. its just my way of motivating myself.

so no matter what job i'm doing... i'm not going to 'protect' someone else who is doing a bad job as it goes unnoticed by my employer.

i mean excuse me, but i work damn hard. and it's insulting to see someone else slide by rules. i absolutely won't allow it.

so aside from it being completely unacceptable to treat children poorly, i would report someone because quite frankly: they don't deserve any positive recognition that they may be getting, and it outrages me they think they are in any way deserving of that recognition if they're going to treat their charges poorly.

i know, i'm competitive. but i like it. and i doubt im the only one.

and there's no reason to comment on nanny sightings. good going for removing that.

seattle said...

oh and i agree with "all eyes" that the comment about being "cute" was completely rude and condescending.

get a pin and pop that ego of yours.

bella said...

chesapeake, Jane isn't running this site just for sport. She welcomes the rare "good nanny sighting", but the whole purpose of it is to "out bad nannies". I'm sure she has no intention of changing it. It's all about helping and keeping children safe. Just because there aren't any sightings lately, it doesn't mean the world has been rid of these awful slugs... it is because people are afraid to 1. get involved 2. report here out of fear of being flamed 3. it's too damn cold out and not very many nannies and their charges are running all over the playgrounds.

Trust me, Jane's job will never be done.

student said...

In this thread alone Not Enough Moms has said:

1. Most posters on ISYN are nannies.

2. Most sightings are of bad nannies.

3. Nannies are less likely to report bad nannies than are mothers.

I'm sorry, but Logic 101, you can't reach 3 from 1 and 2. At least, I know my professor would have failed me had I tried.

too tired said...

i'm too tired to read the whole thread above, but the logic in the last one makes no sense at all.

sorry student but 1,2, and 3 can all exist independently. 3 is not dependent on 1 and 2. it's not even related.

whether the posters are moms or nannies does not in any way logically lead you to be able to conclude which group is more likely to report the other. you could change any one of your 3 statments to the opposite and it would not affect any of the others.

i don't even care what the argument is about, but i hate faulty logic!

student said...

too tired,

When you're not tired anymore, I would suggest you review what you just said.

You will find my logic is sound.

1. "whether the posters are moms or nannies does not in any way logically lead you to be able to conclude which group is more likely to report the other"

is exactly my point. As I said, you can't get to 3 from 1 and 2.

2. "i don't even care what the argument is about, but i hate faulty logic!"

Explain to me how likely it is for most posters to be nannies, most sightings to be bad nannies and for nannies to be less likely to report bad nannies.

Pretty darn remote, isn't it?

All the best.

WTF? said...

Personally, I love reading the comments. If there are going to be less, I'll check the blog less, I'd imagine. It's everyone's comments that keep me checking a few times a day.

I am not a nanny, nor do I employ one, however, I'd definitely report a bad nanny if I saw one.

all eyes said...

WTF?,

As should we all, nanny, parent or other like you. :)

all eyes said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
seattle said...

i think a major issue is that most people (myself included) don't know how to argue or discuss without using their emotions. or they know but they choose not to, because everyone likes that "i'm right, you're wrong" feeling.

it ends up being an "i'm-smarter-than-you" competition. and a who sides with who.

honestly, i read one comment and go "yeah that completely makes sense"

then a read a rebuttle and think "oh, okay, now THAT makes sense too"

then the first person replies and again, im thinking "well they do make a point"

and so it goes.

honest nanny said...

seattle,

I DO THAT TOO! haha. sometimes i don't know what i think in the end and have nothing to say. :) i like the banter back and forth - my husband is always asking me what i'm laughing at while on the computer. I quite literally LOL.

seattle said...

honest nanny-

haha! im glad im not alone! i didn't think i was, though.

i usually stop caring once it's gone back and forth a few rounds.

when there are really heated arguments though, i check back RELIGIOUSLY. same thing when someone asks a question and everyone gives input, i LOVE hearing back from the OP to see what ended up happening. it actually really irritates me when they post a question, and then you never hear from them again even after 103 people have responded.

Here's a few ideas... said...

Have a "perspectives" feature weekly with different topics (and authors?) and of course let us comment! That's where the fun is!

Possible topics for 1 week:
-Celebrity nannies (anyone who has done this, stories about current nannies, gossip about Hollywood kids and their nannies... we know they're supposed to be out of the spotlight, but people might like to find out and talk about how these nannies get their jobs, what they do, and I bet others are as nosey as me!
-Nanny/Employer Confessions: Nannies and Employers fess up (UnIdentified!) to their worst incidents (non illegal/abusive ones hopefully!!!)
-International Nannies... tales from U.S. Nannies that have worked overseas (again, just to be nosey and see how temp/vacation jobs overseas are...)
-Crazy applicant stories from employers, describing the worst applicants they had for their nanny job (would be really nice if it was someone who wrote about it while they are actually going through the process of hiring a nanny = we could all follow the drama along if there's any!)

I guess I just like reading the gossipy, opinion stuff on here, and I love reading other people's comments. I know it's focusing on bad nanny sightings, but I feel like anything pertaining to Nannying or hiring is fair game to discuss on here.

To increase traffic, if you nominate someone for CL WTF, post that on your CL Child Care web page, and that's going to get people's curiousity up (we all know CL Childcare likes to get the flaming and arguments going).

Maybe 1 of these ideas will help.

Scary Blu ray said...

seattle,

One thing that bothers me is not the assumption that everyone likes the "I'm right, you're wrong" feeling, but the implied assumption that everyone likes it all the time.

Don't get me wrong, given the right set of circumstances, I'm human. I'll take some pride in bringing down someone off their high horse, and arguably at the same time put myself on one. Although in my defense I would note, I don't gloat, rather my pride is expressed usually through a little oh yeah sort of dance I do in private.

But I don't always care for "winning". In fact, usually I care more for the accuracy of something, the truth of the matter. That's the win I'm most interested in. I know what people think when they hear others say that, but for me it is very true.

I like being shown that I'm wrong, especially when folks lay it out with as little emotion as possible. I enjoy learning.

Anyway, I should stop rambling and get to the point. On the Internet I love to talk and my typing speed is such that it is all too easy for me to be long winded.

However, don't be mistaken, and at the same time please don't be offended, but I care more for why my Blu ray player says "See you" instead of "Good bye" then what anyone ever says on ISYN or any part of the Internet.

I have to wonder, is it watching me?

Scary Blu ray said...

student,

You got the form wrong, but I see where you were trying to go.

too tired,

Student is right in his or her sentiment.

Which is more likely?

A. Most posters are nannies, most posts are about bad nannies and nannies are less likely than mothers to post about bad nannies.

or

B. Most posters are nannies, most posts are about bad nannies and nannies are just as likely as mothers to post about bad nannies.

It would seem to me baring extraordinary evidence to the contrary that B is the common sense given.

Not Enough Moms said...

Here's a Few Ideas,

Those are great ideas! Your thoughts and removing comments from nanny sightings would definitely increase blog traffic and keep folks around.

all eyes/honest nannyquick reality check (since I suspect at least some of these posts are the same person given the exact same posting format and repeated use of "with respect" and other syntax):

Okay, it seems really important for you to believe you are right on this one. So let's just operate under the theory that your ideas are correct:

-There is no such thing as a peer/colleague bias among nannies, unlike all other professions.
-Nannies feel no comaraderie toward each other and no desire to defend each other.
-Nannies are even more likely than Moms to report a negligent nanny because they are especially outraged at the behavior.
-Moms are commenting and posting on ISYN just as much as nannies.

So you can be right on all the above, okay. You can "win" and get a gold medal!

But guess what? I still think increasing Mom traffic on this blog would greatly increase bad nanny sightings. And I still think that more outreach to get parents aware of and posting on this blog would be in the best interest of the children we are trying to protect.

all eyes said...

Not Enough Moms,

1. I'm not honest nanny or Quick Reality Check. You will find use of this moniker in other threads as well as honest nanny, as I know I've seen that moniker before. I have no idea nor really care who Quick Reality Check is. In fact, more to the point, I don't believe it really matters who is who.

2. "There is no such thing as a peer/colleague bias among nannies, unlike all other professions. Nannies feel no comaraderie toward each other and no desire to defend each other."

You cited doctors and police officers, two of thousands of professions in the world. Nannies are nothing like doctors and police officers, we can rarely identify one another if ever. In fact, more to the point in all my years at this, I've never identified another nanny. The idea then that I would be more defensive of their negligence falls flat on its face.

3. "Nannies are even more likely than Moms to report a negligent nanny because they are especially outraged at the behavior."

I did not say that, nor did they and you know that. Shame on you.

4. "Moms are commenting and posting on ISYN just as much as nannies."

That wasn't the point. The point is what Scary Blu ray said:

"Which is more likely?

A. Most posters are nannies, most posts are about bad nannies and nannies are less likely than mothers to post about bad nannies.

or

B. Most posters are nannies, most posts are about bad nannies and nannies are just as likely as mothers to post about bad nannies."

5. "You can "win" and get a gold medal!"

With respect, and guess what more than one person in this world of 6.7 billion uses that phrase, you seem to be the only one bent on winning anything here. However let us all remember, everyone else has to be me, a single person, all monikers must be me, because save one exception (lauren) no one seems to be backing you up here.

6. "But guess what? I still think increasing Mom traffic on this blog would greatly increase bad nanny sightings."

Did I say anything to the contrary? If I did, I don't recall it. I'm all for increasing Mom traffic, but I'm also all for increasing all traffic. I believe it is good for nannies, parents and even non parents to see and report these sightings. Please stick to one "war".

Thanks.

Not Enough Moms said...

So defensive again?

I already said you won. No need to keep defending all the points that were already conceded to you.

You've got me curious now, though. I wonder how long you will feel the need to continue to reply to my posts with attempts to prove your intelligence and logic. If I post one word, will you post a paragraph? How about if I post a sentence, do I get a page in reply?You are a little mini-experiment toward building ISYN data.

And, sorry to disappoint you again, but I don't care how many people post replies that agree or disagree with me. I recognize the vast limitations of an anonymous blog so I do not view any of the comments here as necessary for personal validation. I'm confident enough in my opinion to be the ONLY person in the whole wide world who thinks this way.

all eyes said...

Not Enough Moms,

1. "I already said you won. No need to keep defending all the points that were already conceded to you."

No, you were sarcastic and condescending. You offered me a gold medal don't you recall? You may as well have offered a gold star or a sticker. You have yet to apologize about the cute comment to honest nanny and Quick Reality Check, and instead have opted to continue the use of the same crass attitude against anyone who dares to contradict you.

2. "I wonder how long you will feel the need to continue to reply to my posts with attempts to prove your intelligence and logic."

Need I be so cliche as to say so said the kettle to the pot? You're not separate from us, stop thinking you are. You continue to respond even though you freely admit the futility of it. This isn't about me, it's about you.

3. "I don't care how many people post replies that agree or disagree with me... I'm confident enough in my opinion to be the ONLY person in the whole wide world who thinks this way."

What you really are saying is that you don't care what we think and will continue regardless of what we say. Then I have two questions for you, one where are you on the political spectrum and two, why continue to respond?

Better yet, perhaps it'd be best not to respond? After all, the futility of it is so clear.

With love.

seattle said...

all eyes:

you are my new favorite. and i completely agree with you.

cali mom said...

Seattle - yes, I must say, I am certainly enjoying his eloquence!

cali mom said...

And I agree with you also about the experience of reading all the back and forth opinions sometimes.

NEM said...

I love how you enumerate everything. It's very cute. I'm glad to offer you a star or sticker if you prefer. You can even pick your favorite color.

You are correct. I do not care what you think. As I said before, the opinions of a random poster on an anonymous blog have no impact on my life. Opinons of people I have some actual relationship with that is built on mutual respect are meaningful to me. Unfortunately you do not fit into that category, but I can pretend to care about your opinions if it is important to you. I definitely do not think this exchange is futile at all - it's incredibly useful to me. You make me chuckle and that is very valuable in these difficult times. Sorry to burst your bubble, but I do not think it is daring to contradict me. I don't think it takes courage to have an anonymous argument on a blog.

I respond to see your replies and will continue to do so as long as it is fun. You are my internet entertainment for a few days, at least until a more interesting rant or rave takes your place.
I hope you will continue your entertaining responses and your attempts to win the approval of the ISYN readership simply because I'm enjoying myself.

I truly find it to be an interesting study in human behavior to take on different viewpoints under different monikers (often at the same time, better be careful : ) and see how people rally to support and criticize based on simple changes in word choice and tone. It is bewildering to me how seriously people like yourself take an exchange on an anonymous internet blog so personally, having no actual knowledge of any of the posters. Perhaps tomorrow I'll post under 6 different monikers: 3 telling you how wonderful, witty, smart, and righteous you are; 3 agreeing with my current post. Pay attention to how you feel validated, then attacked and then realize how absolutely silly it is to get personally offended by this. Be sure to post back often and keep me updated on your emotions, all the while trying to employ lots of enumeration, quotes, rhetorical questions, witty one liners, and probing personal revelations about me. Thanks!

NES said...

I just want to apologize for my childishness. I just realized how my low self-esteem is affecting me, because I feel the need to make myself out to be better than other people. I know that I'm not, and I look forward to reading your replies because I have nothing else to do with my time.

I tend to have major mood swings and will probably regret apologizing, but I really was acting like a brat.

Sorry, ISYN.

firsttimecaller said...

I agree with Manhattan Mamma.

worlds best nanny said...

For all intent and purpose, I am considered a "bad nanny" because I stole some medication from my employer.
I spend a lot of days with nannies and daycare providers, and I would report and abusive one in a heartbeat. Yes I do feel some sense of camaraderie with my fellow child care providers, but anyone who would hurt a child is no friend of mine.

honest nanny said...

I almost hate that I go to bed so early cause when I check the blog in the morning so much has happened!!!

nes, I agreed with you about the usefulness of more mom traffic! so thanks for letting me "win" on all the other points. now I do believe we agree on everything! hi friend! :) when do I get my gold medal?

about me using more than one moniker here: I don't need to create other personalities to prove a point. honest nanny is sure enough in herself to be honest nanny - and it show up automatically now when I post. I don't have time or energy to jugle more than one person.

and if you disagree with someone's post obviously they are going to defend their view. its called a debate!

Jacqui said...

Wow NotEnoughMoms, you're beating a dead horse and alleyes is really the only one who seems to be keeping her cool and making ANY sort of sense. Can you agree to disagree without getting nasty, juvenile and sarcastic? Because that's all this is...a difference in opinions. Getting angry and defensive is futile.

bella said...

Count "all eyes" among one of my favs, too! I absolutely love the candor with which he speaks!

You Just Proved NEM's Point said...

and you wonder where the Moms are? Just read how this post degraded. Why would a Mom want to post anything here?

Jacqui said...

So, unless someone has the word MOM in their moniker or states that she IS a mom, we have to assume the rest of the posters are nannies? Talk about faulty logic.
I guess we also have to assume a mom is above the back and forth banter and it's only the lowly nannies (who may not even be nannies) that are partaking in such crude, crass behavior.

A few of the nannies on this blog are also moms. A lot of the posters don't specify WHO they are, so we have no way to tell...and there are mommies and nannies alike on here, who stir the pot equally.

Why bother starting a mom/nanny war, youjustproved?
Instigating THAT (which is what you're doing) is the type of behavior you're looking down upon.

bella said...

Jacqui said...

"So, unless someone has the word MOM in their moniker or states that she IS a mom, we have to assume the rest of the posters are nannies? Talk about faulty logic."

You actually bring up a very good point! I would really like to see some kind of POLL on this blog so that we could find out exactly what the Mom to Nanny ratio is. I'm sure I wouldn't be the only one curious to see this.

happy said...

Rebuttle? Rofl! Thank you, you've made my day.