I saw a nanny yesterday (8/5) at the Franklin Institute in Philly, and just felt sick to me stomach as I saw the way the child treated her. She had 2 children with her, probably about 8 or 9 years old each. One was an Asian girl, the other a Caucasian boy. I was a camp group leader and this nanny and her charges (brother and sister? friends?) were with us in an exhibit, and also saw them later in the day. The boy was outright rude and mean to the nanny, yelling and hitting her, making threats, dragging the little girl around, cutting in front of other children at the hands on exhibits. I had to tell him several times to please wait his turn as there was a line of my campers waiting patiently to try some of the sporting equipment. The nanny tried her best to control him, reason with him, and be firm, but this boy ignored her and made terrible threats. I felt so bad for her as she seemed at a complete loss of what to do, and like this was 'the usual.' The little girl did not cry or complain when he treated her poorly or bossed her around, and even tried to reason with him that he needed to listen to the nanny. I saw them later in the bathroom where the boy was hitting himself to make a mark on his head so he could tell his parents that his nanny hit him. And then one last time in the store as we were all leaving. He kept hitting her and making horrible remarks about her and his father. Some of my campers were asking me what was wrong with him and why he was treating someone like that, and I didn't have a clue. As she was trying to help the little girl pick out a toy and manage the boy (who was trying to destroy items in the store), I went over to her and asked if she needed any help. She politely declined and said that they were leaving shortly. She gave the little girl money to buy a toy, and took the little boy outside the store to wait. She spoke calmly to him, which pretty much makes her a saint in my book because I was ready to step in and handle that child! If this is your nanny and you let your son treat her like this, you don't deserve her! You need to seriously examine how you've let your child think its ok to treat other people like that! If I could afford a nanny I would snatch her up in a second because she obviously has a lot of patience to deal with all that. The nanny was probably in her early 20's, caucasian, with straight brown hair in a pony tail, and petite. She was wearing a blue shirt and khaki shorts. The little girl had a similar colored shirt and shorts. The little boy was wearing an all-brown outfit with a spider on it (I made a remark to him joking about him having a tarantula on his back) and a hat (kind of like a cowboy hat).
Wednesday
Franklin Institute in Philadelphia, PA
Received Wednesday, August 6, 2008
I saw a nanny yesterday (8/5) at the Franklin Institute in Philly, and just felt sick to me stomach as I saw the way the child treated her. She had 2 children with her, probably about 8 or 9 years old each. One was an Asian girl, the other a Caucasian boy. I was a camp group leader and this nanny and her charges (brother and sister? friends?) were with us in an exhibit, and also saw them later in the day. The boy was outright rude and mean to the nanny, yelling and hitting her, making threats, dragging the little girl around, cutting in front of other children at the hands on exhibits. I had to tell him several times to please wait his turn as there was a line of my campers waiting patiently to try some of the sporting equipment. The nanny tried her best to control him, reason with him, and be firm, but this boy ignored her and made terrible threats. I felt so bad for her as she seemed at a complete loss of what to do, and like this was 'the usual.' The little girl did not cry or complain when he treated her poorly or bossed her around, and even tried to reason with him that he needed to listen to the nanny. I saw them later in the bathroom where the boy was hitting himself to make a mark on his head so he could tell his parents that his nanny hit him. And then one last time in the store as we were all leaving. He kept hitting her and making horrible remarks about her and his father. Some of my campers were asking me what was wrong with him and why he was treating someone like that, and I didn't have a clue. As she was trying to help the little girl pick out a toy and manage the boy (who was trying to destroy items in the store), I went over to her and asked if she needed any help. She politely declined and said that they were leaving shortly. She gave the little girl money to buy a toy, and took the little boy outside the store to wait. She spoke calmly to him, which pretty much makes her a saint in my book because I was ready to step in and handle that child! If this is your nanny and you let your son treat her like this, you don't deserve her! You need to seriously examine how you've let your child think its ok to treat other people like that! If I could afford a nanny I would snatch her up in a second because she obviously has a lot of patience to deal with all that. The nanny was probably in her early 20's, caucasian, with straight brown hair in a pony tail, and petite. She was wearing a blue shirt and khaki shorts. The little girl had a similar colored shirt and shorts. The little boy was wearing an all-brown outfit with a spider on it (I made a remark to him joking about him having a tarantula on his back) and a hat (kind of like a cowboy hat).
I saw a nanny yesterday (8/5) at the Franklin Institute in Philly, and just felt sick to me stomach as I saw the way the child treated her. She had 2 children with her, probably about 8 or 9 years old each. One was an Asian girl, the other a Caucasian boy. I was a camp group leader and this nanny and her charges (brother and sister? friends?) were with us in an exhibit, and also saw them later in the day. The boy was outright rude and mean to the nanny, yelling and hitting her, making threats, dragging the little girl around, cutting in front of other children at the hands on exhibits. I had to tell him several times to please wait his turn as there was a line of my campers waiting patiently to try some of the sporting equipment. The nanny tried her best to control him, reason with him, and be firm, but this boy ignored her and made terrible threats. I felt so bad for her as she seemed at a complete loss of what to do, and like this was 'the usual.' The little girl did not cry or complain when he treated her poorly or bossed her around, and even tried to reason with him that he needed to listen to the nanny. I saw them later in the bathroom where the boy was hitting himself to make a mark on his head so he could tell his parents that his nanny hit him. And then one last time in the store as we were all leaving. He kept hitting her and making horrible remarks about her and his father. Some of my campers were asking me what was wrong with him and why he was treating someone like that, and I didn't have a clue. As she was trying to help the little girl pick out a toy and manage the boy (who was trying to destroy items in the store), I went over to her and asked if she needed any help. She politely declined and said that they were leaving shortly. She gave the little girl money to buy a toy, and took the little boy outside the store to wait. She spoke calmly to him, which pretty much makes her a saint in my book because I was ready to step in and handle that child! If this is your nanny and you let your son treat her like this, you don't deserve her! You need to seriously examine how you've let your child think its ok to treat other people like that! If I could afford a nanny I would snatch her up in a second because she obviously has a lot of patience to deal with all that. The nanny was probably in her early 20's, caucasian, with straight brown hair in a pony tail, and petite. She was wearing a blue shirt and khaki shorts. The little girl had a similar colored shirt and shorts. The little boy was wearing an all-brown outfit with a spider on it (I made a remark to him joking about him having a tarantula on his back) and a hat (kind of like a cowboy hat).
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21 comments:
Lets hope this nanny, wakes up and see how terrible watching other peoples children can be. If she is young lets hope she is planning to go to college, and get a real job.
Maybe this child is autistic or ADHD and has problems controlling himself. I know an autistic/ADHD child that behaves in the same manner. If this is the case, the child should have a nanny that specializes in special needs children, it does not sound like this nanny does herself. In any case, the child needs to learn better behavior, regardless of any special needs he may have.
Oh my gosh, this cracks me up. I know who you are talking about and I should start out by saying that this is the most qualified nanny and experienced nanny I know. She is wonderful with children and has watched my own charges on occasion. That being said, you do not know the spawn she has been taking care of, when she started that job, he was nothing like that, but has been diagnosed with bipolar since and lets just say that the boy needs some major help. His parents do nothing to help or discipline him and they do not support her position as his nanny what so ever. This is the same boy who has attacked her on repeated occasion and even threatened her with a knife while the parents do nothing to help the situation. she has tried her hardest to be a good nanny but thank God she is done! in fact, if i remember correctly this is her last week with this little boy because she can't take it any more. yes the child does need someone who is trained to deal with psychotic children, but the care must start at home. I wish this nanny luck, girl, when you read this blog you will laugh your head off, then forward this to the mom asap and let her realize that her actions are being seen by others in public.
nnj: I'm sorry, but I'm a nanny and you can make a pretty successful career out of it, and to find a good family, you do have to go to college usually (atleast thats a requirement of some agencies) and be atleast 21. I'm not either of those, but I plan to be a career nanny and just because nannying seems like a easy job, it requires a lot. Nannies are different from babysitters and "get a real job" sounds to me like you're ignorant about what some nannies actually do.
nnj
how rude! we finally have a good nanny sighting and you want to turn it into something negative and degrade her?
nnj,
If your feelings toward nannies are so derogatory, why do you feel the need to peruse a website for nannies and sightings of nannies? You either a) have children who are cared for by a nanny whom you dislike and/or distrust, which makes you a horrible parent, or b) you have no life. I'm hoping it's B.
we should start a separate area called "i saw your monsters" to warn potential nannies of children like these. yuck!
I feel for this poor girl. These kids are the kind that make me want to never have my own.
One thing makes me curious however. OP, are you sure this wasn't a really young step mom? The only reason I ask this is because you said that, "He kept hitting her and making horrible remarks about her and his father", which leads me to think that the nanny/girl might be involved.
kelsey, ha ha, she is definitly not the boys step mother. Although the dad is definitly hot, and has her friend we'd all love to do him, that is not the case. This young boy has an extreme anger management issue and hates everybody in his life. so while the nanny and those of us who are her friends dream about breaking the nanny/dad relationship, alas, he's already taken
I, too, know this nanny - and for your information nnj, not only has she gone to college, she actually has a master's.
This family (actually the mother - the parents are divorced and the father is a pretty good guy, from what the nanny says; and no, they are absolutely not even remotely involved) is the biggest nightmare - rarely paying her on time, NEVER paying her overtime (and she's worked a TON of overtime), and she finally had to move out (she was a live-in) because the mother would get really angry if she refused to work on the weekends and after hours (it was in her contract that she didn't have to work those hours).
And that's only the tip of the iceberg. The mother is shamefully neglectful of the boy (the asian girl is the nanny's former charge), and I'm quite sure that's where his behavior problems stem from (and they are many and deep - as nanny b wrote, he has tried to stab her multiple times and threatened to kill her).
The mother refuses to discipline him, and buys him a new toy nearly every day. This boy is 7 or 8 and he has a brand new Mac laptop. He has 2 rooms and a basement overflowing with toys. He is never punished for anything, even when he's violent towards the nanny right in front of the mother: in fact, on one occasion, when the boy tried to stab the nanny in the eye with a pen, the mother snapped at them to stop picking at each other, or something to that effect. And then she has the gall to tell a family this nanny is interviewing with that the nanny doesn't know how to discipline!
Thankfully, today was her last day. She stayed with that family for a YEAR. That's certainly more fortitude than I have.
How frightening that this boys behavior would be so remarkable, that we would have more than one person knowing, and feeling sorry for, the same nanny!
Sounds like this kid needs some serious psychological help.
Why would anyone with a Masters Degree, stay in a job like this? I would think a nanny with a formal education would be snatched in a heartbeat. Even with a degree she is/or was an idiot to stay in a position where she was getting abused.
Maybe, she has self-esteem issues???
Or maybe she really loves children and feels for this boy and worries about his future. Sounds like he has real psychological issues that are not being addressed. I used a temporary nanny for a few weeks awhile ago who was finishing her Masters in child psychology. She is wonderful, kind, sweet and absolutely loves children. We stayed in touch and she stops by to say hi often to me and the kids (she lives only a few blocks away). She was an enormous help and support when my son was undergoing evaluations for early intervention for developmental delays. She has a part-time babysitting position she still keeps doing even though she no longer does private childcare because she is so worried about the little boy. When I asked her why she keeps the job because he is so difficult and not particularly nice to her (and his parents are also a real piece of work BTW), she said she feels an obligation towards him since she knows she is the only possiblity of him getting ANY help and if it takes being his babysitter to offer him that help, so be it. I take offense at the first comment. The vast majority of nannies out there are wonderful caring people who see childcare as their calling--they are no less a professional than I am. And there job is far more important than mine.
sorry, their (been a long day and I need some sleep).
No longer anonymous regular:
Thank you for your support of good nannies. Remarks like nnj's are so hurtful.
Manhattan, I agree. It's really a bit shocking to see, firsthand, how people you don't even know automatically look down on you because of your choice of profession...
Well, nnj, this nanny - with her formal education - would CERTAINLY be snatched up in a heartbeat by another family, however, she wants to stay in the same area and that makes things a LOT harder. Even with the limited market in this area, she really doesn't have a big problem finding nanny positions - the problem is that she'd like to get out of nannying and into the field her master's is in. Unfortunately, the market in her field is, like many, not good right now.
She stayed with that position for a year because 1) the hours allowed her to go to school, and 2) she didn't want to commit to another family only to quit abruptly if she found a job in her field. I think that's pretty admirable.
Maybe, in the future, you might refrain from calling someone an "idiot" and speculating about self-esteem without knowing anything about her.
That poor nanny! I blame the parents...they are teaching him that it is OK to treat people like that. I would last one day with that boy - I don't care how badly I needed a job!
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