Monday

"I Was Told There Would be a Kitchenette"

I have been a live-in for over a year with this family. They asked me if I could commit to two more years. I said yes. They said they wanted to do some renovations with me in mind. This thrilled me! For the past year, I have lived in a room off of the laundry room with a full bath. I was excited to see that there renovations would mean building a new separate garage and converting the old two car garage into a nanny room.

The area I was in would be included in their kitchen addition so I needed to move out. I suggested that I could move to the guest room but was shot down. At first I was hurt. Then my boss said, you wouldn't want to be there, what privacy would you have? This made sense.
So, not like this.

My boss started asking me questions like, would I like a full or queen bed. Would I want a desk and desk chair? An electrician came out and did some work on the house including the garage. The garage was totally cleaned out and sheet rocked and painted with a base/primer.

Sounds good, right?

The concrete was painted. A rug from Home depot was thrown down. A new bed that costs like $89. and a new queen mattress and bedding. All of the stuff from my old room, including the twin bed and nightstand and two dressers. And, FROM THE SIDE OF THE ROAD, a sofa. and FROM THE SIDE OF THE ROAD, a small kitchen table set.

This was revealed to me on last Monday after I had went away  for the weekend. Not too mention, all of my stuff had been moved and carted out. The garage door is still there. They have heavy clear curtain sealing it off. Over that, then they hung white sheets, admittedly, they tried to make it look nice, using an old chandelier to make it hang a certain way over the sofa. There are two windows that face the same way and on one wall only.
 I have to leave the garage to go in the house to the second floor to shower. There is a half bath in the basement I can use other times, but neither is convenient. Taking a shower last Sunday was not a good thing in a house that was bustling with family on a rainy day.

It's hot in here. I complained and they got me one fan. Then a second fan. When my boss realized I was not loving my concrete garage house, she did go ahead and buy a portable AC, but WTF?

This has totally shot my self esteem. I feel like they made the same provisions for me that they do for their dogs. Am I over reacting? At some point, yes, they plan to finish the garage into an actual room, but they are doing their other garage and kitchen renovation now.

I asked the foreman when they were going to do the garage. He said "There isn't much to do really, rebuild the garage wall and put in a window and door, probably before Halloween"

What??

14 comments:

Sara said...

Where were you showering before? Is this "room" only three sided? Is there no way to shut your doors at night for privacy?

I hate live in work ib general but if you're in a room devided by a curtain from the rest of the house, you're better off getting your own studio apt somewhere else.

Anonymous said...

It sounds like they made it very nice for you. What more do you want? Once they take down the garage door and put up a new wall, it will be a nice little studio of your own. And they got you AC - sounds really nice, not everyone has AC.

So, you have to shower in the main house and the bathroom is a little further away now. Other than that, you have privacy and your own space.

I am not understanding why you are complaining.

Maryanne said...

This is why people don't do nice things for people. The family re-did your room and you complain. No good deed goes unpunished.

Anonymous said...

Well, if that can make you feel better, the room provided by my last live-in family was as small as the one in the movie Harry Potter when he sleeps at the Dursleys.

Yep that was an absolute shit hole of a bedroom, while they had a guest room that was perfect for a nanny to be in but nope, to the parents,I was clearly not worthy of the nice guest room so she put me in a horrendous one instead that technically was too small to even be called a bedroom.I stayed a month and It was my last live-in position ;)

You live there so if your living conditions does not match your standards , it will be time for you to move on to another family that will offer you a better quality of accomodation.

Keep updated ;) !

Ben Affleck's Nanny is Living the Life said...

I would burn that shit down!

Anonymous said...

Clearly you need to job search immediately. This is ridiculous. I wouldn't put my pets in the garage. The bath situation alone is unacceptable. They might as well put her in a lean-to in the backyard. Tell them you will be babysitting and you need a letter of reference. Then when you are babysitting, interview and job search. Get going missy. You deserve so much better than this.

RBTC said...

the idea that you will stay 2 years somewhere you hate is not good for you. i have lived in similar situations and not been bothered by it as long as i was making money - but you need to leave the situation and the advice of getting a good reference is key - keep us updated

OTNanny said...

To the people who are saying the OP is ungrateful, it should not be acceptable to give your nanny furnishings that you found on the street!! That's what broke college kids do, not what people who can presumably afford a live-in to care for their children need to do. I'm not saying she needs top of the line stuff, but giving her a couch picked up off the side of the road is unhygienic. If they don't value her enough to at least give her a couch that they know isn't infested with bedbugs, she has a right to feel at least a little bit insulted.

RBTC said...

i agree the unhygienic furniture is a very serious lack of judgement - the situation does not look good

Julie said...

I completely agree OTNanny! I have no problem with things being second-hand. For me, the issue with the couch and stuff from the side of the road is that it it could have all sorts of bugs and nasty things in it. Was is professionally cleaned? if so that MIGHT change things.

For me the BIG problem is that they went through/moved all of her things when they knew she would be gone. SHE should have moved her own things. I would not ever want my employer or landlord going through my things, packing my things, or moving my things. it would feel like a HUGE invasion of my privacy. That alone is something that would NEED to be discussed if I was in her position.


If you OP, were promised a kitchenette, talk to them about it. If you have a problem with road furniture, talk about it. If you have a problem with having no private bathroom, (I absolutely would have an issue with having to trek through the entire house and through common areas to use a shared shower...) talk to them about it.
Did they agree to a private bathroom when you were hired? if so, discuss that. Do you kind of get the idea here?

But what I really want to tell you to do is to grow up.
If in the year you have been there, you haven't figured out if you think you are getting shafted, or if you are working for kind people that may have not thought about the situation from your view point, then you, sweet-cheeks, are a problem all on your own. If you are an adult that can't tell her boss that you are not comfortable in the concrete box, then you are just as much to blame for being in the box as the person who put you there. Why? because you didn't stand up and say no.



Jess said...

I agree with both sides oddly enough. Street furniture is gross! Even as a college student, I wouldn't have used a couch or bedding (or anything that couldn't be saturated in cleaning products) off the street! The fact that this family is too cheap to get you sanitary furniture is a huge red flag to me. I don't work for cheap people!

As to the space itself, does it have four walls? Did you have a bathroom previously? Are they planning on installing walls and a bathroom soon? All of these answers would impact my reply.

As to you, I think you're either very young or a little immature. A year is more than enough time to suss out your NF. If they're nice, accommodating, opportunistic etc... All of that could have been gleaned within the first few months. Reconsider the field if you still don't know. Or possibly reconsider living in.

Lacy said...

I would have a frank conversation with them ASAP. I would also look for a new place/job ASAP.

The fact you entered the job with a full bathroom as part of your compensation package, but have now been given a new room without that feature or a change in pay rate-- is wrong.

The part about of the "4" walls only 3 are real, is not considered a room, safe, healthy, or livable. That only one wall has a window, leaves no room for you to catch a draft.

The fact that this room is so hot, its unlivable-- did your old room have temperature control, real instillation, other modern cooling/heating features? Again you accepted the job with a room that could maintain a livable temperature.

It doesn't matter when or if the family will install the kitchen, full bath, cooling, a wall, more windows. What matters is that they provide you with a livable, comfortable, comparable situation NOW in the mean time.

Do you have a work contract, does your contract state you living conditions- if so I think that would withhold up in court. They would never do this to their children, doing to the nanny just shows they think you are JUST hired help-- nothing more.

Anonymous said...

Yes , it was disrespectful.

It's easy to see if a family values you.

Check out your room, if everything is second hands , with the bare minimum while the guest room not taken by ANYONE most of the time is glowing , amazing to be in with nice bedding and stuff in general while the family absolutely refuses you to sleep in the nice room. You then have a pretty clear idea on about the level of priority between you living there most over the occasional guest.

Look for another job, make sure you have a signed reference from them before though to ensure that if they suddenly switch and get nasty, you'll have a proof that you did a good job.

Anonymous said...

I don't know, it doesn't seem disrespectful. They gave you a bigger room, put furniture and chandelier. Why would they buy brand new furniture if they can't afford it or it isn't necessary? They bought you a new mattress, every time you complained about the heart they got you 2 fans and a new AC. Move to NY and try living in one of the tiny apartment rooms with shared bathrooms, then you will know how good you have it there. It seems like you expect a 5-star facility in someone else's home. You sound very demanding. Why should they put you up in the guest room? It is for their guests and not meant to be lived-in.