Saturday

cl-wtf-1-1-2
1) Free rent for a trade - (WA) Childcare... yes, a trade. Please read "ALL" of this to understand what I'm offering. This might sound odd but I'm running out of time and options. I need a live-in "female" for the new school year. I'm a single father and my mother has been the one helping me with my son. She's going to visit realitives for 3 monthes starting the 5th of September. I need someone I can count on to get my child to and from school. I'm willing to supply rent free lodging and pay utilities in order for someone to help me out with this dilemma, though you will need to buy your own food and personal hygenic items. I have 2 roomies who are more friends then roomies and I don't expect them to watch over my son since we all have our own lives. Dick Scobee School is just down the street and you'll have most of the day, nights and weekends to do what ever you want, part time job, school or just slack off... not my business. Although I will need to be able to get a hold of you if an emergency comes up, in most cases I'd be handling that myself anyway. Since rent is free I'd like it if you could help with the occasionalhousehold duties and other misc tasks. Don't worry it's not like there's much to take care of, you'll probably be bored most of the time, sorry.
***A bit about my family: I'm 35 and work fulltime 8am-5pm or later. I'm home 90% of the time that I'm not at work. My son is 8 and very well behaived. He's going into 3rd grade this year. I do stay up until midnight and he goes to bed at 8-8:30 on school nights. We've lived in this house for 5 years. There's 3 cats 2 in house 1 out. So please no pets if you have one.
***A bit about the house: It's a 2 bedroom house and 4 people live here. One roomie lives in the garage and the other in a motorhome on the far side of the garage, I hardly ever see them and the 2 of them at the same time is even more rare. you'd probable see my female roomie in the mornings before work and the male in the nights or afternoon time (they are 34 and 39). My son and I occupy the 2 rooms in the house. There is a pool with a deck and a playset for kids. I have no cable but I do have a 60" tv and netflix with BR player that you can use.
***What I'd expect from you: (this will make or break the deal) Lets get this one out of the way. Sadly my house isn't very big and you'd be sleeping in my room. And "NO" you don't have to sleep in my bed with me but you can't be sleeping on the couch either. Accomidations can be made within reason. I'm not looking for a girlfriend, I simply need help. If you have a child that will be attending Dick Scobee, that might work out too. As I said earlier, you need to provide your own food, I have an outside freezer if that'll help. I have a small house so you can't bring too much stuff. Sorry again for that, I suggest a storage unit if you plan on moving out of an appartment or someplace you furnished. I simply don't have the room. Transportation and entertainment is on you. I know what I'm asking is a bit out there but I need to try. I do ask that you send some reason this would apply to you and a bit about your background if you decide to persue this. If it sounds like we'd be able to work something out I'll get back to you and we can move forward from there. We'll meet face-to-face and have a good talk where we can both play QandA. We can meet in a public place of course, I want you to feel comfortable. This is most likely a tempory position so don't get any ideas on free living forever. I will answer any questions you have for me, so feel free to ask. Thanks for your time.
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Submitted by Reinette. Thank you!

2) Nanny/Teacher Needed - (Las Vegas) Hi I am interviewing for this exciting and fun position here at my home. It entails some light duties, childcare of one or more children, my daughter being the primary child, as well as her friends for whom I already give childcare. The hours are flexible, and include some nights, as I currently work a second job away from the home. Please come by for an interview, the pay is excellent, and my home is clean and spacious. Need a person or person(s) to start immediately! Thanks.

RE: Nanny/Teacher Needed - (Las Vegas) BEWARE! Just a heads up, the pay is not great. I’m sorry… Last time I checked, $35 isn’t great for just one child. It works for a daycare, but not a one child thing. Especially for a child who is a straight up brat and has no respect or discipline. And as far as watching other peoples kids on occasion, she will give you NO NOTICE prior to getting there. On top of that, she will expect you to still just get the $35 for her child and her keep whatever money she gets for watching the other children from their parents. The title for this job is totally misleading, too. She needs someone to come into her home, take her to work (she's a stripper, no joke) go back to her house and stay up with the child because who knows when she actually goes to sleep and sometimes she won’t, and then when mom is done on the pole, go back and pick her up. With NO contribution for gas. Great pay my ass. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not knocking the strippers out there, but please.. Be open and honest about yourself. And her house is nowhere near clean. Its actually a huge mess. And because of her philosophy on life, she doesn’t even make her daughter help clean up. The daughter will expect to walk all over you and if you try to put her in line, she will lie to her mother about it and make it seem like you did something wrong. Any more questions about this woman, email me. I have PLENTY more to say about this woman. PS… The woman is ABSOLUTELY crazy!
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Submitted by Anonymous. Thank you!

3) Nanny needed in our home - (WI) Hi, I’m Jaclyn. I’m a single mom of an almost 2 yr. old boy. We live in Watertown w/my parents. I expect you to provide snacks +meals +definately keep my son on his normal schedual for naps [one nap between 10:30am-1pm]. Please don’t let my son nap over 2 hours, thanks. I expect you to do some light household cleaning duties. I also expect you to have reliable transportation WHICH INCLUDES clean + safe driving AND public records. I would also expect you to actually interact + play with my son, not have him watch tv so much.Some t.v. shows [i.e. Sesame Street, Dora the Explorer, Go Diego Go! or any PBS/educational shows] are okay; tv time – ONLY 1 hr./day. He loves to help in general, especially with cleaning. He also loves playing with cars, trucks, blocks, trains + he loves dancing to music. He isn’t potty trained yet, but we’re slowly starting – getting him use to what the potty does/is made for, try having him sit down a few times each day, etc. He also has no allergies that we know of that you’ll need to be concerned about. I am negotiable about costs, but they have to be reasonable +understandable. I am on a tight budget so I can pay up to $10/day. I will be working Mon-Fri 8am-4pm +sometimes overtime [Sat + Sun - same hours]. I would let you know ahead of time if I need care on the weekends too. For sure I would need care for the weekdays at those times. My parents work from 8am-5pm + they don’t get home till around between 5:10-6pm. I would prefer someone who’s honest, caring, loyal, etc. I would also prefer someone who has an Early Childcare Education background or someone who has many experiences with children. Anyone who knows CPR well or is CPR certified, along with/or they’ve worked in a daycare setting would be great too.**Please NOT anyone who has a bad record of any sort – NO dui’s, NO many traffic violations, NO drug-related arrests, NO burglaries/theft, +definately NOT domestic abuse, etc.
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Submitted by Anonymous. Thank you!

4) Full-time childcare needed - (CO) Nanny needed M-F, 7am-5pm. 2 children, OUR HOME ONLY! Childcare duties: direct children in daily activities, direct children to clean up after self and perform daily education and chore duties (Schedule provided) (We encourage you to have them clean up their own messes) it teaches them responsibility. Prepare breakfast and lunch (easy items laid out each day) You should at least know how to cook an egg, boil water, use microwave. Basic. Take children to occasional activities (we pay for any cost associated with activities, example: movies, craft classes, trips to mall or Dairy Queen). We are not paying someone to sit on our couch, watch television, and text their friends all day. We do however have satalite television for those rainy or scortching days when it is best to stay indoors. Household duties: laundry, vacuum/sweep, general straightening, bathrooms, kitchen. Must have valid drivers license. Must be willing to submit to background check. Great job for senior citizen - would love to have a Grandma type apply. Grandmas rule! $100 cash per week.
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Submitted by Anonymous. Thank you!

5) Room w/bath for Nanny/Free Rent! - (Las Vegas) Mom of 7 year old is offering a room with bathroom in my large spacious home. Centennial hills area north 95 and 215 west. House privilages and room free for exchange of care and help with child. I need help with cooking, school work, shower time, etc., and driving to and from activities. This is on a daily basis. No set schedule yet. Looking for mature lady who loves kids and is and will be flexible. We have a nice comfortable home in a gated area with large park nearby. Looking for long term nanny for the right person. Non smoking person. No pets. MATURE FEMALE.
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Submitted by slb3334. Thank you!

25 comments:

♥ Amy Darling ♥ said...

Okay...number one is just plain creepy. He said you have to sleep in HIS room and sleeping on the couch is not an option. WTF??! It's so obvious the new nanny will have to sleep in his bed. Duh!! This is just plain gross + creepy. I hope no woman out there responds to this ad, this guy is just a recipe for disaster.

I didn't see anything wrong with the last one...perhaps it was waay over my head?

The rest are just plain cheap.

$10/day?
I can make that collecting cans/bottles at the park.

Sheesh.

just sayin' said...

All of these are horrible! Especially the first one, creepy is right! The last one, not as much, but still. It sounds like mom wants a very flexible nanny (hint: I have no set hours for you and will work you to death!) plus you get to cook, clean and drive my kid all over town - to live in this fabulous gated community for FREE!

Not.

ConfusedMissDee said...

1. I live in the garage. Another person in a motorhome. A 2 bedroom home. Father and son. Sharing room with the father, an employed man who works a FT job, with the couch not being an option.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!

He can't send his son to a childcare center, who would provide transportation to and from school?

2. I wonder if anyone know she's a stripper? She must be coked out if she thinks she can pay someone to watch her child for such little pay. I remember working for my best friend's aunt, and there was a dancer who worked at the center. The teacher was a flake who did nothing in terms of the children and one of the other teachers made a comment to her about sticking with dancing and being a hoe, because that's all she (the teacher knew).

Must be some powerful crap she is snorting....

3. I charge a minimum of $80-100 per day for care....

4. See number 3

Thanks MPP! What a great way to start my day with a laugh....

MissMannah said...

Oh my god, I have no words for #1. This might be one of the most "WTF!" posts we've had here.

gypsy said...

These posts are like a train wreck. Nothing good comes out of looking, but you can't look away!

I_want_cake! said...

BEST CL-WTF EVER! Its my most favorite feature MPP thanks!!

Lyn said...

I haven't even made it past number 1 yet. . . Ho-lee-cow. . . "

Now, I'm not saying you HAVE to sleep in my bed with me (btw, I like to be the 'big spoon'), but you can't sleep anywhere else, soooooo...."

lol said...

I picture #1 as being a bar regular who can't even get an obese drunk floozy to bed him.

Any takers? said...

Number one is gross. He wants someone to sleep in his bed. And don't expect to live free forever. What a gem. Can't imagine how is is still single?

Aye... said...

I really want to respond to #1 just to get him to write some more. Unfortunately I can't come up with anything to say...

Lyn said...

DO IT!!!!!! Sound super professional and awesome and then say that you have a medical condition that causes you to sleep in nothing but your underwear. Is this a problem?

utnanny said...

#1 - Ewww Ewww Ewww Ewww Ewww Ewww
#2 - No way am i watching your friends kids without additional pay
#3 - wow i think she should win an award for one of the lowest paying job in cl wtf. 1.25 and hour
#4 - oh boy you get to be a housekeeper, laundress, chauffeur, and nanny all for just over 2 dollars an hour.
#5 - no set schedule and no pay listed. red flags but not to awful.

RBTC said...

i wonder if anyone ever takes these jobs...

♥ Amy Darling ♥ said...

@RBTC:
Me too.

I would love to know myself.

Too bad there is no way for us to find out.

Not there anymore... said...

#1 has been removed by its author!!

Aria said...

He removed it, huh? Well I guess he must have found a taker! :D

RBTC said...

or the vice squad got him, hopefully

curious said...

Why vice? He can advertise for a roomie/slut/nanny if he wants! lol

RBTC said...

@curious: It's my understanding that you cannot advertise prostitution on craigslist, but i have so little to do with it i am not informed fully, you see articles that sometimes there are crack downs? what do you think?

@amy - it's just so weird that there are so many of these submissions that are slave labor and weirdness - and the posters are happy as a clam, totally confident.

maybe we can figure out a way to hear from some of these people and find out

just saying said...

RBTC that obviously is not a prostitution ad. There is no mention of money in exchange for sex. Sometimes I think you say inflamatory things for attention. I guess it worked bc I usually ignore your posts.

RBTC said...

@just saying - have a nice day - and please keep ignoring me ! **sigh**

Luc said...

Did it never occur to this father that his son could sleep in his room?

Maybe not the idea situation but FAR less creepy than a stranger...

Caring Mom All Day said...

Weird ads.

Brat said...

Sadly the 10 a day job sounds good to me at the moment. I nanny but i moved home to care for my mom for little pay as my dad and brother also think that I should care for them too. I get 200 a month which for my mom isn't bad but 100 of it's for ironing my brothers work uniforms. Which wouldn't be bad if someone else washed them. That alone takes the 200, when my mom was able to do those things I'm sure they weren't as nasty. My mom loved to do laundry washing and ironing then she got sick and he'd wear them wrinkled if possible.

caring mom all day said...

I understand "Brat" we all go through tough times . I hope things improve for you soon. :)