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OPINION
Would you invite your MB and DB to your wedding?

26 comments:

The Noble Nanny said...

I've worked nearly a decade in the childcare field and I can honestly say there is only one (out of several) families that I would let become that personal.

Phoenix said...

If I was a MB and my nanny was getting married I would not want to go but I would like to be invited. My friends joke around with my because they know that I don't wamt to go out with them but i want to be invited. But that is my own personal glitch.

i think it depends on how close you are to the family. I was in my nanny's wedding. i was a flower girl. So it depends on how much you are involved with one another. Has it been extremely professional? or has the MB or DB crossed over into family/friend territor?

MissMannah said...

Absolutely yes, if I was having a big wedding. Mine was a courthouse one with just family so I didn't have to worry about the guest list. It is common courtesy to invite your bosses and if they want to keep the professional distance and not come, it is their prerogative. Besides, if you send them an invitation, they will probably give you a gift!

Village said...

I think it depends on the size of the wedding. Is everyone and their cousin invited, or is it close family and friends? Does the groom know the employers? It's a personal decision IMHO. There is no right or wrong.

SLNanny said...

I got married just a month after starting my current job. So I did not invite them. But if I were getting married now, my husband would be upset, but I would invite them. I have been with this family for 4 years though.

♥ Amy Darling ♥ said...

I love certain bosses of mine, however I would only invite close personal friends and family to see my nuptials.

But if I were EXTREMELY close to my bosses, I don't see why not.

la said...

I'm like Phoenix. I feel offended if I don't get invited to things, but probably wouldn't go even if I was. I would invite my bosses to my wedding.

SLNanny said...

I did invite my previous MB and charges to my wedding. She and I became close friends after I worked for her. Her boys, now teens, were my ushers.

Rule of Thumb said...

I'd say that a good guideline for this might be that if your fiancé's boss is invited, go ahead and invite your MB/DB too.

Bethany said...

I'd invite my current Mb& DB and one of my precious ones if I were planning a wedding.

It's totally up to you.

If you invite be prepared for them to show up. In other words if you can't afford the extra plates and are doing it to be nice, but hoping they don't show up don't do it.

Congrats!

The answer is yes! said...

My charges would be my flower girl and ring boy of course!!! They are such a big part of my life I couldnt imagine it any other way!

NannyTuTu said...

Definitely! I'm very close to my MB and DB- honestly, they'd make the guest list before most relatives. And I'd ask my charges to be the flower girls and ring bearer without a doubt!

Rocky Mountain Nanny said...

If I were to ever get married, I can think of about 10 couples/singles I would invite whom I have worked for as a nanny. I also imagine I would have a ton of flower girls, bridesmaids and ring bearers. I could not imagine getting married without including a bunch of my ex charges and their families.

Nanny Pants said...

I personally would because that is the type of relationship I have with them... but just go with your gut! :)

Michelle said...

I am getting married in August and MB/DB are on the guest list as well as a former MB/DB. I think it depends on the relationship you have with them. I love my current ones and see them in Mu life even when I no linger work for them. My former ones I love and talk to a few times a month and visit every time I return home.

Penny said...

I got married when my charge was just a over a year so I was with them for 10 months by the time my wedding rolled around. I invited my current family for a few reasons 1.) It's good etiquette 2.) I felt since it's such a tight work space environment and I felt it would help them (at the time they were very nervous first time parents at the time,) get to know me and my family to better bridge the gap to get familiar. 3.) I wanted to:) I also invited the family I previously worked for because I was really close with them and really wanted them there other than that I invited only two, my current family and my previous. My other families I was not that close so it was a non issue. I truly feel that out of courtesy you should consider it. I hope that helps! Enjoy your wedding and have fun!

justthenanny said...

I invited the family I nannied for at the time for (5 years ago) to my wedding! The MB and I had been talking a lot about my wedding during the planning process, so I was happy to invite them. :)

melissa said...

I invited two of my previous families to my wedding (one of which I was working for at the time). I've been extremely lucky to work for awesome families that I get along with though. Both of the little girls (one from each family) were two of my flower girls. I really think it's a comfort thing though. I guess if you've been with a family for at least a year, maybe extending them invite would just be the polite thing to do (unless you're having a small, or private ceremony).

A nanny who cares said...

The only reason I allowed kids at my wedding was so that my charges could come! I couldn't imagine getting married without them there. But, we are very close and I've been with them for almost 3 years. I got married 3 months ago now and my charges still talk about it a lot. I also invited the family that I work for once a week because the moms are friends and the little girl asked me, in front of her mom, if she was going to be invited to my wedding. I felt it would make our situation awkward not to invite them.

Phoenix said...

i don't know if i'm reading this right.

a nanny who cares "The only reason I allowed kids at my wedding was so that my charges could come!"

So you weren't going to be inviting the family kids at all if the charges didn't come? I've seen people do this with funerals (not inviting kids) but weddings. That is odd.

N is for Nanny said...

It would totally depend on my relationship with the family and if I think their presence would make the day better for me - particularly if I was struggling with having too many guests for my venue and/or budget. I would not invite my current family, nor do I think that they would want to come. Having heard them talk about weddings they've attended and their opinions on them, I know they would not enjoy mine, in part due to religious and cultural differences between us. We also have a relationship where we keep our non-work lives private - e.g., they don't know my boyfriend's name. I would, however, probably invite two of my past families - one recent and the other long past. If I was having a very large wedding, there is a third past family with whom I am also close and would invite.

I like the idea of using if one's partner's boss is being invited.

A nanny who cares said...

Phoenix: Yes, you read that right. I don't have any family members that are children. Most people where I'm from do "kid-free" receptions. Logic being that it's late, people are drinking and it usually isn't an atmosphere that children should be in. I had two bridesmaids who had children as well so I felt I couldn't really tell them they couldn't come. But the main reason for me was that I love my charges and am so close with them I consider them family.

Tc said...

Im so glad this was posted because I wondered the same thing only my mb actually told me at one of the kids bday parties that her kids would be in my wedding! Luckily for me after the initial shock of that convo wore off I realized that her kids would be perfect and the only young kids me and my fiancé know so they will be in it.

I have a question though. My mb and db are divorcing, should I invite both parents separately or together? They are friends and get along great but they are also both dating other people.

Susannah said...

@TC I think you're MB is extremely rude assuming her children would be in her wedding.


I would invite them seperately.

Rosegirl said...

Phoenix, a lot of people have a 'no kids' rule for their wedding. Interesting that you said that about funerals, because I've never heard of a 'no kids' funeral! Must be differences in where we're from.

MissMannah said...

I've never heard of a no kids funeral and only heard of a no kids wedding once. And just about everyone agreed it was in extremely poor taste for the bride to specify that.