Hi. I don't know where to begin, I am not much of a blogger, but have enjoyed reading stories here on ISYN. I have a very sticky situation and am highly upset and just need to vent, advice would be great.
I was recently let go from an amazing nanny job I had. I had this job for almost 8 months and am so upset, I can barely eat anything and I have been just trying to recollect myself. Im staying with my sister and her husband, and my niece. So, right now finance is not a problem. I have a spare room with bathroom, for myself. So, for now just supported by family and when I'm ready, I will begin to job hunt, sister has lots of friends with kids. I was basically caught off guard and terminated out of no where, what hurts the most is feeling betrayed.
I interviewed for a SAHM, who also had a side business and did a lot of charity events, focused on animal charity and stuff. They have a wonderful little girl, who was shy of being one when I interviewed. Basically she was a good MB. Great, actually. She overpaid since I was only working for her 4 days a week, 7 hour days-to complete 40 hours pay. On top of that she gave me a gas card weekly, as it was a 15-20 minute commute from my place. So, basically I did not spend gas money, because she gave me gas allowance. I had free roam of their house, she was not home when I was there--obviously why I nannied. They had a pool I could use and go free on foods I wanted. And, she encouraged outings for the little one and I would get gas reimbrusement for the milage. I didn't have to worry about paying out of pocket for anything really. MB even stated if we stayed in good terms, and some unforseen reason hours had to be cut, she would help find a job for me and severence pay of 2 months, with good references!
What I did NOT know was that, as kind as she was and laid back... was that I was on camera! They also had mini microphones hidden, so it on when I was there and she wasn't. I had no idea, she never asked my opinion on nanny cams or anything! Basically, I thought I had a dream job. I loved the LO. I said something stupid....and I know I shouldn't have. The DB was never ever home!!! Went months before meeting him, though I did occasionally pick up the phone when he called, as I was allowed to take messages. I had seen pics of him, and to be honest, with the way she talked about him and what he seemed to provide, I thought he must be an amazing man. I had no plans of doing anything, even if I met him...which I eventually did. Basically, he came home unexpectantly while MB was away and, I just felt mezmerized by him. I felt like I knew him, and we clicked. I saw him again, when they had date night and was asked to sit for them. He and I chatted like old friends, while she got ready. I had NO idea I was being filmed and developed a crush on DB. A girlfriend called and without realizing it, I mentioned how fond I was of him and how lucky she was. Thing is, I also mentioned, I would not mind having him and since MB had told me the same day that DB would be working from home 2 days a week for the next few months for a project. I told my friends, I could not wait to get to know him better, was more curious then meaning any harm. BUT of course it came off like I was ready to make a move, but I know better! It was just girl talk!
The next week, MB started acting kind of uneasy, at first I thought she was having a bad day, but as the week flew I knew it was something more serious and probably something I did or said regarding my charge, and by that evening before my shift was over for the week, she said we needed to talk. She basically stated that I was a wonderful caregiver and that it was amazing to see how well my charge and I had bonded and she knew my charge was in good hands. Then she stated, "I also now know, that I am not too comfortable with the whole idea of having someone nanny in my home when my husband is home, that I feel could be more interested in him then in the job"...and then she explained how for her own sanity and peace of mind a camera, and microphone were on when I was there, and she had planned on removing the camera and microphone but neglected to as she forgot. Once she remembered and was fine with not having footage about our day, she started packing things up and then stumbled upon a recording, and in that recording she heard the phone conversation. I guess she back tracked to videos of days where DB was home, which was rare-- as he popped in unexptectantly 5 times since I was hired on, and noticed how intent our conversation was and I guess became upset about leaving me alone with him. She said "It's not my husband, but more of you, I do not approve of homewrecking, and if I can control who comes to my house, to stop it, I will. I've seen innocent things evovle and I know it can go sinister, and the kids do not deserve this nor the innocent spouse!" She then stated, maybe it wasn't like it seemed but for peace of mind, she would prefer an older caretaker until her duties were finished and told me, she would compensate for the months pay that I was owed but nothing more and stated, she was did not feel right being a reference.
I am highly upset, while I admit, it was dumb what I said, if I knew I was being recorded, I would have NOT said that, I would be more professional....so upset, and it's hard to put myself together, but am trying. Was what I did a firing offense?... I do not see it this way..... and is there anything I can do about this ?...
at 3:47 AM