03 May, 2012
Should Uncouth Parents be Told the Truth?
I just discovered this site and it is perfect timing as I need to make a decision and need help. I work for a family who is so disrespectful and unappreciative of me, but I'm having a hard time making the decision to leave. I started with the family in Aug 2011. There is one kid (C) who has special needs. The family and I do have a Nanny Agreement but they have not stuck to it.
Problems started early on. In the beginning I would tidy up the house, although it was not in my job duties to do anything other than things pertaining to the child. As time went past I'd come in to a kitchen full of old food, soiled milk in sippy cups, sink full of dirty dishes, and even dishes scattered around the house. I'd clean up because it drove me crazy, but now it's expected of me. I am the Nanny, not a maid. I drive the child to and from school, activities, play dates and therapies and do not get reimbursed for gas. I also run errands for the family. They said before I was hired I would be reimbursed, but have yet to see any gas money.
DB tends to stay home quite often, for leisure things like golfing, the gym, or errands, but I still arrive at 7:30 and stay until 7. He plays barely any part in his child's life and when he is home all day barely says a word to her. The nannies stay all day and night until she is asleep, even if DB is just sitting around in his pajamas. As per our agreement I was to give a weeks notice for personal days, and call by 6 am for sick days. The ONE and only time I called in sick, I called at 5:30 but was told I still had to come in because there was no back up. I gave 6 weeks notice that I needed surgery, but was told it wasn't realistic for their needs, so I had to postpone it until they found coverage. Myself nor the other two nannies (3 of us: me full time and two part time night nannies) are never given a heads up for anything: dad traveling, relatives coming etc. there's been multiple times where they "forgot" to get money to pay us, and we had to wait.
MB is very rude and insulting and doesn't say a word about her child being well taken care of, the house being clean, or the errands that were taken care of. I am honestly intimidated by them and have had a hard time quitting. I'm extremely unhappy and know I deserve better, but approaching them about anything gives me anxiety. I know it's best if I remove myself from the situation and find a family who appreciates everything i do, but I'm not sure how to say it. The family requires 3 weeks notice, so I am afraid that when I give notice my last weeks will be unbearable. I need advice as to how to approach them, and what my reasoning should be. Should I tell them the truth? Or blame it on myself?
at 5:23 AM