opinion 1
I am the poster of “Picking Battles is Causing a War for this Nanny” and I have another question. First off, everything has settled down and gone back to normal, and I am hoping that MB was just having a bad day. When I was offered the job I agreed to one night a week babysitting, pay for which would be included in my monthly wage. More recently MB has been asking me to babysit during the day, a few hours here a few hours there, fine. But now she has asked me to babysit this coming Sunday from 12pm-6pm. I feel that this is unfair and is practically a whole days work. Would it be unfair of me to ask for additional pay or a day off during the week? How would I go about asking?


Free!~ said...

Tell MB you have plans that day but can easily switch you plans to another day in the week. She doesn't need to know that your plans were just a day off ;)

Village said...

You have two choices. Either you stand up for yourself and say anything over the agreed upon times is $15 an hour to babysit, or you can just say you are busy. But you MUST NOT work for free. NEVER! It's your livelihood. You are a professional. You should be paid for your work.

You didn't ask, but if you have an employer whose habit seems to be getting you to work for nothing, it seems to me you need a new employer. JMHO.

MissMannah said...

I had the same problem with my last job, except I wasn't expected to work extra time for extra pay. The dad just got it into his head that he could ask me to work whenever he wanted me to (after hours) because I "owed" him for time off he had already paid me for. OP, it depends on how badly you want to keep this job and how well you know your bosses. I let it slide for a little while but my husband told me eventually to stand up for myself and ask for my regular rate of pay for ANY time worked over my standard hours. What happened the very next day? I got fired. Your question was would it be unfair for you? Absolutely not because you DESERVE that money or your day off. But like I said, if you think you might get fired, tread lightly!

Sorry if that was kind of jumbled and didn't make a lot of sense.

StrawberryShortKakes said...

If you and MB decided on a salary for XYandZ hours, then anything outside of those hours should be extra pay! If MB thinks it's ok to have you work more hours for the same pay, then you have a problem on your hands. I know it's tough but I think you should confront this problem ASAP. Tell MB that you agreed to certain hours and that anything outside those hours should be paid hourly. So if Sunday is your day off and you WANT to work, she should pay you for those hours separately from your salary. If you agree to work for free (essentially it is free because you wouldn't have had to work these hours to get your original pay!) she will do this to you again and again.

Tales from the (Nanny)Hood said...

OP, I am confused. Several questions for you:

Are you an au pair or a nanny?

What is your current, contracted, work schedule?

Is your MB asking for Sunday in addition to or instead of the evening sitting for the week?

I can likely offer some advice if you can answer my questions. ;-)

OP said...


I am a nanny. I don't have a contract because mum said she didnt "understand the english laws" enough to have one. (american family in england) I work monday-friday from 7.30-6.30, along with one night babysitting. She is asking for it instead of, which sounds fair enough but to me feels like a whole days work rather then 4 hours babysitting while the children are in bed.


MissMannah said...

OP, you should have argued with her on that one. You don't have to know the laws to write up a work agreement. Those things are rarely legally binding anyway. Besides, has she never heard of Google?

If she's asking you to do 6 hours on Sunday instead of 4 hours of night babysitting, technically she only owes you for 2 hours' work. The fact that the kids are sleeping or awake shouldn't make a difference. You need to just ask yourself if you want to quibble over 2 hours...and remember it can be a slippery slope...2 hours here, 3 hours next week, and so on.

StrawberryShortKakes said...

I was under the impression that MB wanted you to work on Sunday in addition to the original agreed-upon hours. Now that it's clear though, I still hold my original opinion that you should be paid more. It is one thing to "babysit" for a few hours on a day that you were already working. You're right, if she is asking you to do Sunday instead of those hours, you are going to be working more hours on a day that you originally planned to have off. Plus it's smack-dab in the middle of the day. I would just say NO.

My advice would be to make a contract. I feel like if you say NO to babysitting on Sunday, then she will say you owe her hours and it will be a whole big mess. Do yourself a favor and nip this in the bud with an agreement.

Tales from the (Nanny)Hood said...

OP, I'm still a little confused, mainly because I didn't ask what days you were babysitting in the afternoons. I'm going to guess it's weekends though, and go from there!

I think YOU need to google "nanny contracts", and write up a rough draft then go to your MB and DB and ask to sit down with them and work out a simple work agreement. Include specific work hours, specific "babysitting" parameters, your duties, your salary and benefits, etc.

As for the Sunday issue, you can either say you've already got plans and spend the day out of the house, or you can agree to do it one time only, because you need to be able to relax on your days off and get ready for your 55 hour work week. And yes, I would say exactly that to your MB.

Good luck!

Daria said...

I was working as a nanny for an European family who moved to usa. I had a "contract" because you need one when you go to the embassy to get your visa.

I often said no when they asked me to work additional hours outside of my 40h schedule. I would never trade an easy night of babysitting for a 6h workday on a Sunday. Since you already work 55h a week, you should not feel guilty for wanting to be off on Sun.

My employment lasted less than 3 months. If I had been more "flexible" I'm sure I would not have been fired.