I have kind of an unusal situation to discuss. I have been working as a nanny from Virginia to Boston for the past nine years. In my first nanny job, I became pregnant by my employer. I subsequently left the position and put the child, a boy up for adoption. I was only 20 at the time and worked as a live-in nanny, I had no home, family, etc. My employer is now widowed, his wife having passed to cancer and he used a private detective to find me. He now wants to find the child that was given up for adoption. I had told him I was pregnant. I had told the agency that I did not know who the father was. I am still working as a nanny, still a live-in. When I think about the fact that I have a seven year old son out there, I get overwhelmed with sadness. There is no benefit for me to get involved in this. I also have a job I like very much now and I am marrying a very religious person who does not know about the pregnancy and adoption. Do I tell him? I think I should. I think I want a restraining order against my former employer because I dont want any involvement with this. He has only been nice in contacting me, but this is too much to handle. Can I get a restraining order quietly? I don't want people to know about the reason behind it because it will reflect on my character. I was young and stupid. I live a decent and principled life now. I try to.