I have sort of a problem, and I was hoping you all could help me out with it. Okay a little about myself. I am 21 years old and going to school to get my degree in Elementary Education. I have been a part time nanny since I was 16 years old. I was with my first family for 3 years and then I moved to another city to go to college and was with that family for the past 2 years. I was recently let go by my second nanny family as "my" boys are both old enough to go to pre-school and they just don't need me anymore. I started with this family when the baby was 3 months old and the older child was 2. They're now 2 and 4 and now that I'm no longer with them, I miss them terribly. The mom and I still keep in touch, but it's still very strange for me to not see them every week.
After I was let go by that family, I was immediately hired by a new family with a 15 month old baby boy. The mom put on a great front during the interview and didn't bring up things like cleaning, cooking, or anything other then just taking care of the baby. I was hired on the spot and started the next week. On the first day with them, I just spent the day trying to get to know the baby and see what he was like, get some feel for a routine, etc. Since he had no real routine or anything, I asked the mom if I could implement one. I gave her sort of a timeline that would be easy to follow regarding lunch and naps and she said it was great. The next week when I went back for my second week, I was met at the door by the mom and a post it note. She had a very different demeanor and told me that she had left a post it note of chores for me to do. Cook dinner, do the laundry, do the dishwasher, dust, mop and vacuum, as well as organize all the toys that the baby has. To be honest, I was a bit shocked. I don't mind cleaning or doing meal prep, but to be met at the door with a post it note just seemed rude to me. Plus, the baby only takes one nap per day, when was I supposed to fit all those chores in? He's incredibly clingy and he will scream bloody murder if I try to walk out of the room without holding him.
By the third week, she had added going grocery shopping to the list, in addition to everything else. She isn't blatantly rude to me, but she seems bored when talking to me and has a fake interest in anything I say. I was at the playground with the baby, when I saw my former boss and boys and I almost cried with joy at seeing them. I am sad that I don't have that close relationship with my new employer and I feel like the baby hates me. All he does is cry around me. I try to play with him, I sing to him, I take him places, yet, I can get him to laugh only rarely and I feel like he resents me or something. It's been 7 weeks and we still haven't really bonded. Is this a bad sign? I feel like it's my fault.
There are other things that I just find strange as well. One day the dad boss came home from work early, before the mom got home. I was speaking with him about the baby and we were laughing about something. The mom came in the door and started glaring at me, like I wasn't allowed to speak with her husband. I'm not attractive, so I don't think she's worried about him cheating on her with me. Another time, I got there in the morning and saw that the baby was playing with a meat tenderizer. I distracted him and took it away from him as I felt that he was going to poke his eye out with the stick of it. I put it on the counter and when she came back in the room, she made a comment like "oh, that's right, I'm a bad mom" and then laughed. I started to explain myself, but she walked out of the door. The mom also refers to me as "the nanny,"
never my name, when she speaks to friends and family. My other employers always used my name, regardless of whether or not the other person knew who I was.
In three weeks, my college courses will begin again. I will work during the day and go directly from work to school for 3 hours per night. I am terrified that I won't have time to focus on my school work, as my original plan was to do homework and such while the baby was sleeping. When I spoke with the mom upon our interview, she agreed to this, however now with my massive list of chores, I don't know where I'll find the time. I hate admitting this, but I feel like I may not be what this family is looking for. Should I start looking for a new family to work for? My friend made a comment to me the other day about how sad I seem now and I think that I'm just really not enjoying my job anymore. I'm a great nanny and have tons of other families who love me, but I just feel like this family doesn't. I've never had to deal with anything like this before. Can someone give me some type of suggestion or something? Please help, I have no one to turn to. None of my friends are nannies, so they don't understand. I don't want to let this family down, but I have to do what I feel is right for me, right? Thanks.