How Should Nanny Approach MB About Pay?

opinion 2 My grandmother just passed away last night. The funeral is several hours away and I need to take 2 full days off of work. I know I am stupid for this, but I don't have a contract with my family. I was a brand new nanny when I started with them 2 years ago and I didn't know any better. I only work 3 days a week for them (30 hours) and I am paid my full weekly amount even if she only needs me for 20 hours or so. My question is, do you guys think I should expect to be paid for taking these two days off? MB is a doctor and really can't call out so I don't know what she is going to do. I don't think I've ever called out before in two years so I'm not sure if I will get my full pay or not.

I'm going to the funeral regardless, but I really can't afford to miss one week's payment. I am scheduled to work on Friday and I will be back to do so, so MB might just doc me two days pay. How would you guys handle this? Thanks!
My apologies for not posting sooner, I did not realize this was time sensitive.


Nanny who loves what she does said...

Just tell them... If they don't understand... they are not the family for you. Maybe ask for 1/2 day pay. Talk to her about it.

Wow said...

Talk to her about it and ask if you can be paid since you have not called out before. Explain that you have learned that most nannies receive paid time off.

Do your research, and after you return to work ask to schedule a meeting with MB and DB. Share with them what you've learned in your research and include the fact that you've learned that you need to have a contract and that you would like to have paid days off. If they don't want to allow you that, you have to make a decision whether that's acceptable or if you need to start looking for another job.

Sunny said...

I am sure they will understand. If they aren't going to pay you salary, you have a few choices; Figure out your hourly wage and subtract that from your weekly salary for the days you are going to be gone, or see if you can work some extra hours to make up for the time you were gone. That way neither of you would be missing out on pay/care.

Peace to you and your family-S

mom said...

I don't think you can expect to be paid for missing work if you are part time. I pay my sitter if I cancel on her but don't pay her if she cancels on me. Most part time jobs aren't salaried anyway- you get paid for the hours you work.

another nanny said...

OP, it seems reasonable that they would pay you for this time, since they usually pay the same regardless of hours worked. Also, many jobs offer bereavement leave, outside of accumulated sick or vacation time, with the understanding that this is outside your control. Hopefully your employers also understand that. My condolences on your loss.

apple, ear said...

Don't mention pay for now. Assume the best. Just apologize for needing to take "bereavement leave" <-- say it that way) last minute. People in all industries take leave and you should be no different if she is getting regular work with you each week.

Let her decide on her own that it would be unconscionable to leave you without the ability to support yourself after 2 yrs of reliable care, for a family death. That way she gets to feel generous rather than asked for it.

If she doesn't pay you (I bet she will, though), mention most employees have paid personal time off yearly, used for anything like illness, vacation, or bereavement.

I suspect your boss understands that it's in everyone's best interest to treat her children's nanny well. It would be a slap in the face to make you stress about finances when you're already grieving the loss of your G'ma.

My condolences.

Just My Two Cents Just Now said...

OP I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved Grandmother. My sincere condolences to you and your family.

Anyway, I would just not say anything and see what MB will do. If she pays you for the two days (which by the way, would be the ethical thing to do), I would tell her "Thank You" graciously. After all, you have worked for her for two years and have a proven reliability record to boot.
If MB gives you permission to leave, yet doesn't pay you for the two days, then I think that would be a pretty crummy thing for her to do. She isn't legally obligated to pay you for the time not worked, however considering the circumstance here, it would be the right thing to do. As a Dr. if she cannot call in sick, then it is her and only her responsibility to have a back-up plan for childcare. Anyone w/her type of job requirement who didn't arrange a back-up plan is nuts in my opinion. You are a human being and anything can happen.

Anyway, I hope your MomBoss did the right thing in this situation and things worked out. (Re: this was written awhile ago.)

Good Luck OP.

OP said...

Hi Everyone. OP here. When I got back from the funeral and worked that Friday, I said to her, "Do I get my check this week?" (I have to ask her EVERY week for my check. If not, she will let me leave on a Friday without being paid. No one said being a doctor means you're smart!) She said, "Yes, if you want the full amount you can make up the 2 days that you missed. If you just want to be paid for one day, you don't have to make up the days." So, guess what I'm doing all weekend...working! Working while they are home sleeping, relaxing, doing nothing!!! Oh well, at least I'm not losing any pay. Just sucks to work on the weekend and not be able to be with my son. Thanks everyone for your condolences. My grandma was almost 90 and we are all a bit relieved she isn't suffering anymore.

Parttimer said...

I've worked part-time in businesses and households and never received paid time off, whether it was sick/personal leave or holiday pay. Your employer is a doctor--chances are that she was not able to see clients during the two days you were out so she lost income or the opportunity to get other work out of the way (insurance paperwork, billing, phone calls). Or she had to pay someone else to watch the children. What I would expect from an employer would be that she would act kindly to me during this time of grief and let me take time off for the funeral without making me feel guilty for inconveniencing her with short notice. Allowing me to make up the time or paying me for the time off would be generous but not expected. What she does during the time she is paying you to watch the children is not relevant.

MissMannah said...

I lol-ed at "No one said being a doctor means you're smart!" My last nanny job, the mom was a doctor and just like you, I always had to remind her to pay me. Usually the dad wrote me a check Friday morning but when he was out of town, I had to chase down the mom for my check. And she never, ever understood how to deduct taxes. She thought the amount her husband wrote the check out for was my gross so she was all the time asking how much she owes me. Argh!

Anyway, I think it is kind of sucky you had to work on the weekend, but I can totally see a doctor-mom saying that too. It is logical and it helps you financially, even if it isn't warm and friendly like most of us would expect during a period of mourning.

I hope you and your family are doing ok.

Reese said...

OP, I am sorry for your loss. 90 yrs is a full life and I hope your grandmother lived her life to the fullest. Yes, she is no longer suffering and that is what is most important now. She is at peace. R.I.P = Rest In Paradise.....

Anyway, I think considering you are only part-time now, your MomBoss was fair. She offered you a day's pay for two days of not working which I think is generous. I work 30 hrs per wk and I do not receive any benefits when I do not work. And get this....when the family decides at the last minute to take a day off, they text me and then do not pay me. Also, on occasion one of the parents may come home early unexpectedly and they dock my pay a few hours. So, I think your boss is being fair. In my situation, if I do not work, I do not get paid. Period. ;(