Tuesday

Nanny Doesn't Mince Words When Explaining her Job History

Received Tuesday, August 17, 2010
perspective and opinion Dear Fellow nannies, I have been a nanny since 1986, child care certifed and although I have read this blog there are some things pointing out to me that reminds me of some of my past jobs:

I worked for a woman on long island, nice lady, divorced one child, her boyfriends ex-girlfriend decided to make false accusations about me to cps. I did everything I was asked to do even for the child and more, I played with him, we went for walks, I took him to nursery school, his mother and I went out dancing when he visted his father, they treated me well. The pay sucked $125.00 a week and no raise but it was ok for a starter job. Anyways this ex-gf made accusations that were down and out lies, the mother was calling every parent to see if I was good to her child which was insulting because she knew I never do a thing to a child, so after two days of being treated like crap and hurt, I left the job. I explained to her "I can no longer work under conditions where I am falsly accused of things I didn't do" and she understood. A yr later all charges were dropped when cps found out it was all a lie and I found out from the mothers now ex-bf what had happened, he even stuck up for me and told her "do you honestly think she would do those things to your son, you making her feel bad and shes crying, thats so wrong, talk to her and ask her yourself don't call people in hearing distance and make it worse then it is" to say the least they broke up.

Hint, suggestion - when you work as a nanny try not to get to comfy with your employers.

Next job was a doosie, a divorcee 4 kids one being a baby, now granted this mother was a flipping nut case and she was a tramp to say the least, but her kids were my priority and the baby well he was a doll. I did everything for what $125.00 as well and more, no extra pay for OT, no respect at all. She treated her ex-husband like crap, he actually was a nice guy, well when she started cheating with my bf and went to florida with the baby and him and lied to me and I saw the pictures all heck broke loose. I left the job, called her a few things and a liar as well, and informed her ex-husband of what went down. She cranked called my house all through the nights and tried to lie to a doctor one of my family told the doctor just in case, well don't you
know the woman lied and the doctor called police on her and she and another friend who came up with thier idea {which I had on tape thanks to my answering machine} got arrested and the kids went to dad. Because of her and her games, I took the phone off the hook the night my aunt
died and I felt guilty about that along time.

Hint - see red flags before it's too late.

I went to an agency. I liked it because the woman who ran it found me two jobs. Omg, ok the first one great, awsome. The couple was really nice, had four kids, I did house work. I was called white wind by her husband, lol. I was treated very well, sometimes the woman give me things, they were just really nice nothing bad to say. The company the husband worked for was having problems, so he had to let me go. My pay every week was $250.00 and he even gave me extra pay when they let me go {showed respect to me}. I liked that job alot. {Recently they moved to
Fl and their son, who was my favorite, was killed by someone in 2007. I still think about that.}

Hint - when you have the dream job, being a nanny is worth it.

Second job, omg, I wish I had left sooner. The woman was a b word, her husband was ok but her son was a brat and her daughter was cute. I liked the job ok $250.00 every two weeks {huh} and although I did alot of cleaning, cooking etc, I was never compinsated for OT ever. I got sick
days when I had teeth removed or was sick with the flu, but then I went to Fl with them and whats my personal buisness should be just that. I dated someone there, I liked him not right away but in the future anyways when we got back not only did this woman call all her snotty friends and tell them my business but she just made me mad. She snooped through my things{she said her kid did} I doubt that and then said I was fired no severance pay nothing, ok, so I left, I didn't want to go to Fl anyway.

Hint - employers need to stay put of nannies business unless it has to do with the job, what you do on your time off is your business.

Then the job from hell. A single father with a daughter who was a witch and a older son who wasn't my problem. The father was an ass, a mean sob, who got into my business one too many times. His daughter was a handful, she wansn't allowed to watch tv all the time, fine, he wanted me to do things that hey I don't do like wax your floor dude. Anyways this guy was a jerk, he liked to shout and I won't take verbal abuse from anyone, so I left.

Hint - if an employer treats you meanly, verbally abuses you, stand up for yourself and leave, you are a human being, you deserve respect.

I had too many jobs to say I loved them all, I didn't, wishful thinking if you would love every job you ever had. Worked for a single dad going through a divorce. When a father allows a child to listen to rap music expect the youngest kid to repeat a word thats not so nice, and be accused and fried for it, it happened. The eldest kid liked rap music and one song was by salt n peppa ahhh me so h. Anyways the youngest kid said the H word and her brother heard it, the father was told by the eldest kid I taught her that meanwhile the kid was trying to get rid of me day one because of their mother leaving {ok I understand} but the father wasn't gonna listen to me, he wanted to talk I said no, you said all you had to say, you accused me falsly and that hurts "I said listen to the rap music your kids listen to", well I packed my things and left.

Hint - remember kids can be sneaky and mean.

The next job was a widower and while I felt bad for his two girls, he was outright stupid, I mean it. He kept the memeory of their mother out of their lives which hurt, he signed them up for drama, dancing, etc. These kids had no play time, no being a kid it was sick. I honestly think he did it to find a date for himself because it was selfish of him not to allow the kids to be kids. I understood when they cried they needed a hug, I understood they needed to feel loved, what I didn't understand was the temper tatrums one pulled. Example, twirling contest I had to sit through when their father should of been there, the kid wanted something I didn't have the money for. I had to call her father from the school to straiten her out. Example two, sledding, because she was too tired threw a massive fit in the street which almost made me get hit by a car no less, the neighbors were peeking at the doors thinking I was hurting the kid. When I got her home, forget about it all bets were off, I made her get into her pjs, lay on the couch and
not move till her father came home. Well when he found out he spanked her after I had already punished her, I grounded her from going outside for the weekend, which made me more mad. He acted like no big deal to me. It may of not been but he underminded me, then I suggested he take his girls to talk to their mother at the cemetary because they needed that, well at first he was reluctant. But the neighbor who was very nice told me he went through 4 nannies in a yr because of the way he treated them and the way his eldest daughter acted. I can't blame them at all, I was the longest, 5 months, all the rest were 2 months. She said "I'm surprised you haven't left yet." Then one day the eldest throws a fit about not wanting to go to school, the neighbor whose known them since babies came out and spanked one on the butt and told her "you will do as you are told and get to school, give {me} any more trouble she'll tell their dad." Well she did tell him what was going on, do you know he came back and said "don't talk to my neighbor" his
daughters weren't angels by far. I left the job, why? Because the man was so blinded by wanting a gf and went as far and hummmm doing his thing in the bathroom one night to relieve his aching, you know what he never flushed it, ick, to his constant verbal out breaks to his taking his kids sides when he knew they were wrong. When I heard their mother was laying there dying on the couch of cancer and both kids jumped around on the couch, it made me sick that he allowed that, then to go to a church pleading I need help which is how I got the job from friend, I was mad, the man was a phoney.

Hint - make your own list of questions and what you expect as well.

Last one, a doc and her idiot english husband who was a pig. Ok I took a job $300.00 a week from a doc who was ok, she treated me to lunch and things but her son was a handful, the baby was ok. I was sued badly, first had to go to early morning swimmming classes on a saturday, second had to sit so she could go home and sleep, with the baby in two at his t-ball practice, oh joy, then off saturday afternoon till sunday evening, during the week lite housekeeping, child care, to and from bus stop with the oldest and omg karate classes and making me sit in Friendlys with two kids for an hour while she and he took their classes, then to top it off she plans a last min trip to Fl, with extra friends. She had the big ones to volunteer me to baby sit not just her
two kids but five of her friends kids, no f-ing way, I was hired to care for hers and if she was gonna offer me huh, she better come up with a thousand dollars all together. Oh she said you'll get one night to do what you want, one night hey lady I want all my nights free, then her
brat says "when we get back my mom and dad are gonna fire you." For what? I did my job well, why because I want a day off? I was gonna ask her but got too mad at the florida thing to begin with then her husband who was english walked around in his draws with his private showing, I
had to ask her to have him cover up, I don't wanna see it, I forget in England their free over there, naked wise, however it was insulting. Then as you burped lets say the kid be saying don't say excuse me say parden me, who is a child to correct an adult? I left them a week before her Fl trip and game.

Hint - don't let a family take advantage of you, of your time, well being, don't let them walk all over you.

Now I have shared some of my jobs, I will say this, I have worked for so many yrs, my favorite are single dads. I have also worked for low income familes as well, I like being a nanny alot, I love kids but there are some things I won't tolerate either, being taken advantage of, verbally abused, cheated, lied about and most of all being treated with disrespect, if I treat you with kindess expect the same.

- Bay Shore, NY nanny, over 14 yrs.

27 comments:

Ho Hum said...

Hint-Learn to write a coherent post. I am not sure if English is your first language or not, but I gave up reading halfway through. Also, it seems you have a history of accepting bad positions and then complaining about it later. I hope, for your sake, you are no longer in the childcare field.

Bostonnanny said...

I can't believe you were ever a nanny. From your explanations of your previous positions, it clearly shows how unprofessional you are and how little you know about children. I guess these positions were the only ones you could get based on that. I really hope you are still not a nanny and I still can't get over the fact that an agency actually accepted you.

Blob said...

It just seems that this is a bit of a put-on surely? Someone who has been a nanny for over 14 years but started in 1986? Have you been unemployed for the last 10 years because you're a dreadful nanny? Also you do not sound like someone that should be around children at all!

Phoenix said...

Wow you guys are really mean to the poster. She shared some personal experiences and you degrade her. WTF?

nycnanny said...

Wow, it seems like drama really follows you everywhere you go...

Piscespets said...

What is the H-word?

Phoenix said...

I think it is horny based off the song she was describing

wake up. said...

I have to agree with Phoenix. I'm rather ashamed of most of the above posters: are you all so naive to really think that a nanny is unprofessional if she doesn't allow herself to be disrespected and taken advantage of? Doesn't understand kids??? Please. Here's a newsflash: childcare is a job. That is all it is. You can love children, and be wonderful with children, but if you work for assholes, it makes the job suck, and also if you are an asshole your kids are assholes and your nanny is trying her damndest to raise your little assholes.

OP does not seem unprofessional to me at all. She seems human. And honest.

Good job, OP. I applaud you.

Marypoppin'pills said...

Thank you, Phoenix... it is horny.

Let's try to take it easy on the OP guys, ok?

CanadianMom said...

You seem to be blaming and judging the parents, children, etc., but maybe you also contributed to the problems; you certainly didn't learn to make good job choices or find ways to solve issues that came up. However, I did feel quite sympathetic towards you in most cases where it sounded like you worked for nasty people ... but then I read this: "during the week lite housekeeping, child care, to and from bus stop with the oldest and omg karate classes and making me sit in Friendlys with two kids for an hour while she and he took their classes," Umm, aren't those just job duties? Wow. Remember to tell the next family you work for that you don't want to take their kids to activities such as karate classes, that will go down really well. ;)

I know we are meant to be sympathetic to posters but you can't write stuff like this and expect everyone to pat you on the back.

Ho Hum said...

I'm sorry, but you had a problem with every single job you worked at. And a lot of the problems you say you have had are duties that come with being a nanny. While the job can be difficult when the parents are rude, you chose to take and stay in those positions. I do not believe people on being hard on you. If you choose to post in a public forum, then you should be able to handle honest opinions. Good luck with your future jobs.

Bostonnanny said...

How can anyone call her professional based on what she wrote...did ppl actually read the entire post?
She complains about parents not allowing there children to watch tv, having to take them to sports and other activities.
She shows no real sense of how to properly discipline a child.... I put her on the couch and made her lay there until her father came home? She allowed neighbors to spank and reprimand her charge.
She went with a family to florida on vacation and started dating? Seriously, I know u have your own time but it's a work related vacation not yours.

The only thing I can say, is that her "hints" are good and the fact that she left these families shows common sense, but she has been fired multiple times....something is seriously wrong, it can't all be the parents or children's fault.

One more thing why would mb's ex boyfriend's gf call cps on the nanny? Wouldn't she call it on the mother? And a year for it to be cleared is a long time for something that false and should have been easily proven false.

Meme said...

With all due respect and as little drama-inducing as possible, I have to say that I am sort of on team Ho Hum/Bostonnanny.

The difficulty I had even reading this notwithstansing, if you had one or two bad experiences I could understand but when the bad sitatuations come time and time again, it may be time to look in the mirror.

mom_of_one said...

I think Ho Hum's 2nd post said it best. I don't think you should get ragged for your awful grammar, but if you are going to post here your multitude of problems with each employ, you are going to get an earful. In my opinion, you have to carry some of the blame because it sounds like you didn't truly enjoy some of the duties that would be considered normal in every day nanny jobs.

Angelina said...

I am a nanny who has (until recently) considered leaving the nanny profession. Why? I had gone through multiple families...possibly 20-30. I usually met my families through Craigslist (I don't know if that had anything to do w/it or not). Anyway, I always ran into the same problems w/each and every family. I.e., not being paid on time, not being paid right amount/underpaid, bounced checks, having add'l duties/children added over time, bad family chemistry, etc. My friends were even skeptical of me as well which I cannot blame them for as I was also having my doubts. I told myself each day, "Why is this happening to me over and over? I love children so much, am a genuine good person and have the best work ethic ever.." yet time and time again, I couldn't last more than a few wks at any given Nanny job. It wasn't until I met my current family that I realized the problem wasn't ME...it really wasn't..it was with the families I worked for. My current family pays me on time, the full amount and does not try to rip me off. They do not give me any more responsibility than what they originally asked me for (I hate Job Creep!!) and they respect me enough that I am the one who loves their daughter as they would if they didn't have to go to work every day. It's sad that I had to go through multiple families to realize all this, and I miss the children I cared for immensely to this day, however instead of placing blame on the Nanny, one should look at the family as well.
Nannies let's be real, there are many families who view nanny work as low class since no specific academic "degree" is required, etc. Childcare work is often underpaid (i.e., teachers, daycare workers, etc.) However, I personally believe it is one of the most important fields out there due to the lasting impact a nanny and/or teacher has on a child's life. While there are some great families out there (I have read about some on here + I work for one myself), a lot of them are cheap, take us nannies for granted and do not respect our line of work. So just because OP went through all of these families, does not necessarily mean that she is a bad nanny.

Meme said...

Angelina...you dont have to have been a "bad nanny." Sometimes with their attitudes or lack of self-respect, inability to communicate properly, doesn't stand up for themselves...whatever it may be...one can "invite" such circumstances on themselves. Doesn't make them bad nannies or bad people, but still the blame lies on them.

MissMannah said...

What I found odd was that OP had all these "hints" but she didn't seem to take any of them. Did she not figure anything out until she had completely quit the field and had time to reflect on her mistakes? She took one bad job after another. Meme said it right, if you don't have any self-respect and you can't communicate properly, people WILL take advantage of you. A lot of parents want to squeeze every penny's worth out of their nanny and unfortunately a lot of nannies just bend over and take it.

PS: The writing in this post was atrocious. I really hope to god English is not her first language.

Meme said...

As I am attempting to re-read this chaos of a post, I have to ask...did anyone notice that almost every mom was a b*tch or a tramp and every dad or ex-husband was a great guy (excpet for the OP's own man, who ran off with her MB)?

IDK about the rest of you, but that seems troubling, at best, and speaks volumes about why all her jobs may not have worked out, at worst.

yeppers said...

Meme said: "did anyone notice that almost every mom was a b*tch or a tramp and every dad or ex-husband was a great guy."

Yeah, I did. Guess I'm not the only one. What do you think about that?

(Maybe she has issues with other women and that's why the jobs with mom's fail.)

Meme said...

Thats kind of what I was thinking Yeppers. Not that she necessarily wanted the men but that she just perhaps has issues getting along with women.

East Bay Nanny said...

Meme, you have lots of good points. Like some of the other posters have pointed out, there's one common theme running through each job...the OP.

That's what contracts are for, right? I learned the hard way what happens when you don't have one. After my job from hell a wonderful family and I found each other, we had a contract and it's been great.

I completely agree with the posters who say that if you don't have confidence and boundaries you'll take whatever crap people pour out, and I think that's part of the reason why so many nannies have so many problems. May we all have fully developed backbones!

MONKEYSHINES said...

The single dad's are the best!!!

twinmom said...

totally agree that this was disturbing to reard and i know these are just monikers but mary "poppin pills" doesnt sit well with me. perhaps that is part of the problem.

Marypoppin'pills said...

Twinmom,
Not sure why you are taking offense to my moniker but if it is because you think I am the Author of this Post, you are incorrect.

I work for ISYN and Publish these Articles, not write them.

Lighten up... it was meant to be a humorous poke at an obsessive-compulsive fairytale Nanny!

formertwinnanny said...

twin mom:

are you my old boss? I used to work for a mom of twins and she was the worst boss ever.

worst.
boss.
ever.

pay attention said...

If this nanny was so good, why didn't she do the spankings herself! OP is an obvious lying loser.

Will said...

It's completely dependent on the parenting technique you and, more importantly, the parents prefer. Give the girl a break!