Received Tuesday, June 22, 2010
This nanny text for 2 hours on 6/21, ignored baby in stroller while he cried until she noticed my dirty looks. Paid no attention to the toddler she was watching. He got stuck on playground equipment twice and I helped him. He was even playing with dog poop!!! I pointed this out to her and she wiped his hands with a baby wiped and continued to text. Toddler could of and would of injured himself if I wasn't there, and someone could of easily abducted him. Children were Asian. One under 1 yr of age the other around 2 yrs old wearing a blue tshirt with sharks. I wouldn't let her watch my pet fish, let alone precious children!!! Tried to follow her so I could find mom, but she went into Borders on Michigan Ave and I had to feed my own children.
26 comments:
While I agree that this is yet another bad nanny...do you really think following her to "tattle tell" on her is such a good idea? I mean come on!
Yes, I do. The toddlers life was endangered! I try to live by the Golden Rule! If this was my little boy stuck on a ladder crying for help and my nanny ignored and a stranger had to help, I would want someone to show up to my house and tell me. If my toddler climbed to the top of a flight of stairs meant for 5-12 year olds and got scared and again my nanny couldn't even see him, or hear him, I'd want someone to tell me. If people don't "tattle" how do you stop abuse or neglect? She sat there the entire time, she couldn't even see this toddler.I'm use to seeing the nannies on the phone, they might not beMarry Poppins but at least the kids are in front of them. She wasn't able to see the toddler because of where she sat and because she was very much into her text for 2 hours.
Furthermore, if my toddler played in dog shit because my nanny wasn't watching him and he didn't get sanitized yes I'd want someone to come to my house and tell me!! If my infant sat in extreme heat and humidity crying and the only reason my nanny picked him up was because a stranger gave her dirty looks, I'd want someone to tell me. My concern is standing up for this child and as a society we need to do more of that. Please explain why informing the mother is anything but a good idea?
I think if I was the nanny and had someone following me home I would call the police and report being stalked. How does she know you aren't a person following her home to case the joint? I'm sure that isn't the case and it is a good sighting, but especially in a large city, it would make me uncomfortable to have someone following me.
I don't believe you that it was 2 full hours. That is a really long time.
I know 2 hrs is a long time because it was hot and I wanted to get out of there but I felt bad for the kids and I wanted to find a way to let this mom know! I kept asking everyone if they knew her!my iPhone tracks the timing of the pictures, if this mom ever contacts me she can see the evidence for herself. I took multiple pictures of the toddler alone. I wish she would have called the police! Hopefully this would get me to the mom or dad!
OP/anonymous:
I think you did your best and if I were in your shoes... I probably would have done the same thing.
As for following a bad Nanny home to alert the Parents... of course you would want to be as stealth as possible. We don't want to frighten the kids and have them think they are being stalked.
And 2 hours texting is nothing! I have seen it done.
OP, you might want to learn proper grammar before the next time you decide to go on a public blog and spout nonsense. At least then people will be able to look at you as a credible witness. The way the post is now, it's just uneducated drivel.
OP, sorry you are getting attacked. I admit I tend to have a healthy skepticism of sightings, just to give the benefit of the doubt where possible, but this seems like a good one. You rescued the kid, alerted the nanny to situations that needed her attention, posted here, and generally went to great lengths to try to help. On this board, though, you can never win- you either did too much or not enough.
Good job OP! Thank you for posting it. I really hope the parents see your post and find out about their "Nanny".
Regarding the following, especially in a big city, you can't notice if someone is following you or just walking the way you are.
I live in NYC and there a 20-30 people "following" me from the subway to my work place every day :)!
So again: Good job!
As a long-time Chicago nanny, I can say that this is not unusual in the slightest. No matter what place you take your charges - the Lincoln Park Zoo, the Nature Museum, Pump It Up, any parks or Starbucks or public areas - there are consistently terrible nannies in evidence...texting like zombies, ignoring the children they are tasked with watching, and talking among themselves with no regards to their job responsibilities. It is sickening to think that the parents have no idea - because you know these nannies have the phones in their purses and are all Mary Poppins in the families' homes (that is, when the parents are there - I shudder to think of how much neglect is occurring when they're not)! I think you did the right thing, OP. If I were a parent, I would want to know what my hard-earned dollars were paying for. ESPECIALLY when the safety of my children was at stake!
THIS is why more people don't step forward and report what they see. Grammar police, doubters, etc. If this were my kid I wouldn't care about the grammar or the following or any other things OP is being attacked for. I'd want to know about this! Thanks for the sighting OP. As a mom in Chicago area, I appreciate it and I agree we need to look out for one another...or at least for the children.
All other issues aside, I find the original post perfectly readable.
Dear Just A Suggestion,
As I am uneducated, could you please point out my nonsense? Was it trying to help two children? Was it trying to inform a mother or father? I think angry nannies get on this site and bash the OP because they are unhappy with themselves. People in general bash others because they are miserable. Try to spread love and not anger, life is much better that way!!!
OP - I am a member of the local Chicago board where this was also posted through a second party you talked to. I wanted to let you know that while people might not be supportive on here, people on the other board will continue to bump up the posting and help to find this parent. It's happened before on that board. I believe you did the right thing. As a former nanny, and now a mother in Chicago, I see the shittest nannies all day long, and I'm tired of it. Go shake salt on french fries at McDonalds if you want to have a meaningless, mindless job.
Letting a child eat dog shit = crappy nanny.. there's no arguing that.
Op- just ignore the a-holes on here. I understand your wanting to find the parents and let them know but following them home isn't a good idea. They could have called the police on you and the whole sighting could have been for nothing because the parents would most likely believe their nanny before someone their nanny called the cops on. Although she might not have noticed since she seemed like testing zombe. Next time ask the children what their full names are and address or number if they seem old enough. Because most parents teach their children that incase they get lost. Or you play nice with the nanny and have a convo to get the information that way.
I do know and have seen with my own eyes nannies and even parents(who are guilty too of this,) chatting on the phone and texting when their children are running wild all over the park unattended. Clearly in these situations the children are not being watched well at all and you can tell the parent and or nanny is killing time and I agree excessive/distracting phone use can lead to dangerous situations. Plus as I have said before I truly feel that this rule does not hold to just child care providers but parents too. But does anyone ever stop to think just maybe the nanny is texting/talking to the parents of the children and that's why its taking a long time or why they are being held up on the phone? I mean I am a nanny myself and everyday my charge's mother calls to check in or has a question when we are at the park, and if she is in a meeting and cannot personally call she texts me or emails me(I have a blackberry,) so my question is if you saw me on the phone or texting at the park would you automatically assume I was killing time, or goofing off? Would you demand my employers number and name? Would you follow me home? What if I am talking/texting my boss or setting up a meeting time for playgroup? Ever think of that?
I guess what I am saying is sometimes people THINK there is neglect when it could be their boss calling or important situation comes up. In this case this may have been a clear case of neglect but in the future maybe people should do more than just make assumptions based on a brief encounter they had at the park.
Heck! Today I saw a little boy roll off the top of the jungle gym and get hurt and his MOTHER was no where near or in sight! I stood there for 20 minutes waiting with the little boy and asking everyone who passed by if they knew a mother named Clair. The little boy was scared so I asked how old he was he said 5, I asked him if he was here at the park with a babysitter or mommy he said mommy and told me her name and couldn't see her. He said she was at the picnic table. And instead of telling the little boy to come with a stranger around the park I felt it was best I stay right where he was until mother was found.
Let me ask you, if you were in my shoes today when the mother finally showed up unconcerned and annoyed that I had a perplexed look on my face which she did, whould you have given her a good talking too? Would you have followed her home and called the cops to report neglect? I doubt it. Simply because it was a parent not a nanny. You would have done what I did and tell her he was hurt and scared.
Why is everyone attacking the OP? If what she saw was legit then that nanny needs a boot in the ass!
Neglect of children by nannies or parents is wrong!! No one on this site is saying parents can neglect children and it's ok. I don't care if it was President of the United States was texting her, I don't care if it was the mom herself, or if it was God. It was not just about the texting. She sat in an area of the park where she could not see this boy!! The park equipment was not even meant for children his age. He was totally alone!! She wasn't texting and following him. She was sitting down and had no idea what he was doing. It was physically impossible to see him from where she was at and where he was at. If I text my nanny, I expect her to answer, but not while driving and not at the expense of my children's well being!! She could of text while following the boy. Not ideal but at least she would have noticed he was stuck on the equipment twice. She would have possibly smelled the shit he was playing with and throwing up into the air. No emergency text excuses sitting down and letting a 2 year old play without observing him in a park beyond his means!! I've posted and there is nothing more I can do. I'm not going to continue to waste my time replying to irrational postings. If your a good nanny, you shouldn't worry about this website or what other parents are thinking. You can spot a good nanny right away!! She is engaged with the children. She is in the playground with them. She is there play partner. They rarely exist. I'm done, this is a waste of my time.
I didn't mean to say that it wasn't a good sighting, just wondering about following the person. Of course, I don't live in a big town.
Think then speak- There's a difference between sending Mom a text and being glued to your phone for 2 hours. If it's non-critical communication, it might have to wait until the kids are in the sandbox. If it needs to be addressed right away and the kids clearly cannot manage by themselves, I make them wait in the stroller. They might not like it, but 2 minutes of whining beats a trip to the ER any day. And honestly, I do not know any parents, even the most difficult, who would want their nanny texting them while the baby screamed in the stroller and the toddler ate dog shit.
NJNanny that is definitely what she should have done! At least she was doing something? I don't think you should follow someone where it would put you in danger but how do you know the babies mother knows about this site? If I saw someone ignore children like that and could try to follow them I would. The child was playing with dog poop!
Also, why are some people attacking the op? People should post things like this, this is definitely a bad nanny sighting! The person attacking is probably the same person over and over and the nanny in question!
And there is a HUGE difference between checking a text on your phone, sending one etc and being on it for two hours!
I'm not sure how anyone could argue that never looking up from your phone for 2 whole hours while the baby plays with dog poop is probably a case of answering an urgent call from your employer.
OP, don't mind the assholes here. If some stranger had to alert my nanny that my toddler was playing with dog poop I'd fire her even if she DID use hand sanitizer on him after the fact. That's inexcusable. Much more so than having bad grammar.
And just have to point out to Boston Nanny, if the kids are taught their full names and addresses in case of emergency, I would *hope* they are also being taught not to give out that information to random strangers at playgrounds who engage them in conversation.
Cali mom you would be suprised by how much information you can get out of a young child who is being ignored by caregivers and are seeking attention. I could find out their entire lives (depending on age) just by caring enough to talk to them and being friendly. You can teach your child not to give Information out but they aren't adults they can't always control themselves or realize what they are doing.
Children are so precious and yet parents don't like to pay for childcare.. Imagine that..
NannyAnn, f you don't like what you are getting paid, don't take the job. Being unhappy with your salary doesn't mean you get to neglect the children you agreed to look after. Don't punish the children because you are unhappy!! A nanny should only prevent a 2 year old from eating shit or falling off equipment if she is paid well? Any decent human being would help a child, paid or unpaid! No one knows the facts of what she is being paid. She might be very well paid, maybe not. Either way you don't jeopardize the lives of the children you have been trust with because you don't get enough $$. I feel bad for the children you watch.
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