Received Thursday, November 26, 2009
I worked for family Y for over a year. I started when their daughter was 7 weeks old. The baby was born with some temporary, medical problems. I knew this when I started. The medical problems escalated...and sometimes were hard to deal with. But I was attached to the baby, and stuck it out. I have years of nanny experience, but no medical training.
The family did a lot for me while I worked for them...helped me buy a car, gave me wonderful bonuses and presents. I felt like I really was part of the family. I got along great with them.
Last May..at my 1 year anniversary mark..I found out I was pregnant. I told them this right away, and we discussed options a few weeks later. I assumed I could bring the baby to work due to previous conversations before I found out I was pregnant. They told me they didn't want me to do this. It broke my heart..but I said nothing. I felt I needed to collect my thoughts before saying anything. They also told me they planned on only working me 30 hours a week, but giving me a raise..so I ended up making almost the same amount as a 40 hour week. This was going to be nice..I would only work 3 days a week instead of 4 or 5.
I discussed the options with my husband..and decided I couldn't drop my own infant off with strangers to go take care of another person's baby so they didn't have to do the same. I also should mention they only expected me to take a 6 week maternity leave.
My husband and I decided this would be a good time for me to FINALLY go back to school full time. We were making plans for me to quit work in December, a few weeks before the baby was due. I would take internet classes in January. We were going to use financial aid as our financial backup. We were also on a strict savings plan.
I hadn't discussed this with family Y yet. One day the mother told me she met a former nanny who took her baby to work and said it worked out fine. She was reconsidering the option of letting me bring my own baby. I was so happy. This meant I could continue making income for our family and also not have the expense of daycare.
A month or so passes and the mother talks to me about hiring someone part time..just 10 hours a week so I don't have to be at work so early in the morning..I arrived at 7. This person would also be my backup if I couldn't come in for some reason and also cover me during my maternity leave. I told her I thought it was a good idea and I was fine with it. She interviewed someone who was fine with the situation..but the mother decided to not hire the woman because she smoked twice a day. Alright. Well. I kept asking her if she interviewed anyone else..and she hadn't.
In October..at my 6 1/2 month mark...I work my birthday weekend so the parents can go away for their anniversary. I should also mention that I have had an easy pregnancy, and it never hindered my job. I was fully capable of doing everything I did before for the baby.
They go away Saturday night..come home Sunday afternoon and wanted to talk. I assumed they found a part time person. Wrong. I knew as soon as she said ' I just want you to know that I'm happy for you and your pregnancy' that they were firing me. I started crying immediately. Pregnancy emotions. Blah. They went on to tell me that they were worried about what to do during my maternity leave and couldn't find anyone to cover me..so they hired someone to replace me period. I asked them if they realized that I was 6 1/2 months pregnant and the odds of me finding a job were slim to none? They just said...well..we had to think of our daughter. How was replacing the only nanny she had ever had thinking of her? They daughter is very attached to me..and me to her. How was me being pregnant hindering her? I feel I am fully capable of continuing to care for her and my child. She'll be almost 2 at that point, and getting on the independent side anyway. They told me they wouldn't expect payment for my car for the month of November..but would expect a payment starting in December. They wanted me to work until the end of October.
I told them I had to leave. I collected my things and got out of there. I called my husband hysterical. I have no idea how I made it home. WELL...I didn't call her on Monday...I have no idea why she expected me to. I didn't want to go back to work for them..but knew we needed the money for the next 3 weeks. She called me and left me a voicemail Monday evening..saying she thought it would end nicer than what it was ending...and she guesses I wasn't coming in the next day. I called her back..saying I was coming in...and told her..I'm upset. You have to understand that. She couldn't understand why I was upset? Gee. I wonder. She basically was asking me if I was going to be cruel to her daughter..I was dumbstruck by this..NO...I would NEVER do anything to harm your child. It's not her fault her parents are selfish stuck up people.
She called me back about an hour later..saying she talked to her husband and they didn't feel I was in a 'good place' and felt that I wasn't capable of caring for their child. They were going to pay me for the next 3 weeks anyway. WELL..bless their hearts. They wanted me to come on Saturday to collect the pay. I dreaded the day.
I arrived on Saturday..and had to listen to them 'explain' themselves one more time..all while he basically dangled my check in front of me. They still couldn't understand why I would be upset. They talked about me coming on weekends to work for them...toward my car payment...but they went on to say that they basically needed to learn to trust me again. How did they not trust me? I'm still confused by this.
I collected my check..and left.
I'm still so angry over this whole situation, but sad too. I really miss their daughter. The while finding a new thing semi-worked out. I work 10 hours a week at macy's for a whopping 80 bucks a week.
We'll see how the next 2 years of car payments work out. At this point..I have no idea how we'll make the next 6 months. Bastards.