Received Friday, May 15, 2009
I have wanted to submit this since it happend. But I dont want my boss to get more mad because I talked about in public. I dont have a lot of friends where I nanny and those I do have are not nannies and don't get it.
This is my problem. I work for a family with 2 super kids. I do everything for them and it does not bother me at all. I get them up in the morning. I clean the bottles, feed them. Diapers are usually wet. No laundry gets done on the weekend. The weekends the kids do nothing but sit in front of Nickelodeon while mom is on the computer and dad is out golfing.
Of the two parents, Dad is much better. He will sometimes take the kids out but the Mom is just a super lazy mom. If a child bumps his head, she doesn't even respond to the crying if I am in the room. (I dont think she ever does but I cant say what she does or doesnt do when I am not home). I will wait, give her a few seconds to respond and go and comfort the child. The mom never looks at the drawings the children bring home from preschool. If she gets her hands on them, she puts them in the garbage. She never reads teachers notes. She never knows if a party or school event is coming up.
Recently there was a food drive and the kids were so excited about it. We talked about how wonderful it was to help other children and picked out some things from the family's huge pantry. Three cans each. They were so proud going to school. The mother knows so little and cares so little that everything gets by her. She does drop the kids off at preschool though. Last week on the food drive day, she came home after dropping the kids off and had two cans of green beans and a can of soup and said to me, "I dont know what Harry thinks he is doing, he can have lunch when he gets home" and she sets the cans on the counter real hard like she just made some executive decision. I said, "Uh, it's for the food drive" and she just looked at me like I WAS THE IDIOT and walked off. Part of my job is to run child related errands, so I did gun it over to the school and get the cans of food back to Harry. You never saw such a huge smile on the kid's face. I told the teacher somehow these came out of his backpack in the car. And Harry was standing right there looking at me. But he knew, even before I spoke, he knew why I was there. I don't know how the Mom found the sons cans but not the daughters. Harry was probably talking excitedly about it while she tuned him out.
Anyway, in short, by this one story (and I have no less than 300 more), I work for a terrible mother. I try not to judge and just do the best that I can for her. On Friday the kids came home with projects they made for her for Mother's day. They were cute. And that was that. Or so I thought. I had been getting attitude from the mother all week. Finally, I say to her, "I'm sorry, is something wrong, something feels off" and she says to me, "I really expected that you would have helped the children do something nice for me for mother's day. Emily used too". I explained to her that I had not thought of it and that the children were proud of their preschool projects and she rolls her eyes at me and walks out of the room.
(*Harry is not the child's real name. *Emily is not the real name of their last nanny, but that is who she was talking about.)
I was shocked that she could be so bitchy to me about not doing something for her for Mother's day. I was SPEECHLESS. The father was his same self. But is she missing a piece of her frontal lobe? If I made a Mother's day card for her, what would it say? If I bought one at the store for her from one of the children, I would need a lot of white out because there is a lot of care, attention and nurturing she is not providing.
Do I just let this go and go on with things? Yes, I could have helped them make her something, but WHY SHOULD I? If she brings this up again, I swear, despite how much I love those kiddos, I am going to tell her to her face what a cold, emotionless, waste of space she is. Or maybe I should tell her, maybe if you start TODAY behaving like a mother, I'll help the children make you something next year and then point her in the direction of parenting and Borders.
I am furious. But mostly, I am furious because she has the audacity to be furious with me! Has any nanny ever experienced anything like this????