Thursday, April 2, 2009
Ok.. not sure where to start.We have a nanny for 3 kids, 2 preschool (A and T), one toddler (M). She's been with us for over 2 years. Previous to her, her sister nannied for us for over a year, then went back to school. Their mom has become a part of our family as well...she loves our kids, treats them like grandkids. All and all it's been the best situation anyone could ask for. Until today. My oldest casually mentioned "When M doesn't walk to his bedroom to get his diaper changed, Nanny bonks him." So my husband and I start casually asking her what she meant. Trying not to be alarmed (which was hard for me..trust). Finally after having her demonstrate a few times and getting her to discuss it a bit more, it comes out that our nanny swoops M up, and bonks his head or legs into the wall of the hallway while walking down the hall. How hard?? Not sure. Is it a game??? Maybe..maybe not. Has he had bruises or scratches lately???? Yes, but what crazy toddler boy who is a daredevil DOESN'T have a bruise every now and then from jumping off a coffee table or body slamming into his sisters or whatever......I'm numb. I'm absolutely numb. I need to talk to the nanny about it...get her side of the story, but I don't even know what to say, how to start. Do I believe what she says? Why would my daughter make it up? I also want to ask my other pre-schooler seperately what she has seen or noticed...she is quiet and such a "follower" of her big sister that I need to talk with her away from her sister so she isn't distracted, right???
Until today, I have NEVER doubted that my kids had the best care ever. NEVER...and now I do. I feel like my world has been turned upside down because I don't want to believe this. I can't believe this....but my oldest made it pretty clear that she "bonks" his head. This is unacceptable right? Does anyone know of an explanation that would make this ok??? What else can I do?? I know that the consensus on here is no nanny cam without informing the nanny, but I don't understand how that will help...if I tell her I'm going to start watching her. And then I start thinking about if I do fire her how devastating this will be for the kids....I mean this is someone who has been with our family for as long as my kids can remember practically. I mean if I fire her and she disappears forever, what will my kids think and how will that affect them. It would be the same as a divorce, practically......what do I do??? No flames please. Thanks