Thursday

Stressed Nanny needs Wine Because of Whiny Twins

Received Thursday, January 8, 2009
Perspective & Opinion Hi, I take care of 21 month old twin boys pt about 16 hours. I've been with them for about a year, but lately I've been unhappy. I feel so stressed out. I find myself feeling desperate, and in need of a glass of wine after work. They're a great family, and have been nothing but nice to me. I don't know if I should quit especially in these times. I like the boys but lately they've been so bratty and don't seem happy with me. They easily cry, they're throwing a couple tantrums a day ranging from sharing toys to wanting to be carried or just eating crackers when they want to, they are picky eaters, and whine a lot. I know that can be typical behavior for their age, but I can't handle it. I don’t know what to do. Any advice would be helpful. Facts: I’m 22, a student, $11 per hour off the books, don’t drive, no chores, located in a major city.

97 comments:

nc said...

What has your response been when they have done this? Have you given them one warning, and then take them to time out the second time they do it? If you give in then they will just keep using that tactic to get what they want. You have to hold your ground, and not get mad about it. Hope this helps.

Who said...

Is there some reason you don't feel it's ok to just have the glass of wine after your workday?

I understand that yes, for some people there is a reason not to have a glass of wine, but you're of age, and people have been using wine and the like to relax after a hard day for thousands of years.

nycnanny said...

They sound like typical 21 month old babies to me? I am really not trying to be rude but maybe childcare( at least for toddlers) isn't a good line of work for you. Toddlers are challenging. There is nothing wrong with going home and having a glass of wine but if you are truly very stressed out then I would seriously reconsider being a nanny. It can be very hard and stressful. IMO.

lovesthegirls said...

Sounds like an age thing that will pass... also for the love of God.. ask to start driving the children to activities... maybe they are acting out becasue of toddler cabin fever? And have a glass of wine, unless for some medical reason (such as recovering from alchohol abuse) enjoy a glass of wine after work....

mom said...

These are normal toddlers. It will pass. If you feel any urge at any time to let yourself get out of control with them, then you need to quit. Otherwise, buck up and wait for this phase to pass. With my kids, phases seemed to last 6 moths at a time (like clockwork...it was almost uncanny.) We would have an easy 6 months and then a challenging 6 months...and it went on like that until they were about three years old...maybe a bit longer. I know it can be dizzying...especially with two of them instead of just one. Sometimes just one had me at wits end by the end of the day.
Enjoy that wine after work...unless, as the poster above said, you have a reason not to.

Mary said...

I agree with the poster that said maybe childcare isn't your line of wok. Or at least not this job. I'm a nanny as well and I know how frustrating and stressful it can be at time, especially when there are temper tantrums. However, I couldn't help but notice that you are a part time nanny for only 16 hrs... that's not much at all. If you are getting this stressed out over a part time job, I really just wonder if childcare is a good fit for you. Imagine if you had a job full time, 40-55 hours a week and it was like this. You would be miserable!

Is this your first nanny job? Either way, I suggest you either move on from child care altogether or you at least find a job more suitable for yourself.

DenverNanny said...

Where are you located? My most stressful jobs were always when I felt "taken advantage of" ...felt underpaid for as much as I was doing. Around here, twins under 3-4 are AT LEAST $15/hour. Just a thought...

NannyInCharge said...

16 hours a week really isn't much unless you are working say 2 8 hour days in a row. It's actually very normal to get frustrated with toddlers...they are testing you all day everyday! Even parents get frustrated or mad.

The important thing to do is set rules that they can understand and stick to them. Time out is a great solution for kids this age. If one or both of them are doing something naughty, give them one warning such as "Stop hitting your brother. If you do it again, you will go in time out." They will understand!

If they do it again, pick them up, very calmly, and put them in time out. This can even be just on the couch or on a step but don't put them next to each other. Let them sit there for one minute and don't interact with them. If they try to get up, put them back and start the minute over. This will work after a couple of days they will see you are serious. When the 1 minute is over, pick them up, have them say "sorry" or give kiss/hug and then send them off to play.

Yelling or getting overly mad never works with toddlers. Don't be afraid to have your glass of wine and just realize they are not even 2 and they are just seeing what they can get away with and also learning how to play and share. Sharing is often a hard concept for them to get when they are so young.

Also take them outside, take them to an activity, get them out of the house! Good luck.

lynn said...

I have 3 kids (my 3rd is 20 mos now). I contend and always have that from 18 mos to 2 1/2 is THE most difficult frustrating time with kids. LIke other's said, now is the time to start with some discipline like time outs and getting out of the house is also key. Nothing worse than being cooped up all day inside with kids this age.

MotherT. said...

So the family is driving you to drink? Is that it? Get a grip.
Seriously. Go work at McDonalds if you can't handle it.

fiona said...

what you need is a blunt during work. While the twins are napping, spark it up.

not a park slope nanny said...

I agree with the nanny that said that maybe this age group isn't your cup of tea. If you did better with them slightly younger, that may be better suited for you.

I'm curious also how long you've been a nanny?

cali mom said...

Find a new line of work and start going to AA meetings. Seriously, if taking care of a pair of toddler twins for 16 hours a week freaks you out so much you are using it as an excuse to overindulge on alcohol, you need to make some changes in your life.

ericsmom said...

I think the problem is simple. Too many hours. If your the mother its a different story. But your not so 16 hours is too much.

Tell them you need to cut down on your hours.

Just Saying said...

I hope the wine reference was just a pun, but if it wasn't, I would take it rather seriously like Cali mom did. Alcohol is not going to solve your problems. Is there anyone you can safely vent to about your job?
You need to take charge and stop letting them run your day (I know, easier said than done). Try to set up a routine and to have some special goal every day. Can you take them to the library or the museum? Be creative, distraction works wonders at this age.

Amy Wine-house said...

good lord, if you can't have a glass of wine to unwind after a particularly stressful day...then what in the hell is wine for? I don't OP is getting drunk.

The tight arses have a point though - your job shouldn't make you so unhappy. Maybe you need older charges?

ha ha ha, a blunt. Its medicinal!!

Em said...

I have to say, a lot of good advice on here.
The kids are bored. Doesn't anybody take the kids outside?
They are toddlers, and this is what toddlers do, they whine, unless of course you are a great nanny who knows how to deal with that.

I can't say that I'm frustrated on my job, because my charges are toddlers, and I am way older than them and I get paid to guide them, and I do just that.

Kids can sense weakness and they prey upon it. They'd run this world if we didn't stop them. I mean seriously one of mine, looks at me sometimes, like, are you talking to me? lol, and these are still baby toddlers as I like to call them, but they don't mess around because I don't let them it's as simple as that.

Op I wonder how the support of the parents are. Do they support you in your disciplinary measures, because that can make or break whatever it is you need to accomplish.
My first conversation is always with the parents. They have no doubt about what and how I guide them, and I advise them to do the same. It makes my job easier, but even if parents do not follow suit. I am still in charge when I am ,and therefore still in control.

I have no clue about alcohol since I don't drink, and frankly don't understand why people drink when it may impair their judgment, but I didn't think a glass of wine would hurt if you wanted, but if this is 'driving' you to drink, then it sounds a little more serious- you know the fact that you have to ask if you should.

If these toddlers are driving you so crazy, I suggest like others have said that this is perhaps not the line of work for you,
No matter how 'bad' kids may seem, they still precious little people, who are doing only what is innate to them. They really deserve someone who can give them proper guidance especially at this age, or else they will be one of those kids I read about throwing tantrums in public.

Listen to the timeout advice, and make it adaptable to your situation. All nannies use different techniques, and frankly what works for the geese doesn't work for the gander.
I don't use one method on every job, because I really have to assess each child individually.

By the way, I'd rather you drink after work (take my alcohol advice very loosely), or leave the job than to stay frustrated and possibly harm a child

jojo bear said...

You're making $11 an hour OFF the books. Screw you and your anti American greed.

You don't sound like a particularly gifted nanny.

A real nanny is an American who works on the books and pays taxes. You're just one of the schmos we see in other threads struggling with or whacking her kids in the head.

Go online and get yourself a job at McDonalds, Burger King or Home Depot. The shifts are nice, tight 8 hour bundles with breaks every 2 hours.

Pay your taxes, then ask me to give a rat's ass about you and your plight.

beyotch's y'all said...

jojo bear, your bitchery never fails to amuse and disgust.

mom said...

Am as unhappy as anybody when somebody doesn't pay taxes...but does a sometimes babysitter have to pay taxes...if she earns overall during the year under a certain amount? Just asking...I really don't know.

cali mom said...

Um, Em, could you try to be just a little bit more smug, snotty, self congratulatory, and entitled? You're only hitting the 99th percentile so far.

scma said...

The youngest of my four charges is now 23 months. He just got out of that stage. He acts so much better now that he can talk in 3-4 word sentences and tell me what he wants. Maybe if you stick it out for a few months it will get better. I know it must be difficult with two at that age.

MissDeeIsFreakedOut said...

Toddlers are a challenge. At this age, they are developing many skills, such as independence, which is the reason why they act they way they do. You work 16 hours per week and are stressed out? You want stress honey? I have had stress. If you can't handle this age group, put in your resignation.

not a park slope nanny said...

Ericsmom
Please tell me you are joking?! LMAO!! 16 is too few hours? You really can't work less than that unless you do a drive-by!! Haha!

mom said...

Miss deels has a good point. You'll definitely want to quit before they turn twelve and a half! And 14-15...you may as well just off yourself now.

Manhattan nanny said...

I recommend as much structured activity as possible. Get outside regardless of the weather. Bundle up to play in the snow, and if it is raining put on slickers and boots and jump in puddles.
Set up and art project every day, (at this age, collages, stickers, finger paint, playdough), and bring books from the library even if they have a lot at home. Plan activities ahead of time, and when they get jiggy, change activities.
Tantrums should be dealt with immediately, with a time out, not a punishment, but a chance to calm down. Do NOT talk to, try to reason with, or in any way give the child an audience until they calm down. They will learn that is not the way to get attention.
If you are only having one glass of wine, relax and enjoy it!

NannyInCharge said...

Cali Mom - Since when is having a glass of wine after work over indulging on alcohol? Loosen up!

Em said...

Um Calimom, who dragged you in here.
Must the dregs follow me around?

Anonymous said...

Hi, I am the original poster. First off,I'm not drinking on the job. Who does that?Second,I take the kids out to the library every day, we go to indoor playground twice a week, and sometimes we'll go to a museum. We do the time out technique, it seems to only work with one child. I would never hit a child. The other child just breaks out screaming, throwing himself even if I just say no to something small, and yes I keep doing it until he understands. Their mother feels the same way I do. We don't understand why one of the boys is completely flipping out for any small thing. The twins are just so angry and bratty and we don't know what to do. Thank you for your comments.

cali mom said...

NannyInCharge, one glass of wine that you are "desparate" for and "need", is one glass for the wrong reasons.There's nothing at all wrong with a glass of wine except if you simply cannot LIVE without it.

Em, yes they will honey because this is a public forum. If you say something smug, snotty and stupid, you may get a responding opinion whether you want one or not. Deal.

Relax said...

Dear god, enjoy them while they're little. Once they go to school, kids turn into little heathens. "Well, Joey has a scooter, why can't I?", "You're not my mother!", and "Talk to the hand" are just a few of the things my five year old tells me. It only gets harder as they get older. I also have three year old twins, and I'd kill to have them be 21 months old again.

mom said...

OP,
This sounds very normal to me. And I have seen too many children who behave the way the one twin you describe behaves, within a family of other very well behaved children, whose parents are at wits end after having employed every conceivable child rearing strategy on the books with no success. Good, consistent parenting/nannying does not always guarantee a complacent, well behaved child. There are truly just some children who are difficult to control, no matter what. I was thinking about that when so mnay people started writing to you suggesting varous forms of discipline...that maybe he is just one of those more difficult to deal with children. If you haven't seen a few of them in your lifetime (and witnessed that the parents are truly good, consistent parents), I can see that it might be hard to believe that you can't find SOME method of discipline to correct bad behavior...but it does happen. Don't feel bad about your nannying skills.
Now the best you can all hope is that there is not something fundamentally wrong with the child. He may have some form of Autism, or another difficulty that will make all of this behavior explainable somewhere down the road. Poor little guy. I hope not.

I have one friend in particular with this situation with a pair of twins. They are excellent parents in every way. Two of their children are exceptionally well behaved and thriving in their schools. The older child is in early elementary school and the twins are about kindergarten age. One of the twins is very well behaved, excelling at all milestones and showing a lot of early promise academically. The other twin has been invited to leave three preschools thus far because of his uncontrollable behavior and will likely not be ready to start kindergarten in the same year as the other twin...nor will he be accepted to the competitive private school that the other twin has been accepted at. Looking back, his diffiuclty started as an infant...but you don't really think anything is too amiss at that point because you just think some infants are a little more demanding, or must have a sore tummy, or whatever.

If I were you I might suggest she ask her pediatrician about this problem to see if he has any ideas about what might be bothering him. I would stay shy of suggesting you think something is wrong with him, because that is a painful thing for a mom and she just migh resent the messenger...even if she rationally realizes it is not your fault. But the doctor will evaluate him(hopefully he is on the ball) and will hopefully suggest any testing he thinks might be appropriate to get tot he bottom of this. What would be the most sad is if this child lives his childhood with himself and everybody else just thinking he is a bad boy, and possibly missing some valuable stages where treatment could work wonders, when a trip to the doctor could set the wheels in motion to put him back on the right track.

He will soon be old enough to percieve what other people think of him...and he will use that information to judge his own worth and goodness. His behavior needs addressed before that impression becomes a bad one.

Good luck nanny!

Austin Nanny said...

mom, to answer your question. My brother is a CPA. I work part time and he told me I don't have to report if it's under $4000 a year. There is a box to report babysitting income. I reported mine anyway, and the IRS corrected my return and didn't even accept it as part of my income, instead only taxing cash reported on my W2 from another job.

And I can't remember the exact number, but I think that until you make $10K, it's all refunded back to you anyway.

But let's have some compassion. We didn't all spring forth from the earth as fantastic and wondrous caregivers. I had to learn how to deal with toddlers. We could just help her instead of attacking a young girl with no experience. OP--when my charges were that age, I would devise "treasure hunts" I would hide treats outside in various places and have them race from place to place getting their treats. THey loved it and would happily keep at it until they were falling over from exhaustion.

anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
10:29AM re-post said...

RE-POST FOR ANONYMOUS:

anonymous said...

Sounds like you are feeling like a mother at the end of a stressful day, but unlike a mother, if you are truly no longer happy with your situation you can leave or take your vacation time very soon.

10:29 AM

RE-POST FOR ANONYMOUS

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
12:18PM re-post for Anonymous said...

RE-POST FOR ANOTHER ANONYMOUS POSTER
(Can't anyone see that the ANONYMOUS posts get re-posted?)
You need a MONIKER people, please!!)

Anonymous said...

Your employer should be paying you regular, legit salary if you earn at least $1,600 in 2008, or $1,700 in 2009. That assumes that you work in her home. By being legal, you can get credit for your tuition and maybe an Earned Income Credit (if you are very low income) when your file your tax return. You may get more money back after filing your taxes than you had withheld for federal taxes and social security.

If you are self-employed, or "independent", you must pay social security tax on all profit over $400. THIS SELF-EMPLOYED SOCIAL SECURITY IS CALCULATED AT TWICE THE REGULAR AMOUNT, BECAUSE YOU DON'T HAVE AN EMPLOYER TO MATCH IT. So you claim your full income on your tax return, with self-employment going on Schedule C. Then you take relevant expenses on that same Schedule C (continuing educ, subscriptions, legal/tax advice you paid for during the year). Commuting to work is not deductible. Your profit, assuming it's over $400, is taxed for social security. You don't have to pay regular federal tax on your first $9,000 or so. You are still eligible for tuition credit, and the Earned Income Credit if your total income is very low.

You can call the IRS at 1-800-829-1040 or 800-876-1715. If you have any difficulty, try the federal Taxpayer Advocate at 1-877-777-4778.

12:18 PM

ericsmom said...

Huh??? Park Slope?

I said working 16 hours a day is too much...

ericsmom said...

opps I read it wrong. I thought she was working 16 hours a day!!! I was wondering why no one agreed 16 hours a day was too much for one person. LOL

NannyInCharge said...

cali mom - I'm sorry, where in her post did she say she could simply not live without a glass of wine? She said she feels desperate AND she needed ONE glass of wine.

Stop nitpicking on people. People have been drinking wine for thousands of years and I'm sure we can all agree it's okay in moderation.

mom said...

eric's mom,
I'm sure you'll agree that as a mom there are many days when you would be thrilled to work ONLY 16 hours! That would mean a whole 8 hours to sleep! I miss those itty bitty days...all except the sleep deprivation!
Although now my oldest has his mind bent on buying a motorcycle for his primary mode of transportation. GAK! And he's too old for me to tell "no." So that lack of sleep phase of parenting is suddenly starting to look pretty good in hindsight I must admit. At least I had total control then. #&%^*&^!!!!!

Em is my hero said...

NannyInCharge
Don't waste your breath.Nit-picking is what she does. You on the other hand seem insightful. Nice to have you around!

Twinmom said...

Nanny in Charge and Em is my hero and the rest---amen to you all--Why is cali mom such a rag? Go find another blog...yuck..

NYCMom said...

First of all, don't listen to the trolls on this board. There are so many these days that I wonder why I still come here.

Second, 16 hours is A LOT if you are also a student. I worked 10 hours a week while in college and found it very hard to maintain good grades, my job and a social life. One always suffers. You have every right to be stressed out.

Third, I have one 2yo son who has really become challenging lately. I cannot IMAGINE having 2 of him. Toddler boys also reinforce each other and bad behavior can snowball. This definitely is a phase that can pass. I would ask the mother what her discipline tactics are, how you can help in terms of creating a fun environment while keeping them safe and healthy. A lot of people utilize the methods of 1,2,3 Magic, What to Expect in the Toddler Years, Supernanny or some other parenting book. Using methods such as "time outs" really helps curb bad behaviors at this age. Also, I found that my son exhibits bad behavior when he is bored (like some of the posters said). When I give him direction and tell him what to do (please throw this away, lets clean up toys, help mommy make the bed, lets put this train together) he is happier and less likely to say...climb the bookcase. So try to plan little activities for the boys to help pass the time. Also, you probably used to be able to get school work done during the babysitting time. You cannot do that now b/c they need your full attention. Younger or older (say 5yos) will let you do homework and play on their own, but this age is really bad for that. Something to think about if it's an issue.

Good luck!

NannyInCharge said...

Em, Twinmom -

Thank you! I have been a long time lurker...for over a year now and used to post occasionally when anon was common but have recently started reading more and have been compelled to post! :) This site is just too crazy and addicting.

cali mom said...

NannyInCharge, OP is clearly concerned about "needing" (her word) a glass of wine at the end of her day. That's why she posted here asking for advice. |whoosh!|

Mimi said...

Could "whoosh" mean the sound of your exit door??

nurse rachet said...

Ha! Calimom ain't going nowhere. She's part of the charm around here.

Love ya calimom! you rock, babe!

mom said...

I hafta say that I LOVE Calimom too..and she definitely adds some spice and a lot of charm to this whole site.
Plus, she's not one to be scared off by a couple of dissenting opinions. She says what she has to say and sticks behind it.
Don't worry people, Calimom is one tough lady and she'll stick it out. Heck, this is nothing compared to the flamers of "olden days" on this site!

cali mom said...

"Whoosh" refers to the fact that the entire point of this posting whizzed straight over NannyInCharge's head. Maybe she didn't understand the header?

K said...

MOM,I am surprised that you are such a fan of someone who continually rags on people?
You are about as fair and objective as it gets on this blog and I have no doubt that your character here reflcts who you are in real life,but I truly think you are for somereason,blinded when it comes to Calimom's true nature.
Perhaps out of respect for a long-time,regular poster?
There is a difference between constructive critisism and just plain ragging on other posters.Calimom is often,just rude and has antogonized several flame wars as of late.
Has her continued cat-fights and name calling with more and more posters everyweek,truly gone un-noticed by so many or truly as welcomed as many of lead us to believe?
I have witnessed several old anons try to clean up their acts to keep this board running at an adult level with some sense of maturity..afew have left..a few have cleaned it up but she has not changed at all and continues to follow around those she has had a previous beef,current beef with or anyone else she simply does not agree with only to start a bunch of crap on an otherwise interesting blog.
MOM,I adore you and respect you.

If you met someone at a party who acted this way I doubt that those of you who "love her" would bring her home where she might end up influencing your children or becoming a part of your lives..
Especially any of you with impressionable teenage daughters.
This is the exact behavior that many of us try to discourage in our homes.

I know this is just a blog and not real life but after a while,everbody's true colors will and do show through.

I guess this is where the term"loving someone from afar" comes in?

not a park slope nanny said...

K
I can't speak for Mom, but I know the reason for being a fan of cali mom's is exactly that: respect for an old regular. That's not to say I condone a lot of what she says and does, but when most people are only dropping by, she will still be here tomorrow. She's been around a long time, as have I. Before when there weren't that many people on this blog, when it was in it's infancy. Before when there weren't many people using a moniker. Everyone was "anonymous". She's made herself a real colorful character with her commentary. So, that's why I like cali mom.

K said...

Not a Park Slope Nanny,I appreciate the input. I also respectfully disagree with the way respect is doled out but maybe that is just old fashioned,on my part.

The respect that I have for MOM,MPP,Chick,and a few others comes with their ability to be objective and fair and even when they are antogonized,they show class.
The same applies for many others so pls forgive any ommissions.You know who are are.

So,if respect is simply handed out to those who have been around for ages that would explain a lot and answers my question.

Again,thanks for the info.

not a park slope nanny said...

K
I can totally dig it. And your thinking isn't old fashioned, because that's the way your supposed to earn respect. Like I said, I don't always agree with her, but there have been times where she was right on the money in her comments.
But it's hard to look the other way when there's history and loyalty there. So many have come and gone, and you can't blame all of their absences on cali mom. That wouldn't be fair. And like you, I have my favs, Mom being one of them. I must say she is one of the most level-headed posters on here, lol.

NannyInCharge said...

So as far as the header of a post goes, I'm guessing Jane or whoever makes it up, and not the OP?

I think most people can pretty easily see that the "entire point of this posting" was how to deal with whiny twins. Her needing a drink after work was just a simple comment and definitely not the whole point of this post.

Why do some people take nothing and make it into something so ridiculously big? This site is great but I'm glad there are other blogs and threads out there where everyone isn't so argumentative! :)

cali mom said...

Well Nannyincharge, it's funny you'd complain about "everyone" being argumentative when it was YOU who toook great issue with my one and only post on this thread. Now that I have answered you, I guess you are a victim of "everyone" being argumentative?

And K, you're entitled to your opinions. They actually don't matter to me in the slightest. But I'm amused at how annoyed you are that nobdy is jumping on your bandwagon here. Better luck next time.

K said...

Calimom
No doubt my opinions do not matter to you. Nobody's do except those who praise you. Surprise,surprise!

As far as a bandwagon,there is none. Simply my personal feelings towards one poster on this blog,however after reading the posts from the past few weeks,I see that I am not the only one who feels the way I do. That in itself says enough for me.
Best to you and congrats on your following.

cali mom said...

K, the opinions of people whom I know and/or respect do matter to me. You are neither.

mom said...

Hey everyone,
Had a really rough weekend, so just getting a quick peek before going off to bed. Thanks for all of the nice comments. It's a nice surprise after a loooooong weekend.

And I see that a lot of the "long term regulars" have answered the same way I would have about Calimom had I been here to participate in the discussion.

Actually Cali, I believe flamed me when I first came on the site (I seem to remember somebody telling me to get off the library computer and go home to my trailer...remember that Cali...hehehe? I think she was my first flame...and I was totally surprised because I didn't even know people did that. I gues you always kinda love your "first" eh?) ...and probably I did the same back to her.
But as I watched the board (this is the first...and still actually only, site I have blogged on, I have seen a lot happen. Cali may say things bluntly, that's for sure, but she's often quite funny and usually pretty insightful in her comments...even though we are as often on the opposite side of an argument as we are of the same opinion.
And when I see Calimoms name at the top of a post, I know it's going to be interesting...so she's become one of my true favorites.

Maybe it also stems from the fact that I've seen her hold her own against some pretty relentless flamers over quite a long time. She's just very quick witted.

Believe it or not, mom can toss a few flames herself (I have...or, I like ot think, HAD a tendency to strike back pretty ferociously when I felt attacked) but I have tried in recent months to be a kinder, gentler "mom"...because one of the things I try to remember most in life is that character is measured not by what we do when we're seen, but by what we do when we know nobody's watching (which, I quickly realized, we feel nobody really is when we are anonymous on the web.) And, actually, one of the posters I really used to not like at all is now another of my favorites. But as for Cali, I'v enjoyed her, even when she flamed me at first...because I recall her comments as being clever...and a sharp wit always amuses me and is appreciated...even when its directed at me.

Hope that all makes sense. Love to Y'all!

K said...

calimom,since the feeling is mutual..all is good then.Atleast we both agree on something!

bitch is the new black said...

Cali mom is a bitch and I dig her. I dig all the bitches on this site, even Queen Beyotch jojo.

cali mom said...

Mom, I did flame you when you first came on but I'm really sure I never said anything about trailers or library computers. Anyway, for previous flames at you, I *am* sorry, and I'm glad we can now agree to disagree when necessary.

cali mom said...

"Bitch is the new black", heehee! I like that.

not a park slope nanny said...

I was lucky, I somehow managed to stay off of Cali mom's radar because she never flamed me.
I kind of feel like I missed some right of passage! lol

cali mom said...

Maybe you are just very sensible and intelligent, not a park slope nanny :)

not a park slope nanny said...

Ha! thanks Cali mom! ;)
But I think it's more that I usually tend to fly under the radar and I try not to piss people off. I've had my fair share from others in the past, though... just because they had an opposing opinion or something.

cichita banana said...

I'd rather read a bitchy post than a boring-ass know-it-all one. This is directed to no one in particular.

mom said...

hey calimom,
No apology necessary. As I said, clever writing is always so fun for me to read. I appreciate your style and wit. (And don't forget that rockin' ass...hehehe!) And how could I tell others to buck up if I'm not willing to do it myself?
I think most of what's on here is in good fun...and lot more tongue in cheek most times than it is possible to properly convery on a computer!

Em said...

This is as funny as it gets people.
Makes me seriously question some people's character.
You're spot on 'K' and Nanny in Charge!

cali mom said...

Come to think of it, didn't "amanda" also claim to be a nanny and continually procliam herself to be all-knowledgeable in everything? Hmm.

ROFLMAO, Em is "seriously questioning" people's characters. Are we supposed to be insulted or amused? Frankly, I'd be embarassed if someone like Em actually *admired* me.

K said...

CALIMOM
WOW,well someone is full of themselves.!! Jeesh..how big does that melon of yours get? I really would not worry yourself with embarrassment about all the people that you "think" MIGHT admire you?? Good greif charlie brown get a grip..it's an anonymous blog with what?? 10-15 regular posters..don't think you have to go incognito yet!
LMAO at your confidence level.Holy shit are you smug!Your head must seriously take up all the damn space when you walk into a room!!
Go have a beer,take a bath,eat a Twinkie,whatever you need to do to come down to reality because I assure you,you don't have to worry that every damn poster on here admires you. I am pretty sure the two or three that do have already spoken up!So, you can relax now,K?
seriously!!

by the freaking way who the hell is "Amanda"? and why are you implying that she is here?
Every f'ing time someone shows dislike for you you go off on this
"it's all the same person with a new moniker crap" Get a new line would ya,it's getting old as shit!!
Guess what,we are not all the same person.
We just don't like you as much as YOU like you!!
Self centered just a little huh????

cali mom said...

Well well well K and all your other names,..interesting that you managed to confirm that you DO change your moniker more often than your underwear while trying so furiously to deny it. Thanks for the smile.

And since you have shown previously that you are challenged, I won't laugh at you too hard when I point out to you that *I* actually have NOT (until now) accused you and all your other monikers of being one person. But you sure did take the bait.

cali mom said...

**chuckle**

 K said...

CALIMOM
WOW,well someone is full of themselves.!! Jeesh..how big does that melon of yours get? I really would not worry yourself with embarrassment about all the people that you "think" MIGHT admire you?? Good greif charlie brown get a grip..it's an anonymous blog with what?? 10-15 regular posters..don't think you have to go incognito yet!

--------

 Em said...

OH, THIS IS ALL SO COMICAL oops.
Sorry about that.

This is quite comical, and guess what folks I love 'Em's my new Hero!' lol.

It's about time somebody else shook things up around here.
Who cares who wants to use different monikers, seriously, the things that bother you people amazes me.
Let it be known from henceforth that anybody can use any moniker they like, and they can change it daily.
Got that people?? I hope so, because no one cares about this lame non problem
It's hardly something to fuss about people

K said...

Hey Calimom,Kiss my A ess-ess!

I am not nor have I ever been EM!!

Ya shoulda listened and had the beer or the twinkie.
You are so full of yourself!And this is just gonna kill ya but,you are WRONG!!
You could not find your ass with both hands and a flashlight!!
You are the most pompous female I have ever come across!
Bait? AAHH yeah..that might apply if I was actually Em or one of the many others that you accuse me of being.
I do however find EM fabulous and don't mind at all being accussed of being her..though as I like her,I confess,I am not her!

I think you know what you can do with your bait! Hook & All!
Lady ( and I use the term very loosley) you are delusional with a capital f-ing D!
You just made a huge a@@ of yourself. Keep it up and I won't have to work so hard to show everyone what a real nutjob,know it all you are. You are doing just fine on your own!
Now,go get some sleep honey..you need to replenish some cells cause you is**dubulu-are-oh-en-gee** WRONG girlfriend!!
Take a hike Calimom,it might relax you.Oh and "don't let the door hit ya where the Good Lord split ya!"
Toodles Poodles!

K said...

BTW,whats with the exerp re-post??? We all saw it the first time a round when I posted it. Were you trying to make a point and somehow got side-tracked?
Just wondering?

NannyInCharge said...

Maybe you guys can all continue this entertaining banter on a newer post. I am getting tired of scrolling down so far to find it!

cali mom said...

K et al, hope you feel better now. But I somehow doubt it, LOL! Good thing your employers pay for your medical insurance, but does that cover psychiatric help?

K said...

calimom,you go right ahead sweetheart and change the subject! Fact is..you f'ed up with your know it all proclomation that I am EM. No amount of insults can change that fact! You might successfully distract everyone else but it won't work with me. Flinging insults and all,you are still a sorry,smug little know it all who lacks enough self esteem that you are simply unable to admit it when you might be(in this case ARE) wrong.
What a horrible way to go through life! I feel sorry for you.Truly!
Atleast when I am wrong or just a bitch,I admit it!
Your true colors are flying high today toots!
So,you tell yourself whatever you need to in order to make yourself the victor in this one. As you always do.I am moving on to another thread cuz you are a complete waste of my time!

PS..just in case you missed it,I am not EM dumba@@!

cali mom said...

**wiping your angry spittle from my computer screen**

Yes dear, of course you are not anyone but "K". After all, you said so, therefore we all know it's not a lie. See you next time around, (no matter what you call yourself). Just funny how the moniker "K" never appeared on this board before a few days ago yet you are referencing things which supposedly went on months ago.

Now go back to spanking your charges, that shuld help you relax like it always does.

cali mom said...

should

K said...

calimom,I have never spanked a charge.Unless you have some sort of proof for that outright lie and accusation you need to shut the hell up!
Get bent on someone elses time!
Facts are still facts and you still have yet to admit you are wrong! Just can't bring yourself to do it can you?? SAD!!

anon regular said...

Cali mom
I can tell by your last sentence that you think you know who "K" is (and I'm quite positive it isn't Em) but there's someone else who has been lurking for awhile now and it looks as if she has just joined the party as of late.
Is this who you think it is?
(And yes, I know we're not allowed to name names!)

K said...

ya know,just for the record,you guys are silly!
This is the same 10th grade stuff that drives people to flame wars or to just up and lv. No different that the childish exchange between calimom & me and Calimom and several other posters over the last few months.
Accussing but not accussing??

I am not EM.
I am not Butt look Big.

We all know who calimom follows around antogonozing and fighting with on this blog,so why act like it's a big secret and you two are the only ones who seem to know who you are implicating? We are all reading the same blog for crying outloud!

Em has stated she is not K.
Butt looks big is attending a family matter according to a post a few weeks back and I have not seen a post from her in ages.

I have however witnessed several angry exchanges in the last few months between calimom and many,many posters.All who calimom claims to be one in the same!

Why is it so hard to accept that there are more than 2 posters who really don't like Calimom?
She has fought with several posters over the past few months and rides them just as she has me over the last two days. I have not been fighting with myself ya know. It takes two.

Not everyone thinks she is the cats meow ladies and she gives as good as she gets,though she 9 out of 10 times gives it first,so why act so surprised that yet,another poster has had it with her?

And for the record unless you are Jane or MPP you don't know who is lurking around or who is posting,so good try but that is just a lame statement!
anon reg,why not stand behind your statements instead of cowering behind an unknown moniker when implicating other posters? That is just chicken sh!T!

cali mom said...

K, I'm sorry that you feel so slighted by me (not really) and if you want to hate me until you're purple, go right ahead. Funny indeed that you are even angrier at me than "Em" for me saying that you and she sound much alike and both have serious issues. If you *say* you are not the same person, fine by me. You can say it all you want-I don't have to believe it just because you say it. And that makes you angrier and angrier. So go ahead and have that heart attack now, that'll sure teach ME a lesson, LOL! But I thought you said you were done answering in this thread?

Anon regular, I think I know who you mean, though I don't remember if it ever had a real moniker. Maybe that's not who you had in mind. I'll have to ponder this a while.

cali mom said...

LOL, "K" is actually trying to chastise someone for not using a consistent moniker?! K is for Kettle, of course.

K said...

calimom,as far as me beind done with this thread,I too thought I was but your continued outrageous accussations make it very hard for someone to leave.
Spanking? Really..please do tell how you came to that conclusion. Cuz surely you would never just make shit up out of anger,right?
Admitting you are wrong about me being Em? Nope not yet.
You need to re adjust and screw your head on right!
A few things you need to know:
No mystery.......
You know who I am. I am K

I do not spank my charges and you need to(but never will) apologise for such a gross mis-statement.

You also need to apologise to EM for implicating her.She does not deserve such negative attention from either of us.

You are so bent on "you being right and me being wrong" that you are now making shit up to try and convince yourself that I am the bad guy here and you are just defending yourself.
actually,I think the K would better stand for "kiss my a@@" when conversing with you! But hey if kettle suits you,so be it!
Its a good thing my initials were not FB.damn!!

EM,I am sorry that you have been dragged into this.I hope Calimom will smarten up and get it through her THICK ass skull that we are not nor have we ever been one in the same person/poster.
As she says" she does not have to believe it just because I say it" or because you have said it or because anon reg has said"I am quite positive it isn't EM" Becuase yes,all three of us are liers and she is the only oster on this blog who knows anything!
Anyhow,I am sorry.
There,
Now I am done. I think you,calimom,will do and have done,just fine making a fool of yourself with your babble about who is who.
Toodles poodles!

anon regular said...

Speaking of Butt Looks Big... has anyone heard from HER lately???? I miss HER so much!!! SHE really was a firecracker!!!

To spank or not to spank said...

Cali mom
This was one of my favorite threads of all time. If you have the time, maybe you should read it again. It's very telling!

K said...

calimom.ok you posted it,now explain why?

K said...

calimom I stand corrected. Looks like someone else posted this mysterious thread. Would love to know why it is so telling? Can the poster elaborate please?

Cali mom fan club said...

"k" is for kettle, LMAO!! Hahaha!

Sydney White said...

Well, I don't know if Butt Looks Big is around or not, but if she can see this:

We miss you, girlfriend!

NannyInCharge said...

This stuff is hilarious!

In my opinion, K and Em are not the same person at all.

K never puts a space after her punctuation (especially commas) and Em does. Just putting in my two cents!

mom said...

We miss BLB.

BLB, You and your son have been in my prayers.

Beezle said...

Ummm, it really sounds like you're unfit for this type of work. Everything you described seems "par for the course" as far as 21 mos. olds go. I know that the twin cliche "double the trouble" applies here as well, but if it's your job to care for these kids, you should understand that it isn't going to be a cake-walk. Childcare is an all consuming gig. If you feel that you cannot cope, then you probably can't. On a lighter note, consider that this may just be a phase that the boys are going through. It's been my experience that a child's temperment can change entirely on a bi-monthly basis.



And only a couple of tantrums a day? I'd say that's pretty good for that age!

Iris said...

They sound like brats to me. The problem is, you can't change them unless the parents are willing to work with you. Just like Supernanny.

You need to sit down and talk to the parents about the need for consequences and rule enforcement.

If you all cannot commit to a specific set of guidelines, it will be an uphill battle to change those kids.

By the way, they are NOT to young to be well-behaved. It's that kind of thinking that made them this way.