Neglectful nanny sighted: Sparrow Park - South End Boston, MA. 1:30 pm. - 3:00pm. Medium height hispanic nanny mid 20's (spanish speaking), long brown hair in pony tail. She was at the park twice today. Beige pants and pink stripe shirt.The two girls (white) she was (NOT) watching ages 5 and 7 ish ? maybe 4 and 6 ? Straight beachy sandy blonde hair, shoulder length. The nanny was on her phone for over an hour - she was wandering around without watching the kids on the other side of the park (over 300/400 ft.). The children picked through the garbage, played with broken items from the trash, pretended the items were guns (making the sound effects). The children had no supervision and everyone at the park - oodles of other nannies and parents were all concerned .... I hope the parent(s) of these childen make some major changes.
14 comments:
wowza!! I usually try to find a reason why the "bad nanny" isn't so bad afterall but this case sounds bad! Playing with broken objects from the trash??
I'm with you on the picking through garbage, not paying attention, letting the little ones wander too far . . . but you lost me when you complained that children were (gasp!) pretending that objects were guns and (double gasp!) making sound effects during imaginative play!
Newsflash: kids like to pretend to with pretend guns. Some kids will fashion ANY object into a play weapon. This does NOT make them violent kids or prone to violence in real life. It provides a harmless outlet and is absolutely age-appropriate.
wonkettegirl,
True enough. many moons ago I decided not to buy my kids toy guns. They made lego guns, stick guns...guns out of anything they could point at somebody and yell "bang." I gave up my idealistic lunacy the day my son chewed his peanut butter sandwich into the shape of a gun and "shot" his brother at the table during lunch.
You girls do make a good point on the gun thing, boys will develop anything into guns, my charges are both boys and they were using hairbrushes as guns. lol
I wouldn't let my kids or charge PRETEND play with guns. That just seems like a given. With me, guns, even fake ones, should always be off limits. I wouldn't introduce them as harmless play toys when they're so obviously NOT. Even if you're pro-gun, you can't deny the fact that it's not a toy and it's not something to be glorified. Not this day and age. Guns are off limits. I would want my children to know that and to even fear them. I feel very strongly about this.
They can pretend they're animals and teachers, not cowboys and robbers. Welcome to 2008 and its growing problems.
Mom, the story about your son made me laugh out loud. I nannied for a family recently that had a 4 year old who was obsessed with hunting and guns (the Dad was an avid hunter). However, it was always a BIG no-no to "shoot" at anything besides birds, squirrels, etc. I felt like because of his appreciation and fondness for guns, he was as respectful and wary of them just as someone who has been taught that guns are forbidden. He also knew that toy guns and talk of "shooting" anything were only ok for play at home and nowhere else. I think it all depends on how the parents treat the situation, and I believe his parents treated it pretty well.
The gun game is a tough question. At my son's school, there is a rule against "shooting" games, and I tend to agree with JJ. Basically, when it has come up, I've just explained (or reminded him) that guns can kill people, and he knows what "dead" means. So my point with those kids is that guns are not something to joke about and play about, without at least understanding clearly that they ARE playing at hurting people and making them dead. Of course, they immediately turn it into a game of spraying with a fire hose, or using some sort of "force" from their magic finger like a superhere, etc.
I meant superhero.
oh for the love of benji. Guns are ONLY bad if they are used in a BAD way.
I don't see why IMAGINATIVE play is wrong. Clearly you can tell your children not to play with real guns.
Guns are also used for protection
cops have guns, try explaining to your child after you said they were bad why mr.police officer has one.
Your child who is pretending to play with guns is doing what children do. THEY ARE PRETENDING.
as long as parents don't give the kid a real one and tell them all the BAD AND GOOD things about them, they'll be okay.
Guns are glorified. To argue that guns are only bad if they're used in a bad way is a bit ridiculous and naive. Cops use guns. Cops are trained to use guns. Cops are trained to protect people so they don't have to use guns. I understand that sometimes only sounds good on paper, but to use the fact that cops use gun as part of your rationale to defend the fact they're harmless is far-fetched.
It's up to a parent first and foremost to educate their children and teach their children from a very young age what is right and what is wrong. Establish a moral basis and hopefully your kids will be more influenced by what you have taught them as opposed to what they see every single day, on TV, in the news and sometimes in their neighborhoods. However, that doesn't take away from the fact that children will ALWAYS be influenced by outside variables and that guns are huge issue in this country (especially in comparison to a lot of our fellow "free worlders"). We're not living in the early part of the century when kids played cops and robbers and pretended they were cowboys. Guns were not the problem then that they are now. You have to adapt to a changing society and its problems. Pretend gun play is no longer an issue of a VIVID imagination. If they are uninfluenced and are not introduced to guns, they will find other games to play and other outlets for their imagination. It seems foolish to teach kids that guns are ok. You're not stunting their emotional growth by banning guns. Trust me. They'll find something else to play.
Jerseyxjacqui,
You sound JUST LIKE ME....20 years ago!!! Sounds great. Makes sense. That's why it was MY PLAN too. Hehehe
Guns scare the crap out of me. I spoke till I was blue in the face about how bad guys shoot people, guns make people dead and how it was bad to use guns, play with guns, or shoot people, animals, or anything...even for pretend. I wouldn't let them play video games that used a gun, or portrayed a gun...even if they were shooting at targets, not living things. I looked openly askance at other mothers whose little boys brandished toy guns.
And my baby took a jelly bullet to the face anyway.
You know that saying "Boys will be boys?" It's actually true! Much to the dismay of peacenik mommies everywhere...it's true!
PS If you're fond of looking at crying children in public and declaring smugly to your husband that you would NEVER let YOUR child behave that way....before you actually have any children of your own...been there done that too.
Trouble is, kids don't read those really excellent parenting books we adults do!
Mom, I understand what you're saying. I don't have kids, so I'm only yapping about things I think I'd do..those things that would be off limits. I don't know. I know it's easier said than done, but I'd still like to try...Like I said, I feel really strongly about it. I'm not particularly uptight when it comes to kids and how they're raised, but I do have a few tree-hugger ideals set in stone :-)
JerseyxJacquie,
Go for it girl. Kids are all different anyway, so you might get one who likes to please. My first son was like having a tasmanian devil in the house. I couldn't have low tables with knick knacks on them, curtains that he could reach, plants, toilet paper on rolls, boxes of tissue, lotion, etc....basically my house was decorated like a rubber room...hehehe. And even at that he went into his room one day and when I went in after him 2-3 minutes later, he had pulled all the drawers on his tall 6-drawer dresser out, each one just a little less than the one before, so it made sort of a "drawer staircase", climbed to the top, got the baby powder down, and was busy making a snowstorm in his room and laughing hysterically. We went to a party once when he was 2and my son went and sat at a picnic table with a very large, beautiful cake on it. I said to him, "Do not put your hands on that cake," (He at least tried to mind. He was just a really BUSY guy!)So, I stood nearby and spoke with somebody for a few minutes, generally keeping an eye on him, but his back was to me. When I told my son it was time to get down form the table to go somewhere else, he turned around and I saw he had a row of blue icing from ear to ear. He had not put his hands on the cake, as I had told him not to do...but he thought up a way to get some anyway. I was completely horrified and embarrassed. This is the peanut butter sandwich gun child.
With my second son, I could have probably made a maze of Ming vases around the house and he wouldn't have touched one if I told him not to. I remember going to a party once with the kids when little boy was 15 months old. I saw him eagerly eyeing a tray of cheese and finger foods on a coffee table and said, "Timmy, don't touch that." He immediately put his hands behind his back and stood looking at the tray. I said, "Do you want mommy to get oyu some cheese?" He smiled and nodded and I got him some cheese. I didn't have to ask him not to touch the tray for the rest of the party. This is the peanut butter sandwich gun victim. But since he wanted ot be just like his big brother, he soon learned to make his own impromptu guns as well.
I still think its normal for boys to turn things into guns. Boys are wild at heart and love to pretend to be "the bad guy" or "the cop". I think when they are little you can let your kids pretend this stuff, when they are older (like once they're in kindergarten) you can let them know that real guns are bad and to not ever touch one. Water guns, nerf guns are okay because they are just toys. Tell them to not point guns at people. Set rules. If you have rules with your toy guns your children will realize that a toy gun is a lot different then a real gun.
seriously, this day and age has changed the world. Back when I was little (I'm 20 years old right now) we were playing cops and robbers and never once did i think "lets go get a real gun". Kids know they're pretending.
atleast if you teach your kids rules, boundaries and right from wrong.
trust me, your boys will make ANYTHING a gun.
I'm not saying I'm all for pretending with guns, i'm saying that boys will be boys and they'll even make legos turn into guns and so forth.
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