Friday

Manny, the Drill Instructor

Received Friday, August 1, 2008.
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Physical description of caregiver: White manny with brown hair, brown eyes, fair skin, flamboyant in his gestures (can I say that?) walked with a very quick pace, small steps, wore tan colored jeans, a plaid shirt made by dickies and Jesus Sandals.

Physical description of involved child/children: One boy of about 7 years old. Medium height, slightly pudgy, dark, dark brown hair, almost black. A thick, shag style haircut, very olive-y skin, green eyes, white polo shirt, surfer print shorts, teva sandal shoes.

Date and time of incident: This afternoon at 3 or about 3.

Address or venue of observed incident: Manhattan - Bryant Park

Detailed description of what you witnessed: I see this guy first and I am watching him because he doesn't look like he belongs on the playground. My radar goes up. So I am watching him and then I see him interact with a child he obviously knows. During the interaction it becomes clear that he is the child's child care provider. The child is being made to run and tag objects and run back to the childcare provider. This isn't so much as a fun game.
The child clearly doesn't want to do this but he is being made to do this. The child is asking to stop. The manny tells the child he is not done. He has the child run and touch this tree or run to the steps or run around this table twice. The kid asks for breaks because he is getting hot. The manny lets him have a break but tells the kid that he shouldn't need a break.

The kid asks to go on a carousel, the manny tells him he is too big for the carousel. The kid says he isn't. The manny says that they can go on the carousel but then proposes a whole list of other runs for the kid. The manny is wearing a pretty basic black watch. I think he is timing the child. None of his comments are especially positive. The nicest things the manny says to the kid are things like "by next month you won't be out of breath so quickly".

Description of vehicle, bag, stroller that may aid in identifying involved caregiver: Just the very weird walk the guy had. He's not effeminate persay, but obviously comfortable with his sexuality.
Side note: Before you say, 'he might be doing exactly what the parents asked him to', I have something to say. Yes, he could. I don't know. I also thought the whole thing was pretty humiliating for a child. I got back to my office and found myself still thinking about that boy and feeling for him.

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

Not all kids like to exercise but some have to. It would be better if he were making this a game but it really doesn't sound that worrysome.

Anonymous said...

To be honest this sounds like the guy is trying to tire out the kid. Maybe tehe kid has a lot of energy and he needs it burned off. Maybe the child likes to play video games all day and needs to get some exercise. If only more people would make their kids run, then we wouldn't have a child obesity problem. I don't think there is anything wrong with this. How do you know it wasn't the dad?

This is better than some other people who have posted on the site saying they give the kids dremamine to calm them down. A little running never hurt a kid

Anonymous said...

So, where did this happen at??

It says the kid is "pudgy", and it's very possible the parents hired this guy for this kid to lose weight.

You can't say, "Please drop and give me 10, o.k.?" .... you know!
As long as the kid isn't being verbally assulted, a little exercise would probably do him some good.

Anonymous said...
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UmassSlytherin said...

I agree with bebe: good call, bebe! Sounds to me as if manny is being asked to get little boy in shape. Just a guess!

Why are you so white? said...

This sounds like the older brother!

MaryPoppin'Pills said...

Thanks for the Update on where this happened, OP.

Anonymous said...

The OP said it may be true parents asked manny to do this, but maybe they didn't think it through on how humiliating it would be. So, maybe they can all put their heads together (if they see this post) and try to come up with more positive ways to have this kid exercise that would be good for his self esteem, rather than make him feel like the 'pudgy kid' he was describe as. Like, rewards, excited words, run with the kid, race the kid, promise carousel after 3 more times, whatever. Parents did not think this through if this was their idea.

Anonymous said...

Exercise should be made to feel like fun for children. There is no faster way to turn them off than to do it by barking orders at them, or it being boring.

If the parents are behind this, I don't think they realize what they've gotten themselves and their son into - this will not do anything for his self-esteem.

Hopefully they'll see this and realize they've made a mistake and try something else.

Anonymous said...

Who cares if he's trying to get the boy in shape??? This is NO way to motivate a child. It will only make him hate exercise. Anyone who works with or has children should know that. Plus today was 90 degrees running sprints especially if he's overweight on such a hot day is not the brightest of ideas. I exercise regularly but when it's so bloody hot out I do it inside. If the OP felt bad for the boy I'm sure others who saw might have too. At least the man could have been encouraging. Like one other comment said perhaps the grown-ups need a sit down to figure out a better way of helping this boy lose weight. You don't humiliate children into doing what you want them to do especially when it comes to exercise and weight.

Anonymous said...

I have done this "game" with many of my charges, they all loved it! We called it an obstacle course and I would list off about 8-10 things they had to do and then come back and give me a 5! The goal was to remember each thing on list in order. I have gotten entire playgrounds of children begging to play and let me tell you a sore hand from so many over eager high fives.

My gut is the parents told this person part (or all?) of his job is to get this kid healthy. If the child finds NOTHING active fun, then maybe it doesn't matter if he complains? I tell my son he HAS to participate in ONE sport- period. For activity, he doesn't have to have fun, he doesn't have to win- he just has to play. He's ok with it! A little grumble and he says soccer this year. He always ends up having fun 80% of the time.

Health is not always easy and fun, it still needs to be done.

Personally- I would take interests this kid already has and figure out a way to make them active. Even Nintendo has Wii fit and PS, rewards and charts can work wonders for more than disapline!

Anonymous said...

Sounds like some sort of coach. And the fact that he mentioned something about being more in shape next month leads me to believe there is some sort of exercise regimine that the parents are very well aware of.

P.S. It's ok to sweat and hurt a little when you exercise. Perhaps this guy was excessive (I wasn't there..couldn't say for sure), but that's the nature of exercise.

P.P.S. I hate a man in Jesus Sandals.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like he is giving a chubby kid a workout. With all the fat kids in the US today maybe he was doing the kid a favor, just because the kid whines does not mean it is wrong.

Anonymous said...

It sounds like the manny has a mandate to get a little couch potato into shape. He doesn't seem to be putting much imagination or creativity into finding a way to make it fun for the boy. There are so many fun ways to play with a 7 yo that incorporate strenuous physical activity, without making them think of it as "exercise". It is sort of like hiding the veggies in other foods.

Anonymous said...

I can't help but wonder if he's supposed to be getting the boy in shape for the upcoming school session so he can make it on a team of some sort. It's really important for some parents that their child is an ace athlete. I've seen this so often like in Little League to the point that it's sickening.

Anonymous said...

Sorry OP, I have to agree with the majority here. My main reason for agreeing, is just the simple statement regarding how much the child would improve in a month. In fact, as a child I went through a very short phase where I was pudgy, and I thank god that my parents got me "back on track" through exercise. I hated having to run laps at the time, BUT I later lettered in 4 different sports, got a full volley ball scholarship into University and still to this day play sports, and keep in shape...I even learned to enjoy exercise (a little...you'd have to be a real gluten for punishment to adore it. haha)

I think this is just a case of concerned parents, but it's a shame the manny hasn't thought of a way to make the exercise more enjoyable! There are so many fun activities a child (or adult) can partake of to burn calories and stay fit.

Anonymous said...

Hmmmm...many thoughts here. And what I am going to say assumes that the man in question was pushing the boy, but not being abusive.

A seven year old should NOT be pudgy. He should have had enough control exercised over his diet and plenty of opprotunities to run and play and swim, etc, so that he was naturally at a normal weight and fitness level without having to resort to this type of "training."

However, somebody clearly dropped the ball and let the child get unhealthy. I think it's probably not all that bad that the child is now doing theses things to catch up "before it's too late"...although, as I have already said, it is sad and unfair to this kid that this has happened in the first place. Now that it has, he's going to have to do some unpleasant work to undo it...but he'll be better off in the long run if he keeps up with this activity. And yes, it will be so much easier by next month! And the child will have achieved something and maybe be proud of his accomplishment.

I have written on here before about a couple of kids we knew who were allowed to get way out of shape by ages 5 and 7. These kids would whine terirbly about having to walk even three blocks to the swimming pool...and then want to swim only for a little bit and then come home. Once they are that out of shape that they are actually getting fat, exercise of any kind is extrememly unpleasant for them and they need to be pushed...yes, against thier will most times.....to undo the damage and prevenet a lifetime of negative effects, both physically and emotionally.

I don't think this sounds like such a bad nanny sighting.

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