Thursday

Mr. Camera Man???

Thursday, July 10, 2008 - Rant
'isyn", "i saw your nanny", nanny, nannies, rant, warning,If you really cared about children,you'll watch the parents; fathers who inappropriately touch their little girls. I've seen it with my own eyes. It's one of the reasons I quit one job. Except for bad apples nannies love,adore and take care of the children assigned to their care as if they were their own.After your check,do you really care about them? I had an on call position for 6 weeks. If I did not give the children a bath on my time before I left,the next morning I'll find them in the dirty clothes I left them in the night before. The 10 month old would have caked dirt on his little toes because he was crawling.I guess that made me a singularly bad nanny and their parents the pillars of society. Where is your website on good nannies? Where is your camera recording the bond between nannies and their charges. Please be informed that nannies are teachers, lawyers, doctors, outstanding members of society. After you've received your check, are you there to hold their hands when they're sick? Are you there recording their nannies encouraging them to take that first? Are you there when those blue eyes look up at you to comfort them when they've hurt themselves? Where is your camera when they run to the front door breathless with anticipation, because nanny is here?Where are you when they lock their arms around your neck because they're so happy to see you? Where are your cameras when we go shopping for them with the little money we have to give them that birthday present?Where are you when they run to NANNY for comfort with a room full of relatives?You have taken the easy route! The hard part is the consistent deputy parent role we play in the lives of the children entrusted to our care.You will NEVER understand the feeling of a new mother entrusting us with the care of her new baby. Have you ever done a "layaway" plan? That's what all children are to us nannies.We clean the runny noses,deal with the temper tantrums,messy eating,spilled food,crayon drawings on the walls,fighting their friends and siblings,and nanny.We put up with with the growing pains,because we know that's the price we must pay for them to be doctors,lawyers, President OF The United States,the researcher who may discover the cure for aids or cancer.We nurture and we nurture. We put up with their bad behaviour,because we understand that they are on "layaway". Where are your cameras to record our love,compassion, altruism and our gift of universal motherhood? Are you planning on attending the funeral of the Long Island nanny who gave her life,knowing that she was not a swimmer to preserve the life of that little boy? His mother paid her less than 1/4 minimum wage.Would you have given YOUR life for that little boy?R ecord THAT Mr.camera man!!!!!!!!!!

24 comments:

emily said...

I hate generalizations.

I'm a nanny and I know that it's frustrating that the only times you hear about nannies in the news is when they've done something bad (with notable exceptions, like this past week). But you know what other group gets the same treatment from the media? Parents! If you read about a mom or a dad in the news, too often it's about something terrible they've done and all the wonderful things go unreported.

If you're a nanny or a parent you don't do it for praise from the media or a website, you do it for the kids that you love and your own personal desire to teach and help the children grow into fabulous little people. If you're looking for more than just the respect of the parents and children in your own little world, you're in the wrong profession! Being a parent or a nanny is a thankless job if you look beyond the backyard, but the best nannies and parents know that they don't need anything more than what's found in that backyard: happy grateful kids.

Anonymous said...

Wow Emily - I must say, you're a great poster, but this is your best one yet.
Really good! Thank you.

Anonymous said...

Very well spoken, Emily!

Anonymous said...

OP: Did someone record you doing something bad?

UmassSlytherin said...

OP, you need to spill.
wth happened? Come on: tell us what's really on your mind!

(taps foot impatiently)

JerseyXJacqui said...

I didn't get the impression that anything happened to OP. What I think is, she came across this site somewhat recently and was appalled by all the crap nannies get (usually by commenters, not the original sightings)....I had those same feelings she posted about when I first found this blog. Now that I've become a bit more acclimated to its intent and purpose, I don't take the bad sightings so personally.

Emily is right though.
You don't take a job like this because you want to be recognized as super nanny. You do it because its something you're passionate about...because all that matters is the child/ren you love and care for while mom and dad are away, not the feedback you may receive.

Anonymous said...

I say OP gets the bitter betty award of the day.

Anonymous said...

I'm an awesome nanny. My charges have awesome parents.

And you know what? I don't think that's all uncommon.

But then again, this site isn't really about that...

Metronanny said...

OP, I hope you called the local authorities and reported the father for touching his daughter inappropriately.

I commend the LI nanny for her bravery but also agree with other people in the section discussing her that she shares in the blame for her fate.

She accepted the position, at the rate of pay offered. No one held a gun to her head. I will never understand why only parents get raked over the coals for paying nannies off the books. Yes that's breaking the law but they can't pay someone off the books unless someone is willing to break the law right along with them and dodge their taxes.

The nanny knew she couldn't swim. Why she agreed to watch three children by a pool she was afraid of is beyond me. I am in full agreement with people who say parents are ultimately responsible for the safety of their children. But I am ultimately responsible for my own safety. If I choose to do something beyond my capability and I get hurt that's my own fault. She endangered those children every time she let them swim.
Again, I've no wish to discredit her bravery and her sacrifice in any way. She was a good woman who loved her charges and made a poor decision that caught up with her. It's unfortunate the parents didn't make a better decision and offer to pay for inexpensive swimming lessons for their nanny.

Sadly, there are too many desperate people looking for work and willing to accept childcare as a job regardless of their ability to perform the duties asked or even the desire to watch children. And let's face it, childcare is a job you must love to be good at. Even sadder, there are so many parents out there willing to buy the best food, clothes, vehicles and homes. They will spend top dollar on their country club membership and kids 1st birthday party. They will spare no expense, except in childcare. Then, for some reason, they think it's perfectly OK to go the cheapest route possible. Honestly, I wonder sometimes if given a choice between all their things and their children what some of these parents would choose. I interviewed in an 8,000 square foot home with a WAH CPA mother and a Lawyer Father. She wanted someone a few mornings a week. She asked for my references, and my resume then insulted me by offering me $5.00 per hour!!!! She said that's what her last sitter charged and she could go as high as $7.00 WHOOPEE! I asked if she realized the insult she had just given me and she looked confused so I asked her if she worked for $7.00 per hour. We parted ways and she called me later that day to say she had thought it over I was right and she was willing to go as high as $9.00. I laughed, thanked her and told her to get serious. I see her kids sometimes at the playground with their park bench nanny who ignores them until they bother her too much then she yells at them. Poor kids.


I work for a very nice family and am appreciated very much. They can't afford to pay me top salary, but they do very well by me and I love their kids. There are perks I can't set a value on like taking the kids to the zoo on a gorgeous day, or washing the car on a steamy one. All of us going out for ice cream and being allowed to act like the indulgent aunt and buy them a book or small toy. Getting a phone call while I'm on vacation from the kids saying they miss me and can't wait until I come back, and don't forget to bring a present. (Like I would forget!). Thinking back to the days when I was stuck in a cubicle on a gorgeous, NNJ day like today instead of getting ready to pick the kids up at school later and take them to the park. Having a picnic on the living room floor on a rainy afternoon after having them draw scenes of grass and flowers and the sun to hang around us while we eat. Sure, the generous Christmas bonus is nice, the fair compensation is appreciated and needed. But I didn't become a nanny to gain monetary wealth. Some riches can't be measured by a bank book.

kathleencares said...

It is true that you only hear about nannies or parents when something bad happens, but that's the media for you. A nanny treating a child well does not make for a juicy story......sad but true.

mpp said...

Emily & Metronanny, excellent posts!!

Anonymous said...

Great posts. I am a nanny employer who works outside the home most of the week but I make a point of working from home at least one or two days a week. There are many nannies and families with both parents working in my neighborhood. With few exceptions, the nannies I see are wonderful, engage thier charges and truly enrich thier lives. And, the same parents who take the time to find good nannies are also involved with the kids. There are unfortunately unqualified people who call themselves nannies and look to do childcare for very little money and parents who don't know the difference between a nanny and a babysitter. I am currently looking for a part-time person to relieve my nanny in the fall so she can go home in the early afternoon and spend more time with her own kids. I'm shocked at some of the responses I've gotten to my ad and some of the rates they quote for themselves. A 17 year old just sent me an e-mail asking for $5 an hour or $150 a week for full time work. I e-mailed her back and told her we were looking for somone with more experience, but also told her she was underpricing herself--the teenagers in my neighborhood ask and get $15/hour.

LindaLou said...

i'm sorry, this post is so poorly written that i could hardly make heads or tails of it. i'm glad others got something out of it though. all i gained was the knowledge that some of our public schools are failing miserables at teaching writing... this is not a person i'd hire to be around my kids.

:::waiting for the *you don't use caps* comments. yes, i'm aware, so don't bother.:::

LindaLou said...

*miserably

JerseyXJacqui said...

Haha lindalou, it was a little painful getting through it. I cringed a bit as I was reading. It hurts to see such botchery of the language.

Maybe the drunk nanny from the Reno NV thread wrote it?

Kidding.

jojo bear said...

Well perhaps some of you should submit some things. Maybe the blog owner was desperate for something that day? I know I sign on looking to see something new (about 4 times a day).

The language of this post is not so much botchery (behaviour) as indicative of someone who speaks a different language. Perhaps an au pair.

UmassSlytherin said...

jojo,
got anymore pics?
;)

Anonymous said...

Metronanny, I totally agree with you. I almost submitted a rant about underpaid nannies I see every day. I take my charge to a park every morning and have gotten to know the other nannies at the park. In a neighborhood of million dollar homes, many of these nannies are working for much less than minimum wage.

Many of them are not allowed to snack at their employer's homes and must bring their own lunches and snacks from home. One of them is not allowed to take bottled water for herself to the park, so she totes around a plastic bottle from home she must fill from the tap. I will never understand people who skimp on childcare or treat their nannies like trash.

I am lucky enough to work for a wonderful family who pay me a fair well and treat me great.

Anonymous said...

"Maybe the blog owner was desperate for something that day?"

Gee, that's kinda rude, JoJo.

As for the post, maybe something happened right before this nanny wrote her rant, and that explains why it is so messy.
People tend to write really fast, wanting to get their whole thought out, whatever the case may be, when they are mad.
I mean, who the hell is going to take the time to spellcheck when they are pissed?
Cut her some slack.

Marissa M. said...

Wait, did I read that right? The long island nanny got 1/4 of the minimum wage?

You can tell a lot about parents when they pay their employees so little. Shame on anyone for taking advantage of someone in financial need.

Anonymous said...

Very hard to read this post due to it's scattered nature. What does a father touching his daughter have to do with nanny pay?

Your post totally sucks.

Starbuck said...

HERE HERE!!! Well said! I would shake your hand if I could.

Don't listen to any of the negative comments here, they're completely misunderstanding what you have written.

Nannies are under valued and under appreciated, not just underpaid!

JerseyXJacqui said...

JoJo, was that your way of implying I spelled the word behavior incorrectly? I suck at comprehending your posts, haha.

You could be right. It does come off as broken English.

Anonymous said...

Clearly the OP regrets her rant, otherwise she's be on here answering commenter's questions.