Place: Aquarium of the Pacific (Long Beach)Day: June 19th, 2008
Time: apprx. 1-2pm
Children: 1 blond curly hair boy and 1 girl with super short hair.
Caregivers: 3 Mexican women eating lunch in the cafe. The offending woman was wearing a gray tank-top and camouflage pants, lots of lipstick. Did not notice the
other 2 doing anything wrong. But the other woman with her was a large woman wearing jeans and a paisley-type short sleeve shirt. Both had hair in ponytails. I Did not take note of the 3rd woman.
Other Details: Green cooler bag, small pink bath and body works bag. Kids were eating a variety of things. Danimals Yogurt and also pizza. Caregivers eating tortillas from a tall bag.
While the other 2 women were not at the table, the little blond hair boy sat down in a chair, the woman in camouflage yelled at him. As we were busy trying to find a table, i'm not sure what it was about, but I think it was because she wanted him at another table. She yelled at him on 2 other instances as well. Once he was whimpering a bit and she yelled "Why are you crying?" very close to his face. After the other 2 women arrived at the table, the little boy moved over to eat with the other larger woman.
This is all I saw, so I don't know if anything else happened before, or after this. But it was enough to upset me and the person I was with.
Attached are 3 photos:
#1 Camouflaged Woman
#2 The large woman with her
#3 The large woman and the little boy who was getting yelled at
48 comments:
It sounds a bit harsh to hear your description of these ladies. It's just as easy to describe someone without being offensive. This is just my opinion though. Take no offense if you disagree.
That being said good job on posting this sighting. I'm glad that someone is being an advocate for this poor child being screamed at.
I dunno. I'm a little big (haha, love that oxymoron!), and I wasn't offended.
OP didn't say fat ass or anything.
She said "large" and "larger" ... and well ..... they WERE!
So sad for the little boy. His face is blocked, but you can tell the way he's sitting really stiff-like, that he's uncomfortable.
Are you kidding me? This is getting ridiculous!
Bad/Abusive nanny for raising her voice to a child who is old enough to listen when being told where to sit but does not?
I am sorry ..I know Jane has issues with a poster being attacked but come on folks..what parent doesn't get a little frustrated when our kids don't listen?
There is nothing abusive about raising your voice to a child.It is called discipline.
The age of reason is 8 and until then, sometimes in order to get a child to listen you may have to raise your voice or give a time out.
And I cannot tell you how many times I see parents lean in and ask their child"why are you crying"?..it is a question asked of toddlers day in and day out..it just goes with the territory.
I am sorry but I think this sighting is not worthy of a post.
Just an opinion..pls don't attack me!
you can't even see the kids body..you can see the top of his head!
Sitting stiff?? What the hell?
Raising your voice to a child and yelling in their face in public are two different things. You're right, nothing wrong with talking in a raised voice if the child is not listening. I got the impressing from OPs post that this was not the case. If she was upset enough by what she saw to post here on this blog then I'm assuming it was a bit more than just a raised voice.
I'm trying to figure out the workout regime utilized by the large woman. Her hamstrings have tremendous definition. She must do something that uses alot of leg action and yet no arm or torso movement. Unicycle?
not exactly sure why the nanny's workout regime is an issue. that was pretty much just a rude comment and not funny.
i also think it's pretty invasive and just wrong to take pictures of the woman in the paisley who wasn't even involved. what was she doing, sitting near the woman who yelled? so you thought it was cool to take her picture and post it online. that really blows and i think it's a shame that people are cool with that.
you know, i hate when people are abusive but posting pictures of someone who didn't do anything is just wrong.
1229...I agree.Well stated. Maybe a few invasive pro=picture posters will take heed.
That is so gross. Why in the world to parents hire people like this? I highly doubt that she could keep up with her 2 year old charge on the playground or anywhere else. And not to mention that being that overweight does not portray a healthy body image for that child.
Oops. Typo. Sorry. I meant to say why DO parents hire people like this!
3:24-That was my same thought.
Nice butt crack photo. What the hell are we supposed to ID from that one?
If you can't recognize the nanny, then you can recognize her friends. DUH
this post is a joke. And to all of you anti fat snobs..grow up. Not all women are a freakin size 10!!
I weigh 230 lbs. All 3 of my children were born at home.Unlike most of you sz 10's who no doubt were medicated by the time you dialated to 5....I am a strong woman who takes fabulous care of my children and my man.. 2 of my kids are under age 2. I chase them all over the place and keep up with them just fine!We walk to the park 3-4 times a week and play outside in our backyard everyday.
We do not eat fast food and we are up by 6am 5 days a week!. I just don't burn off my weight like most people who are as active as I m do!
I have been heavy since I was 10!
My husband and I have a large circle of friends, I am by far the biggest women and the only one who is not complaining about how tired I always am or how sore my back is or griping about my Fibromyalgia or bitching cause I never get a break!
I am healthier than all of my 150 lb friends..you need a reality break. And for the two idiots above who remarked about "being that overweight portrays an unhealthy body image for that child"..you are ignorant. Any child is much better off with a fat nanny as oppossed to one like either of you who will no doubt raise him to be judgemental and predjudice against fat people.
Well let me tell you cheerleader suzy..I am the big beautiful women who not only gets to be a SAHM but I got the house and the guy you wanted..not because I shook my little sz 10 ass..I had quite a bit more than that to real him in!In everyway!
Heres a quote you can stick in your pipe, snobs.
"I may be fat but you are ugly and I can lose weight"
Fat chicks are harder to kidnap
more bounce for the ounce
now kiss my big ol' fat ass
10:57 (aka Chip)
Glad to hear that you are healthy and energetic and so incredibly "happy" (although the extremely angry nature of your post suggests something to the contrary.)
How about letting up on the reverse discrimination a bit? Suzy Cheerleader may have a 175 IQ and a sparkling personality along with her rockin' ass too.
So sorry to hear that your friend has fibromyalgia, and that you are so unsympathetic to her pain. I hear that's an incredibly painful disease which, by the way, is unrelated to weight whatsoever.
LOL 10:57 Amen!
This post really IS ridiculous. And the pictures? Those poor women. OP had a hidden agenda here..and it had to do with her issues with these women (I speculate their weight just from the gist of the sighting and pictures), not the child.
And to those of you who don't think a "larger" woman can take care of kids? What world are you living in? I can understand that if they're grossly obese, out of shape and unhealthy...but there is a very grey area between THIN and GROSSLY Obese. I have known many very capable mothers who were well over what society deems the "acceptable" weight...Their weight was never an issue when it came to how well they could "keep up" with their kids and raise them. That's just a flawed argument and a passive aggressive way of displaying your dislike (disgust?) of "overweight" women.
Ugh. Although I am one of the thin girls anon 10:57 is targeting (haha, funny post), I couldn't agree with her more. Some of you sound downright ignorant and I hate to say it, DUMB.
1108 anon..there is no chip on my shoulder. My post was an angry response to the flat out ignorance that finds it's way to this site everyday. To imply that a large woman is unable to keep up with her children or is portraying an "unhealthy body image" for a child is absurd.
By the way..cheerleader Suzy's post does not reflect a 175 IQ...nor does yours.
As for the Fibromyalgia remark you made, That was just your attempt to make me look bad as you had nothing of value to bring to the conversation, so you took a cheap shot below the belt. See, it sucks when you have a great ass but nothing upstairs to fight back with. Maybe if this were a web cam you would prevail, but as luck would have it, it's not and so I will prevail.
And just so we are clear..anon 11:08..I am not discriminating against thin women..(1 of my dearest friends has a smoking hot body )I am discriminating against women who run their mouths about subjects they know nothing about,women who base all their statements on their own predjudices and insecurities..women like you.
Just to show you I can be a good sport, tonigh when my husband smacks my ass..I'll scream out anon 11:08 just for you honey!
JXJ, I knew you and a few others would not be offended by my "cheerleader Suzy remark" I have read this blog long enough to know that you are a smart& confident women. Your posts are 99% of the time objective and 99% passionate(I feel as mommies/nannies we give about 200% of ourselves everyday)and your advice is always fabulous.
We have gone toe to toe a few times but that is often what makes for a good debate.
I am glad to know that like myself, you do not judge others by their size .Thank you for that. see you on the next post.
Fat people are everywhere. They are people just like you and I. Some eat too much. Some don't exercise. Some are addicted to food. They are no worse and no better than you are I.
I teach my children to respect all people and to treat every person the same until they give you a reason not to.
In defense of this post. It's easier to take a picture than commit a description to memory.
When describing fat people, authors are taken to task. Truthfully, how would you accurately describe this fat person if you needed to?
"Nanny had very low stomach, extraordinarily tight jeans and three distinct rolls of fat. Her back was quite wide and her shirt was about two sizes to small"
And if the point is that she is not the culprit, I look at it two ways- 1) It can still help identify who the nanny is or 2) Because of her girth, she impeded the author's attempt to photograph the wayward nanny.
To ro:
Lol, I assume you are talking about the middle picture. I believe that the reason her leg looks so comparatively thin and toned is not because it is but... because the soda bottle in the forefront of the picture is in the way and the curves of the bottle make it look like that is the curve of her leg. Does that make sense?
To Anon at 12:27 PM,
So you say:
"And if the point is that she is not the culprit, I look at it two ways- 1) It can still help identify who the nanny is or 2) Because of her girth, she impeded the author's attempt to photograph the wayward nanny."
That's disgusting! You are trying to sound like you're nice but you're really low. If you think it's okay to photograph someone who didn't do anything wrong then don't complain if someone photographs your kid. You may not think it's the same thing but oh well I guess it's up to the person with the camera.
10:57
You sound miserable even tho you ar bragging abut your weight problem.
I certainly hope that you nor any one else gets fibro.
My sister is almost bed ridden on many days from the disease. You get on here and brag about your weight while cutting down someone who complains about a very painful disease. You sound very bitter about your own situation. I think I would rather be over weight then to be in pain contantly.
9:37 You still do not need to scream at a kid . So he didn;t sit where she wanted him to sit so she yells at him. Sounds to me he was interfering with her getting her food in her mouth,if people yell at their kids in public I wonder what they would have done if no one was looking?
Seems like we have nannies and moms who think it is ok to berate and verbally abuse children in here.
"More bounce to the ounce", heehee. I love it! :)
I know I will be shouted at for saying this, but in my opinion the way somebody looks says something about themselves, and in this instance I would not employ a woman that looks like that to look after my young children.
I have recently employed a new nanny after our wonderful nanny of 3 years decided to move on(we live in London, UK) and I would always look for somebody energetic, with a healthy attitude to life and food, a good lifestyle and somebody that will be a good role model for my children. There are plenty of good professional nannies arround, yes you will have to pay a good salary adn their taxes but you are paying for quality.
I know some overweight people that have tremendous energy, and I know some very thin people who seem lethargic in comparison, so that isn't much of an issue in my opinion. I do, however, think it's ideal that someone who cares for children have high energy. The poster of this sighting obviously had genuine concern over what she saw and I respect her for posting her sighting. That's where our opinions often conflict with those of others on here, as some will not see this as a genuine sighting of sub par childcare, yet others will.
Public displays of this kind of harshness directed at a wee child are difficult for me to view, and I've often wondered whether the treatment gets much worse at other times. Something made this poster determine that this needed to be reported, and we should appreciate that, whether or not we agree about the severity of the incident. I believe in erring on the side of the child, if it must come to that.
anon 154..you are a silly silly poster. You make things into something they are not and twist potsts and words.I will admit you are good at it.Perhaps you should consider a career in a literary position.
I will not defend my position on fibromyalgia with you.
I will however tell you, that if you feel the need to knock people because of their weight as well as assume that because a woman is not a size ten she could not possibly be a happy person, you have serious issues..most of them I would guess relate directly to your own self estemm( if you are not a perfect ten you are flawed)
I truly hope that weather you are suzy cheerleader or fat Freida, you will someday realize, being a good person means acceptance, tolerance and forgiveness..it means kindness and patience and does not mean assuming you know what people are all about and judging them on that assumption.It most certainly has nothing to do with your outside appearance at all!
I am a truly happy and blessed woman, God gives me energy and endurance to chase after 3 children, he has blessed me with a loving and passionate husband, a good life with great friends and a little perk..he gave me a sense of humor and tremendous confidence to help me deal with women like you. I wish you the same at somepoint soon in your life.
Too much chow time at McDonalds...
BTW..anon 154..I do not have a weight problem..rather..you have a problem with my weight!
Cheers sister!
Now ..it's Friday..I need to get out from in front of this computer and ready to enjoy the weekend ..it is 91 and gorgeous! Hope you all can do the same!
9:10 - maybe by the red thong?
I dont care how big you are, as long as you can care for my child and keep up with him/her for the most part- which is generally hard to do for any young healthy person.
You can be 180pounds of muscle and do a great job or you can be 180 pounds of pure lard and completely suck at your job. This person however is not healthy as anyone can see.
As long as you don't consume junk food, pop and processed sugared goods around my kid all day and encourage him/her to eat healthy I'm happy by your 180pound butt being a role model- again as long as you are healthy.
Any idiot can however see that this woman is obese and NOT healthy. I don't need you going into cardiac arrest on my clock.
Maybe she needs to stay away from the 150 calories per serving tortilla chips and green can of pop on the table and replace it with baked chips and water or pure juice.
Better choices people better choices.
If anyone thinks its nasty of me to "discriminate" against unhealthy caregivers than so be it. Its not about the size for me its about health and good influences.
now go ahead, rip me a part. I know whats coming
Tell that to my sister's youngest daughter. Her elbow was fractured when their rotund nanny tripped over a case of Nutter Butters and fell on the poor child. It never did heel right. Poor thing just kind of flops it all over the place. She's the only child we allow to have her elbows on the table at holiday dinners. Poor thing needs to brace it somewhere.
I am the person who reported these women. I am a nanny myself and yesterday happen to be my day off and I was spending it with my child. I have never reported anyone before.
I have cared for the same wonderful child for two years.
The way this woman spoke was completely inappropriate. It wasn't just a "bad day" stern/annoyed talk. It was yelling that could be heard several tables away.
I had a headache from the heat by the time we sat down yesterday otherwise I would of had more details.
I didn't say larger to mock her,I would have no room to speak!
The child was young. I stink at guessing ages, but he was way too little to understand what he was getting yelled at for.
The non-offending woman is in the picture, because I suspected she might be the nanny of these children as the little one sat with her to eat. And even if she wasn't, the parents may recognize her. If she is the nanny, she is letting the other nanny/her friend discipline the child in an inappropriate manner.
"I do not have a weight problem..rather..you have a problem with my weight!"
That SO needs to be printed up on some T-shirts!
I love it! lol
You go, girl!
You keep referring to a size 10 as the perfect size or a small size or whatever, but I had always heard that it is the size 6 that is considered "perfect"... I understand that you can be quite fit/tone/firm and wear a size 10 and be a bit pudgy and wear a smaller size, but still...
Statistically, the average female size in the US is a sz 14.
I think if a woman takes good care of herself, eats healthy, and wears a sz 14, THAT'S a perfect size!
This is the best theme song for this thread...
^^^^
Wow, looks like ISYN is being graced by a Celebrity!
I would ask people to refrain from posting pictures of nannies who are not guilty of wrong doing. A picture and description of the offending nanny, and description of the child should be easy for a parent to recognize.
I sometimes have play dates with nannies who are not only NOT my friends, but whom I think are horrid nannies. They aren't abusive, but let's just say we (and our employers) have different standards of care. I endure it because their charges are children my charges like, or the play date is set up by the moms. I would be mortified if my picture were posted on the Internet as guilt by association!
I would have to agree with you there. Did OP say the blonde with the short hair (3rd photo) wasn't involved?
If not, her face should probably be covered.
10:57 What does being fat have to do with giving birth at home? Maybe the fat cells have taken over your brain and made you confused. Drop 100 lbs and you may get smarter.
'Scuse me, but how does anyone know that the "offending woman" in question is, in fact, the nanny, not the mother?
And enough with the fat bashing...it's just stupid and irrelevant!
Um, I am with Anon at 5:57p.m....
there is a blond woman in the last photo whose face isn't covered. Why is the kid's face covered and not hers?
anon 1101..having a baby at home takes great strength,endurance and discipline .You have to be healthy or a midwife will not allow you to birth at home and though he/she cannot stop you,if you are the least bit unhealthy your doctor will not approve an at home birth.. Your dumb ass remark shows your ignorance.
Point was..just because you are fat does NOT mean you are not healthy .If you are healthy enough to birth 3 children at home, you are healthy enough to do anything!
I birthed my children at home and was out shopping the next day and then had guests over for dinner that night.
What were you doing..laying on your ass in the hospital or at home?
I am sure while you were birthing your litter(that is what they call pups born to a bitch right?)you were as drugged as they would allow.How proud you must be.
"there is a lot more to life than how fat or thin you are"
-K.A.
"No diet will remove all the fat from your body because the brain is entirely fat.Without a brain, you might look good, but all you could do is run for office."
-G.B.S.
Anon 1101..sounds like you could very well run for office and win! Cheers sister!
6:39
I think I know who you are ....
you go, girl!!
6:39, you know what? I like you. :)
My sister who is a size 22-24 (womens), also birthed 3 children at home. She also takes step classes twice a week (while I watch the kidos) and has more energy than I do (I'm a size 6/8 misses, and 4 years younger. ha) I also work out at the gym (4 times a week), but I'll be damned if I can keep up with her and her 3 boys (under 4 years old)! I'm always the one who has to sit down on the bench and rest, and she's the one rolling her eyes...and I recently had a physical and was told I was in top shape...apparently she's just super woman! ;)
Cheers to all the super women out there regardless of size!
Thanks for the vote of confidence 736 & 103 am's!
Do you like funny stories. Here are 2 true stories directly related to my weight.
When my husband & I met I was a sz18 and weighed 200lbs.
After 4 yrs of dating we married.
All these yrs later I am a sz 22 womens.
This man loves my body and though we do tease each other once in a while, the only time weight ever comes up is during sex"uh, honey..that really sounds fun but one of us is going to end up with a broken leg if we do that"giggle-giggle
our first week married,(we did not live together beforehand) my husband was helping with the wash. He pulled my panties out of the washer and said"honey,why did you wash your cargo net?">>>>Smart ass!! We both laughed for days over that.
My husband rides a Harley( we just put over 2,000 miles on it taking a trip to Sedona ,AZ..it was wonderful.)and about 6 months ago he and the guys took off for the day to hit a Harley shop that was having a huge sale.
They came back with T-shirts for eveyone except me, I got a Harley Walet. My husband apologised . "Honey, I am sorry. I looked, but they did not have any 3 wides"..I looked at him in disbeleif, almost laughing,and said, "excuse me..any 3 wides!??" and he said" yeah, all your tags say 3W..thats 3 wide right?"
My girlfriends and I cracked up.."it's 3 womens you dork!"
He was so embarassed..he truly thought it was 3 wide and knowing that he thought that all these years makes me love him even more!
He is a gem!!
Size is not what counts..it is what kind of women you are that really matters!and a sense of humor really helps!!
So I second your thought on "super women" More power to all of you..fat or thin..be happy and don't ever let anyone tell you "you can't" you CAN, regardless of size!
3:50
I absolutely LOVE your attitude. I bet you and your hubby have so much fun together!
Some teasing is o.k., as long as it doesn't go too far, or is said with malice to really hurt the other person's feelings. I know my family is like this, and we are forever playing jokes on each other, too.
You sound like you have it all together! Good for you!
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