Received Wednesday, May 7, 2008-Perspective and Opinion
I have a problem I would like some advice on. I have been friends with a woman for about 5 years she is also a nanny. She told me recently that she is burned out by nannying and does not enjoy her current job as much as her last where she had a lot of daytime freedom. I did not really see her in her job i.e. how she relates to the children, looks after their needs and the house etc. I only know her on a personal basis. I recently was at the home where she works visiting her and what I saw was a bit surprising. She curses in front of both children (4,2.5) and not just a damn here or there it was full on cursing (f, mf etc). Also it was beautiful outside and they have a great back yard I was there for an hour and a half and the kids watched tv the whole time and she told me they had been watching for about 3 HOURS! while she was online or on the phone. She also told me this is the norm for their day. While I was there both children asked for a drink and some sort of snack she said "Hold on you just had breakfast an hour ago" this was 1pm! I asked her if she really meant breakfast and she said "Yeah I was busy and lost track of time" busy meaning IMing with her boyfriend as she was still doing then. I am friends with this person but really think she should not be a nanny. She makes an excellent nanny wage, more than I do and I work twice as hard, and the parents are nice people. I'm just really worried that she has a negative impact on these children. How should I handle this situation? Should I confront her and tell her I think she needs to find a new job? Should I anonymously tell the parents? We are not extremely close friends but I do not want to see her lose her income and perhaps not be able to find a new job if she gets fired. I would feel as if I betrayed her but on the other hand these kids are suffering at her hand. I'd like to hear from all of you what your thoughts are. Thanks.