Received Friday, May 23, 2008 - Rant
In my life, I have never tasted kashi, not a single shred. I wouldn't eat oranges out of a can or jar, that's unnatural. So, why are their notes on the cans and jars of oranges, why is the kashi marked, "do not touch"? What's so special about that flavor of Progresso soup? If it's your favorite, maybe you should by three or four? Really I can't drink the propel? I really like the propel and those days I go straight through from 8:00-7:00, I am always looking for something healthy to grab so I can keep energized to chase after your two children. The barbecue sauce really bothers me. Have I ever in all my time here ever set about randomly barbecuing in the middle of the afternoon? Do you think I host secret nanny functions where I fire up your super special stainless steel grill? Do I even cook for you? How in God's name are your barbecue sauces in so much peril that you have to mark them, protect them? The last picture. I'm a nanny, I work all day with two children under five years old. You're really going to say no to the Ciroq vodka? "Please don't use". I'm working with your children during the day, are you suggesting it's okay to pour myself a shot of Hornitos or Johny Walker, so long as I keep my mitts off the oh so special because it's made from grapes and pimped by P. Diddy? Did you forget that you hired me from Utah? Do you remember specifically advertising in Utah because you were looking for a Mormon nanny. Do I ever go out? Reek of alchohol? And in your fancy, multi tiered pantry, why are certain pasta sauces off limits to me? Yes to the Ragu, Paul Newmans and Prego; No to the Raos and Patsy's? Do you eat the Ragu? I just don't understand you. You give me a car to drive, a nicer car than I will ever be able to afford, you pay the insurance on it, provide all of the gas and pay my easy pass, even for weekends and you never bat an eye, but this is what the pantry looks like? I'm a live-in nanny. Room and board is included in the deal. Are you worried that I will take advantage of you and gorge myself on blood oranges and Kashi? What is it? How bad could it possibly be?