Received Tuesday, April 15, 2008- Rant
I am so angry. My nanny was off early yesterday as both my husband and I came home early. She had the 2 year old's dinner prepared for us and she was off. We fed the child and then took him outside to play because it was very nice out. We played ball and chased him around the yard. He was wearing a long sleeved turtleneck. We played outside from 6-645 ish. At 730, my husband dressed him for bed, gave him a bottle and put him down for the night. My son, who wakes up every night at least once woke up as he usually does crying. This time when I went in, he appeared to be shivering. I flipped out and became enraged. The nanny had never turned the heat back on last night. It was obviously not needed during the day but I was beside myself angry that my child was shivering. When I saw her this morning, I screamed my head off at her. Do you know what she had the audacity to say to me? That WE should have turned the heat back on. Then, she made some sort of reference to the fact that we were outside without jackets until 7PM, just before his bedtime. The nanny abhors heat and is on the same floor with the child, I think she intentionally didn't turn the heat back on yesterday because she is a selfish person and only thinks of herself. And when I was giving her a piece of my mind, she had the nerve to say to me, "well you were watching television in the living room last night, were you cold, were you cold?" Isn't the point that she turns the heat down in the morning all the information needed to know that she should have turned the heat up in the evening? The first floor is on one thermostat, the second floor on another thermostat and the third floor on another thermostat. The nanny and child both have rooms on the first floor. We sleep on the second floor. (The third floor is an office, guest room, home gym and playroom).
192 comments:
I think your failure to realize the lack of heat does not account for you flipping out on your nanny. If it was required to be turned back on at night, you should have done so. It was fine throughout the day and maybe when she left, since as she said you were out without a coat on that night. Stay home with your child if you have such a problem with it so that you can control things yourself.
you should also probably be on the same floor as YOUR child. not the nanny.
It is probably a master suite on that floor. Don't make inference like that when housing design is so varied. Sounds like a weird set up. Address the problem at hand.
Mom was wrong.
You have got to be kidding right???? Are you so incapable as a mother that you cannot check the thermostat yourself in the evening when you put YOUR child to bed???? I check the temperature and thermostat setting every night before retiring to bed myself to be certain it will be set at a comfortable level for the entire family. Screaming at your nanny for such an "infraction" that ultimately should be YOUR responsibility just shows how clueless and unstable you are. God bless your nanny for tolerating you. And by the way I am NOT a nanny myself, I work part time as a Laboratory Tech and full time as a Mom.
Lisa in Texas
I'm glad I never worked for anyone like you. Take some responsibility it is your house. You sound like a lunatic.
Wow. We often forget to change the heat/air conditioning in our house, not because we're lazy or selfish or passive aggressive, but because we don't always think about it until we become too hot or cold. We tend to go on our comfort level rather than an obsessive need to have it be an exact certain number of degrees at specific times of the day and night.
Are you trying to also say that you require a certain amount of heat, which your nanny finds uncomfortably hot, to be on on the floor where she lives...and so you suspect that she is purposely "forgetting" to use the heat because she "selfishly" (as you described her)does not want to roast in her bed? Because she has feelings too. When you have a nanny, yes, she is an employee, but she should also be treated like a person with feelings. Since there are different heaters for every floor of the house, you should not interfere with what temperature she chooses for her floor. I'm sure your son will survive. Put a blanket sleeper on him, with a t-shirt underneath if necessary.
I am sort of surprised at the way you describe her talking to you though. I don't think I'd speak to my employer that way under most circumstances. But I would be looking for another job today if I were her, because I'm equally surprised that you "screamed your head off at her." You have no right to do that either...unless you found her puropsely harming or abusing your child...and this incident falls far short of that.
What makes people think that because they pay somebody's salary they have the right to treat them any darn way they please? I hope the poor nanny is not dependent on this particular job.
Oh my goodness. The OP needs mental help. Poor nanny.
OP What I mean to say, but forgot, is that what most surprises me about you screaming your head off at your nanny (not that that isn't awful enough in itself) is that you seem to think, even at this point, that it was an OK thing to do.
I can hardly imagine any excuse for that...but at least if you had said you were terribly embarrassed and sorry for your behavior...that you had apologized profusely and were going to do something special for her to make sure she understood that you realized you were out of line and that she had your word you would never treat her that way again...maybe this would be less shocking.
Wow. First of all, I forget to turn the heat on in the evening sometimes. I personally would never notice, but my husband does in the middle of the night. He is annoyed, but doesn't ever call me selfish, or imply I did it on purpose!? Seriously, if you feel so strongly, fire her and move on. She doesn't deserve your abuse!
Secondly, what two year old drinks from a bottle and still wakes at night?! The parents might need some serious child development classes! Try ECFE!
I call hoax on this email.
You screamed at a woman because she forgot to turn YOUR heat on and you didn't realize it would be cold?
No one is this irrational
It simply cannot be a real complaint.
Chill out. Own up. Turn the heat back on before putting your child to bed, since that is part of YOUR nighttime routine. And apologize to your nanny, you selfish prat.
YOUR house, YOUR heating system, YOUR freezing child -- YOUR REPSONSIBILITY!!!
Did you not read the part where I said I found my child shivering? Or the part where I said my nanny doesn't like the heat? Are you purposely rushing to the aid of this "poor nanny"? This poor nanny who didn't even express concern over the shivering child?
I'm done with this blog. I just don't know who is on here anymore. Certainly no one with common sense.
So mom is watching tv after the child goes to bed in the living room on the first floor? Sorry, but if mom wasnt cold enough to feel the cold, then the house probably wasnt as cold as you are imagining it to be. Im beginnning to doubt the child was even shivering.
If this isn't a hoax the OP is a fruitcake soaked with way too much rum.
Screaming at her Nanny because she and her husband didn't turn the heat on? Why is the child sleeping on another floor and not near the parents at night?
A 2 yr old that still is on the bottle and getting up in the middle of the night? I bet it is for another bottle.
Try feeding your child real food at dinner time, dress him appropiately for sleep and buy him some blankets or a feather quilt .
My 2 yr old knew how to cover herself up if she kicked off her blankets. The nanny probably is expected to get up all night long with the child too!
You were way out of line screaming at your nanny for your stupidty.
I can see why the nanny yelled back
she probably has had it up to here with your stupidity and neglect and bullying.
OP you are done with this blog? LOL
Well in a way that is good because we don't want nannies to think all
parents are playing with 4 beers short of a 6 pack.
"No common sense" is you not checking your own blasted thermostat to be certain YOUR child would be comfortable through out the night. If this was specifically your nanny's job then a reminder would have been warrented. NOT you screaming your head off at her like a lunatic! Maybe she didn't seemed as "concerned" as you would have liked because she is so use to your irrational behavior. If she is technically "off" after your husband and you come home for the evening then it is definately YOUR responsibility and not hers.
Lisa in Texas
This is the OP again. There is more of a back story. That is that the nanny is always complaining about the house being too hot. In fact, she has asked a number of times for permission to open her window at night. She says she "can't breathe" because it is so hot. She even bought one of those things you stick under your door to prevent a draft so that no cold air comes out of her room. So, she clearly has issues with hear. She also has suggested more than once that heating the house to 70 degrees at night is too hot.
Maybe I am just frustrated that I am dealing with a nanny that doesn't seem to know her place. Maybe it came out in the wrong way.
The last thing I owe her is an apology. I wonder how much money has been pissed out her open windows this winter? What I need is to provide her with a bill!
I would not be able to sleep in a house that was 70 degrees at night. Everyone does have different comfort levels. You should have just reminded her to please turn the heat back on later in the day if that is what you want. Spring is a transitional time and you don't need the heat on all the time some days. Such a big deal about nothing!
If you bill her and she pays you, use the money for psychiatric help for yourself.
without reading any of the other responses, I have got to ask:
this is a joke post, correct?
?
?
?
It has to be.
It just has to be a joke.
If it is, it's funny!!! :)
But if it's not....someone needs therapy. :(
OP you have to be KIDDING. maybe 70 degrees is too hot at night. learn how to back down when you are WRONG. there is no excuse for flipping out on your nanny for something that was your responsibility. I hope she quits on the spot and leaves you without help and maybe passes the word onto the other nannies how terrible of an employer you are so no one else needs to be so unfortunate as to have to put up with your abuse. it sounds like your child is better off with the nanny than with you anyway. Children learn from modeling. Is your irrational behavior what you want your son to learn?
It's easy to blame someone else for your irresponsibility, isn't it?
"Maybe I am just frustrated that I am dealing with a nanny that doesn't seem to know her place. Maybe it came out in the wrong way."
Doesn't know her place?
Oh I'd hate to see the little monster you'd churn out on your own. Thank goodness you've had the good sense to hire a nanny and limit the damage you can do.
Her place is caring for your child.
I believe her (overheated) ass belongs on a pedestal.
I meant in the home, her comfort is not foremost. It is the comfort of the child that should be most important, SUE DOE!
Your nanny has to ASK to open her own window? FYI - legally, she does not. It is her place of residence, to do with as she pleases as long as she doesn't cause damage.
I, for one, absolutely CANNOT sleep if I'm too cold or too hot at night - and if I can't sleep, I'm not very awake for my job the next day. Buy a space heater for your kid's room, or move him to a different floor. If the nanny is roasting rather than sleeping, your kid is not getting her best during the day. Also, running one space heater rather than heating the whole first floor is bound to be cheaper (since you seem to be WAY more concerned with your money than with your nanny - who is, by the way, an actual human being).
Yeah, maybe she wasn't all that concerned that your kid was shivering. Maybe she's so fed up with you treating her badly that she resents having to work for you. If she knows you're concerned with her comfort then maybe she won't feel like she has to spend so much energy fighting for herself, and she'll have more energy to spend on concern for your kid.
Also OP - if EVERY SINGLE PERSON who has commented thinks you're completely in the wrong, don't you think it's possible that you ARE?
Tee hee.
Nothing like a screaming mother to keep your home "comfortable" for a child.
Why can't you just admit you're wrong?
Why can't you admit that the nanny is a person deserving of respect?
I'm sure you're embarrassed but really, would you want someone to treat your child like that?
Believe me. Plenty o' moms here don't like me much but many agree with me.
Just be nice. Your kid will turn out better.
I agree with this being a fake one. No mother is that stupid.
Hmmm... What if the mother was actually very upset with herself and instead was projecting her rage on to the nanny? Maybe she saw the child shivering and got so upset and felt so guilty and she did not process her emotions correctly.
I think A) we are being to hard on OP and B) OP is probably too hard on OP and definitely C) Op is to hard on the nanny.
Unless your house dropped to a severe temperature, which I cannot imagine since you were apparently watching television on that same floor and did not notice the heat/lack of heat so it was probably comfortable, I think you are overreacting. Your child is fine!
My friend was a nanny for a 6-year-old and her employer made her work soon after major surgery, when she was completely drugged up on painkillers. Some mothers are ABSOLUTELY that stupid.
Two indicators that this parent is lazy and detatched. Who refers to their child as "the two year old" and "the child"?
Also, still drinking a bottle? Some are slower than others, but in this case I believe it's just laziness.
I am so glad I do not work for that woman! Wow.
Someone who doesn't want to reveal the name of their own child???
OP, no amount of backstory will make it acceptable that you "screamed your head off" at the person who raises your child for you. That's NOT what adults do.
Could you imagine working in an office and having your boss screaming "SHUT THE GOD DAMN WINDOW, I'M FREEZING!"
Unreal.
lauren, ZING over your head.
It wasn't that she didn't give her kid a name. It was the fact that she said THE two year old. THE child.
How about "My child" "Our child" "My son" "my daughter" etc. etc.
Wow, OP, get a grip. You're so far out of line it isn't even funny. I hope nanny is out the door today, because you're so irresponsible and unreasonable that no one should work for you!
If the temperature is such an issue, buy a programmed thermostat, for heaven's sake.
Then get see about acquiring a slave from a third-world trafficker so that you can force your employee to live at exactly the temperature you deem appropriate.
I agree with one of the posters above - the only sensible thing about your post is that you hired someone else to raise your child. You really, really shouldn't try that on your own. One like you is already too many on the planet.
It was a tiny, tiny mistake. It's not even a mistake really but something a lot less than that but you were 'enraged' and screamed your head off... Absolutely ridiculous. That's not normal, is it?
Your child wouldn't have woken up shivering if he/she had blankets. Plenty of people don't sleep with the heater on because it's unhealthy.
Is this a seven errors game? Let's assume it is.
1)the child has a bottle before going to bed, which is likely to interfere with his/her sleep 2) the "selfish" nanny, not the parents, sleeps on the same floor as the child 3) the second floor is usually overheated at night, which is not healthy for the child 4) the house is usually overheated at night, which is a waste of energy, bad for your wallet and incidentally the planet (in case you cared) 5) the employer screams her head off at her nanny, which no self-respecting employer allows herself to do 6) the nanny is expected to turn the heat on at night without being asked to 7) the heat is turned down during the day, and up during the night, which makes no sense at all if you have a thermostat - the house should be colder at night than during the day.
What did I win?
Many people like to sleep with the thermostat lowered at night. They say people sleep better that way. Screaming is always wrong so yes, you do owe her an apology, for that if for nothing else and then, perhaps you should take over control of that thermostat in the evening.
I was really hoping this would be a fake post as I cannot imagine a person treating another so disrespectfully.
You are a mean-spirited, cold-hearted woman, OP.
You probably should turn the heat up a bit more ... to thaw yourself out.
WOW.. I just hope your nanny quits soon. Do you have a life? I can't believe you would waste five minutes even mentioning this to your nanny.
Maybe this is a joke..?
If not, you are one miserable bitch.
Nanny, if you're out there, you don't deserve this. Good luck in your search for decent employers!!!
I was under the impression that OP was "done with this blog" when I was reading her 2 follow up comments ha.
In any case, OP, you're freakin nuts woman. I'm normally not this "hold no shit back" type, but since you seem to be that type, I'll let ya see how I really feel. I wish I could "scream my head off" at you for treating anyone, much less someone who shares the same house as you, like you have. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt that the kid was shivering, but hell, put him under blankets while the house heats up. You know, those big pieces of cloth usually with stitching around the sides that are supposed to provide warmth? Yeah, those things- blankes- utilize them.
And believe it or not, it's spring, so it's warmer outside, and heat isn't required during the day. Please note that you let her off EARLY which means it was probably still warmer out when she left, so maybe, just MAYBE she was looking out for YOUR comfort and didn't turn it on, thinking you would get too toasty. Ever thought about that?
As previously mentioned, quit your job, or if you're a stay at home then stop your shopping, and take care of your kid b/c you obviously can't handle someone else doing it, bitch.
Ladies, this woman has no intention of ever admitting she was wrong. She will not admit that she puts the "child" to be with out proper PJ's. Ones that are warm, have feet in them maybe even those very soft warm ones. She doesn't seem to care if her nanny cannot sleep with the heat blowing and she is not allowed to open a window even if she put a rug dwon to stop any cold air from escaping into the hout house. Much less take responsibility for the childs welfare at night by making the kid sleep on another floor?
She plays with the kid about an hour a day and then to be it is ,never goes in to check apparently to see if he is properly covered only if he cries.
I am surprised that the poor kid doesn't have to sleep in the nannies room! What does this childs father think of this kind of situation and parenting??
FAKE!
next.
(the kicker was the thermostat being pushed up to 70*s at night.)
heh.
lindalou
just curious, why was the thermostat "being kicked up to 70°" the reason you cried foul over this post?
My mom actually puts it at 72° and roasts everybody out of the house!
Ugh!
This has to be fake.
OP...you were wrong. The end.
Okay so your nanny was "off duty" yet and you were "on duty" (and thats what it is to you OP huh? duty...) And yet YOUR job of the night is to put your son to sleep, which includes, dressing him and checking the temp, for his comfort...so YOU failed...but somewhere along the line you wanna get off making it the nanny's fault..... I hope she quits and your karma bites you square in the @ss...
oh, but mimi, the daddy put the baby to bed, remember? maybe mom should scream her head off at him, yes?
So what? Your nanny made a mistake. She dosen't deserve to be screamed at. And why the hell does she have to ask to open her window at night? You are treating her like a child. Perhaps you could move your nanny to the guest room on the third floor where she could keep the thermostat set at whatever she wants. Oh yeah, then You'd have to get up with your own child at night. You can't have that.
We welcome nanny stories here, too!
I have to agree with some of the other commentors that this post is most likely fake.
That being said, how come no one has gotten on this mother for not only doing damage to her nanny's peace of mind and her childs health but also contribuiting to our energy crisis and global warming?
Heating your house to 70 degrees at night is grossly irresponsible in terms of the state of our planet. I'm not one of those crazy green people who lecture others about recycling, etc., but there are some pretty simple things we can all do and I think that something as simple as setting the thermostat to 65 or something like that at night (especially when at least one memeber of the household hates to sleep in an overheated house) is a pretty easy thing that everyone could do to contribute to a healthier world.
you lazy bitch turn on your own heat! how disgusting of you... im sure your kids are as nasty as you.
Jane,
When will you do another one of your features? We loved:
http://isawyournanny.blogspot.com/2007/02/worst-nanny-jobs-part-one.html
The worst nanny experience!
I'm not usually very suspicious (in fact, one might even refer to me as "gullible"), but in this case I'm with all the people who are calling OP's bluff. I think s/he is having a great time continuing to play the part of the bitchy employer, but it just doesn't sound realistic.
At any rate, I really HOPE this is false... how dreadful to really be a nanny in that situation!
Op I thought you were done with this blog?
This is so funny it's sad. I hate heat myself. Many times, I foget to turn the heat up and my family wakes up cold at night. But I'll tell you this, since my hisband has learned to dial down the heat he gets less colds than before he met me. You see, it's healthier to live with the heat turned down because dry heated air breeds cold viruses and bacteria better, but I digress.
The family I work for also loves heat (especially the father) He always comments how his bill is so much lower since I started taking care of the kids and guess what? After I leave mom and dad manage to put the heat at the comfort level they wish all by their little selves. The kids could not care less what the heat is on.
So it was SOOOO frigid up there that you didn't notice at all that it was cold until you saw your child shivering?
OP, you sound like an oblivious bitch who makes herself feel better by slamming other people.
I have no words for the disgust I feel for the way you have conveyed yourself in the writing.
Wow lady, you're retarded!! You can't think of the needs of your own child and turn the heat on?! You have to have someone do it for you?
Tell me, does your nanny also wipe your ass for you?
You screw up and then have to blame someone else...
Seriously? You're nuts! And if you're (obviously) so rich then I agree, why don't you set your thermostat to automatically go up at night?? You had no right to yell at the nanny. I would have quit right then and there. I hope you give her an unexpected bonus and an apology.
"unfortunately" this post is true. Anger management classes might be in order for someone, but I cannot say such.
Op, are you for real? You're so lazy you can't stick out your own finger to flip a switch, so stupid it never occured to you that in many places it's colder at night than during the day, and so much of an a$$hole that you have to scream your head off at someone because YOU can't admit to your own mistakes? is your husband banging the nanny, or is there some *other* reason you treat her like chit?
I dunno, you guys think this CUNextTuesday is for real, or is this just a troll posting for our amusement?
I can't believe you were that upset to see your child shiver. My husband likes to sleep in the cold and I wake up shivering all the time. You know what I do? I put on socks and grab another blanket. Guess what? I haven't died from shivering yet. Neither will your spoiled little brat (who will only be a spoiled little brat because you are teaching him where his "place" is... and that appears to be on a pedastal)
OP -- I really think you're just upset that your child woke you up in the night. You're a horrible mother.
Hahahah oh my god. All I could do was laugh as I read this one...I don't even have a comment.
Two comments on the comments:
1) Don't be nasty about her poor little boy. He may well be a perfectly angelic little guy. He's only two and none of this is his fault. I hate seeing the kids attacked.
2) Please don't call people "retarded" as an insult. It's an insult to a lot of wonderful people with developmental disorders.
Lady, you're crazy. It was your job as the mom to make sure everything was perfect for your precious bundle
OP;
"I am dealing with a nanny that doesn't seem to know her place. "
Oh man, you just keep digging yourself into a deeper hole. No employer is justified in screaming her head off at an employee, as you yourself described it. The fact that you admit this with no shame says it all.
I believe there is more to the OP's outburst than meets the eye. Perhaps a fight with the husband? Maybe a bit too much embibement prior to retiring? What turns someone into a maniacal shrew? I think the explosion had been coming for awhile, stewing over the heating bill or maybe the nanny ate her skittles. I'd tred lightly if I were that nanny.
my daughter-in-law always turns the heat up in her house at night. i guess 'cuz the kids are small and they might get uncovered. not sure exactly why, but i know i suffer when i am there.
alright lady... when you have 69 people telling you that you're not only a crappy employer, but a shit mom as well, you have to realize that it's time for help. get laid- anything! maybe if your husband gave you a lil somethin you'll stop being such a bitch.
I hope the nanny quits. OP sounds like an abusive employer. UNBELIEVABLE!
HaHa, fake post or not, I'm lovin' this one.
Love the comments, I see so many of you sticking together.
Somehow, the song, "We are family" is sticking in my head!
LOL
Well, I for one must leap to heatedly defend this poor OP, who obviously is a very busy and important person! My gosh, she DID at least spend time with the child, and 2 whole hours is no small potatoes when you are so important that you can't take the time to check your own thermostat, don't you all think?
I completely understand OP's fury - I mean, she had to actually GET UP and do something to care for the child. Nanny obviously has no idea of her place when she doesn't sacrifice her comfort for the comfort of the child. OP doesn't need to self sacrifice, because OP has nanny to sweat all the big parenting issues.
And OMG, just leave the whole BOTTLE issue alone - that is SO not the point! The child is only 2 - it's not like the child will drink from a bottle for years and years longer. I bet the child will have a sufficiently humble and cowed nanny within a few years and then OP can wean the child at 5 or 6 on OP's schedule, not based on some snotty nanny know-it-all's thoughts!
I have to add that global warming is really off poiint as well - if you're going to warn about warming, at least mention the connection to overheated rooms and SIDS. Because a SIDS related death - that would be all nanny's fault too, don't you see?
OP, you should absolutely charge that arrogant nanny for loss of heat. Why should she be happy or comfy in YOUR house? Does she think she's important to you? What crap! YOU, OP, are important. Not the child, not the nanny, just YOU. And if you choose to have a tantrum over thermostat settings, you have every right to do so!
And anyone who wants to call you unbalanced, overbearing, and possibly insane has the right to say that. Not that I would imply any such thing. I think you are HOT!
I would suggest finding a new nanny, preferably from the tropics - they are used to the heat there, and if you bring the nanny in illegally, she can't exactly go and whine about being "mistreated" to anyone with the sort of POWER you have OP. You just need to adjust your search process to ensure you find a nanny/slave, not the sort of nanny/independent person you have now. Fire her!
I have a 14 month old and we PROGRAM (not ask our nanny to set) our thermostat for 63 at night. He sleeps in fleece footies - used to be a bunting when he was younger and he does not wake up in the middle of the night shivering. In fact, if I put a blanket on him during the night, he kicks it off. My 6 year old and 3 year old were the same way and still hate it when a house is overheated. They complain everytime they go to their grandparents because they keep their house at 72. OP sounds more than a bit looney.
Ya gotta love chick! LOL
You sound like a crazy psycho...so, good luck with that!!!!!
I think this post is a load of BS, personally. The tone is so over the top that it can't be true. HOWEVER......if it is, my gawd.
OP, you need to prioritize. I'm wondering what you dress your child in and what you cover them in at bedtime. Was that not enough to keep them warm?
I totally am with the nanny. Did you not notice the change in temperature? Do you not happen to check the thermostat like most people? Your kid was shivering. It's not the end of the world.
And while we're at it? Why is your 2 year old still drinking a BOTTLE?
I'm betting your nanny writes a tell all about you in the future.
Oh honestly, this is so disgusting! The OP was incapable of turning the heat on for the child by herself? And if the nanny didn't turn the heat on, is "flipping out" and "screaming" at her really appropriate or constructive? Why couldn't the OP just remind the nanny to put the heat on before she leaves in the evening and leave it at that? Sounds like this OP is on a nasty power-trip and just looking for an excuse to be disatisfied enough to unload her temper all over her nanny. She owes her nanny an APOLOGY.
(I hope the nanny quits...I know from experience that employers like the OP will never, ever change).
Fake or real...............I'm still LOL! HaHaHaHaHaHeeHeeHeeHee!
Chick you made me pee my pants!
Fake. Elaborate and weird fake, but fake. The nanny left dinner for "the 2 year old" and then "she was off". The husband dressed the kid for bed at 7:30, not the nanny, so presumably the nanny wasn't back.
Then, how was the nanny able to make a reference the next day to mom and dad and kid being outside without jackets the night before until 7 pm? How would she know?
Whatever. Stupid post.
bc the nanny is a live-in
1:46
It was because this post was written by the (mean) ol' mom, honey, NOT the (mistreated) nanny.
But still, it does reek of FAKE.
Maybe she is usually not off until 6 but got off around 4 so made a trip to one of the places that close before she usually gets off work and then came home...
oh, it's fake. she's trying to present a caricature of a bad employer... nobody cares what's on her 3rd floor.
I am a nanny with 14 years experience working in the LA and NYC areas. If I should tell you about my experiences, you would surely decry, "fake". You would say, "No one acts like that", "No one would say that" and "That doesn't make any sense". Even, "That isn't possible".
So to those of you who think an employer bent out of shape about a nanny not turning on the heat and not taking any responsibility is unlikely, you clearly have no idea. You clearly have never worked in the nanny field! It takes a certain kind of person to bring another person in to their home to mother their child.
Whenever I got off, I would either, dart out to run a pointless errand just to escape or I would go to my room, turn on a white noise machine, lock the door and start drinking. I unplugged my phone, turned my cell phone and shut myself off. I can imagine how this live in nanny saw the family playing- she didn't have the good sense to shut herself away from the craziness the second she was dismissed. Yes, I had an employer, a stay at home mother who would say to me at the end of the evenning, "Dismissed".
the only truly sad thing, is if this post is real; we've upset Mommy Dearest enough that she's going to take it out on Nanny. Whatcha wanna bet she comes up with another concoction of Nanny's ineptitude to make herself feel all justified?
I had a friend who used to yell at her nanny/housekeeper all the time. It was incredibly embarrassing to witness.
Then one day I was at her house and we had ordered some pizza for the kids. I had the misfportune of being the one to open the door when the delivery man arrived. Her kids (ages about 4 and 6 at the time) came rushing to the door and screamed at and berated the delivery man (at length) for taking so long to bring the pizza! The man, who looked to be somewhere in his fifties...which somehow made it seem all the worse to me...just looked at them in complete shock and disbelief. I was totally humiliated and was horrified to think he might think I had been the one to raise such disrespectful kids. So I said to the children, very pointedly, "Go and tell YOOOOUUUR mommy that the pizza man is here."
That's what happens when you don't have any manners. Your kids don't learn to have any either. How could they possibly know any better?
But this lady's housekeepers got her back big time. The first one spilled a trail of food all the way down her hallway carpet, across the living room and into her bedroom. Fearful of the tongue lashing she would receive when the mom got home and saw it, she tried her best to clean it up...with BLEACH.
The next housekeeper, it turned out, robbed her blind...for a decade.
Uhm, maybe the person who wrote this knew you would suggest she should be on the same floor as her child and that is why she explained the layout of her house.
Like seriously, you are all so predictable, I know just how I would have to write a post to meet your approval. If only I could dot my eyes with daisies.
Hahahahhahahahahah Mom.
Why don't people realize that how you treat people is a reflection of just how little class you have.
Truly classy people are kind to everyone, it doesn't cost anything. And if you're rich too start with, what do you have to prove? Especially to some poor sap delivering pizza at age 50? That your better than him? Give me a break.
Are you kidding me? What situation makes you ever think it's OK to yell at your nanny? How gross and classless. SOME people with money just need to get over themselves. I'm so tires of new money.
OP was quite chatty yesterday. I would love to hear how she's feeling now after all of the additional comments, and whether or not she has come to some sort of resolution with her Nanny.
You know what is also so remarkable to me? The two...oh wait...make that three...people I have known who use their wealth as a sign of "class and superiority" (or so they think anyway)all went from average working class women to being wealthy suddenly by marrying rich men.
It's like a huge stick was inserted into each of their "posteriors" as part of the wedding ceremony, because they literally change overnight. I always look at them and wonder, do you realize that the person you are now treating with such disdain for their "station in life" is the EXCACT same "level" (for lack of a better term) of person you were the day before you got married? Suddenly they have no patience for how other people around them are "completely incompetent" in the tasks they require of them and they speak to them (and about them)like they are stupid, naughty children.
I wonder of their husbands are shocked and terrified to see what they have married. (Surely they could not have acted that way in front of the men before the weddings and still expected the ment to want to sign up for THAT, right?)
I would have thought these would be the women with the MOST compassion for other women out trying to earn a living...but instead they are the MOST hateful toward them. Why?
Wacko, crazy, cuckoo, nutso - that's just the nanny for putting up with this kind of behavior. Don't even get me started on the OP...
Good question, Mom.
I had 2 friends marry wealthy men. One turned into the "posterior-enriched" kind, and the other didn't.
I figure their personalities to begin with before they became rich definately had something to do with it.
The one friend always seemed to have a sense of entitlement anyway.
The other was very caring and compassionate ... and she didn't change one bit.
I've been rich and I've been poor. Let me tell you what I have learned, men with small d*cks encourage their wives to act like b*tches. It makes them feel powerful.
whaaa? lol
Hahaha...
One of my friends, who I had met for dinner and drinks multitudinous times before, suddenly one night soon after her marriage got up and ran after the waitress after ordering her drink...as if it was some sort of emergency.
When she got back to the table she explained to me that she had forgotten to order "top shelf" liquor in her drink...and that "ordinary" liquor (which she had been drinking all along for all of the years up to that point)was too hard on her (apparently now suddenly refined and delicate) system.
That was the first indication...and it has gone WAAAYYY downhill from there. Now almost every time we see them my husband asks afterward, "Who IS she?!" And the word "pretentious" is usually the next one out of his mouth. Then he laughs and shakes his head. And he's the kind of person who gives people the benefit of the doubt in most situations and will rarely make an unkind comment about anybody...so I know it's bad when he says something.
I work PT as a bartender and let me tell you, unless you are drinking it straight or on the rocks or unless it is tequilla, in a taste test; you cannot tell topshelf from stock in a mixed drink. The number of people who insist their cosmos are made with grey goose is just pathetic. I mean, who the hell drinks cosmos now anyway?
Hey FACT,
Did you ever consider the possibility that that's WHY their wives are so bitchy? I think there's probably room for a very valid "the chicken or the egg" discussion here...hehehe.
You know, whenever I see a pretentious person I just tell myself what I heard a good friend say once...
"Because she is nothing, she pretends to be something"
Mom you are so right, just because someone graduated college and married rich doesn't make you special or entitled to anything.
I have many wealthy friends and so many are humble and gracious and classy and handle people with a great deal of respect. Some just don't get it.
Your right Socal Nanny. There are crazy but true stories like these posts.
In the past I worked for someone who yelled at me, because I forgot to pick up a jar of Peanut butter. Their bratty kid would only eat the smooth peanut butter with no peanuts. Of all the things I forgot was the Peanut butter. I will never forget how the father, made it seem like the end of the world. I even offered to pick up a jar before I left for the nite. From then on I would buy extra jars and just stash them in their cabinet.
I love oyur quote Jnaet. I'm going to remember it.
You are also right about people. I have frineds (although by "friends" I also include people I see socially but am not personally close to...if that makes sense)and relatives on iterally every rung of the "social ladder"...from welfare to heads of huge corporations. And I'll tell you what...there is little so unattractive as somebody who judges others by their "social standing" or wealth...in either direction.
People who judge other people for being "poor"...Very ugly. People who make ugly comments about the rich for being rich...Equally ugly.
People who can't see other people except by looking at them through their money are some of the most miserable and difficult people to be around.Period.
The greatest, most humble, and down to earth people I know come from all across the spectrum. The worst, most bitter and judgmental also come from all across the spectrum.
People need to stop thinking everybody who is rich is snobby and everybody who is poor is bitter. What a waste not to look any deeper into people than that.
Yikes! I could have used spell check on that last one!
11:16, I drink cosmos sometimes. I'm not a big vodka snob though, so I rarely request a certain kind. However, I can absolutely tell the difference between "house" vodka and Grey Goose. Grey Goose and something like Absolut on the other hand? Not much of a difference, at least not in a cosmo.
I saw someone under the age of 110 order a Manhattan the other day...that was a bit odd to me. I see people drinking Cosmos a lot though.
Eric's mom-yup, I once got reamed out for not picking up bottled water. My (former) boss yelled at me in front of the kids about how I was useless and couldn't do anything right and couldn't control the kids and that I was not a good "servant" (yes, her actual word). I worked for this family for 10 months on salary for 55 hours but actually working up to 85 hour a week with no extra money. I finally quit when they didn't give me a christmas bonus. I was one of their longest lasting nannies! These crazy moms are just insecure b/c the kids love the nanny better, since I put them to bed and woke them up everyday, that then they need to feel powerful in yelling at the nanny about her miniscule mistakes.
OP-hopefully you've stopped posting comments b/c you're too busy finding a new nanny b/c your last one quit and left you high and dry.
so, mom, who paid for that pizza? Is that the real reason you told the kids to go fetch their mama?
Are you kidding me?! You are the child's mother! When your husband dressed the child for bed he should have assessed the temp and dressed your child accordingly, also, you should have turned on your own heat. Maybe your nanny is not comfortable messing with your thermostat for fear of spending too much money. You need to apologize and thank your stars if she doesnt leave you.
Old money families tend to treat their employees very well. They understand the value of loyalty and discretion.
I'm guessing OP is a trophy wife who didn't grow up with household help(or training in good manners).
Dayum, I think 9:26 nailed it!
Hahahaha!!!
I bet you are so right!
Ugh, I hate anonymous!
Too bad we don't know who you are so you can get your kudos!! LOL!
Are you fu**ing serious? how entitled of you. Give the poor girl a break and quit reading malice into her actions. You forgot the heat she probably did too. maybe she woke up cold too. Take some responsibility for yourself and our child.
Fake post...fake, fake, fake! But it sure got the juices flowing, hey girls?
ummhmmm, yes it did!
Who the hell sleeps in 70 degree weather???? 67 is more like it and then I'm still breaking a sweat. might i add that my crazy husband uses a fan too... for the noise. Haha.
Anyways, OP clearly needs her bipolar meds. Need a prescription?
Be nice to your poor nanny. She was thoughtful enough to get a thing for her door to prevent the cooler air coming into the rest of the house. So what If she has an issue with the heat... why shouldn't she? You are gross to even think that she has "a place". Have a heart and treat people nice.
Maybe you should dress your child in a fleece onesie.
Fake?
Are you kidding me?
I heard a story seven times worse just this afternoon. I hear horror stories all the time. This nanny did this. This employer did that. I'm a nanny and I spend a good lot of time trying to eavesdrop. Lord knows staring through the plexiglass at the karate class is not interesting. So thanks to the crazy Karate moms, especially the one who claims she didn't eat anything but peanut butter and water for 5 weeks and she lost 60 lbs. I wouldn't believe it either, but you can't see her when she turns sideways, she's that thin.
While we'd prefer to think this is a fake post because of the treatment of the poor nanny, it's also a fact that there are a lot of very temperamental folks among us. The phone message that Alec angry man Baldwin left for his very own daughter was very creepy and disturbing. He called his own little girl names. When some people "lost it", it seems to be no holds barred.
To those who think this is fake, would you believe that a millionaire heiress beat the shit out of her nanny with a bag of baby carrots because she forgot to clean the counter off?
Google "Main Line Nanny" or "Susan Tepper arrested".
I've been a nanny over 20 years, for every great emploer there are two like this self-centered, egotistical bitch. Fortunately for m I live in an area where nannies are in short supply. So If I encounter a person like this OP I yell right back at her and walk out.
Sorry for the typos, computer was sticking!
Oh yes Bill, we are all aware of the Susan Tepper story!
Point well taken!
If this wasn't a fake story, then the OP is even crazier than her self-reported attitude and behavior in this story demonstrates. How on God's green earth could she possibly imagine she'd find any support or sympathy for the way she treats her nanny and "the child" on THIS blogspot. If she knows enough about this site to post here, she's gotta know she'd be the one to get a big "cyber-beating" from one and all. If she's that clueless, then she's beyond help. I still say... "fake".
hey, bill...
I'm not saying there aren't snobbish, crazy, or cruel employers out there. I just find it unlikely they'd come HERE to complain in the self-righteous way this OP did.
I did have the thought as I initially started reading the post that it was actually the nanny writing about the experience from the perspective of the mom, because the way the mom was describing the incident made herself look so terrible and out of line. That made me think it was nanny, perhaps exaggerating the whole thing to make sure she would get some much deserved sympathy and moral support. But then the way the end of the post was written about the nanny made me think maybe it was actually the mom and she really was THAT clueless.
In any event, it was a good post about an important subject,
I just have to say that this post seems completely believable as a valid post versus a fake.
I have a relative that sounds just like this OP. Always points the finger at others in an attempt to cover up their own misgivings and short comings. It's always someone elses fault why something went wrong and look how much she loves the charge...
She attempts to make those around her look bad in order to glorify herself despite her poor actions and decisions.
So whether this is a fake or not, I find it completely believable. There are those out there that are really that deluded and self absolved.
9:26 put it very eloquently, bravo!
10:10 You're right that a normal, rational person would not have the audacity to treat somebody so terribly and then come here looking for support and agreement from other people. But then, would any normal, rational person treat another person this way at all...EVER?
There really are some people so self centered and narcissistic that they do not see anybody else except in terms of how their presence in the world affects them personally.
I have seen people like this myself, where they are acting so outrageously immature and selfish that you just sit there gaping and thinking, "Do you even have ANY clue as to how terrible this makes you look?" And I really don't think they do.
In law school we met up with a couple where the man was in school with my husband and the woman and I had gone to high school together (although we hadn't known each other)...so we went out a few times. Our interest in them was VERY short lived because the woman was as narcissistic and selfish a person as I have still to this day ever run across in my life. The man was similar...but nothing compared to his wife. But, because they had no other friends (wonder why) they kept on calling us to try to get together (fat chance)...for a few years!(Apparently cluelessness was one of her super powers.) SO, one day she had a terrible car accident, and the first people they called was us (sad, huh?)Her husband even called my husband in advance of her calling me (apparently he was less clueless about our true feelings about them)to tell him that his wife really needed my support at this time. (Seriously, it had been a couple years since we had socialized with them and I was still her "best"...make that only... friend?")But still, I felt bad for her and decided to "be there" for her under the circumstances. So she called me (this is the day after the accident in which she has "nearly died" and had undergone emergency surgery)and the first thing she told me, before describing the accident and her injuries, was that her husband was, at that very moment, picking up BMW brochures for her since she was planning to take the woman who hit her for everything she had...and then she went on to describe how she was going to be living in the woman's house and make the woman her slave/maid, and the woman's husband was going to be her butler. Then she tolds me that she had always wanted a grand piano and that the settlement ought to cover that expense quite nicely. It was nauseating.
Then one day soon after that she called me from the hospital(she was calling me multiple times a day and droning endlessly about her "settlement" or whatever)and announced that she had been thinking a lot since the accident and she had finally made some serious realizations about life, and that she was going to be making some serious changes to her life and the way she viewed things. I thought, "Aha! Finally! The 'I'm going to be a better person and try to give back to the world' perspective that most people seem to gain after a tragedy has finally hit her. Finally, she's going to look beyond herself for a change." Instead, she continued with something to the effect of, "From now on I am going to be looking out for number 1. My life is going to be all about me and what I want and what I need and what makes me happy. Life is short and I cannot afford to waste any more of it on worrying about other people. My happiness is going to be my first priority from now on." HUH!!!!? And boy did she ever make good on that resolution!
It was ALL ABOUT HER in a way that is impossible to even describe. AS she would be on the phone with me I would hear her ordering people around and screaming at the nurses, at her mom, whoever happened across her path. One day she asked mne to hold for a minute and I heard her tell the nurse (who she had buzzed into the room for this purpose)"I want my hair washed now." The nurse said she was busy at the moment but would be back to do it when she had time. The girl said something like, "NO. I want it done NOW!" The nurse again explained that she couldn't do it immediately. The girl had a full on tantrum right then and there which ended with her screaming "Bitch!" at the nurse. Then she came back on the phone and told me what bitches all the nurses were. (Gee, I wonder why they might not have been as nice to her as she apparently thought she "deserved?")Then she told me that her mom was also a bitch because her mom had apologized to another nurse that the girl had berated in front of her and then had the audacity to tell her daughter that her behavior was embarrassing. She said, as though it were perfectly reasonable, that she had told her mom in no uncertain terms that she was not welcome at the hospital again if her attitude didn't change immediately.
I saw the girl only once more after that(on purpose anyway. Can't control who comes to reunions, after all.)She called when she was out of the hospital for me to take her to the mall, because she couldn't drive yet. I told her I would take her but that I had to be home at a certain time because we had evening plans....and that she would have to go to the car wash with me. She agreed. When we got to the mall, she made me carry all of her packages because she was "too weak." Turned out the mall excursion was for her to return all of the gifts people had given her after the accident and convert them to cash. (Gratitude was apparently NOT one of her super powers.)It got late and I said I had to go, but she kept just walking into other shops as we passed, shopping for shoes or whatever. Every time I said I had to get to the car wash she would clutch her belly and say she had to get home because of the pain and could not possibly go to the car wash. I said that was fine but we would have to leave immediately then for me to get her home and me back to the car wash in time. Then her pain would apparently immediatley disappear because she would go on shopping. Finally it was too late and I had to leave immediately and take her to the car wash with me. When I announced that this was what was now going to happen, she clutched her belly dramatically and put on a major performance. I told her that there was now no alternative because of all the shoe shopping...and that if she could prance around in all of those high heeled shoes she had tried on I'm sure sitting on a sofa at the car wash would be fine. Then she said I needed to drive her clear across town to go meet her sister (in all of that "pain"???!!) I told her that I didn't have time. So, we went to the car wash, and while there she called her sister from a pay phone (this was a while back) and told her loudly, specifically so that I could hear, that she could not meet her after all because I was selfish and refused to drive her, and that I had also selfishly dragged her to the car wash even though she had told me that she was in excruciating pain. She held this whole conversation as I sat there in earshot talking about what a a bad friend I was. I was pleasant as ever as I drove her home and dropped her off. I looked at her as she walked off and thought to myself, "Good riddance." And would you believe they called us even after that to get together?! And she had the nerve to ask me to take her on more errands! So no, some people truly have NO CLUE.
Sorry so long. I guess this is just another "mom style" post!
PS At one of the reunions I couldn't help but ask her (because their lifestyle, from what I was overhearing them say, was very far from the "Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous" one she had been planning), "So, did you get that grand piano?" Turns out their settlement was far less of a windfall than they had anitcipated. Aw shucks.
Soon after that they got divorced.
And her husband went through serious disciplinary procedures from the State Bar (for lying in court as an attorney.)
And...a lot of her droning on the phone was about her wanting my help in deciding what screen name she should choose for when she became a famous actress. I have yet to see her miserable little in so much as a commercial.
Will be interesting to see what she has to say for herself at the next reuniion, eh?
mom,
wtf do you DO all day??
what do you DO??????
:(
She comes on here to annoy people like YOU that have nothing better to do!
I disagree about Mom: I don't think she comes here specifically to annoy people.
I think she just does it by accident.
1:21
Did you really think Mom would answer that question and give you more amunition to insult her with?
Why do you care what she does all day? If her posts bother you so much that you would take the time to ask her something like that, then SKIP over them!
1:29 - My comment about mom annoying 1:21 was meant to be a jab them, not her. I enjoy mom's posts.
... there's certainly not much else going on around here right now. At least mom takes the time to post something interesting!
I don't think mom's posts are interesting at all. I think they are boring.
talk about going off on tangents!
and what do you think you're doing right now? hmmm?
right now? I'm hanging out with Mom's husband. He's making some drinks for us. :)
right now? I'm hanging out with Mom's husband. He's making some drinks for us. :)
me too! me too! he's not bad...
I'm always amused when on various forums, someone complains after reading a post with someone's name attached about how boring it was and what a waste of time it was and how that person should "get a life" or "do something productive", yadda yadda. As if someone was FORCING them to read it and FORCING them to respond, and as if what they are doing (reading and posting) is somehow more useful than what they complain about everyone else doing (reading and posting).
Wow. Glad I don't work for that crazy biotch.
1:54 and Sybil @ 1:55,
I'm sure you think you're being so funny right now, but I doubt mom's husband would touch you with a 10 ft. pole.
You smell like fish.
I can't believe certain people have nothing better to do than to come on and TAKE THE TIME to complain about someone's post ... if you found it so boring, wasn't it equally as boring to TAKE THE TIME to post about it?
Sheesh!
Interesting post. I wonder what this mom told her friends about the heat incident. Did her friends lambast her? Or did mom know better than to reveal all in public? The only safe place to reveal all is anonymously on a blog. I just wish OP's nanny could give us a glimpse into life with crazy.
All day? How long does it take you to type five paragraphs? Or did it just take you that long to read it?
lol, cali ... you make too much sense sometimes!
2:41, ROFLMAO!
Thanks for the break in the momentum!
What kind of idiot visits a blog and posts complaints about people..............BLOGGING?
I see mom has wayyyy more friends than foes!
:)
lol @ 2:48
You guys gotta stop! I'm gonna hurt myself laughing so hard!
2:48 comment 1:
Cousins of the people who come to a blog about bad nanny sightings and complain about the bad nanny sightings?
Everyone complained about THIS bad nanny sighting.
This isn't a nanny sighting. It is an employer writing to rant about how she thinks she was wronged. She wasn't. I just read a post about some suspicious "manny" who claims he worked for a family for 5 years and yet he doesn't have a reference and they can't call the employer. I call crap on that. I think the manny was just trying to figure out how many people would buy his story. Either way, neither of these are sightings. It's 3:10 and I am in NY. I've checked in twice today and there is nothing new. So, please somebody rant about something. Ask a question. Rant about me. I've married Mr. Wonderful, we have two beautiful children, I make my own baby food and keep my children on a macrobiotic diet, at the airport I am often mistaken for Julianne Margouiles. I just had my second lunch of the day, fried chicken on top of lettuce, tomato, oranges, onions and cheese. I lost a lot of weight after having my second child and all of my PPG clothing just hangs on me. My metabolism seems to be messed up, but in such a way that I can enjoy food like never before and still slide in to a pair of size 2 slacks. I'm going out to dinner tonight with my darling husband to celebrate his recent market success. Oh, and I'm a sahm with a nanny who I love and adore and who we have a wonderful, mutually beneficial friendship and work relationship.
3:14:
O.k., I'll bite. What are we supposed to rant on you about? Seems to me you got it made in the shade! Anybody who would have something nasty to say about you would just be jealous!
~~~~~~
And to Mom:
Good Lord woman, just look at the traffic jam you caused by that post you wrote! Love it!
xoxoxo
LOL..op..you cannot be serious!
I live in Northern Canada..where it gets very cold! I doubt you can even fathom our winter temps..however...it is YOUR responsiblity once you are home to ensure your child's well being.
You owe your nanny a huge apology...and you owe it to her quick. It wont take long and you will be known to nannies everywhere, and then good luck in finding someone who is skilled and caring to tend to your little one.
Wow...what will happen down the road when junior doesnt bring home all A's?
4:30
I can top that one ...
What about the poor girlfriend Jr. decides to bring home to mom? Do you think for one second this "woman" would like anybody?
I feel sorry for her husband.
(She probably doesn't even give him any).
By George Jane, I think you've got it!
Although I'm willing to go you one further and suggest that the "Angry Inbred" supposition offered in recent days may actually be far closer to reality than any of us could possibly have imagined!
Oh and 1:54 and Sybil @ 1:55,
Sorry but you're not my husband's type.
oh now, Mom, just admit it....
you know you love to stir a bit of s*it on occasion! :-)
Ai-yai-yai-yai-yai!.....I.m beginnin to think we're ALL pathetic! (I'm still reading this stuff!).
Well Sprak...
I have to admit, I do try to stay out of it. But from time to time... especially when there's a big kettle of it sitting right there for the asking...I might just be tempted ;)
hehehehee
I can't keep away myself, this is hilarious!
Mom, I think this Blog should start handing out Awards or something.
I nominate you for "Best Writer" and "Critic's Choice".
LOL ☺
.... oh, the irony!
definitely, "most prolific". Sometimes I sit down with an iced tea and some cookies to take a break and read ONE of Mom's posts! (It's good to know she has a great sense of humor!!)
Mom,
May I ask what state you live in?
Midwest?
Vi,
I'll happily tell you...it's really no secret...but first will you tell me why you guess at Midwest?
Yes, I know I write long posts. But they just sort of spill out of me that way.
For years I have been writing funny little stories about incidents that have happened with my kids as they have been growing ('cause you know what a riot they can be sometimes with their innocent but hilarious comments, unwavering belief that they know EVERYTHING, and eventually hormonally induced, but thankfully temporary insanity.)
They always have started as updates for the grandparents but end up turning into these long, involved minidramas (many of which I have saved and can hopefully turn into something someday.)
I do love to sit and just let it all spill out! But hey, I put my moniker right at the top...anybody who sees it has fair warning that they just might be getting into a long 'un! I have only ever written on this blog...but it is fun, and I have come to really like some of the people in here. I would probably like a lot more if I knew who they were. There are a lot of very clever "anonymous" posters on here. But seeing what happens when one uses a moniker, I don't begrudge anybody the opportunity to keep their head down and out of the line of fire!
Since it's slow and Mom mentioned funny little stories about kids' innocent thought patterns, here's my personal favorite.
Fair Warning: Stop reading now and skip if you don't want to read a tangent.
First a bit of background--one of our favorite family vacations is a place called Gray Rocks in Mount Tremblant Canada. We tend to go in the summer since my husband and I like to golf. One of the fun things the resort does in summer is a barbecue and bonfire on the beach (it's a lake front resort) where they have hoola hoop contests and the kids roast marshmallows. When my daughter was three years old we would pass the firehouse everyday on our way to her daycare and she would always yell out look at the fire engines as we went by. One of the days we went by the bay was open and both firetrucks were gone. She asked Mommy where are they? I answered, I don't know, maybe they went to a fire. She thought about that answer for a bit and then asked, did they bring marshmallows? :)
Mom, I just now finished reading your long story. This sounds like a woman my best friend was "friends" with for awhile, and got TOTALLY suckered by, agreeing to go on "vacation" with the couple for "free" and "help out" with their 3 kids. She has since learned from this experience and has severed all ties with the woman, but that "vacation" involved the fantastic gift of free air miles for her to fly with them to Paris and then be the 24/7 nanny, cook and housekeeper for the entire family for a week plus, including buying a few groceries for THEM (ie, diapers and grape jelly) at her own expense and "lending" them some money at the airport for some emergency payment of some fare discrepancy because the dad claimed he had "forgotten" his credit card or some utter bullcrap. All of which they never ended up paying her back for and she was just too disgusted and pissed at them to even pursue it rather than just never have to hear their voices or see the sight of them ever again. In fact, OP's rant sounds just like something this woman would do. So I guess it really could be for real.
Well Mom, I can't say for certain. I am one who wonders about who is who. I just pictured you in a kitchen that is full of oak. I don't get from you that you have any of the issues that come with trying to be something your not or fit in where you don't belong. I imagine your children went to a regular school. I picture your computer being at a desk that your husband built on to your kitchen counter after you pointed out a design you liked in a home and garden magazine. You don't strike me as someone who gets her hair done by the same woman for some time now. You use a crock pot a lot and although you cook, you don't use a cookbook, but rely on basic good taste and practical measurements. A good dinner out in your town is had at the Olive Garden. You probably don't tell your friends about your posts on the Nanny blog and they probably don't know about it. I imagine you are well regarded in your circle of friends for your kindness and great stories. Should I go on?
Cali Mom- You wear your hair short and color it blond. You wear little or no make up most days, your skin has a pretty good tan year round, but your hair might just be too blond for your complexion, style and age. You like jewelry with pretty beads.
Eric's Mom- You have training in the medical field, possibly as a nurse. You are mesmorized by all that is Oprah and very anti Hilary.
Maggie- You are a very confident, new mother. It is possible you pester your friends with your child rearing wisdom, but that doesn't stop you from telling your friends with 3 and 4 children just how something should be done. I think you probably get your hair and nails done on a scheduled basis and rarely leave home without being "polished". You have a tendency to micromanage your nanny.
MaryPoppins- You are the character Juno- 15 years later. You wear your brown hair in an easily managed, short style. You even cut it yourself some days. You like hanging out in the village, classic rock music and vegan cuisine. You are probably someone who gets involved in issues instead of just talking about them. What is your cause? The Homeless? Gay Rights? Bringing the Troops home? I get a very strong Obama loving vibe from you. Children love you. You are on the muscular side and don't require as much sleep as most people. You will be wearing shorts tomorrow, in fact you already know which pair.
Ro- I get a very strong Chinese vibe. Perhaps you live over a Chinese Food Restaurant or are Chinese or maybe have adopted a Chinese baby. You erase your tracks on the web daily because you are a bit paranoid.
Sprak- From you, I feel a Colorado vibe. Do you live in the wilderness? Your children are either grown or you have decided not to have any. You are perhaps a writer or an artist, someone has the time to pause online. I see you sitting in a room, perhaps a home office where you surf the net and eat cracker jacks. Maybe you have a cat or two and are either married or divorced from a truck driver.
Kate- you are a God loving woman who feels her calling is to raise other people's children. You are strict and practical and rarely lose your cool. You are not overly emotional and rarely hug people. You grew up with several cats and a dog.
Lorenza- You wear your hair naturally, in a very well coiffed Afro. Your round, proud face does not reveal that you are in your fifties. You take a great deal of pride in your nanny daughter and you talk to your daughter on a daily basis. Your home is decorated with paintings of river scenes.
JerseyXJacqui - You spend a lot of time online at sites like MySpace and Facebook. You have probably met a number of contacts that way. Your current employers weren't sure about you when they hired you, but you blew them away with your efficiency, energy and loving nature. As a child, you owned a beagle.
So Cal Nanny - Your parents never expected you to work as a nanny. You are educated to some degree and have some undefined talent that could lead you into another field, if you would let it.
You like to hike, wear cargo shorts and have very white teeth. Your favorite holiday is Thanksgiving.
Well, that's all I got...
Cute, 8:19!
One of my "Kid's say the darnedest things" moments:
My son used to be really impatient any time we had to wait for longer than several minutes.
One time we were standing in line to pay for some groceries and he was starting to complain that it was taking too long. I took the opportunity to explain to him that we must wait our turn, and that "patience is a virtue".
Several days later, we had to wait once again, this time at a Drs. office. He was just about to get a little restless, but then right at the same time the Nurse called us in to see the Dr., and I was saying, "you need to relax" ... he says: "I know, I know, patience is a Virgin"!
I know I turned 3 shades of red, and wished right there I could fall off the face of the Earth!
.... but to my surprise, the Nurse (and several other Patients, I might add) .... just started laughing hysterically!
This story has now been spread through the entire Family. And my Father, who's a College Professor, actually used it in one of his speeches! Needless to say, it was a winner with the Faculty and Students!
As much as I would love to rant about fried chicken on lettuce and tomato, because it sounds far too healthy for someone who loves biscuits and gravy with Fritos on the side; I would just end up having to admit that I am indeed jealous. In retrospect… I understand now why I don’t fit into those size two jeans anymore.
So here is my rant:
I have been fortunate enough to have been blessed, in my younger years, with an infection as a result of over use of vinegar and water female cleansing solutions. This prevented my “could be” children from properly navigating into the correct nesting area.
As some of you have surmised, I have had 3 tubal pregnancies and I often tell my friends, to lighten the mood, that my children inherited my poor navigational skills and just keep getting lost, it wouldn’t surprise me if they inherited my poor depth perception as well. I have also been through chemotherapy and radiation as a result of a soft tissue Sarcoma that attempted to birth itself on my leg and now it’s highly unlikely I will ever have the chance to have my own children. Please don’t feel sorry for me… it’s life at it’s best.
However, I do have a step daughter whom I love as if she were my own. I just had the fortune of skipping the birthing process and the whole “I hate you” stage and went straight into the young adulthood phase. She now has a miracle baby of her own, (she too went through cervical cancer and only had half a uterus) which I also love as if she were my own grandchild.
My young girlfriends have children as well so that gives me 8 wonderful children and one grandchild that I never had to give birth to but have the pleasure of loving and raising as if they were my own. I am expected, and it is demanded, that I treat those children as though they were my own and expected to punish them and praise them when punishment and praise is due. I am expected to instill the knowledge of the difference between right and wrong.
All 8 of these children, including their mothers, love and respect me. They look up to me, they love to love me and equally love to hate me. They all look at me when they know they have done wrong, knowing full well that the dreaded “look” and “lecture” is coming.
As I’ve read through this site I have seen questions posed to folks on whether they have children or not. It is bothersome to me that it is assumed that if someone has not given birth to a child, they “don’t understand” or they “don’t have the right” to have an opinion or give comment in one direction or the other.
As an adult who has been through a lot of life’s lessons, is it not my responsibility to take responsibility for those children? Not just “my” children (as my friends like to say) but for all the children on this earth? Is it not my responsibility to pass down what little wisdom I do have and to teach them the difference between right and wrong? As a member of the Earth community, is it not my responsibility to speak out when a child’s safety, health and well being has been compromised?
Because I have not been blessed with the ability to pop children out of my oven, means that I have no right to provide an opinion on what I feel is right or wrong?
There… now on to that fried chicken with lettuce and tomato… is there fries with that?
BTW… mom, keep writing. You should put those talents to getting published.
Well, now I feel all left out. :-(
Am I vibeless, Vi?
Vi,
I don't know about the others, but I must say your account of me was pretty close. I guess it wouldn't hurt to admit to a few inane details.
One of the main things that you did get wrong was my hair. It isn't "short and sassy", lol. It is long and tedious. But there is a reason for that, which brings me to your guessing that I have a passion for certain issues.
I have been growing my hair for "Locks of Love". It is an organization that makes hair pieces for children that cannot grow their own hair due to sickness or cancer. It must be at least 10 in., and mine is 22 in.
I would love for a little girl to have hair past her shoulders, if possible.
I am also involved in my my son's school as a Tutor, and a few other local things that you did mention.
I am also vegan, lol. And yes, I survive on approximately 5 hrs. of sleep a night ... no matter how hard I try, that damn alarm on my body clock keeps going off!
noturavgmom
Bless you for telling us your story!
Mary Poppins- I love the locks of love idea. I wish I could grow my own hair long and do the same, but I've never been able too; it's just bad hair. Brittle and breaking.. What a wonderful thing you are doing. I was only have serious, but now I feel like I just might have my Aunt Serena's skills.
Noturavgmom,
Children don't need to be your own to be called your own. We no longer can say we "don't choose our families". I chose mine and it is anything but the usual. I appreciate you sharing your story. One of the things I feel people lack nowadays is gratitude. Everyone is always complaining. People complain if their internet goes out for 15 minutes. That blows my mind.
Chick,
I left a few people out. Thanks for caring. Of course you have a vibe.
half serious, not have serious.
Maybe the botox is seeping in to me brain. (!)
I do believe some people are more "in tune" than others. You certainly came within walking distance of me, Vi. And I am particularly impressed because I prefer to reveal so little about myself.
I would like to hear from the others if you guessed anything right about them.
That ought to be very interesting!
This is so nice! It's been a long while since a bunch of us have been able to feed a blog without insulting each other!
Congrats to all of you!
Awww thank you all... I actually had to pause for a moment from your nice comments and found myself in tears... don't tell my children that, they don't think I cry.
ummmm... meant "they think I don't cry".
Either way, your post was lovely. People who love children and animals are generally very good people indeed.
vi,
re: "Ro- I get a very strong Chinese vibe. Perhaps you live over a Chinese Food Restaurant or are Chinese or maybe have adopted a Chinese baby. You erase your tracks on the web daily because you are a bit paranoid."
Way off. Although I have been hitting the Asian Fusion Joint pretty hard this month.
I LOVE the cute kid stories!
Calimom, I wonder if we are talking about the same woman. Mine tried every which way possible to worm money out of me...as she and her husband did with everybody they possibly could.
The frist time we went out with them they ate like pigs and then when the bill came announced that they were going to come up short, and could we cover the difference, because they needed to hold some money back for snacks at the movie. Then at the movie they ordered super size everything and borrowed more money to cover that, and never made any attempt to return the money. It wasn't a lot, but we were all struggling students at the time, so every $5.00 made a noticeable dent in our budget.
The did the same the next time we saw them...so I started bringing "just enough" cash to cover our bill after that.
We began hearing murmurs around the school that the husband would eat out with the guys and, when the bill came would never offer to pay even his portion, but always said, "You get it this time and I'll get it next time." But next time never came.
Then we went shopping one day and she brought a bunch of stuff to the counter and asked for me to write the check for hers because she had an out of town check, which she said the store wouldn't accept. We both lived out of town, and the check I had successfully used to buy my things was an out of town check also...which I pointed out to her. Then she tried to tell me that it would just "be easier" if I went and wrote a check and she paid me back. Huh? We went back and forth several times, and when she realized I was not going to pay for her stuff she said she didn't want it after all.
Another time we went to a department store and she brought her purchases to the counter and asked me to pay for them because she had forgotten her store credit card. I told her it was no problem, because a store would happily look up her account number so she could charge her own items.
She insisted that it wasn't true...that it would be "easier" if I just paid for them...again, anything and everything she could think of to get me to buy her stuff. Finally I walked over to the counter and asked the woman there to look up this girl's account number. Once the clerk had successfully located the account number, the girl looked over the stuff and decided she didn't want to buy it after all.
We went to eat once and she announced before we walkd in that she had put her purse in the trunk of my car (after she had asked me to open the trunk so she could put it there!)so it would be easier if I just paid for lunch and she paid me back. We were still standing by the car, so I said, "I'll just open the trunk." She tried every which way to convince me that it would be "easier" if I just paid the check, rather than going to all the trouble to pop the trunk. It was almost comical watching her think up lame excuses about why I should not pop the trunk when we were standing right next to it arguing. She huffed off after I insisted she take her own purse.
We went into a little frozen yogurt shop once and she ordered a teeny tiny child size cup of yogurt...which she ate in three bites. Then she went up to the guy at the counter, handed him the empty cup and said, "Put some more in here." The poor guy (a teenager) looked at her confused and asked her if she wanted to buy another yogurt. She said, "No. Just put some more in here." He told her he couldn't do that unless he charged her for a another yogurt. Ironically, I think she told him he ought not be so stingy. Naturally, because she was a brat, she let the poor kid have it. I was glad to see that he held his ground. She huffed out of there mad too.
(Now you can probably see why our interest in them was so short lived.)
Vi, noturavrgmom and MPP,
I love the "getting to know you" posts. Great idea Vi! But Vi, let us hear more about you too! I want to hear from everybody who is willing because it would be fun to "know" you all better. I too, wonder about the people who write here and have formed ideas as to what some of you might be like. It would be fun to really know for sure.
I agree with the others here that you sound like a great person noturavrgmom, with a fantastic outlook. Bless your heart. And it is true that a child to love is a child to love...and it doesn't matter where they come from ;)
Now I will take a stab at answering your "vibe" about me. I think you got the general sense..although I have "evolved" a lot over the past tewo decades, so some of it was more true of the old me and some more of the new me,if that makes any sense.
You wrote:
"Well Mom, I can't say for certain. I am one who wonders about who is who. I just pictured you in a kitchen that is full of oak. I don't get from you that you have any of the issues that come with trying to be something your not or fit in where you don't belong. I imagine your children went to a regular school. I picture your computer being at a desk that your husband built on to your kitchen counter after you pointed out a design you liked in a home and garden magazine. You don't strike me as someone who gets her hair done by the same woman for some time now. You use a crock pot a lot and although you cook, you don't use a cookbook, but rely on basic good taste and practical measurements. A good dinner out in your town is had at the Olive Garden. You probably don't tell your friends about your posts on the Nanny blog and they probably don't know about it. I imagine you are well regarded in your circle of friends for your kindness and great stories. Should I go on?"
My kitchen is all wood, from floor to ceiling, but mostly maple, with a dark walnut island. (But I did specifically choose the kitchen out of a magazine--good guess there!)I actually don't care much for Oak because the grain is too rough for my taste. My favorite "style" tends toward the country French look and you would not say my house is either casual or formal...but you would not say that it is NOT either of those things either. Does that make sense? I like neutral greens and beiges as an overall scheme but have splashes (at minimum)of red in every single room.
My computer is in my "art room" on a long granite counter. My kids' computers are on a long counter directly behind me. This sunny (light yellow)room with lots of windows is where my kids and I spend a lot of our time. I was a an artist (in my "former" life...Pasadena mom will probably know the art school I attended in the hills overlooking the Rose Bowl)and I have this room stocked from top to bottom with art supplies for my kids (because when I was a kid, any art supply that I could get my hands on felt like Christmas.)
If my husband had made my desk I would probably be sitting here with a lap full of wood and splinters by now...heheehe. I stopped asking him to do those kinds of chores back when he installed a towel bar for me and forever after that I had to hold the bar tightly in place while gingerly removing my towel, lest it fly off the wall at me!
My kids attended public school all through elementary school. The public jr. high and high schools had issues we were not willing to put our kids through, however, so we moved to private after that. Although, being that my husband and I both think kids should have time to be kids, we steered clear of the intensely competitive/pretentious prep schools in the area and opted for a more "normal" type school environment. It seems to have worked out great so far. My feeling is that they have a whole lifetime to run in the rat race and only one small opportunity to be kids.
Thank you for the extreme compliments about not trying to be what I'm not and my friends probably thinking well of me. I sincerely hope that both of those things are true! I'm not a huge storyteller in public, and am, in fact, fairly shy...although once I get comfortable with somebody its a different story. But I do send out those e-mails with the funny kid stories and my friends do write back and ask that I keep them coming. I have tons of people I would call "friends" but who I really only see at gatherings or business functions, etc. I am more of the "a few very close friends" type of person. The most consistent thing I have heard my friend say to describe me as a friend is "Loyal." If you are my friend I will not talk about you, will never share one of your secrets with anybody, and will be there for you need somebody.
I used to be "Queen of the Crockpot" so good guess there. Now I cook less...but I do it by the "that looks about right" method you guessed I would. When we eat out with the kids we tend toward a few small local spots (we're in a small suburb.)With friends or "on a date" we like to try different places around Dallas. We're not into really trendy places, but love a long relaxed dinner with friends in a cozy place. Olive Garden is a very rare occurence...maybe once a year...although we used to eat there a lot more when the kids were small.
The same lady has been doing my hair for years. Not necessarily because I'm totally thrilled with her (alhtough I really was for a long time), but because after all of this time I can't bear to hurt her by changing. I do my own nails (but I keep them done nicely at all times...painted toenails and natural, unpainted fingernails)...it's easier, quicker, and I don't want to get a nasty fungus or MRSA (that ought to tell you something about me right there.)
And you're right that my friends don't know about my ISYN blogging. A few do know I like to blog on a "certain site" though.
I am tall, blonde and fairly thin (despite exercising rabidly in an effort to keep in good enough shape to keep up with my fanatical karate habit.)Our whole family does karate together. People tell me I look like two different (but obscure)"famous" people: Wayne Gretskys wife and the woman who had sex with Patrick Swayze all over the place in the movie "Roadhouse." (How embarrassed I was to hear that for the first time...because it came from a man at church...who I was never able to look fully in the eyes again!) But those two I have heard consistently...for years...so they must be at least somewhat accurate.
Now for your original question: I live in Texas, but was born in the midwest and raised in California at the beach (and still consider that my "home.")Somehow I still seem to have the values of my midwestern relatives, so that is why I was curious as to why you thought me midwestern.
I have to run and take care of a few things because we have two major events happening here tonight and I am VP in Charge of Clothing and Corsages! But later, if she has not given us her bio or Vi hasn't taken a stab at it, I am going to give my guess as to Chick's personality. (Don't want anybody left out!)
Have a wonderful day ladies!
Mary Poppins, I love that you contribute to "Locks of Love". How wonderful of you to do that.
It was an incredible growth and discovery process for myself going through cancer treatment and watching the children who were also going through treatments.
I cried for them and would have given my life in exchange for theirs because the look on the parents faces were so heart breaking. But then I realized that my own mother was feeling the same thing, it didn't matter that I am an adult.
The children gave me the will to survive. As a Sarcoma patient, it's quite one thing to be going through it as an adult, but watching all the children was more heartbreaking than my own situation and I realized that I had already given up and welcoming death before I had put up a fight.
I feel for all cancer patients, but the children are who move me the most, they have not even begun to live yet and having to fight for life at such an young age.
You're doing wonderful things Mary Poppins. All of us cancer patients thank you for your efforts.
This blog is supposed to be about child abuse...not about the heat! Give me a break! This is why I will never be a live in, it is ridiculus how selfish people can be!
1:36
I agree that the purpose of this Blog is about Child Abuse, but I also think it's a great forum for others to get out how they feel.
Why should there be a strict outline of what is allowed here?
A lot of us have said from time to time that being a Parent (or a Nanny) is a learning process. No one is perfect. And I admit to having learned so much from this Blog myself.
This site serves many needs ... and one of them is it makes it possible for a Nanny to get a lot of issues out in the open, where she can get advice from others. It's an excellent sounding board.
It also helps the Parents/Employers because most are wanting to do the right thing by their Nanny, and there isn't a book that tells them what kind of Christmas bonus is appropriate after 5 yrs. of loyalty, or how they should tell their child that the Nanny they love is leaving for College.
Then of course, you have the posters like this one .... who don't seem to have a clue about how to treat their Nanny. In this case, all we can do is keep our fingers crossed and pray that after she reads this thread, she gets a conscience and decides to be a little kinder to her Nanny.
awww Vi! I get no vibes?
Looks like vi needs to hook up chick and mimi!
But you have to let us know how close she is!
OP, if everyone is saying you acted poorly then face up to it you did!
Noturagvrmom, you are awesome!
Vi, I actually have long, very dark brown hair that I sometimes dye darker. :) But I don't usually wear makeup and my skin tone is somewhat dark and tans very easily. I've been told by doctors that I should be much more thorough with using sunscreen. And I do like pretty beads.
Mom, I don't think this woman is the same but your aquaintance sounds absolutely REVOLTING! This woman was someone my friend and i knew when we were in grade school and she was a pushy, bossy child back then that I didn't like to play with, and then my friend ran into her again in later life and "rekindled the friendship" with her and really regretted it. The same people had some situation in Italy AFTER my friend's experience in Paris where they told their nanny that she could either improve her attitude immediately or they would take her straight to the airport, as if that was some sort of a threat, and she demanded they take her straight to the airport immediately, LOL! So they were left in Italy with their own 3 children and no household slaves to satisfy their every need and I bet they were WAY pissed about it!
Someone, please tell me this is a joke...I am a stay at home mom and maybe this person should become one too....OR maybe not....This is the MOST ridiculous thing I have EVER read on this site...You have got to be kidding me!!!!!!
UNBELIEVABLE...It is YOUR house AND YOUR child.
Vi
I feel so left out.
What's yer vibe on me (dare I ask?)
I think vi pooped out, she ain't giving anymore psychic readings, lol.
I thought it made for fun reading!
Post a Comment