Received Wednesday, February 6, 2008-Perspective & Opinion
I was writing to see if I could get some advice on how to deal with vacations and my family. I'm a nanny of 6 months, and within the first 2 months of my job my family took me on a trip with them. Granted, it wasn't really a vacation, but to go to an extended family members wedding across the country. Those 5 days registered as some of the worst 5 days of my life. The kids were still "testing" me because I was new, so they pushed all of my limits and acted atrocious, and the parents had me with the family at ALL times. I was also incredibly sick with a cold, and at a family function where I knew no one and felt completely awkward and out of place. Granted, I was compensated monetarily and very nicely at that, but I feel that the boundaries were pushed. This family is very well to do, and they asked that I not only share a room with the kids, but a bed with one of the children. At the time, I was incredibly annoyed, but didn't think there was much to do about it. Now I know that on a regular basis, the children sleep with the parents at home. I don't understand why they couldn't have at least made one of the children sleep with them so that I could at least have my own bed. I had also specifically asked for an aisle seat on the plane because I get incredibly sick on them, and they stuck me in a window seat in a 3 seat aisle, smothered by one of the children and the father. The only alone time I was granted was 1 extra hour on second to last morning to sleep in while they went to eat breakfast. I think they finally realized I was completely drained, and more sick than when we first came b/c obviously I didn't get a chance to rest. As you can see, it was a horrible trip, and I can't think of one joyful moment. At home the family is incredible. I love the children so much I could burst, and the parents are so willing to help me and offer advice. I really do appreciate them. I just don't think vacationing with them is such a good idea anymore. This summer they'll be spending a vast amount of time at their summer house which is a good distance from our normal residence. They've asked me to spend 2 weeks with them, which I really don't have a choice in. I'm really concerned about how to handle it, and how or IF to talk to the parents about it. I know that not only will I be there, but 7 members of their extended family, and another guest or two, will be staying there. Do I have the right to ask for my own room? I don't want to get stuck sleeping in the children's room (again) but it's a possibility with this many people. All of the other guests already have designated rooms, but I don't think I do. I've asked and the reply was that they don't know where to "put" me yet. How do I voice this concern? And what should I do to ensure I don't spend another two weeks feeling suffocated and miserable?