Received Friday, December 28, 2007
On Turs, 12/27 in New York City....west side of the street, East Third Avenue between 69th and 70th. Around 5 p.m., I saw a young white female child, about two to two and a half with pink woolen hat in black stroller screaming. Nanny, a thirtyish pretty Black woman with two black children ( perhaps girl of 8-9, other child thin boy or girl about 12-13) walking beside her. They stand staring in a store window while the baby screams and screams. No one pays attention to her. She starts to yell " I don't want to wear my hat." She keeps screaming and the nanny ignores her. People start to stare. The baby removes her hat, still screaming. Finally the nanny grabs the hat, puts it in the child's lap , pulls the child's jacket hood onto her head ( beige with white lining) and zips up her jacket into her neck with enormous anger. Nothing is said to the child. I followed them as I felt surely the child's neck was caught in the zipper. They crossed the street going East at 70th. My heart broke for the little child.I could only wish the parent(s) could see how their baby was being treated/neglected.
16 comments:
the child was throwing a hissy fit about not wanting to wear her hat and the nanny was ignoring this? i think she did the right thing-you can't get sucked into a child's tantrum!
I agree you should not encourage a tantrum, and at least the nanny made sure the child had a suitable substitute (the hood) when she removed the hat, but the zipper should not have been closed with enormous anger. A childcare provider should not allow a child's tantrum to cause her to lose their own composure. Sounds like she needed to take a few deep breaths before addressing the child.
This doesn't sound bad. She was ignoring a temper tantrum, yet made sure to keep the child appropriately dressed/warm for the duration of the temper tantrum. She shouldn't have talked to the girl, you can't reason with a child during the temper tantrum, you have to wait for them to calm down. Sheesh, you should have kept walking, but instead you probably stared which just added fuel to the little girl's fire.
Ignoring a two yo throwing a tantrum is exactly what the "experts" advise, as long as they are in a safe place, which the child was. If the nanny was rough that is bad, but I think maybe the OP is exaggerating. I bet everyone who has lived through the terrible twos has lost their cool at some point. there is nothing wrong with letting a misbehaving child know you are annoyed.
RE:
A childcare provider should not allow a child's tantrum to cause her to lose their own composure. Sounds like she needed to take a few deep breaths before addressing the child
well
You must be single. Wait until you have kids. When you do and your child is in that age bracket let us know if you always kept your composure.
People always stare when a child is acting up or crying.
Ignoring a two year old's temper tantrum =GOOD.
Reacting angrily (if she actually zipped her neck into the zipper and left her like that)= BAD.
Losing your cool a time or two in the face of relentless toddler screaming but NOT becoming abusive as a result = FORGIVABLE.
I'm pretty sure of 2 things. 1), that it's pretty freaking cold in NYC this time of year, so a child NEEDS to have her head covered. 2)that if a 2 year old's neck was cqaught in a zipper she'd be screaming bloody murder and shrieking in pain, NOT just yelling that she didn't want to wear her hat.
So, a nanny made sure her charge was appropriately dressed for the cold and ignored the nosy hanger-on and the irrational tantrum being staged by the child.
Where's the problem?
I agree 500% with cali mom nothing wrong with this AT ALL!
The nanny did the right thing. She replaced the hat with a hood and ignored the tamtrum. Just what I would of done.
Are you seriously making this a discussion. The fact that these poor children have to have other people raise them is sad! Maybe you uppity mother's should spend less time shopping and more time with you kids!
To 9:30 am, if there were no households with two working parents (or one working single parent), there would be no nannies, and therefore no I Saw Your Nanny Website. This is not a Stay at Home vs Work website. It would be "I Saw Your Momma" website. I am sure there are websites for stay at home parents to find support, friendships and playdates that will satisfy you. Good luck!
Kudos to upstate mom for handling the trouble maker that posted at 9:30 so well.
Keep patting yourself on the back ... cause nobody else will.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
she who shall not be named
9:30
Why don't you get off the computer and go do some volunteer work to benefit children. You are not helping anyone here.
I am a mom and think the nanny behaved as any human would. She ignored the negative behavior, made sure the child's head was covered and let the child know that the undesired behavior was not pleasing.
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