Monday

Duke vs.Georgia Tech Game in Durham, NC

Received Monday, November 12, 2007- Father
I was at the Duke vs Georgia Tech college football game this past Saturday, (11/10) and while there I saw a man with his young son there, only about 9 months old. The men's restroom didn't have a changing table, so he asked a random girl to change his sons diaper. I was waiting outside for a friend when this happened. A woman who was leaving the restroom offered to do it as the girl he had asked couldn't have been older than 15 or 16 years old. I am just not getting why he would ask a complete stranger to do that. There is no way to know if that lady was a pedophile, or some crazy lady, who could have done who knows what to your son. Both man and child had black hair, sorry but that is all the details I can remember. If this is your man, tell him not to do that again. Instead utilize what is around, such as a bench, to do the deed.

45 comments:

Anonymous said...

i'm sorry, but this is frickin' hysterical.

Meme said...

I'm sorry. This guy was probably a great dad, but men can really be so clueless. It's frightening. I, personally, would KILL my husband if he did something like this, but this post does not surprise me at all.

cutefemmegirl said...

I shudder to think what could have happened to this poor baby. What must people be thinking these days to trust a complete stranger to change your baby? Bad Daddy!

Anonymous said...

meme:
are you mental? This guy was not a great dad. A great dad does not let a stranger, male or female, take their infant into a restroom.
Get a clue, meme.

Anonymous said...

why are men so not with it!!!...come on she could of hurt this baby... brains...
this guy is a great guy!!!...he is just like giving hulk hoogan the father of the year award... ( oohhh yes he got it) his son ( 17) had 4 yes 4 speeding tickets in less than 1 year and this great dad bought his son a faster sports car. which he crashed and put his friend in a coma.so now this idiot is hopefully going to jail for a very long long time...
so moms wake up shake your husbands..and to all the lucky ones that have a good one ..give him a big kiss when he comes home tonight

Anonymous said...

Oh, I don't think he's a horrible dad. This sounds like something my dad would have done. He probably thought the baby was safe enough if he stood outside the restroom and waited. Of course, this was a stupid idea. While I doubt the person would have hurt the baby, if there had been an exit on the other side of the restroom, she sure could have taken it.

Anonymous said...

Glad to see family restrooms in a lot of places now. There should be a changing table thing in the men's room also.

Anonymous said...

Don't come down so hard on this guy. He probably just wanted to go to the game and his ball buster of a wife told him he had to take the baby. The nine month old baby. So she could do what?

Meme said...

3:34...I meant a great dad in general terms, but in things that moms would think are common sense men are often clueless. I think in his mind, asking a woman to do this for him was a reasonable and safe alternative, although to most of us (women) this is insane behavior.

And further more, since the definition of "mental" is "of or pertaining to use of the mind or intellect," per Websters, then I suppose I am, in fact, mental. Thanks for noticing.

Anonymous said...

I think the point is that there should be changing tables in both men's and ladies' room.....or family room as someone wrote. The father made a foolish decision, which hopefully worked out fine. I had a similar dilemma once when I took my 7 year old niece to a sports arena. I am a woman, so we went into the restroom together, but not in the same stall! I was petrified until I got out (having given her rules about staying in front of my stall when done, etc...). The woman in line behind me told me afterwards that she too kept an eye on my niece. Some are nice, but I was still worried.

Anonymous said...

I agree it was a tricky situation for the dad. And seriously you know if he would have changed the baby on a bench than someone would have ranted about it on this site and called him a horrible dad for that. So, no it was not a smart decision but he was in a tough position and dads don't really think about those things.

cali mom said...

5:07, are you one of those sperm donors who think that changing a diaper is "womwen's work" and being responsivble for your own child for 15 minutes at any point after their birth is "babysitting"?

Or are you just married to one of those guys?

I suppose i shouldn't be that surprised that some fathers are so clueless and careless when it comes to childcare, but I am. I thought that type of male ignorance went the way of the electric typewriter back around 1978, but I guess 5:07 is a piece of living history.

Meme said...

There really should be family restrooms or at least changing tables in all restrooms anyway. Bottom line. Then no one will have to worry about how stupid their husband might be.

mom said...

The dad was nice enough to take the baby to the game. He made a big mistake. When he got home and mentioned to his wife what he had done, she undoubtedly set him straight. But I am sitting here wondering just exactly where he might have changed the baby that wouldn't have been offensive or unsanitary. They need to have facilities for baby changing at stadiums since lots of dads like to take thier little guys to the game.

Anonymous said...

I'm sure 'dumb daddy' didn't admit to wifey what he had done. He probably doesn't think it was too big of a deal because he had a female go in there and do it for him. But sadly ... woman can be just as much a pedophile as men.

Anonymous said...

I agree with Meme and mom. They should make changing areas more available in mens rooms, etc. And thank goodness he didn't change him on the bench. Gross, I would want to sit there after.

mom said...

Doesn't the post say that there was no changing table in the men's restroom? Sounds like he went in with the intention of changing his own child's diaper, but didn't find a place he could do it. Most likely he asked a woman to do it because they do have changing tables in the women's restroom, rather than because he secretly has a deep seeded hatred of all womankind and gets untold pleasure from demanding that they serve him. People need to stop looking for the worst in everybody. Not everybody is out to oppress one or another segment of the population.
I suspect that he may have told his wife that he was inconvenienced by the fact that they have no changing tables in the mens room.

Anonymous said...

I can't for the life of me figure out why this behavior is being defended. What if God forbid something bad had happend? I think you're all a bunch of idiots: meme, mom, moomoo whatever you're just so dumb. In this day and age, it is NOT OK to entrust a stranger with your child, wherever WHENEVER whatever the situation.
Geez what a bunch of dumbasses.

mom said...

I don't see anybody defending him, except that one really stupid comment at 5:07.
He did a bad thing.
But the extenuating circumstances help some of us glean that he is probably not a vicious monster, but just a hapless dad who got caught in a tricky dilemma and did the wrong thing.
My husband loved to take our kids on little individual outings. But, being as he was used to me doing most of the caretaking while he was at work all day, he wasn't as adept at handling certain things. Every now and then he would come home and innocently tell me about some boneheaded thing he had done (including losing my three year old for what he described as "several minutes" at a major league baseball game.) While my first internal instinct was usually to crucify him on the spot, I would bite my tongue long enough to remember that he was doing his best to be a good dad and spend time with the kids...which I wanted him to feel comfortable doing. I would them just explain to him why he should never, EVER do whatever it was again. He would then understand and not do it again. If you treat dads like they are incompetent with their own kids, and make it uncomfortable for them, they might sort of give up on spending time alone with them. Dad wants to feel he is just as much a parent as mom. It's a fine line.

Anonymous said...

We should all complain to venues that don't have changing tables available to men. They should be standard equipment in restrooms, but it isn't going to happen unless they are aware of the demand.

pasadenamom said...

honestly, i don't see the big deal! while at the park with my son, i have been asked by many other moms, grandmas, etc. to keep an eye on their little one while they had some quick thing to do. i guess they must trust me seeing that i am a mom too. what about when someone asks you to keep an eye out on their shopping bags while they go get a drink from the soda fountain. i truly have no problem with showing others a kind and sincere act. now, would i trust some one to do the same for me, where my child or shopping bags are concerned?- not-so-sure.(unless the person was a friend or something.

my point is that there are "good" ppl out there in this sad excuse of a world we live in today. just like there are "good" nannies.

i'm glad someone was kind enough to change that baby's dirty diaper. worse case scenario, the dad could have let the baby sit through the whole game with a dirty diaper, which i assume would only have resulted in the worst rash ever.

*nice ppl do exist*

^_^

Aunty Rhea said...

While this wasn't the best thing to do, it sounds like a tricky situation.

And it says that he asked a teenage girl first. Maybe he saw there could be a danger in asking a strange adult, and thought a teenage girl would be more trustworthy.

I feel bad for the dad in this situation. Here he is trying to have fun with his baby, and not change him in public (pedophiles would LOVE that), faced with a pretty tough choice. So he did something most women wouldn't do... it's over with.

And sadly, I think it will take a woman hurting someone elses baby to open everyones eyes and put diaper stations in mens restrooms as well.

Anonymous said...

I'm the woman who took the baby into the rest room.

I certainly didn't know what to do with the screaming thing, so I placed it on the floor while I took a dump, and then gave it back to the dad when I got out.

Anonymous said...

I could see if he had asked a mother with a child, but to ask a teenager? Who knows if she has ever held a baby, let alone changed ones diaper. I do agree that there should be changing stations in the mens room, as believe it or not men do change diapers.

Anonymous said...

I wanted to point out that at stadiums you should consider going to the first aid station if you need to change a diaper or even pump breastmilk. The bathrooms may not be family friendly but I've heard more than once on some of the mommy sites I'm on, that the first aid stations are the way to go. Everyone should mention this to their clueless husbands!

Meme said...

5:31,

Thanks for the info. I would not have thought of that!

Anonymous said...

Really ppl - are you that naive? How do we know she didn't do something to that poor baby??

Meme said...

10:58....we don't. That's part of why it was posted here.

Anonymous said...

8:40
right ... but MOST posters on here are giving that lady the benefit of the doubt. I read the whole post ... same as you did, sweetie.

Meme said...

10:40,

First of all, I have a name; a moniker, unlike you. Please use it when addressing someone who has the decency to use one.

Secondly, do not call people that you don't know "sweetie." It's sleazy and rude.

"Moniker" said...

Ah, don't get your panties in a bunch!

Meme said...

"Moniker",
Oh yes, that level of maturity is sooooo much better. Thank you.

cali mom said...

Jeez people, this is not brain surgery. Yes, there should be changing tables in men's restrooms as well, or there should be "family" restrooms, but if there is no changing table, you use whatever bench, patch of grass, or surface is available and semi-private, and you lay a BLANKET on it for comfort and cleanliness for the baby and others using the bench. Think about it, would you want to lay your baby down on whatever someone's been spilling on that bench????

Though the first aid station is a great idea, I would not have known about that.

mom said...

Actually, now that you mention it...not one of my children was ever changed on a public restroom changing table. First, they were nonexistent when I had my first child. Second, I have only seen one or two that provided disposable liners to put on top. I don't sit directly on public restroom toilet seats and I wouldn't want to put my baby on a table that might be loaded with fecal germs. They even look pretty dirty to me. I sort of did what Cali mom suggested. You can usually find a private spot. I used my stroller A LOT too.
Maybe that would be a great product for somebody to invent...disposable changing table covers to carry in diaper bags.

Sam's Mom said...

Um, yeah, they already sell those disposable covers.

I had awoman ask when I was trying on clothes and my 2 month old was crying if I wantd her to hold him. Um no, are you crazy?
This was throug the door, I don't know if it was an employee or another customer.
Some people are just weird. Nice, but weird.

Anonymous said...

Sam's mom,
I dont think that is any way weird. She would be under the supervision of other people and store cameras. she was just being helpful. If you weren't comfortable, a polite no thank you should suffice. although I had a friend get in to slap fight with another mom in the mandees dressing room over a crying child. they were all you shut that child up and she was like what did you say and she said i said to shut that child up and she was like you dont talk to my child that way and she was like i am talking to you the ninny who brought the screaming urchin in the dressing room have you ever heard of a babysitter. long story short, they had to be seperated by some male employee. Which is funny because he had to get right up in there. oh to be young and uber urban.

mom said...

What? Is uber urban the new tacky?

But then I didn't know they made the disposable changing table covers either.


Better skeedaddle off and buy myself a cane any day now.

cali mom said...

Mom, LOL! That reminds me, I have a very close friend who had her babies VERY young (way too young!) and she babysat for mine when he was a tiny baby once, and I kid you not, she told me that at first she couldn't figure out the (velcro) fastenings on his disposable diaper because she was trying to find the backing to peel off, the way they worked when hers were babies.

mom said...

Velcro!?

mom said...

And I just missed out on the "Little Swimmers" diapers too...which means my kids had to waddle around at the pool with 40 pounds of water dangling between their legs. Ahhhh...the "olden days."
But the invention I retroactively covet the most is this contraption my friend has for her new baby that makes a loud noise if he pauses breathing at all during the night. With my first child I was like the mom from "Terms of Endearment" in my fear of crib death...up and down all night long to check the breathing, kicking the crib, beating on the wall, whatever it took to step up the breathing to a pace I found acceptable. Probably not coincidentally, all of my kids are VERY SOUND sleepers even to this day.(LOL) My husband and I almost died laughing when we saw the crib scene in Terms of Endearment for the first time. We just took one look at each other and laughed until it hurt.
Kids number 2 and 3 slept in our room until they had reached the age of safety...for obvious reasons.
In my defense...three people within about a one week period had wandered over to admire my brand new firstborn child and then out of the blue told me stories about how some baby they knew died of crib death. How mean is that!? Creepy, it was.

cali mom said...

Velcro, the refastenable scratchy side/fuzzy side tapes they have on disposable diapers nowadays. I assumed you were joking about needing the cane.

Anonymous said...

How about now the baby milk being made out of DHA and all of the other healthy fatty acids that can be found in breast milk? As soon as I stopped breast feeding (which was difficult for me at best), they came out with this wonder food. Boy, did I feel cheated. I went through all this to give my baby the best, and now they can closely duplicate breast milk? Wow.

Anonymous said...

And before you jump on me ... it was hard for me because I had alot of health problems associated with a difficult pregnancy/birth ... and I still breast fed. And I don't mean I was cheated out of the experience - I wouldn't trade that for the world. But maybe I could have stopped alittle earlier and given him this new food, instead of soy milk, ick.

mom said...

Aw Cali mom,
I was kidding... about both! (I suppose it didn't help that you could not see the really hilarious face I was making when I wrote those. LOL.)

Anonymous said...

9:20 and everyone, most dads, male babysitters or males in general are afraid to watch kids, change them etc. in public places because of the idiocy of some people that t hink that all men are pedophiles, thanks to john walsh and the morons of philadelphia.

i am a male nanny and would change my youngest charge in the bathroom standing or on the bench with a blanket over her.

to the op who stated that the female could of been a pedophile and for posting this i commend you!