Received Monday, October 1, 2007
Hack writers, be damned. Glorifying mannies is dangerous!
There's an extremely stupid pedophile you may know by the name of Emovocals. He's pro adult/child sex. He promotes the abolishment of age of consent laws. He also has a very dangerous profession....for a pedophile. You see Donald Shepherd is a nanny. Yes, a live in nanny.I'm not quite sure if Donald prefers boys or girls. But I am quite sure that he likes them both. He talks on GirlChat about liking little girls but not women. On BoyChat he talks about liking little boys. On one of his MySpace profiles, he posts that he loves LGs (little girls) and that his hero is Lindsay Ashford, a well known pedophile. He talks about accompanying the boys he cared for to gym class so he could watch the little girls. Parents beware. If you have information about Donald Shepherd, please contact: admin@corporatesexoffenders.com.
Submitted in part by Heidi, Carlie and Lucy.
46 comments:
i think the author of that tripe book gave away copies. she had a 2 million dollar budget to SELL it. A rap video. Sheesh.
Mannies are creepy.
And women who bring young men in to their home hoping that they pine for them...
It isn't going to happen.
Don't do it!
Oh my god, this is disgusting. Why would someone hire a live-in manny? I hate to sterotype, but you have to nowadays. Granted, their are women that are pedophiles, as well. But I still think its a majority of men. This is so scary.
There should be tougher laws out to keep these perverts away from our kids.
Jaquawn thinks it should be legal to kill pedophiles, starting with Chester Arthur Stiles.
Yes, you cannot stereotype, but you can play the odds. I would not hire a male to care for my kids, no way- no how. There are so few comments to this outrageous story- I think that parents are scared. We are scared by these pedophiles who are not only coming out of the woodwork but seem to be doing so with pride- like that guy with the website they chased out of one state. This is very scary.
yuck yuck yuck! I hope to god his employers find out about him.
Jaquawn, at first you came across as an idiot, but for once, I actually agree with you.
I've been reading a lot lately about how children are being taught to fear men - and how men themselves are reluctant to help a child in need, for fear of being labeled a pedophile. Not all men are "bad," and not all pedophiles are male. I think the "manny" should be handled on a case-by-case basis. If I was a single working mother and had only sons, a manny wouldn't be a bad idea, so the boys could have a positive male figure in their lives. However, if I had only daughters, a manny might be a little awkward. (I'm unmarried and have no children, but do have experience nannying).
The particular manny discussed in this post is clearly unstable, and should not be hired (you think his employers would have found out by now?!). This is just another example of why you need to background-check your employees, both male and female.
This is just horrible!
Thanks to Heidi, Carlie and Lucy for bringing this to our attention. One thing as a parent I think you must do is search the internet for references to your nanny, both in court, on myspace, on porn sites. There is a wealth of info out there, let us use it to our advantage.
1049, I mostly agree with you excepting that you think a manny would be "awkward" with your daughters but okay with your sons. There is a reason adults are not allowed in NYC playgrounds without children. The motivation of some of those perves for wanting to be around children is in question. And statistically, STATISTICALLY, you have to consider that the numbers are not stacked in the favor of hiring a male childcare provider.
I am still waiting for one of the ORs on the Agency Practices to post the detail about the nanny agency in Rye that sent her a nanny to her home that was a pedophile. These things scare me to death.
I am glad I don't have to work right now...daycare is safer than a stranger in your home.
This is disgusting.
As for hiring a manny... there is ONE man I would trust with my children (were I a mother) besides my own family. Because I have known him for YEARS, and our families have already pretty much meshed together.
Other than that... I'm sorry men. But don't even look twice at my kids. I'd rather be labeled a steriotyping prejudice sexist anal whatever, then have a child be hurt like that.
This is disgusting indeed, and I do agree with Jaqwan, and there SHULD be some way to charge this piece of shit with some crime and lock him up, but I find it really sad that a very few bad apples are poisoning the field for all the rest of the men who are extremely qualified and reliable and gifted as nannies or mannies.
I had a male Hungarian Buddhist "manny", who had at least 5 references that I personally called and talked to at length and had some experience working in hospitals doing therapeutic [play with babies in NICUS. All the refs raved about him, he'd worked with them from the time the babies were newborns until they went to preschool, and the worst thing anyone could say about him was he was a staunch vegetarian and didn't like having to feed the babies any meat products. I felt he was completely trustworthy, SAFE, ethical, experienced, capable and warm. He was here legally, and we paid him on the books. We just got lucky that he had recently started working with the absolute crap agency we made the mistake of going through.
I understand to some extent people's reservations but just think how horrified we'd all be if we substituted the word "Moroccan" for the word "male" in this debate.
Or would everyone be OK with that?
Past my bedtime...sorry for typos.
Cali mom - you had a manny? I thought you were a stay at home mom who felt strongly that children should be raised by their own mothers and not strangers.
There is a way to get him. He openly admits he doesn't pay taxes. It worked for Capone, why not this pervert?
The OPs need to contact the IRS
I, like 99.9% of the human population, think it is disgusting when adults target children sexually. However, it is wrong to make the generalization that any male who chooses to care for young children is a pedophile. I rarely see a "manny" or even a male babysitter but I have known a lot of men who are SAHD or who work in the ECE field who have been wonderful with the young children in their care. For example, my bil (who is Moroccan btw) is a middle school science teacher at a private school and he teaches preK and K science classes once a week as part of his job. Kids really love to have a male role model. Also, my female neighbor often subs for me (I do family child care) but her dh comes once a year to do a firefighter demo (he is a firefighter) and also subbed for me when I had a severe migraine for about 2 hours one time. The kids love him and I completely trust him to be alone with my kids. (Anyone who subs for me has to undergo a background check which he has.) Also, my older son (8 yo right now) loves kids because he has grown up with me doing child care and he has a very nurturing personality. I can certainly imagine him being a great babysitter when he gets older.
If anyone gives me the creeps or causes me to see red flags, I would never leave them alone with my kids whether they were male or female! We really have to go with our instincts AND get that background check!!!
I agree with you. There are great teachers who are male. And I am certain great mannies. The book that was published this summer was a shiteous piece of work.
As a mother with two children, I too am concerned about anyone who raises red flags. Any adult who would volunteer to babysit for free- unless a sister or brother or a trusted friend, would be a red flag.
What is interesting to me is that I had my daughter first and she is 3 years older than my son. While with her, red flags were raised when I got a "vibe" from some people. Most usually men. An exterminator.. a janitor.. a man on the street.
Then I had my son and thought things would be the same. That I could hone in on my natural instincts. I was at an event where I met a man who built custom spas and began speaking with him. My children were running around and running up to me during this time.
After the event, I learned the man was a convicted child molester who liked little boys.
I wonder do our "womanly" instincts carry over to perceive threats by those who might harm our male children?
We have certainly failed the children of this country when a KNOWN pedophile can promote himself (or herself) on the internet and not be prosecuted for it. I don't give a darn about their rights........as far as I'm concerned, anyone who hurts a child should pay a high price. When a child is sexually abused......it distorts their whole world view and they grow up to go on and molest others. It is an extremely hard cycle to break. Statistics prove that pedophiles are rarely rehabilitated. God help our country. As for the Manny debate.......I would never have a man or teen watch my small children.
No apologies here...everyone can think its terrible I would never hire a male caregiver. They are my children and I do what I think is in their best interest.
I still think a good preschool or daycare is better than one on one care. So when my child is two he will go to a nursery school three days a week. I feel its safer.
Stunning really.
I wonder if he's gone through an agency?
Some of the posts here have me convinced that they can't be trusted.
To clarify "they" being the agencies.
I already know not to trust my children to anyone outside my family.
2:52...I understand your concern, but if you really think a daycare is better than one-on-care, you are INSANE!
2:52
Kids have been molested in daycares. You need to check them out just as you would a nanny.
Its 2:52 When I mean daycare I mean an established one. Not a home daycare. I would never use one of those. Example: Theres a childcare center down the road from me. Its located in one of those Executive Buildings, with offices in the building a cafeteria, security guards, etc. I would think it would be safer. They have huge windows so you can see in as well. So theres nothing to hide.
I don't see anything wrong with a good childcare center. They can interact with other children, play, color, etc. He does that with me, but I think part-time care with others is good as well.
My husband is a preschool teacher. at what he does. HE IS NOT A CHILD MOLESTER. There are scary people out there, you have to really look into who you leave your children with (I am lucky enough to have my mom as a nanny), but cutting off a whole group of people because some of there gender are evil is just crap! That is like saying "don't hire a woman as an administrator. YOu know woman in power....."
The second sentence above is suppose to has "He is good at what he does" I don't know what happened.
9:22, there was a period of a couple of months where I went back to work, working from home first one day a week and then 2, and my husband went down to PT, so we had a nanny 2 days a week. We *very quickly* came to the obvious realization that neither of our careers was worth going through what we were going through to make this arrangement work out, and that the obvious solution was for one of us to change our situation so that we all could be together more as a family. It was a toss-up at first since his salary was higher but all the medical benefits, retirement and so on came from my job. But my boss was a prick, and his is wonderful, so that was a no-brainer after all.
I'm very glad we were able to make it work and I do recommend it as the best possible scenario. I see too many babies and other kids in our neighborhood with nannies EVERY DAY including weekend days, and I've never seen most of them with thgeir parents. I feel sorry for those parents who probably don't realize what they're missing and probably never will until it's way too late.
Cali Mom: In the neighborhood I work, most of the mothers are stay at home with nannies. It's great compromise. Not a lot of frazzled moms, and yes, it's not uncommon to see mom and nannies at the same places at the same time equally contributing to the childs welfare.
Please don't pity those who aren't you. It just makes you seem bitter on some level truthfully. Different strokes for different folks.
I have two things to say...
first- How does his employer not know? I might have missed something but isnt he registerd? So how did that not come up in background check And how can someone post everything about him and not contact the parents or someone in the town?! I might just make the hour trip and go on over. sick.
Second- its people like him who make good men untrusted. My boyfreind loves when he pickes me up because he can say hi to the kids i am in carge of. Not because he is a sicko but because he loves kids! He has even coverd for me at one of my familes. And they totally trusted him and said she was glad to have a good male role model for her sons to look up too.
Good choice, Cali Mom, but too bad you couldnt have come to the "obvious realization" before you decided to have children, as my husband and I did.
Saved us a lot of trouble. His job was the better one so I quit working about three months after the wedding, when we decided to start trying to have a baby.
You seem smart enough to have figured this out before subjecting yourselves, not to mention your child, to such turmoil.
10:14, yes unfortunately we had to go through a couple months of hell and slimy employers, trying to balance everything, before we realized it just wasn't going to work well that way.
11:49, if the parents you see are spending time with their kids, then they don't fit into the category I was commenting on. That is, the poeople who have chosen their "careers" over their children, and spend 12 hours a day away from their children, because they can't stomach the idea of changing a diaper, feeding a messy baby, shadowing an active toddler or interacting with a chattering, curious preschooler. THAT is sad, to me.
Anyone wanna go to the chatroom?
Cali mom - do you chatise your husband for choosing his career over his children? Do you pity him because he's missing out on his children's childhood? Or is it ok for him to make up for it during evenings and weekends? And if it's okay for him, why so much venim and pity for the working mom?
not all mannies are peadophiles....
If a mom doesn't have to work its better for her to raise her children. Maybe, she can go half-way and work part-time.
Most men want to be the providers for their families, to take care of their kids and wives. Alot, would go crazy staying home full-time with their children. Now don't get me wrong. Fathers are great!! But in my case, I worked a couple of days and my husband watched our son. He was going crazy being home. He loves the baby but can't take care of him 24/7. I think its just part of the make-up of men and women
737, where are you?
I live in the NJ/NY area and I always assumed I would stay home with the children after we had them. My husband however didn't want to give up the second income, even though half of what I make goes to a nanny. Men out here do not want to the wage earners. They are all looking for money. Money is all that matters out here. My husband and I fight about this all the time.
Oh sorry to hear that 7:46
Hey you are probably close to me! I am in Bergen County. So I know its so expensive! For now we get by on one car and a one bedroom apartment. Haven't been on vacation well since we were married. For now I am staying home. We are struggling, and stressed. I don't have family to help watch my child. And you know in Bergen the daycares are expensive some are $60-70 a day. I am planning to go back to work at least part time. I am tired of not having money to get contacts : ). And always worrying if our bank account is negative.
Wow, 1:54, why so defensive and venemous? Never mind, the answer is obvious.
P.S. those prescriptions are giving you some bad side effects. You're hallucinating again, so might wanna take it up with your shrink.
Do not ever copy and paste like that again!
what i was trying to put every post i wanted to quote into one post instead of multiple ones
ah well here are a few.
Anonymous said...
I, like 99.9% of the human population, think it is disgusting when adults target children sexually. However, it is wrong to make the generalization that any male who chooses to care for young children is a pedophile. I rarely see a "manny" or even a male babysitter but I have known a lot of men who are SAHD or who work in the ECE field who have been wonderful with the young children in their care. For example, my bil (who is Moroccan btw) is a middle school science teacher at a private school and he teaches preK and K science classes once a week as part of his job. Kids really love to have a male role model. Also, my female neighbor often subs for me (I do family child care) but her dh comes once a year to do a firefighter demo (he is a firefighter) and also subbed for me when I had a severe migraine for about 2 hours one time. The kids love him and I completely trust him to be alone with my kids. (Anyone who subs for me has to undergo a background check which he has.) Also, my older son (8 yo right now) loves kids because he has grown up with me doing child care and he has a very nurturing personality. I can certainly imagine him being a great babysitter when he gets older.
If anyone gives me the creeps or causes me to see red flags, I would never leave them alone with my kids whether they were male or female! We really have to go with our instincts AND get that background check!!!
i am a male nanny, I went to work with young children in 2001 when i took my first child development class. One of our assignments was to get practical experince in the feild via volunteer work. i went to my local preschool where i worked as a teachers asstant every friday, There i played with the kids and they really responded with me, without knowing how much i was needed, I got comments such as its so great to have a guy here, your so good with the kids, etc. none of them bad from parents. I also found that all my intrests and talents were very welcome here and that i could incoporate them into postive learning experinces for the kids, and my job would consit pretty much of having fun, and being a part of their development at a time when they really need to see men and women working together to understand that you dont need to be a certain gender to be a teacher, docotr or whatever, you just got to have the right stuff and the passion, both of which i knew i had. yet the staff however (except for a few) were looking at me all werid and treating me with a feeling as if i was some sort of freak. Parents saw this and asked why as well. i said i didnt know, it wasnt until i dwelled deeper that i learned about policy about men not changing diapers, taking kids to the bathroom, giving kids hugs, letting them sit on their lap etc. becasue some parents might complain and it mgiht end up like a mcmartain case. Funny thing was, that parents were the ones that complained that i COULDNT, and gave me werid looks like err why?! especially cause the policy included that when changing the kids, you have to be visible to everyone, same when taking the kids to the bathroom. Heck i did that even when i was in summer camp, becasue A) protection, B) give the kids privacy, C)I dont feel comfortable in general being in a bathroom with anyone kid or adult. but anyway i quit cause i was tired of the unecessary stress put onto me just cause of my gender from co-workers and i felt very un-easy about how i had to tell a child who came running up to me that i was sorry i coudlnt give them a hug, id get in trouble by miss so and so. i mean if you were a kid and someone told that to you a parent or a teacher how would you feel? imagine that. so after 6+ years, i quit and said i will only be hired by a place that treats me like an equal and also gets the a parents feedback as well. so far 20 preschools have tried to hire me since, one preschool was awesome but i had to quit in two weeks because my school schedule clashed with my work schedule man that was the biggest mistake EVER!! So i became a nanny so that i could finally without stress do my job. even today my employers even ask... you werent allowed o change diapers or take kids to the bathroom?!
they also find it odd how when I give the kids hugs its pretty much just a pat on the back and she tells me, you dont have to worry i know for a fact your not a pedophile and so does my husband we know your excellent etc. you can hug them and or give them a kiss. its okay!
still thgoh i dont give kisses back when the kids give me one. and with hugs i have to remind myself so much that im not in that type of position anymore,
and i still do the thing where i am visible, When she or he asks i say sorry force of habit. lol
Anonymous said...
I agree with you. There are great teachers who are male. And I am certain great mannies. The book that was published this summer was a shiteous piece of work.
thank you :)
As a mother with two children, I too am concerned about anyone who raises red flags. Any adult who would volunteer to babysit for free- unless a sister or brother or a trusted friend, would be a red flag.
ditto here! I mean it was hard for me getting work as a nanny, but hell i never would do that no matter what their situation was, theyd want me to pay them if i was the parent and one of them was the nanny!
What is interesting to me is that I had my daughter first and she is 3 years older than my son. While with her, red flags were raised when I got a "vibe" from some people. Most usually men. An exterminator.. a janitor.. a man on the street.
Then I had my son and thought things would be the same. That I could hone in on my natural instincts. I was at an event where I met a man who built custom spas and began speaking with him. My children were running around and running up to me during this time.
After the event, I learned the man was a convicted child molester who liked little boys.
I wonder do our "womanly" instincts carry over to perceive threats by those who might harm our male children?
i get a vibe from anyone there was this one lady at a doctors office who when my middle charge would go up to her and since hes very sweet and freindly would go upa nd give anyone a hug, she would fully embrace him, i mean most parents keep a distance male or female but this person fully embraced him. and the way she talked to him really just gave me the hebbee jebbees. i found out later that she does this with all the kids. parent or not, it just got to me.
my employer thoght the same. even thogh she was okay with her she didnt like how she treated him. and how she treated me just cause i was a guy. (she would give me instructions on how to feed the baby (who at the time was 18months) and would treat my middle charge like he was 1 year old!. I told her to stop please.
This one lady without even saying hi asked me what the names of my charges were. being in a rush i ignored her, and she asked again, i said striaght out, sorry i dont feel comfortable realesing that information, she said, i just wanted to know their names, I said i just dont feel comfortable by you asking so stop!. in the elevator everyone took notice, and she kept on giving me dirty looks which i saw out of the coner of my eye as i was talking with my charges.
We have certainly failed the children of this country when a KNOWN pedophile can promote himself (or herself) on the internet and not be prosecuted for it. I don't give a darn about their rights........as far as I'm concerned, anyone who hurts a child should pay a high price. When a child is sexually abused......it distorts their whole world view and they grow up to go on and molest others. It is an extremely hard cycle to break. Statistics prove that pedophiles are rarely rehabilitated. God help our country. As for the Manny debate.......I would never have a man or teen watch my small children.
statistics also dont provide the details of many of the un-reported crimes especially the ones wehre males are abused. because well women never molest..... EVER.....
tell that to johnathan davis of the band korn who was molested by his babysitter at a young age and his parents never belived him, and several of my friends. And many of the kids i worked with when i volunteered at childrens hospital.
heres the bottom line folks, just cause the number is smaller for women doesnt mean it will never happen, Sexual abuse is NOT a gender issue - It is an abuse of power and need for control furthermore RARE doesnt mean ignore!.
Anonymous said...
No apologies here...everyone can think its terrible I would never hire a male caregiver. They are my children and I do what I think is in their best interest.
I still think a good preschool or daycare is better than one on one care. So when my child is two he will go to a nursery school three days a week. I feel its safer.
2:52 PM
So what if you happen to h ire a female caregiver that would do the same? again. and if a man was in the child care center would you leave?
also youd teach your children to fear men?futhermore what about your husband, is he a child molester too?
i havent left the feild because I have said, NO this is the job i was destined to do and I dam well will not be somone who will deprive a child of someone who is a true role model, someone who takes pride in their work and is passionate about it and is showing them that it doesnt matter if you have a penis or a vagina, what matters is that your a DAM good teacher.
to the new poster, STOP COPYING AND PASTING entire comments in your reply. We don't know where one thing stops and the other ends. You are obviously new. Instead, please say,
Anonymous @ (insert time here),
and use quotes when you are quoting what someone else has said or written.
Sheeesh, you are annoying.
did you even bother to READ that?
now lets get back on topic please.
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