Received Thursday, September 20, 2007
To the parents of a sweet little boy wearing a striped shirt (w/ reds, blues and whites) and lt. blue denim jeans and white puma sneakers: I have your son's goldfish. I witnessed your son, of about 3 (?) at the park earlier this afternoon, (9/20) with a generously proportioned nanny with frizzy hair in a black scrunchie, Hispanic heritage and a deliberate walk. She may have been limping or have leg troubles. She was wearing a blouse, brown slacks and white, very dirty, slip in tennis shoes. She was in a dispute with your son out of reach of my hearing but she became enraged, snatched something from him and walked, limped to the garbage can and held it over the can and dropped it in. The child went nuts. She yelled at him in Spanish, "that's enough, enough" and then left the playground with a very firm grip on his arm. It took her a while to hold on to him. Always the curious sort, when I was within sight of the can, I stopped next to it, thinking I would see some sugary treat, but instead it was a goldfish in a plastic Ziploc baggie. It was so sad. I took it from the garbage can and brought it home with me. He's swimming around in a sun tea jar now. Is it me or is this a harsh consequence for a young child? Death of a (new) pet? I honestly thought he was getting some sort of food thrown away at the time. :(
59 comments:
That is horrible! What a wretched person. I really hope the parents see this and fire her on the spot. She is cruel to children and helpless animals.
Death or attempted murder of a pet is very traumatic to anyone in their right mind. The little boy could be haunted for years by the thought of his little nemo rotting in a garbage can. My God, this woman is desensitized and needs an exorcism.
OH,MY,GOD! How could she? How could she? She has just competely ruined that child's little bit of trust in her. He knew he had a living pet, and she was trying to destroy it!
He can easily grow up not caring about what life i, and not respect it. She has no idea how impressionable children are at that age! I am so angry by this, I swear. I'm so glad I wasn't there, because I would have followed her home, with the goldfish in my hand. yes, I am one of those nannies that buts right on in to the business of otheres if I see you mistreating your child. I'm also a foster mom, so screw that! I hope he's ok, and I hope he's able to use his words enough to be able to tell his parents ( I hope they care) what happened. F,her!
Thank Goodness OP rescued the fish. If only that little boy knew his little fish was alive. And not rotting in the trash...
Peace of mind.
This is by far the saddest thing I have read on here. I am sorry for that little boys heavy heart. This makes me want to hug the lil guy.
If the parents see this I hope they write in. What a bitch to just throw a life in the garbage can. What a heartless witch.
I would never want someone like that to babysit for me. She doesn't value life on any scale.
I am glad you looked in the garbage can and have taken the fish home. I hope the little boy tells his parents what she did.
Awww! This is so sad! I am so glad you rescued the fish! Good job!
That is horrible. The poor little boy, he must be so upset. I hope this nanny gets fired. She doesnt deserve to watch children. What a disgusting person!
That's probably the worst thing I've read on here in awhile. It defies all logic. What kind of asshole goes after a child's goldfish?
How sad. I wouldn't expect a pet to be thrown away infront of a child and the child isn't even hers. She needs to be let go. She has no heart. Can't image how she treats him behind closed doors if she has no heart.
OP, you should post this on Craigslist incase the parents go on that sight. What did you name the 'miracle' fish?
If the parents go on craigslist, then they know what they have. You get what you pay for.
10:34, I found a job on craigslist and I was with the family until the mother was able to quit her job and stay home again. I still babysit for them whenever they go out.
People who go to craigslist aren't bad nannies. So judgmental.
This is about a poor little boy with a heartless bitch as a nanny/babysitter. Whether or not she was found on craigslist is completely besides the point.
This is so sad. What a horrible person and that poor little boy.
What a horrible nanny. If he is three, let's hope he is able to tell his parents.
10:34 PM
I found my current job in Manhattan on Craigslist, and I am at the top of the pay scale. There are some nice families, and good nannies who use it, at least in NYC.
Saddest sighting I have read so far on this site. I hope the boy's parents are able to see this and update us. My heart is broken.
Awful!!! My MIL once told me she flushed my SIL's fish (when she was little) for getting a C on her report card. I never felt the same about her. This is abusive.
This posting nearly broke my heart. I hope the goldfish terminator is outed. PETA are any of you reading this?
While I do agree that this is awful on the part of the nanny and am not excusing this behavior, has anyone considered where the goldfish came from? There is a ridiculous new theme now to send goldfish or fish home as party favors. As was the case for a NEMO birthday party theme my 5 year old went to before the start of school. Instead of candy and junk (which I actually enjoy) my son comes home with a freaking fish.
10:29
I know I don't think those should be given out as party favors.
Still no right what she did. If he did get it from a party what gave her the right to decide if he could keep it or not. If the parents didn't want to keep it they could always give it to someone or back to a pet store.
So you pig out on your sons goodies that he gets from parties? How does he feel about that?
It doesn't matter where the fish came from. It wasn't a dog or cat. It is a low maintenance little fish that the little boy loved. This is so horrible. If anythig she is also abusing the animal and that is a crime. Yes it is a fish but it is an animal. That is so mean. Hatred for the little boy abosulte hatred that person had. She intentionally hurt that little boy feelings. What an ugly person.
10:29
What did you do with your sons fish?? I bet you ate it didn't you.
10:29
Why does it matter where the goldfish came from? If you don't want it nicely say to the parents hosting the party I don't want a fish. If your hungry ask for a bag of candy
OMG I have never heard anything as heartbreaking as this before! THROWING A PET AWAY???
I had a similar experience. During an acrimonious separation, I bought my son a hamster. The next day he had to go to his father's for visitation, and wanted to take the hamster along for the ride. When I got to the grandmother's house, I had to take the cage out so my son could get out of the car. Grandma grabbed the cage and took it in the house. I hadn't asked (or even expected) her to take it, but I thought, how nice that my son would have his pet with him for a couple of days.
About an hour later, my son's father called me, telling me to go back to his mother's and pick the hamster up! How sad for our boy.
Op:
I agree with the person who said you should put this on craigslist as well.
That is horrible for a nanny to do that to their charge. I would never in a million years do that to my charge. This is one of the saddest things I've read on here. Breaks my heart to think that little child is in that persons care
I really hope the parents see this
I would definitely put this on craigslist too.
I really, really hope you didn't mean that about goldfish and parties,lol...really. I'm pretty much sick of people acting like they're not smart, really.
Hell, I'm traumatized by this story!
Good work, OP! No dead fish on my watch!
i am posting a link to this story on craigs list. you cant copy and paste something on a site. the text here is like property, right?
having said that. this is a horrible sighting. and yes, fishes as birthday party favors are not a good idea, but I have stuck it out with my child for the eight days of the fish's life. It is my decision not the nannys'. A month or so after the birthday party favor fish died (which was not a goldfish) I bumped in to the mother and told her "rascal dies". She told me, "I was trying to give the children a really super party favor and I ended up giving them all a life lesson about death and loss." And she said this like she had really done something wonderful. The children were 6!
So, 1029, if someone gave you a puppy you didn't want, you'd accept it and then toss it into the nearest waste receptacle-- which would be okay? Talk about missing the point entirely here. The behavior the nanny exhibited here was not OK.... no matter the origin of the wee little fish.
Yes, Sprak- I thought I made that clear. The nanny's behavior was 100 percent unacceptable.
As a side note, I do hope that people who care about things like "little helpless fish" will think twice about sending them home in ziploc baggies with big eyed children and brute force nannies.
7:44pm, Some people are just stupid and will always send kids home with unnecessary party favors. If one of my kids came home with a cute little party favor fish, I'd call the organizer and say "Hey Kate, I am going to swing by tommorow morning to return the fish that you gave little johnny. Please promise me you will take good care of this precious fish. Remember, the bigger the tank, the happier they grow. Also, if you could send little Johnny a weekly update on how the fish is doing, that will be appreciated because he is very sad that we are not allowed to have pets in our building".
Oh God, I feel sick reading this. someone should stuff that nanny in a ziplock bag full of water and dump her in the trash. And flush that MIL too! What a sick sick evil thing they both did to demonstrate such a total disregard for life. The destruction of something precious to the child is only part of it, the shocking callousness of killing a pet is the other part. A fish is not quite the same as a puppy, true, but still it's a living creature and not harmful in any way to anybody (like a spider or bee you might kill).
I think the chances are good that the boy should be able to communicate well enough, and seemed upset enough, that hopefully he could relate this to his parents. so unless the evil bitch nanny tricked or threatened him into keeping quiet about it, they may have found out.
Don't count on it. Three years is still very young and it sounds like this nanny is very effective at terrorizing this poor little boy. I hope the OP runs into the boy again on a weekend with his parents. Take good care of the fish--the sun tea jar is a bit small for a goldfish--hopefully God will see fit for your paths to cross again and you'll have a chance to rescue this poor little boy by ratting out the horrible thing the parents trust him with.
Its rotten what she did. I was sad when I read this post.
I was just thinking how everyone is upset about the little fish. What about abortion. Do you feel the same way? If a fish makes us so upset, what about the life of a child.
That's like comparing apples to elephants.
I agree with 12:21
A fish is tossed in alive. A fetus is already dead and put in the trash. Of course its all contained so no one will see it.
12:21...I am 100% pro-life. I mean HARD CORE, big time, 100% Anti-Abortion, but even I can see how a gold fish is hardly a comparison.
You cannot seriously think you can turn a discussion that is actually about this nanny's abusive behavior towards this child by discarding his fish (not really about the life of the fish itself) into an abortion debate???? Get real and find a more productive forum.
12:21, your post would make more sense if nasty nanny had killed the fish and tossed it out.
I bet there are lots of forums out there that discuss all aspects of abortion rights. This isn't one of them.
She basically did kill it or she had the intentions knowing if it was in the garbage it would die
4:54....12:53 here: true, but still not on par with an abortion discussion. Take to someplace that will serve you and your arguement better. It just ain't gonna happen here!
I.G.N.O.R.E. Don't fall for the Abortion Vs Goldfish debate. There are alot of very important and highly sensitive topics in the world (Global Warming, Universal Healthcare, Darfur, Balance of Power, Human Rights, Women's Rights, Child labor, Stem Cell Research, Civil Rights, Absolute Monarchs, Environmental Degradation, Poverty, etc). They all can't fit on this site, so lets stick with nanny/parent sightings.
kelly,
I was just going to say that the Fish Lover sure rushed to save the fish, but has he/she come out and supported the Jena 6?
11:44PM, you should try organic apples, I hear they taste better than regular pears. What do you think? LOL :)
The "Jena 6" is another completely OT and irrelevant topic here but since you brought it up, I'm not sure why the fish saver/OP should be expected to "support" them.
Yes, cali mom.
I was being facetious.
As Kelly understood.
LOL, OK, I get it.
OMG, Cali Mom! DUH!
This is terrible. Just terrible. I hope the child felt strong enough to tell mummy and daddy what this beast did.
fish arent really alive anyway, i would have thrown it out too. think about it. nanners probably thought she would have to buy a bowl, food, whatever, and rightfully doubted she would be reimbursed for those costs. plus the kid was probably being a brat. he'll have forgotten in like 10 seconds anyway.
Your comment makes you look really stupid, 4:25. Fish aren't really alive?? Well what are they then.
This person should be thrown in the trash with the rest of the garbage.
Why not return to the park on the same day of the week. If you see the Nanny, follow them home and if they live in a doorman building, explain the situation to the doorman and leave your number for the parents.
I would definitely want to know if my Nanny were behaving in such a manner.
You people are sick. Did you ever think that maybe the kid's parents wanted the nanny to get rid of the fish. How do you think the nanny will explain the fact that the fish is missing? Won't the kid report the missing fish to his parents?
And fish are food. I've taken my boy fishing with me, and he see's their thrashing bodies on the end of the hook... he sees them alive when they are thrown in the bucket, and he's in the kitchen with us when we cut the head off, gut the bodies, and descale them.
It's only a fish. There's no trauma involved. Trust me.
1:23 PM
-My dad was a fisherman and I saw a lot of fishes thrashing and being cut open too, and I AM traumatized! To this day I won't eat a fish. Just because your son does now doesn't mean he will always, or that no other child is effected.
Err I mean FISH. Not "fishes"
What was I thinking?
1:23, there's a pet fish and then there's a dinner fish. You'd actually take the time to gut, scale and cook a goldfish for your dinner???
I guess you think it would be fine if the nanny took the boy's dog and made it into shish kebob, because after all, most humans eat meat.
You're either a real sick idiot, or The One...
I've often heard it said that fish, like lobster, do not feel pain, but I really must wonder who decided that and how?
Lorenza,
calamari feels pain.
Please remember that and tell your friends. stop eating calamari!
oh, say it isn't so. i happen to love calamari. being an island girl, i just love most seafood, eventhough i'm allergic to most crustaceans. yum yum!
FYI: About fish and pain
While it may seem obvious that fish are able to feel pain, like every other animal, some people still think of fish as swimming vegetables. In fact, regarding the ability to feel pain, fish are equal to dogs, cats, and all other animals. Dr. Donald Broom, scientific advisor to the British government, explains, “The scientific literature is quite clear. Anatomically, physiologically and biologically, the pain system in fish is virtually the same as in birds and animals."”
Indeed, neurobiologists have long recognized that fish have nervous systems that comprehend and respond to pain, and anyone who made it through Biology 101 knows that fish have nerves and brains that sense pain, just like all animals. Indeed, scientists tell us that fish brains and nervous systems closely resemble our own. For example, fish (like “higher vertebrates”) have neurotransmitters like endorphins that relieve suffering—of course, the only reason for their nervous systems to produce pain killers is to relieve pain. Claiming that fish do not suffer is as intellectually and scientifically sound as arguing that the Earth is flat.
Interestingly, scientists have created a detailed map of pain receptors in fish's mouths and all over their bodies. A team of researchers at the University of Guelph in Canada recently surveyed the scientific literature on fish pain and intelligence. They concluded that fish feel pain and that “the welfare of fish requires consideration.” Dr. Lynne Sneddon, a scientist of fish biology in the United Kingdom, explains, “Really, it's kind of a moral question. Is your angling more important than the pain to the fish?”
Scientists at Edinburgh University and the Roslin Institute in the United Kingdom report that in response to pain, fish also feel emotional stress and engage in “a ‘rocking’ motion strikingly similar to the kind of motion seen in stressed higher vertebrates like mammals.” The research team concluded that fish clearly experience pain in the same way as mammals, both physically and psychologically. A study by scientists at the Queen's University of Belfast proved that fish learn to avoid pain, just like other animals. Rebecca Dunlop, one of the researchers, said: “This paper shows that pain avoidance in fish doesn't seem to be a reflex response, rather one that is learned, remembered and is changed according to different circumstances. Therefore, if fish can perceive pain, then angling cannot continue to be considered a non-cruel sport.”
As you would expect from animals who we now know to be intelligent and interesting individuals with memories and the capacity to learn, fish can also suffer from fear and anticipation of physical pain. Researchers from universities across America have published research showing that some fish use sound to communicate distress when nets are dipped into their tanks or they are otherwise threatened. In a separate study, researcher William Tavolga found that fish grunted when they received an electric shock. In addition, the fish began to grunt as soon as they saw the electrode, clearly in anticipation of the torment that Tavolga was inflicting on them.
According to Dr. Michael Fox, D.V.M, Ph.D., "Even though fish don't scream [audibly to humans] when they are in pain and anguish, their behavior should be evidence enough of their suffering when they are hooked or netted. They struggle, endeavoring to escape and, by so doing, demonstrate they have a will to survive."
What happens to fish before they end up on your plate is nothing short of cruelty to animals—whether they’re farmed or pulled from the ocean, fish are treated in ways that would warrant felony charges if it were other animals who were so horribly abused.
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