Received Saturday, October 8, 2006
I had a very annoying encounter with your nanny yesterday at Funtime. Your son, Jack was in the care of your nanny. Your nanny appeared to be keeping a reasonably focused eye on him, but did not budge or raise an eyebrow when he had his SECOND skirmish with my son who is only three. I walked up to the netted and was friendly to both of them and asked if everything was okay. I did not even correct "Jack" but instead suggested to both of them that hitting was not allowed. I tried to coerce my son to go in another direction away from "Jack". But soon, Jack was on our heels. "Jack" was poking at my son as he was on the red jeep, "Jack" was bumping in to him when he tried a run at Big Bertha. This is as I stood right next to my son, as I felt I had no choice but to stay right on his heels. This did not stop "Jack" from asking for my son's tickets. I attempted to make eye contact with you nanny many times. She stared at me as if I were not even there. Finally, I went up to her and asked, "are you with Jack?" I was smiling, just hoping she could have a word with him but instead THE NANNY answered, "Oh I knew this has been coming. You been on him since you got here". What? It isn't my job to be "on him".
Parents of Jack, do you allow him to behave this way when in public with you? And by this I mean demanding tickets, pushing, kicking, hitting, stalking other children?
Is this a "Jack" problem or a "nanny problem" ?
6 comments:
I think it's a nanny problem.
Mental Note to self:
Avoid Funtime!!
Who or what is Big Bertha?
There is a difference between following the parents choice of parenting/discipline styles and allowing a child in your care to behave badly and/or upset or endanger themselves or others.
I always make sure I am on the same page with my employer about rules and restrictions, discipline styles, etc. But that doesn't mean I give the kids carte blanche when they are in my care. There have been MANY times that I've said, "I know mommy and daddy let you jump on the bed and when they get home, you are welcome to do that. But while I'm here, the rule is no jumping on the bed." The same could be said for little Jack and his nanny. Perhaps his parents allow him to bully others when they are in charge. But that is no excuse for his nanny to sit by and do nothing when she observes it. She needn't take punitive action or even draw attention to the situation if she is worried about undermining his parents. A little positive redirection would have defused the situation.
I agree with Annie. If a child is spending most of his waking hours with a nanny, she is responsible for setting standards of behavior while he is with her. Clearly Jack's nanny is not teaching him good behavior,or modeling good manners.
A nanny
Sounds like neither are his parents. Poor kid, he's headed for disaster.
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