I have a strange situation. My acquaintance and neighbor had a great nanny for three years. I am a stay at home Mom and my friend works. The kids would get together often, so I had a lot of contact with the nanny. When my husband and I traveled, 3 times, she babysat my children. One time, we went to Pakistan for 12 days. I really trust her and had a great regard for her.
My neighbor/friend started to work from home and this deteriorated their nanny/employer relationship. The nanny was fired on Monday, on the spot and told to clear out by 3PM. The employer left with the children. The nanny was in tears and came to me. It sounded completely unreasonable on the employer's part. I offered the nanny our guest room.
Now, I have the nanny staying with us. My kids play with their kids and the mom doesn't want the nanny to see the kids, for no reason except to be punitive. The kids miss her desperately and she misses them. The woman/neighbor is also a person of "power" in our community. She sent me a series of texts accusing me of stabbing her in the back by letting the nanny stay here. This person has never been a friend to me, she's not a nice person.
To that point, the last text I received from her states that she is going to the police station to file an order of protection against the nanny because she is claiming that the nanny is here to stalk her. The nanny is from Virginia, has no family in CT and has no place to go. She wasn't given severance or warning or anything, and this after THREE years.
Everyone tells me not to get involved, to wash my hands of the situation and to send the nanny packing. The odd thing is that Monday was the first day of summer vacation. My children are now home all day, I could really use a nanny, and there is no nanny I have higher regard for than this nanny. My husband says it won't ever work to have her here, that her boss will make our lives miserable. (She has already banned her children from playing with our children, or coming to our side of the street). The houses are very spread out here, each property sits on at-least an acre, so she has no reasonable cause to feel stalked. I know she knows what she did is wrong. It feels abusive and like power and control being used to hurt her and then me.
The nanny is staying in a what was designed as a mother in law suite in the basement. It faces the opposite direction of her house. Our back yard and driveway also face opposite of their house. The nanny does not need to pass by their house at all. Can I make this situation work? I have had some offers come my way to get back into the design field, free lancing,largely from home and part of me thinks this is perfect. And then the next minute, I think I am as crazy as she is.
edited for content-JP
My neighbor/friend started to work from home and this deteriorated their nanny/employer relationship. The nanny was fired on Monday, on the spot and told to clear out by 3PM. The employer left with the children. The nanny was in tears and came to me. It sounded completely unreasonable on the employer's part. I offered the nanny our guest room.
Now, I have the nanny staying with us. My kids play with their kids and the mom doesn't want the nanny to see the kids, for no reason except to be punitive. The kids miss her desperately and she misses them. The woman/neighbor is also a person of "power" in our community. She sent me a series of texts accusing me of stabbing her in the back by letting the nanny stay here. This person has never been a friend to me, she's not a nice person.
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| Mark Hess |
Everyone tells me not to get involved, to wash my hands of the situation and to send the nanny packing. The odd thing is that Monday was the first day of summer vacation. My children are now home all day, I could really use a nanny, and there is no nanny I have higher regard for than this nanny. My husband says it won't ever work to have her here, that her boss will make our lives miserable. (She has already banned her children from playing with our children, or coming to our side of the street). The houses are very spread out here, each property sits on at-least an acre, so she has no reasonable cause to feel stalked. I know she knows what she did is wrong. It feels abusive and like power and control being used to hurt her and then me.
The nanny is staying in a what was designed as a mother in law suite in the basement. It faces the opposite direction of her house. Our back yard and driveway also face opposite of their house. The nanny does not need to pass by their house at all. Can I make this situation work? I have had some offers come my way to get back into the design field, free lancing,largely from home and part of me thinks this is perfect. And then the next minute, I think I am as crazy as she is.
edited for content-JP
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