The Struggle is Real

Created by Renee
     Just wondering if any of you have been in this situation before.. I have been working for this family for about 9 months they have 2 young girls. Unfortunately for me they are sending their kids to full day/ sleep away camp next week for the entire summer. They kind of told me this in early June which was kind of late and I have been desperately looking for another job. I have been to several interviews and they all went great but I never heard anything back from them. This one mother emailed me all the way from Jersey she needed a live in.. I didn't want to do live in but I considered it. We spoke on the phone for a short while and she seemed like she really needed someone and I answered all her questions honestly. She sounded really excited and asked me if I can come for a physical interview at her house. I decided to go all the way to New Jersey, the trip alone cost me $20.00. When I got to her house, she opened the door and I noticed she was African American like me. I immediately knew she would not hire me because I was much younger and not trying to blow my bubble but I was prettier than her. The house was really nice, very nicely furnished and decorated, they had a huge playhouse in the backyard plus a deck, and a very big modern kitchen. the interview went ok, she didn't seem as excited to speak with me like she was on the phone, but I tried my best to still show that I was interested.

      She introduced me to her husband, he too was African American.. I met all 4 of her kids and they seemed lovely. She wasn't offering much for the position her payment was between 400-550 a week, I told her I would accept 600.
     After the interview, she showed me the bedroom in the basement where I would be sleeping, it was also right next to the kids playroom. We then went back upstairs and chatted briefly, I got my stuff to leave and said goodbye.. And that was the last time I ever heard from her again.. I never received a text or email explaining why I didn't get the job. That was very frustrating for me a little, but I already had that feeling.
     I think I'm a great nanny/ babysitter, I enjoy caring for kids, I'm honest, respectful and hardworking .. All the kids I have cared for they all love me but I have bad luck getting jobs!
This is my final week of work and I think I have send out a gazillion applications but little response.. I have looked around and noticed that most nannies where I work they are either old, really fat, or just sloppy looking. I rarely see young nannies who like me are in shape, and pretty.
     I hate to make this observation but it's true.. I have no interest in anything other than being the best nanny I could be but I feel like I'm at a disadvantage. Anyway just wanted to share my struggle ...
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Cananny said...

Wow ! Get over yourself !!! I'm a career nanny of 16 years ( now at home with my own kids) but im a fat , plus sized white nanny who did her job! I was active and engaged my charges... I never had to look for long for a job because I was good at what I do... And as a parent now I would have seen right through your phony self !!!

Anonymous said...

I feel ya..
Have you tried going through an agency? The agency I found my job through sends out emails occasionally for one-time jobs where the family is in a bind and needs someone for just a day or week. This came in handy when I was in between jobs and needed to fill a week.
Hang in there! You'll find something soon.

Jmaria said...

If you're as snotty in person as you come across in this post, you really shouldn't be wondering why you're not being employed.

Jessica said...

Hate to burst your bubble, but I'm a -by everyone else's standard - very beautiful girl. Im fit, very well proportioned with a curvaceous figure to boot. I've never had an issue getting work. Whether my MBs were prettier than I or otherwise. I think your issue may be more an awareness of self. Are you giving off the "I know you're jealous " vibe? Do you feel defensive and come off hostile? Snotty isn't attractive just fyi. Try treating your future bosses as people and and you may find that people aren't that shallow. The husband wants the nanny thing is only in the movies.

ZD said...

I have to agree with most of the previous comments. In your post you come across as really focused on being attractive and prettier than your potential MB. I have no problem hiring a young pretty nanny. In fact, I prefer someone younger than me. As to whether or not they are prettier than me, that is in the eye of the beholder. It sounds like the vibe you could be giving out in interviews is sizing up the MB to see if you are prettier or not. I wouldn't hire you either, not because I am intimidated by you, but because your focus seems to be on looks not the children.

Anonymous said...

I am curious as to why you prefer to hire nannies that are prettier than you? Honestly, just wondering. ��


Anonymous said...

Okay even though she seems to have a big ego she got a point; attractive nannies are less likely to get hired. A lot women are insecure so they would rather hire the ugliest fish looking nanny they could find instead of the good looking curvalicious nanny. It's a FACT. Doesn't mean good looking nannies are condemn to have it hard when it comes to find a job but harder that their ugly fellas ;)

I am not jessica alba but I'm probably a 7 which is fair enough on the attractive scale though I never had any trouble to find anything.

The trick is that from when you go to interview: make sure your ugly as fuck(don't mean dirty , just ugly) attractiveness is the threat to mom boss in the nannies world and you need to understand that.

Don't wear make up wear professional not flattering clothes, if you got glasses it's a bonus and go straight to the point, THE CHILDREN. That way you'll have better chances to be hired.

I always make sure I'm fugly at work until they know me well enough to know I'm too professional to destroy their family by messing around with their husband.

You can pamper yourself when your off :) !

Even though most nannies are way too professional to have sex with their husbands, there is a small percentage that are infiltrated gold diggers and seduce their husband and it's that kind of nannies that moms are terrified about which brings us to the first point I made ; their want the ugliest caregiver they can find :D

Good luck

Anonymous said...

Wow... Ok, No. I am attractive (six foot tall, hourglass figure type), curvy, and single, but none of that is my bosses concern. I've never had issues with being hired, I always dress modestly/appropriately for my job, I wear minimal makeup (but that's my preference, not because I think I'm so hot that everyone will hate me, seriously smh) and I interact professionally with the mothers and fathers alike. I think if you go into an interview with the thought "geez, this mb is so unattractive" you are going to have issues. The point of the interview isn't to play up how stunning you (think you) are or compete with mom boss. You are there for an interview, where you present yourself nicely, tell them about your childcare methods and experience. I usually will wear dark jeans/a casual skirt, and button down shirt/nice top, and cute, weather appropriate shoes. I have full, curly hair that reaches my waist, but I usually will wear it up (babies love to grab hair ;D) in a ponytail or updo/bun style. I wear my normal, daily makeup which consists of a bb cream, a swipe of blush, a bit of eyeliner and mascara. I'm not trying to meet a hot guy- I'm looking for a job.

Aysi said...

I'm w you!I have bad luck getting jobs too :( I have nothing but good references and job history yet my searches are stale... I wish I had advice for you but it just be like that sometimes #keepyaheadup

Anonymous said...

I worked for a mom in Hell's Kitchen for a time. She introduced me to some of the other moms she hangs out with. We went to Bryant Park with this group once a couple of summers ago and when we returned back to the apartment MB told me that one of her friends was looking for a pt-weekend babysitter so Mb recommended me. Mb told me that this woman, who I only met that day, said that she would never hire me because she was afraid her husband would cheat on her with me. I think of myself as attractive, but that's not the first quality I think of myself as. She even tried to make my MB insecure and nervous because of her insecurities. So yeah, it really depends on how secure the mom is feeling when hiring a young, in shape, attractive nanny. But don't just assume that is the reason. I would contact them and ask them how they thought the interview went.

Anonymous said...

@ Cananny I can't believe you know soo much about me in a few paragraphs to call me phony!
Seems you're mad that I said the word" Fat".. Which is what you are and what I'm not!

@jmaria .. Snotty guys and your name calling smh! If you can't contribute to this post with a relevant input just shut up!

@jessica girl bye no one is checking for you .. And I never said I wanted anybody's husband!

Clearly yall did not read my post clearly.. And missed my points about me saying I'm a respectable, hardworking and honest individual .. These qualities about me got sidelined. I do not care and want for anybody's husband and I dress appropriately for work, the day of the interview I never came across as if I'm better than anyone I wanted the job, why would I act in such a way!

Kim said...

Op/anonymous poster, you've said the " don't want nobody's husband thing several times! Me thinks thou dost protest too much! If you're going to your interviews with even 1/10th of the attitude shown here, it's no wonder no one's called you for a job. To use your dismissive tone: bye Felicia!

RBTC said...

with very much due respect to the OP - i was completely with you until you became rattled by the trolls who insulted you for the fun of getting you emotionally riled - the other advice given was very sound - there may be an emotional element going on

however you sound very sincere and will learn with experience and love kids - keep us posted ;)many of us wish you the best

Unknown said...

She said she prefers someone younger than her, not prettier.

this_nick said...

Some of the input isn't kind but it is relevant. People are trying to tell you that you come off as snotty, whether you mean to or not. Based on the responses you gave here I'd tend to agree with them. As "it takes one to know one" let me assure you, I can be snotty too, so I know whereof I speak. An attitude adjustment could help your job prospects, or you could stay in denial and have approximately the same job prospects.

One thing you can't do us post something at this site with the expectation that you'll receive feedback that echoes how great you think you are and ignores any problematic areas. That's what girlfriends are for, not web sites full of strangers. #protip

this_nick said...

*is not us