Sunday

Baby Advice Needed

I'm hoping your readers can give me advice for soothing an 8 month old baby that is fighting naptime even when tired.

Baby until recently save things like illness or teething would go to sleep independently starting from 4 months old. I've tried music. Belly rubs, hand holding, etc. Baby only gets more upset with these methods. I've tried leaving baby to cry. Baby will eventually fall asleep this way , but it takes about a half hour and I can't stand the crying I feel horrible. I've tried putting to bed earlier or later with no success. My employers are firs timers and leaving it up to me. I've cared for babies, before, but none like this situation where nothing works. At wits end.

7 comments:

bethanytx said...

one of my 9 month old twins started doing this 6 weeks ago. We did modified cry it out. If he was really crying and not just whining, I'd go in and comfort him without picking him up. rubbed his belly, sing or talked until he calmed down.

Siriusly_James said...

Gather all your nanny strength and settle on one method and one method only that feels okay to you. Stick to that. Even if he cries, squirms, fights himself awake, you stick to what you do.
It won't take long before he'll learn that it doesn't matter what he does, because you have decided that it's time to sleep, and that it's safe to sleep, and that it's okay to go to sleep this way that you have decided for him.

For me, it has been holding one hand and stroking the forehead with my other hand/pushing the stroller back and forth (Dansh kids nap in strollers)/wrapping up tightly in blankets/singing one song over and over/saying "good night, (name)" over and over - different methods for different children and different times. You know best what you and your charge'll feel more comfortable with.

Sticking to one method and one method only has ALWAYS worked for me.

Oh, and I have never used cry it out, ever. It's not necessary at all and can be harmful, so I completely understand why you don't want to do that.

♥ Amy Darling ♥ said...

As a mother of three grown children, I have been through what you are going through 3x over.

My belief is sleep training an infant is that they need to learn that they must fall asleep on their own.
In my nanny career, I have been instructed to walk children in their strollers, drive child in their car seats around the block, carry baby carriers back and forth, etc...to get a child to fall asleep.
This is so damaging to the child in the long run since you are creating a bad habit. If a child becomes accustomed to being rocked/coddled, etc. to sleep on a regular basis, then they will NEVER learn to fall asleep on their own which is a skill that everyone of us eventually needs in order to survive.

I know attachment parenting, etc. condones crying it out, but I let all 3 of my children cry it out. Sure it was tough the first days, but the outcome was that eventually when I said it was "nighty night time," my kids knew what that meant.
W/three young children, I didn't have the time or energy to do tummy rubs and sings songs.

When my kids were toddlers, they were awesome at falling asleep on their own.
They would just walk to their rooms when it was nap/bed time and say, "See you later!"

That was something I didn't see very much w/other kids in their age groups.

Now as adults, I tell them how many families I work for ask me to drive their child around the block to get him or her to sleep and they agree it is quite ludicrous. I tell them I let them cry it out...that was how I handled things and the funny thing is...they don't even REMEMBER crying in their cribs!!

So that just goes to show you, no permanent harm can result in letting a child cry it out.

I highly suggest you try this.

Kara said...

Been there and tried everything. I was very cynical, but I read "The Sleep Lady's Good Night, Sleep Tight" book by Kim West. And, I swear by it! I finally got baby boy to sleep and stay asleep in his crib. It's for all ages, but he's 8 months also. I will be giving it out at every baby shower from now on. Good luck :)

Siriusly_James said...

http://www.phdinparenting.com/blog/2008/7/5/cry-it-out-cio-10-reasons-why-it-is-not-for-us.html

MissMannah said...

Honestly, a half hour isn't too bad, if the baby is taking a good nap. If he is crying a long time and then only sleeping like 15 minutes, you should probably change the schedule. At 8mo, many babies are ready for nap schedules, I believe I did naps at 9am and 1pm, for about an hour apiece with my last charge. A good thing about the nap schedule is he'll know what time to go to sleep if you're consistent with it.

neva_eva_always said...

Try lightly scratching his back under his shirt but don't talk to him during this time. That's a comfort some kids I've watched enjoy. When one was into the teens she enjoyed having her back scratched when I was around to watch younger siblings and it'd put her to bed very easy lol.