09 May, 2012

Chronic Tailgate Makes Nanny Habitually Late

opinion 1
I have been late 3 times in the 6 months I’ve worked for my family been because traffic is horrible no matter what time I leave. There is always traffic accidents. The only option is to leave very early and be at their house early which is awkward and they’d expect me to work but do not want to compensate for that time. It is also difficult because I have no one to watch my son that early and I can’t take him with me because his school is in a different city. Every time there is a problem I offer to stay later that day. This week I was 1 hour later one day because of a car accident, and I agreed to work later that day. Now instead, they want me to divide it over 3 or 4 days the next week I work. I know I was late and have no problem making up the time but this seems silly to me. I’m also sad because one time when they had an emergency I cared for all 3 of their kids instead of my normal 1 child and didn’t charge them more. How shall I work this out?

28 comments:

Truth Seeker said...

It seems that the location of your family is a huge inconvenience for you. Being late this often does not bode well w/your employer at all. Punctuality is vital in the Nanny profession since parents cannot leave the house until the Nanny arrives.

You sound like a good Nanny to me, what I think is that you need to find a new position closer to home. That way, you won't have to worry about the commute.

I am surprised they are still keeping you. I probably would be fired for being late so often. NOTE: By NO means am I implying that you deserve to be fired OP!!

Phoenix said...

sorry to say but this is your issue not theirs. The only reason I say that is because I am a chronic late arriver to EVERYTHING. Work is the worst. We were having construction on the busiest road to my work. i was always late and I told my boss. He just said, "find another way to work."

MissMannah said...

I am not nearly as nice as Truth Seeker because she thinks you don't deserve to be fired and quite frankly, I do. Lateness is a deal-breaker for me, I hate it just that much. Why did you accept a job that is so inconvenient for you? I cannot comprehend being an hour late for work and still having a job! You need to start looking for a job closer to home or your son's school because this is ridiculous.

Susannah said...

Sorry OP, but it looks like you should start looking for a new job.

The traffic situation isn't going to change and you can't be late all the time.

As for making up the hour that's fair. I think it's silly of them to ask you to split it over 4 days. I think they are just trying to get out of paying you for extra time they need.

Tell them you can make it up on that day or you'll take the loss in pay.
As for the emergency where you cared for the extra kids for free that's your fault. You shouldn't have let them get away with it.

It doesn't sound like a good fit. Plain and simple, nobody's the bad guy jut not a good match. Cut your losses and move on.

Phoenix said...

the thing is your bosses have you on a time. if you keep arriving late they don't have to let you make up anything. They can deduct your pay though. It isn't fair to them and they don't have to accomidate you for any reason. Being late is not good. I almost got fired for being late. I have a sleeping problem....which is not waking up and staying awake while I drive. I had to go to my doctor and get medical proof to give to my boss. He adjusted my hours and I am the only one in the company that starts at 9:30 am. I couldn't get to work by 9 no matter what. I couldn't do it. YOu will need to get their early everyday or you drive their early then take a walk around the block till your shift. YOu can get some exercise or read. Do something but stop being late. Period

Sticky said...

I was a nanny many years ago, and looking to go back to it BTW~ but I always lived a fair shot away from them...I could not afford their neighborhood! If certain traffic/road construction or the winter roads here were going to pose a threat to my arrival time, I left alot earlier. The relied on and paid for my arrival at a certain time. If I left way too early and did not want to go right to their house, I would go sit in the parking area a few blocks away from them and read and drink my tea, etc. If it was due to snow, I just went to their house a few minutes early and they always appreciated the head start. I guess I never had issues, but we worked well as a team for the most part (8 years with them). Good Luck!

Jersey said...

I totally sympathize. I live almost an hour from my employer, and the traffic to get there is ridiculous. But I took the job, so it's my problem. I leave my house an hour and 20 minutes before I have to be at work, knowing it will take an hour without any "incidents". I spend 10-20 minutes in their driveway... checking email, calling my husband, etc.

Being late is rude. I don't do it to my employer, my friends, my family or any other commitments. And I agree with Miss M. You should be fired for showing such a lack of respect for your bosses.

Lyn said...

I live 10 minutes away from my current familly. Personally, I still leave my home 25 minutes before work every morning. I spend a few minutes checking my email and isyn in their drive way or I just circle the suburb a few times. Your being late regularly isnt something they should have to work into their plans for the day.

Bethany said...

I think you need to start looking for a differemt job. I know easier said than done. But you've been there 6 months and the traffic situation hasn't improved it's also impossible for you to come in earlier because of your son.

I'd say your best bet is a new job.

Nannyof2 said...

Are you an hour late all the time?

Or was it just the once. Not that that's good but if your an hour late all the time I'm surprised they've kept you 6 months.

I agree with the others your best bet is to chnage jobs to some place closer.

Stella said...

When they hire me they new they were out of my area that I normally work. They even agreed to pay a bit more becuse of it. They knew about traffic and my son and said it would be ok because if there was a problem the mother works at home and is flexible.

Most times I am 5 minutes late. I leave as early as I can without sleeping there.

I cannot just quit as you say I have no job and it is only me that works and only my son. I have no one for him.

I know I am wrong to be late but I cannot not stay late every day because my son and I cannot be late for them.

StrawberryShortKakes said...

I was in a similar situation last year. I took a job that was about 40 min north from where I lived, with intent of moving up that way in a few months. Most days, the traffic wasn't bad getting to their house but sometimes it would be terrible. I would leave an hour before I was supposed to be there but working such long hours, I was not happy about often wasting 20-30 min of my life sitting in my car when I knew I could have used that time to clean, sleep, or do something more productive!

In the end, I had to leave the position for a number of reasons (I wasn't fired) but the unpredictable traffic was at the top of the list. It really isn't fair to the parents to not be able to rely on you to get there by a certain time in the morning. I am guessing they need to be to work by a certain time. I also think that, like me, even if you were able to leave your house early, most days you would wind up wasting time in your car and it really isn't worth all the stress. I agree with the others that you should do the family and yourself a favor and find a new position.

leftcoastmama said...

Is it possible for you to move closer to the family?

Would they be willing to change you from a live out to a live in?

leftcoastmama said...

Nevermind. I see you have a son.

You're best bet is to try and find another job nanny or otherwise.

I don't think either party here is a bad guy.

It's just not a good match it happens sometimes.

I hope you are able to find a good job fit soon.

Let's take a moment... said...

I think it's obvious that this arrangement is not going to work out, OP. And no one is saying to just "up and quit". No, rather start looking for another job that is closer to your home and finalize it; then, give your resignation to your current family and start up with the new one. I think both parties will be much happier in the end. Good luck.

MissMannah said...

I reread my response up there and I realised it made me seem like I can't relate and I'm just being bitchy. That is not the case, I have totally been in your shoes. I used to have a job that was an hour and a half away from home so the commute was just awful. (that was in traffic--in no traffic it was more like 45-60 minutes) But I was never late because I always left so early. The parents relied on me to be there early because they were both doctors. But I finally had to quit because I couldn't stand the commute and spending all that money on gas. I ended up taking a daycare job 20 mins away from my house because it was the only thing I could find in the meantime.

This brings me to another point. You, and other nannies on here, sometimes have to settle for not-so-great jobs (like daycare) just to make ends meet while you're looking for the great nanny job that will meet all your needs. It sucks, but we've all been there. Too many times I've seen people running out of money or stuck in a horrible job because they insist they can only accept nanny jobs.

utnanny said...

Does your city not have traffic updates via the morning news, internet or radio? If you really like the job invest in a gps unit that has traffic assist. Mapquest alternate routes so on days were there is an accident you can get around it.

Professional said...

Professional thing to do is get there 10-20 minutes early and look at your phone. Being late is unacceptable in any profession.

NVMom-movedtoTX said...

If this family is flexible with time because mb stays at home, would they be willing to shift your schedule by a half hour? It sounds like that would cut back on nearly all of the lateness and eliminate the need to stay later. It couldn't hurt to ask.

Sarah said...

I work in the SF bay area and traffic is ridiculous. With no traffic it takes 25 minutes for me to get to work but with multiple freeway accidents it can easily take between 45 minutes to 1 hour 15 minutes (no way to tell). Since it's not possible for me to move closer (peninsula is uber expensive) I just join a gym close to my employers house (sometimes the parents will share the cost with you to get you there on time), I leave at 6 when there's no traffic, work out, shower, and drive the 2 miles to my employer's house. I get time to work out and get to skip rush hour. Win win.

UmassSlytherin said...

Being late is a deal breaker for me. I agree with the posters who said OP needs to find something closer.

Being on time is being 5 minutes early! said...

I currently only live 10 min away from my work which is WONDERFUL! But my last position was about 30-40 minutes away. I always left between 45-50 minutes away - 60 if I wanted starbucks! I kept a book in the car and if traffic was good and I got there 20 minutes early I would park in a park or store right by their house and read until I needed to be there. Being on time is being 5 minutes early you know!

Don't be tardy for the party! said...

I'm with "Being on time..."

When I lived in another state I worked for a family that lived about 30 minutes away; HOWEVER, traffic was a nightmare and it would often take 60-90 minutes to get to work.

I left the house at 5:30AM to ENSURE that I was on time for my 7:00am start time. In 4 years, I was late ONCE because of heavy snow.

If I got to work too early I would park in a nearby parking lot and read, finish my make-up, or go to Starbucks.

If my nanny was consistently late (more than a handful of times in a year) I'd be really upset. I view nannies as I do any other professional.

MissMannah said...

I was late for work yesterday and it reminded me of this post. There was a car accident right outside my apartment complex so I couldn't get out and traffic was completely stopped. I called MB and told her about it and she said not to worry. I got there at 9:03. (my start time is 9am) I was very apologetic and she said "Only you would consider this running late." So yes, I agree with the two PPs that being on time is 5 minutes early.

sorry said...

Find a new family closer to home.

sorry said...

What I meant to say is, an hour late is not a little thing. It's a huge deal. It's a job ending unless you happened to get into an accident type deal.

Now if you were two or three minutes late every now and then, and they were making a big deal of it, I'd feel more sympathy.

Not that I don't feel sympathy for your situation, but rather I think you're in denial. You need to accept that you have your needs, they have their needs and no matter how much you like them, or they like you, it's pretty clear this isn't a good match.

Tamm said...

Just because you allow extra time and get to work early, doesn't mean you have to show up to their house early. There have been a lot of times where I arrive early, so I park around a corner and read a book or something. I feel like showing up to someone's house early, while better than being late, is still disrespectful of the family's home and private time. Besides, I don't want to start work before my shift starts!

Stella said...

Why does everyone jump down this woman's throat or tell her to quit/move? Three times in six months is not that bad. It's not as if she's late every week!!! It boils down to one tardy every two months. She even said it's not typical that it's one hour late. I live in Dallas/Fort Worth and w have some of the worst traffic in the country. With construction and accidents, you could easily get an unexpected 20 - 45 min. added on to your commute w/o any notice.
I say keep your job if you like it and just give them a call if you know you'll be late. It sounds like the mom has flexibility. Not sure what to do with making up the time.Hope you figure out something that works for you!