Wednesday

A Moment of Truth

opinion 1
I've retired from nannying and moved on to the real world, but it was something I did for several years while I was a student. One thing I will never understand is why parents would EVER treat a nanny poorly... when that person is the one essentially raising their children.

I once worked for a mother who would send texts to her friends complaining that I was eating their food and making fun of my weight. It was at that moment that I stopped caring about her baby. I, of course, would never have done anything abusive to him, but I had no problem putting him in his crib and letting him cry himself to sleep (don't get your panties in a bunch -- plenty of people let babies cry to sleep and defend it as a parenting choice. I think it makes them shitty parents, but it's hardly abusive.) And when it was time to get up, you bet that I didn't rush up to comfort him. I did the bare minimum of my job, met his needs, and never harmed him... but I stopped caring. On the other hand, when I worked for parents who were kind to me, I LOVED their children, cared for them gently and lovingly and as though they were my own.

So, parents... ask yourselves... why ever would you be rude or unkind to someone who you are entrusting with your most precious possessions?

81 comments:

RockyMtnNanny said...

It is true that a lot of parents treat their nannies very poorly. However, in all the jobs with horrible parents I have had, it never once made me stop caring about the children. I think that is why most of us put up with parents we dislike, because we have grown attached to the children and don't want them to suffer for their parents mistakes. I would put in notice and leave if the parents are intolerable, but up until my last moment of work, I would take the best care I possibly could of those children.

Jleigh said...

What you did is awful and I am very glad to hear you are no longer a nanny.

SA said...

What did that innocent baby ever do to you? Why did you punish him for your issue with his mother? How can how much you love a child depend on how much you like the parent?

I sincerely hope you enjoy the 'real' world, and never go back to nannying again. Nannying isn't the real world? It has been my world since I was 19, it is very real and I love it.

I don't like to get nasty online, but wow you really make me angry. I am so sad to think of that poor little baby feeling like no one loves him. You have no right to take your feelings out on an innocent child.

no words said...

I have no words...
Shame on you!!
ok I guess I have 3 words
SHAME ON YOU!!!!

Bethany said...

omg! you know sometimes I wonder why people have no respect for nannies, and now I know in part it's people like you who call yourself a nanny and behave like that.
And your proud if yourself for taking it out on the kids?

I really hope this is a fake post trying to get people riled.

Nanny Lisset said...

I think that parents who treat their nannies bad, take the chance that the nanny will treat their child sub par. It is a fact guys, whether you like it or not. The chance exists.

I wouldn't want a nanny watching my child that was unhappy with the way I treated them. Plain and simple.

By the way, there is nothing wrong with letting a child cry for a few minutes before they go to bed. I am a nanny/parent and I have lots of experience with this. When my children were younger, I would put them in their cribs after making sure they were fed, in a dry diaper and not too cold/hot. AND only during their nap/bed time of course. At first, they would cry...kids do not like to go to sleep even when they are very sleepy....then after a few minutes they would fall asleep. When they got older, it was easier for them to fall asleep on their own.

I work as a nanny now and some of the things parents make me do to get their child to sleep drive me nuts. One child will only fall asleep in her stroller so I have to walk the child around the block until she falls asleep (even in the rain!). Another child needs a special back massage for twenty minutes or so to sleep and yet another child needs me to drive him in my car around the block until he falls asleep.

Children need to learn that sleep is something that a child needs to learn to do him or her self. No coddling involved.

A lot of "attachment parents" will disagree, but I stand by my opinion. The more we cater and coddle our children, the more spoiled they will become.

Manhattan Nanny said...

Yes, your momboss was awful, but that doesn't justify your behavior.

"I stopped caring about her baby..... I had no problem putting him in his crib and letting him cry himself to sleep ... And when it was time to get up, you bet that I didn't rush up to comfort him. I did the bare minimum of my job,"

That is emotional abuse. Infants are very sensitive to your attitude and need and deserve a loving engaged care giver. Read about the long term effects of this kind of treatment in Romanian orphanages.

Thank God you are no longer a nanny. You sound immature, and you don't think nurturing and educating children is a "real world" profession.

Bethany said...

Nanny Lisset she didn't let the child cry a few minutes as she was falling asleep just to learn to sleep after properly being put down.

She let the baby cry just to get back at mom

If you don't see the issue in that in her attitude I question your nanny skills as well.

As for disagreeing with a parents ideas, I think it's a nanny's job to also teach. You know actually communicate with parents about their chiilds needs and how to meet them in various ways, and if you still can't come to an agreement well you decide if you stay or go but you don't do whatever you feel and take your issues out on the kids.

Bethany said...

I say the above as someone who has taught many children how to sleep, showing the parents as well. Many parents don't know any other way until you show them.


Back to OP you loved no child. Love isn't based in selfishness, maybe as you grow older you'll realize that.

arizo said...

To, Manhattan Nanny,
Don't you dare to talk like this about my country. You have no knowledge what is happening there, plus... you don't even know what is happening under your nose, in the US.
You just heard something from somebody... but you dare comparing the situations...
Mind your own business.. smart a...

ELam said...

Well, aren't you a real peach.

I was recently in a horrible nanny situation where the MB made my life miserable, but I did not ONCE take those feelings and tension out on their children. In fact, I think showed even more love and affection to the kids as I knew I wouldn't be caring for them much longer because I was going to quit.

Thank God you are no longer a nanny (which I guess is a profession in fantasy land as you stated you have entered the real world..). You should be ashamed.

ELam said...

Also, arizo, pipe down. Manhattan Nanny wasn't making a generalization about your country. She was referring to specific studies and very public information that has been released in the past. Obviously there are orphanages in every country with issues, the situation in Romanian orphanages is one of the more well known.

Good grief, we are much to sensitive and politically correct in today's world.

ELam said...

in Romania*** sorry for the typo.

ELam said...

Oh my gosh, never mind, there was no typo. Clearly it is time for me to go to bed.

good for you, OP! said...

Thank god. finally an honest, realistic post. I applaud you, OP.

Parents need to realize that the way you treat your caregivers directly effects the care you get for your child. It's like when waiters spit in bitchy people's food. It happens.

Furthermore, it is only a matter of time before a child who has assholes for parents grows up to be a big asshole.

The truth hurts. Lick it up, baby. Lick it up.

Dr. Juris said...

I was a waiter before and I NEVER EVER spit in anyone's food that was rude to me or that I didn't like. Perhaps that's because I'm not an immature asshole who thinks that just because people are rude to me that I have some sort of right to get even. Two wrongs do not make a right.

BeantownNanny said...

I'm curious as to why you seem to think the job I do over 50 hours a week, a job I love and that I am very good at isn't part of "the real world"

I'm not sure what you were trying to get out of your post, perhaps you were trying to enlighten us nannies living in lala land. All you managed to do is insult a whole career choice and make yourself look like a bad person. I am glad you are no living in our fantasy world as clearly you sucked at your job.

good for OP said...

Kiss it, Dr. Juris. You may never have spit in someone's food, and neither have I. The point is that it happens. It is a reality. The lesson: don't treat people like assholes because what goes around, comes around.

I am certain that 3/4 of posters on ISYN have had a waiter spit or jizz in their food. Because most of the people on here are assholes.

BeantownNanny said...

What goes around comes around? What exactly did that poor baby do to deserve compromised care and downright neglect?

didn't your mother teach you any manners said...

Wow "good for op", you're such a big ray of sunshine, aren't ya? If the people on this site are so far below your intellect, how 'bout ya do us alllllll a favor.... and go eff off somewhere else?

la said...

I've had terrible experiences with nannying for intolerable parents as well. I now occasionally bsbysit for two children I nannied for as babies. The oldest was three when I started. The youngest was one month. The mother would constantly tear me down and make me feel like crap. I never took it out on the girls even though the oldest had started treating me in the same manner.

As they got older (now 5 and 8) they treat me terribly. Telling me I'm ugly, fat, stupid...I babysit them about twice a month. I've started getting really frustrated also. I know it sounds cruel, but on particularly bad days I put them to bed an hour early, don't let them watch TV, etc.

What I'm getting at is that as children older, they watch how parents treat you and begin to think it is okay.

I know this reply is all over the place but I'm using a phone to post send they're not exactly the easiest to write with.

Verizon said...

How did this girl know what texts Mom sent to her friends? Break into Mom's IPhone or hear about it from the friends - Hey, your boss says you eat her out of house and home and are FAT ..wanna see the texts? Oh don't worry about the baby crying!!!! Look at these texts!!!

ELam said...

la -- Why do you continue to babysit for these families?!?!?!

la said...

I continue because I'm a huge pushover. It would be awkward because the mean girls go to my church. I still have to see them each week. I also feel bad because their dad died.

I've actually been coming up with really lame excuses as to why I cant babysit each time she asks me. Its a really horrible house to work in. her own niece quit on her as well!

Dr. Juris said...

Good for you: I think you've watched "Waiting" far too many times. I also don't see how my disagreeing with you somehow lowers my IQ.

Phoenix said...

i do understand the way that you are thinking. But, what you did was actually passive aggressive. The parents treated you bad and you took it out on the baby.

Now I hate my husbands dog. I hate that thing. But he loves it very much. Now, I would never hurt the dog but she knows that i don't like her and when I'm around she acts different. Babies are the same way, they know when you don't like them and it does alter their behavior. And I hate the dog because that dog is dumb and pees on shit, I hate her because of her. Not because of my husband.

Even though you didn't physcially abuse the baby, you did abuse him. You acted out in quiet anger, took revenge, made a conscience decision to treat him differently than you would normally.

Now I am one who thinks that babies can cry themselves to sleep. It isn't what you did, but how you thought. You think parents who leave kids to cry is shitty and yet you did it. That baby didn't treat you bad.

I'm one of the meanest people on the planet. but I couldn't even do that.

Z said...

There is a huge difference between letting a baby cry it out in order to teach the baby good sleep habits, and letting a baby cry because you are mad at its mother. That is just sick. If you really feel the need to 'get back' at the mom, start slacking on the housework, don't clean up after yourself, something like that.

I hope you talk to a therapist about this. It is messed up that you used a baby for revenge, but what is really scary is that you don't seem to see anything wrong with what you did.

It's a fake post said...

plenty of people let babies cry to sleep and defend it as a parenting choice. I think it makes them shitty parents
Well then wouldn't that make YOU a shitty nanny?

It doesn't matter, this is a fake post by a troll.

StrawberryShortKakes said...

The main point of your post is that parents should be kind and respectful to their nannies, which I agree with you 100 percent. However, your reasoning is that parents should be kind for fear that the nanny will abuse the child, and that is just wrong! Your post comes across as a slap in the face to parents like "Look what will happen if you treat your nanny badly!" I think previous posters have made it clear that nannies who may be treated badly still shouldn't take it out on the children. Especially babies who didn't do anything wrong.

I once worked for a mother who would always claim that she told me things when I know that she didn't. Once she called me while I was at my own home and asked where I was because I was supposed to be at her house watching her child. She had never even asked me to come! I had to hurry to her house and I was furious because that isn't the first time she had done that to me but I certainly did not take my anger out on the child. Of course I wasn't the best nanny in the world that day but I certainly didn't leave him fend for himself while I sulked. I'm glad you're no longer a nanny, OP.

did not mean a racial slur said...

I doubt this post is fake. It seems pretty real to me. Maybe you're all just naive.

Olivia, I didn't mean it as a racial slur at all. Sorry you took it that way. It really did not occur to me even what it was when you said it. I had to google it.

good for op said...

wow i just read your language arts critique on me. you have way too much time on your hands.

smart doesn't mean perfect grammar and punctuation. smart is partly knowing what reality is as opposed to lala fairytale land. wake up. people are like this. that is my only point.

and you can have perfect grammar and punctuation and be stupid and irritating as hell, which you are.

I am lazy when it comes to typing on blogs. why should I care? it's a comment on a blog, not a college entrance exam or a thesis.

I think this post is totally true and I applaud OP for sending it in.

good for op said...

oh my freaking god miss mannah, wtf. you are such a nancy drew blog dork. I did not send in this post. ask mpp to check.

again, I certainly did not mean a racial slur by that term. I do apologize and really did not know what it meant.

You get what u pay for said...

Ok so I've nannied and raised many lovely kids... And I must say you get what you pay for. And I'm not talking about a good hourly salary. I'm talking about the overall experience. Do you pay your nanny when you take days off? Do you give a generous bonus? Do you treat her well? If not you can expect me to be resentful and wash your whites with jeans. Or season your dinner poorly. If you treat me kindly I will be extra patient and kind- because I give what I get. OP letting a baby go to bed by themselves is how I raised all of mine. Their first words were please and more. And they were kind. We would lie if we said we never cut a trip to the park short bc well we just didn't care anymore to push ourselves harder bc there isnt proper appreciation. I get what you are saying. Parents think!

Bethany said...

I don't think anyone here disagrees that parents should treat their nannies well.

This isn't a debate about crying it out.

This isn't about cutting a trip to the park short.

This is about a nanny who changed her behavior towards a BABY, not because she was trying a sleep technique but because she was mad at the mother.

NervousNanny said...

As awful as this OP is (and she so is!) I do have to agree that when mistreated as a nanny, I have in the past found myself feeling more distant from the child.

Example, there was a family I worked for for a short time, with one child, about 18 months. The parents became increasingly demanding and I wound up leaving after just two weeks. The first couple days were alright, and I played with the baby as I would any child-read books, played games, sang songs, etc. The mom began to be really specific about "how" i was to play with him. She wanted to know weird things-like how often/many books we read, which books, how did we read them? Did we practice all his numbers/letters/words today? Plus she added chores, which I did not sign on for.
Although I appreciate the mom wanting to know what happened during the day (I keep a log in my current job) I felt like I was trying to meet her specific play goals instead of just being lead by the child. It was forced and uncomfortable for us both.
Although I still believe I gave great care to that child, I found myself distancing some from him, and I think a lot of that is that I knew I was not going to stick around.
This OP is awful for taking it out on the baby, and I never condone that, but I am just saying that I think some distancing can happen when being mistreated. That being said, I have had issues with my current family, but I still love their child!

world's best nanny said...

One family I worked for had a child who had been kicked out of 3 or 4 daycare's. This child had many undiagnosed behavioral issues. After being hit, having feces thrown at me, and having a plastic air craft carrier dropped on my head from the second floor, I hardened my heart against this child. I had to. The child had a sibling, I showered most of my attention on this child.

The older child I kept reined in, while protecting the younger child and their friends. This child is now 17 years old, I hope the child got help.

dodo said...

I see where the OP is coming from.

You don't go the extra mile when the parents are sh*tty. You provide the bare minimal acceptable care but no, you just don't take much initiative anymore. You distance yourself from the child.

Or sometimes if parents give you lots of chores, you get tired from them. You have no down time so when the child(ren) is/are up, you just do easy things instead of fun, stimulating games.

Kait said...

Hey there... I enjoy reading this website but have never posted before. My name is Kait, I'm not nor have ever been a professional nanny...I just did the usual teenage babysitting and I did spend a year as an au pair after university.

Anyway, I just wanted to say that I understand the OP's lack of dedication to the job if she's being treated poorly...but not when it extends to the child!!

My host parents were very nice to me and also often generous, and as a result I'd go to the moon for them... Did a lot of little household extras I was never asked to do, made a loaf of healthy banana bread for them to have each weekend, etc. Humans definitely work that way, you get what you give!! On the other hand, if they weren't that nice to me I couldn't imagine treating their young son poorly...I think I'd just decide to leave. You can't take it out on the kid, that's just wrong...

Phoenix said...

I know what. Why don't we all start showing things that aren't racist.

For the love that is wholly. GET THE FUCK OVER IT!

Not everything is racist. And you feel that something is racist. That is your own personal problem. We don't know what race anyone is unless they put up a picture. So to feel that a posters innocent comment had racial undertones when in fact it did not. That is no ones problem but yours. I am very fucking tired of people thinking that every dam thing said is racist. Oh but when others do it to white people, that's not racist.

Bullshit - everyone needs to grow up. The world does not revolve you and your problems with being too sensetive. And if someone is racist, who cares. That is their own ignorance and still not your problem. christ all mighty. We have a submission about a nanny who mentally abused a little baby and someone is worried about other people's point of view on the world. When clearly there was no ill intent.

I'm getting so tired of people talking about race. People wouldn't be racist if you would just shut the fuck up

Mom Who's Grateful You Aren't Her Nanny said...

Rarely do I post here although I read it often in my spare time. I'd strongly suggest that if you don't like the parents or their treatment of you that you behave like the adult in the situation and either communicate with them to make changes, or you find another job. Children do not deserve anything but the best care from their parents, caregivers, family and community. Sometimes these posts make me so very very grateful for the woman who watches my son. I often go home and give her a huge hug and tell her how very grateful I am and how much I appreciate her. She's like family to us...she loves my son as if he was her own. I wish all parents could be so lucky. I'd be mortified to have a caregiver who was like you.

haha said...

to "mom whose grateful:"

your nanny probably hates you and talks so much trash behind your back.

Sami said...

I am really disappointed to see other nannies agreeing that their dislike of a parent can distance them from a child. I cannot understand this at all. I never ever think anything a parent does is the child's fault at all. How could I possibly harden my heart against a child because I don't like their parents? If I love a child, I love that child.

I had a job once where the mom would literally scream at me if something wasn't done exactly right or if she was in a bad mood. This made me dislike her immensely, but it didn't make me love her kids any less. In fact, it made me understand them better. Their behavior was a little trying at times, but after seeing what mom was like I had a lot more sympathy and understanding for them.

It is never the child's fault if the parent is doing something wrong, and we all need to remember that. IT IS NEVER THE CHILD'S FAULT.

OP said...

You truly are retarded if you think my motive makes any difference with respect to how "cry it out" affected the baby. If being denied comfort and attention when he or she is crying harms a baby, then IT HARMS A BABY. Whether the reason is "sleep training" or revenge on a shitty mother, THE EFFECT IS THE SAME. I think it's shitty parenting to let a helpless baby cry to sleep.

To the person who said, "doesn't that make you a shitty nanny?" the answer is YES, and that's the point. When I was treated well, I was a GREAT nanny. I'm still in touch with two families-- one with older children (who are coming to my wedding this summer), and another with 5 year old twins who I watched as infants. They adore me, and I, them. But to the cunt who decided that my eating an ice cream sandwich from her stash (I read it on her blackberry when she left it behind one day), I wasn't going to go above and beyond for her kid. As a karmic sort of post script: , I lost 70 lbs and now wear a size 8 while she, after having a second ugly kid, looks like a COW.

OP said...

As for the waitress/spit spin-off: I think it's true that it happens, but it is wrong, and I don't think the metaphor really applies to what I did. Adulterating food because a customer is rude is more like abusing a child because the parents are assholes. I never, ever, ever would abuse any child (or animal or anything.) You're not slacking in your job by spitting in someone's good; you're affirmatively doing something harmful. A more apt analogy would be to say that rude patrons can't expect a waitress to make those customers a priority. They'll wait longer for refills. The waitress likely won't rush their food to them. She won't be as a friendly. Because you get treated as you deserve. If your mother is my boss and she is an asshole, I'm going to care less about you.

But if you think what I did was abusive, then you've got a bone to pick with at keast 60% of parents who let their infants cry. I'd never do that as a parent... but it's not abuse.

talesfromthe(nanny)hood said...

OP, you aren't just a crap nanny, you're a pretty snoopy little thing, aren't you? I think it serves you right that you got your feelings hurt because you were poking your nose into your MB's business.

I am quite glad you are out of the nanny universe, and I hope that when you snoop in your current employer's business you get caught and fired on the spot.

Bethany said...

I think you know what you did was wrong and that is why you are trying every way possible to justify your actions.

All I can say is it does all come back at you eventually.

Bethany said...

So you admit what you did was abusive? By your own system of beliefs letting a baby cry it out is abusive, and yet that's exactly what you did. You went against your own principles just to get a little underhanded revenge.
How interesting.

You decided it was ok to be abusive because Mom didn't think you were wonderful. Seems like mom was correct.

OP said...

Nanny hood- I would never snoop at a real job.

Bethany- try some critical reading. I know you're just a nanny, but it's not so hard. I think letting an infant cry is shitty, but it is not abusive. It's a method of parenting that is used by many, many parents. I wouldn't use it, but it's not abuse...

Nanny E said...

I think that it is a sign of your immaturity that you would do such a thing. What you did was incredibly petty, and you continue showing your immaturity by saying her children are "ugly". That is just so below the belt, I don't even know what to say.

Believe me, I'm sure it was incredibly hurtful to see her say those things about you, but why didn't you just quit, if it was so damaging to you? And tales is right, if you are snooping around, then you can't complain too much about what you find. Curiosity killed the cat.

I think that you wrote on here expecting sympathy or to have the nannies on here agree with what you did, and now that they don't, you are lashing out.

ALee said...

Really? The parents probably treated you poorly because you treated their kids poorly. You probably never tried to be a positive member of that unit. Nannies who think that they can do whatever they want and if they don't get their way retaliate by treating the kids badly are selfish and immature. We have had nannies that live by their own rules and don't "play ball" with the way things work in our home, and no one is ever happy. The nannies that try to mesh with the existing family culture do the best. Parents simply give nannies constructive criticism and immature nannies take that as being treated badly. By the way, leaving children to cry and ignoring when they need comfort is abuse: it is called neglect and has been shown to cause lifelong problems in people. It can also be considered a crime. I hope you're happy having been a part of the problem instead of the solution. Thank goodness you are no longer a nanny.

laughing out loud said...

This blog is nothing but a fool's playground...and the biggest fools are those nanny wannabes who post on a regular basis. No genuine, self-respecting professional nanny would spend her time fermenting in the fantasy and fiction cesspit of isawyournanny.com

"just a nanny" said...

OP,
It is a good thing you are no longer a nanny. You would have trouble helping my charge with Wordly Wise homework.
I suggest you look up the definitions of metaphor, analogy, and for good measure, simile.

Good for OP said...

ALee:

you said "They probably treated you poorly because you treated their kids poorly."

I think you deserve a prize for making the stupidest, most idiotic comment EVER on ISYN.

lmfao.

why would someone keep someone on if they treated the kids poorly?

I just can't stop laughing.

And great post, "laughing out loud!" lmfao!!

Bethany said...

Intentionally ( and in some caes unintentionally) harming a child is abusive.

You believe leaving a child to cry it out is harmful.

Therefore leaving a child to cry it out is abusive.

Former nanny, thank God! said...

Wow!

I find funny that OP said she's in the real world now. It's funny because even parents think this way. They think being a nanny is a lower job, and that's why lots of nannies are treated shitty. I've once heard of a mom who was looking for a nanny, and was very disappointed by the fact that nannies were charging around $15/hour. She said "If you want t get $15/h, go get a degree"!!! Seriously, lots of parents look down at nannies, no matter how great the are to their kids. I think there are some exceptions, but if most of you here think you are REALLY part of your charge's family, you should review it. It's all BS, and a easier way to manipulate you when they need you.

Ex-nanny, thank God! said...

I actually don't think she was abusive, I think she did negligent the kid, didn't comfort him right away, but it wasn't really abusive.

If she really wanted to get back at the mom, she should never show up on the next day and let her hanging there without a caregiver and late for work!!!!

ELam said...

Karma's a bitch, OP, karma is a bitch.

Former nanny, thank God! said...

I also do get it why she does not include nanny in the real world. It's because nanny is such a belittled profession. I have seen a lot of people making fun of it. You don't really have a "career" as a nanny. It's a job. And there's a difference between a job a a career. That's why I am also out of this field,and getting into a career. Thank God! Tired of being looked down by parents, teachers (when I'd pick up kids at school, teachers would treat me like if I wasn't there!), kids gym and swim class...

OP said...

Karma is for fools, eLam. Good things happen to all people, bad things happen to all people. It's all a crapshoot.

Bethany-- abuse isn't really that subjective, sweet-cheeks. I think letting a child cry is SHITTY, but it is not abusive. Kinda like spanking. If you think otherwise, call the cops and report the 50+% of parents who do it every day. See what they tell ya.

OP said...

Just a Nanny-- I suggest you study the words "metaphor" and "analogy" as the Greeks used the terms. But you go on and keep helping rich kids with their homework and I'll happily pull in 250 a year as an attorney...

MissMannah said...

Former nanny, perhaps it depends on what type of nanny you are if you get respect or not. One has to demand and command it. Nannying can be a career, maybe not the same sort of career where you "move up" the corporate ladder, but who cares? It is one where you'll always be able to get a job because people will always be popping out babies and will always want quality care for them. As for getting respect from teachers...right now I am working as a nanny and I'm doing an internship at a school. I am very well-respected among the full-time teachers there because I am a nanny. They know I get paid better than they do and they also know that my work is more rewarding. I have been offered a job at that school and I've already turned them down and the director understood when I told her I'm a nanny. She said she remembers her nanny days fondly. Not everyone looks down on us. Also, if you are working for someone who looks down on you, then maybe you just need to change jobs, not throw a fit.

Susannah said...

There's a bit of irony that on a blog created to report negligent/abusive/shitty nannies one of these shitty nannies turns herself in.

AndReallyBadEggs said...

OP seems like a very insecure person. You snoop through your employer's things to find out what they think of you. When you discover they don't think you are the sunshine of the universe you set out to take revenge. But you don't take it directly to the source, nope you're not brave enough for that, instead you take your anger and hurt feelings out on someone who can't fight back.
You were a failure as a nanny so you have to put down the entire profession as beneath you.

AndReallyBadEggs said...

Congrats on the 250k a year. Hopefully that lasts. I'll probably never make that in my life, no do I want to.

I'm happy being a good person. That's success for me.

Do we believe it? said...

OP is now a lawyer, LOL.
It would be rather ironic though. Lawyers are at the top of the list of maligned, despised and joked about professions.

Bethany said...

Anything is possible! I hope this is all a lie because it's sad no matter how you slice it.

Lawyers are often the butt of jokes, but they also are respected, some people's jaws drop when you tell them your a lawyer. OP seems to have a desperate need for respect, attention, and approval.

Maybe the law wouldn't define it as abuse but I find your actions emotionally abusive and negligent.

Did you even think how those poor children felt to have their nanny suddenly turn on them?

Dr. Juris said...

Maybe this person is a lawyer, but if she is relatively new to her position, there is no way in HELL she's making 250K. Actually, most lawyers don't make that until they've been doing it for 20 years. And if she is somehow making six digits (which I highly doubt she is), she certainly wouldn't have time to stalk ISYN, since the jobs that allow that type of salary require 100+ working hours per week. Nice try, OP.

Susannah said...

Actually OP being a lawyer would make sense. She's probably a defense attorney lack of conscience and all that.


Perhaps, we should treat her as she treated the child in this post and a child having a tanturm or using naughty words and ignore her.

I'll start.

Miss Mannah, are your pursuing an advanced degree? I've thought of returning to school for a master's in early ed.

Susannah said...

No offense to the actual lawyers here. Just a small joke.

OP said...

Dr, J-- from a top 20 school and with an LLM, you'd be surprised! I don't really have a reason to lie about my salary. At 100-- which is the starting salary for most new grads from even mediocre schools, in the privaye sector-- I'd still be triple that of most nannies. I'm approaching mt fourth year now at a NYC firm.

I used to come here rather frequently and then obviously had no reason to. I did see the cow mom a couple of weekends ago and her new baby- he's ugly, but the one I nannied for wasn't-- it reminded me of the whole thing. Do I care if you believe me? Nope. Just thought it was an interesting topic.

grow up everyone said...

Come on seriously- how absurd is this all. People bullying others and making lame blows at one another on a blog. This goes for everyone, including the poster, keep it classy guys.

Nanny E said...

I said this earlier, but I think it's pretty shitty that you call a baby ugly. I mean, it's a baby! How petty and low could you get? I get that your feelings were hurt, but you really need to let it go, especially since it was so long ago.

embarrassed now for OP said...

I think some babies are super ugly. Some toddlers, and some school age children too. Some kids are freaking ugly. I once took care of a child who was super ugly.

As for OP being a lawyer, well. lmfao. That's pretty funny. I was on her side until she said that.

Come on. lmfao.

I'm a mermaid. Did I tell you guys that? lmfao no wait, I'm the President.

Pittsburgh mother said...

Dear OP,

You lack empathy, have an exaggerated sense of self-importance. Classic narcissist. Who cares what your profession is? You're clearly not a worthy human being.

MissMannah said...

Susannah...no, I'm getting my associate's in ECE. Embarrassing, right? I'm almost 30 and only have just now gotten around to going to college. Let's just say I was a dumb kid and thought I had better things to do back when all my classmates were attending college the first time around. You ought to go back for your master's though. If you want a lifelong career in education, it makes sense to get as much schooling as possible.

Dr. Juris said...

You'd be shocked at how terrible some lawyers' grammatical skills and punctuation skills can be. Although I'm not a lawyer yet, I take a lot of pride in my writing (although I don't profess to never make mistakes). I honestly don't believe the OP is a lawyer, but if she is, I cringe at how she obviously believes that making more money than someone else somehow makes her superior to him/her.

Aries said...

OP came on here to let you guys know. Yes you may not like what she said but it's true and if you take out all the comments of people bashing OP you will see other posters who say they've distanced thereself from the children as well. I think OP is brave for admitting it and i'm sure most of you have let a child cry it out etc so stop being hypocrites. Your holier then thou additudes don't mean jack on here.

OP - I appreciate your honestly. You're completely right and i'm not one of those people on here who are constant complainers of wrong-doing. I look at reality and i like seeing honest posts from people like you on here. And alot of the comments are from people who literally stalk these boards looking to pick fights so your better off just letting them talk to themselfs although it is very amusing at times. That's why i'm here LOL but i bet the reason why alot of the 'regulars' on this site are here because they want to make sure noone posts a nanny sighting of them doing wrong so they have to stay updated and constantly pile threw the pages reading posts. SMH.

Aries said...

I can see what a poster said about nannies/babysitters being looked down upon. I mean if you're younger or older (as in retired) then thats different because people can assume you're a nanny at the moment until you get a real career or if you are older people can assume you've had your real career and now that you're retired you're nannying to keep yourself busy.

SMART parents will befriend and treat a nanny as if they're there 'family' because they know that the nanny is caring for there child. A ignorant foolish parent would easily make fun and talk crap about there nanny and forget to erase the message and accidently leave the phone in eyes sight of the nanny.

To the comment that mentioned why OP didn't step up to the parent and took it out on the kid well i would assume OP had bills to pay at the time. Why would she just quit? And MANY parents let there kids cry it out a few extra minutes in the crib, OP is saying that after finding out what was said about her she stooped running to the childs beckoncall. Neglect is completely different. She cared for the child, just didn't immediately stop what she was doing everytime the baby cried. Don't like it, oh well, i'm sure OP's feelings aren't hurt i mean c'mon it's the internet, you nannies don't actually think your comments effect OP do you? LOL

double standard said...

I have noticed that some OPs get bashed and some get protected.

Ops who do not pay their taxes get protected and coddled. OPs who are honest about life get flamed.

OP, if you said you don't pay taxes, everyone here would probably love you.

Bethany said...

What's real and honest about life about taking your anger out on a baby? Should we have coddled OP for having had her feelings hurt and offered congrats &7 a thumbs up for taking her frustrations out on a baby?

I'm not sure what posts you've read but I assure you plenty of posters get blasted for not paying their taxes.

educatednanny said...

I understand where you are coming from. While I studied for my B.A. in English I nannied for at least 10 families in 4 years in a very wealthy, cosmopolitan environment. Many of the mothers were kind and very pleasant to be around. On the other hand, I witnessed an angry mental breakdown of a mother, one mom actually threw a bottle of milk at my head and several others would snap at me for this, that and everything else and in between. By graduate school, I knew better than to allow my employers to treat me poorly. While I am ashamed I allowed some of the people I nannied for to treat me poorly, I've become much wiser in many regards. I nannied for many years and even after I taught preschool and elementary school. Today I work in as a private teacher and couldn't dream of a better job nor could I fathom the abuse I allowed as a young woman in this field.