Music Class on UWS, NY - Griffin

bad nanny sighting I'm hoping this will somehow be seen by the parents of Griffin, who looks to be about 2 years old and who takes a music class on the Upper West Side (New York City) on Friday mornings. He has a Maclaren Techo XT stroller. The woman I presume to be his nanny sleeps through every class. Not just closes her eyes, but literally sleeps. When she IS awake, after class, she is cold to him (maybe because she's just woken up). No, she isn't causing him direct harm, but the situation saddens me because Griffin is too young to communicate this to his parents or to know why she's not responding to his attempts to communicate. Please post here if you think you know this child.


Just My Two Cents Just Now said...

While I think it is wrong to sleep when caring for a small child (unless the child is napping himself), if the boy is in a class and being properly supervised by other adults, then I think it is okay for the nanny to shut her eyes for a brief period and take a rest. Zzzz...
However, the fact that she seems cross to the boy when she wakes up makes me sad. Poor boy. I hope someone who knows this boy or his family reads this and posts on here that they will tell his parents. I'll keep my fingers crossed.

are you kidding me? said...

Just my two cents- I cannot believe you think this is OK. Were you being sarcastic. A music class with a 2 yo is supposed to INVOLVE the parent or caregiver. It's not an opportunity for someone to take a nap and leave the supervision of the child up to the others in the class. If this were me, I'd see if the person running the class could help me contact the parents. What a lazy nanny. If she were mine, I'd fire her.

another nanny said...

OP, I agree with the previous poster- since this is a structured event, it should be easier to alert the parents. Ask a staff member to contact the parents directly, or ask if they could deliver a message for you, and then leave a note with them. If the nanny will fall asleep in a room full of singing children, she probably falls asleep other times as well.

Nanny L said...

I think that this is completely inappropriate, whether the child is supervised in a class or not. As a nanny, there have been times when I have been tempted to close my eyes for a few minutes when the kids are napping.. the house is so quiet.. but I don't. And the reason I don't, is because I AM AT WORK. You should not be napping at work! You are getting paid, you are on the clock!!! I highly doubt any boss would be happy with their employee taking a nap at work. And she is in a public place! Come on!

Manhattan Nanny said...

I have done a ton of different music classes for this age group, and they all require participation by accompanying adults. It drags the atmosphere of the class down for everyone if there is one person who is not joining in with enthusiasm. I can't imagine someone sleeping!
I hope someone contacts the parents. This nanny's lack of involvement with the child is sad, and will certainly affect him.

Just My Two Cents Just Now said...

Ooops..I am sorry. Honestly in all of my years working as a Nanny, I have never attended a music class for kiddos. I was thinking more along the lines of dropping a child off at a class, then waiting outside.
I stand corrected.
As for napping on the job, I believe if a Nanny is working a long shift, say 10 hrs and her charge takes a nap, it is okay for her to take a nap as well as long as she is right next to the child. Parents do it all the time, why shouldn't the Nanny?? I know, I know, it's because the Nanny is being PAID to watch the child, while the parent is not. However, to prevent Nanny burnout, a 1/2 hr catnap is a great idea to me. The Nanny profession is unique in that there are no periodic 15 min breaks throughout the shift nor a dedicated lunch break. Sure, one can grab a sandwich while their charge is eating too...but trust me, it's not the same as being able to pick up a sandwich at the local Subway and eat it on a park bench while you catch up on phone calls, e-mail, etc. Also, when you get a dedicated lunch break in most jobs, you get to have lunch with your co-workers and de-stress.
If I had a Nanny who was working a long shift, I would be very concerned w/Nanny burnout. I want my child to have optimal care and love, and if the Nanny is to be working, working, working for 10 hrs straight w/no break whatsoever, I cringe to think how well she can care for my child.
For the record, when I work full-time, my bosses have always let me nap with my charge. The only stipulation is that I nap either next to the baby monitor or the child.
C'mon folks...us Nannies are human beings..not some robots. We need to refresh ourselves from time to time in order to do our best jobs.

TC said...

As long as my charges are napping I am allowed to nap. My boss has told me that many times and there have been times I've dozed while the kids nap. I always have the monitor right by me and I sleep on the couch in the family/play room up stairs just a few feet away from the kids.

I had mono once and was dead on my feet for about 6 weeks, I used nap time to sleep and it helped me get through the last few hours of the day. When I have to work till midnight some nights and then drive the 30 minutes home and be up and back to work at 8am the next morning a nap the next day helps wonderfully. When I go to the Rodeo and don't come home till 1 or 2 in the morning and have to be up at 7am the next morning, again a nap helps me get through the day.

As long as the boss approves there is no reason not to

Now in this instance the nanny shouldn't be sleeping, her job at that moment is to interact with the child not sleep.

ATL Nanny said...

I agree with the others who suggested contacting the teacher or someone else at the music studio. This is completely unacceptable and there should be a fairly easy way to alert the parents.

As for napping on the job (while the child is sleeping, not in public, etc) -- I have been a nanny for over a decade and all my employers have been fine with this. But aside from a time or two when I was really ill and unable to take a sick day, I've never taken them up on the offer. It just feels weird and unnecessary to me to sleep at work.

NJnannyC said...

I am a nanny in NJ, and it drives me INSANE when I am in our music together class or connection in Summit class or our gymboree class, and I see these nannies who are on their phones, or taking a nap,..I just don't understand!! I get taking a small snooze when the kids are napping themselves..but why would you ever nap or chat on your phone for a long period of time out in public?? I SO wish I knew this toddlers parents because let me tell you how Fast that nanny would be fired!! SHAME ON HER!

Bostonnanny said...

I f@&$ing hate being in a class with nannies or even mothers who don't watch their kids. A 2 year olds needs to watched 24/7 and it's not the responsibility of other nannies and parents or even the teacher to keep them from misbehaving and getting hurt.
I am not paid to watch their kid while they sit in a corner and sleep or talk. If you can't multitask and don't sleep at night then don't freaking work children.

In regards to napping while the children nap, that is the parents decision. I like my cat naps :)

Bostonnanny said...

I f@&$ing hate being in a class with nannies or even mothers who don't watch their kids. A 2 year olds needs to watched 24/7 and it's not the responsibility of other nannies and parents or even the teacher to keep them from misbehaving and getting hurt.
I am not paid to watch their kid while they sit in a corner and sleep or talk. If you can't multitask and don't sleep at night then don't freaking work children.

In regards to napping while the children nap, that is the parents decision. I like my cat naps :)

Nanny L said...

I think it is a crying shame that all you nannies on here feel it is okay to nap on the job. It is A JOB and you are on the clock, being paid for working. Why should you use that time and sleep? Sleep at home the night before. Sheesh. Use naptime for doing light housekeeping chores for the family. I don't believe anyone who claims their bosses are okay with them sleeping on the job while they are getting paid. That sounds pretty bogus to me.

lmurph said...

Okay... so don't believe it, but every family I have ever worked for, with the exception of one or two babysitting jobs back when I was in school, has told me - and I didn't ask and would not have thought of it myself - that I am absolutely welcome to sleep while the kids are sleeping. The way my current MB put it "I (mom) usually needed one by the afternoon, so go ahead - the girls will make themselves heard when they wake up." It's not like I decide "you know what, I'll have a nap instead of doing the dishes or sweeping," but if I'm on top of the housekeeping and would just be reading anyway, then I see absolutely nothing wrong with dozing instead.

a nanny said...

Nanny L:

Not all of us think that. Read ALL the posts.

TC said...

Nanny L why would I sit here and lie on a website? Why would I say my boss told me I could take a nap if that wasn't the case? What would I gain by saying I could nap if I truly couldn't?

Tales from the (Nanny)Hood said...

Nanny L., my employers have all given me permission to cat-nap as well, since they know I wouldn't take that opportunity unless all the housework that needed doing was done. I guess they are aware that caring for little kids can be exhausting, and they don't begrudge me the chance to recharge with a 20 minute snooze during my 11 hour work day so that I can continue to do a fabulous job the rest of the day.

I guess they could insist that I prowl the house searching for things to do to look busy, but they don't.

TC said...

Tales that's how I am. I've got some 'chores' that need to be done, and I do them after the kiddo(s) lays down for a nap but I'm not going to sit by the washer waiting for the clothes so I can throw them in the dryer or sit next to the dishwasher waiting for the dishes to be done.

My jobs are fairly easy, I clean up the toys, mail, counters along with the clothes and dishes. Since I do at least one load of laundry a day and one load of dishes there isn't a huge pile of stuff to do and that leaves me a good deal of time with nothing to do.

When the oldest is in school it's just me and the baby and most days he takes a 4 hour nap, there is only so much cleaning and tv watching you can do. They have a maid that comes once a week...so what exactly do some of the people here expect me to do? Scrub the garage floor? Give the dog a bath? Mow the grass? Weed eat? Clean up the cat barf? There just simply isn't enough for me to do so I take a nap when I'm tired. Most days I channel and web surf, I take a nap probably once a month.

I do all the odds and end jobs like changing light bulbs, putting together the kids toys, putting together the shelves for the kids rooms, organizing the kids closests and toys....what else am I supposed to do during my down time?

The first Nanny L said...

Ok so I am the original poster that used the moniker "Nanny L" I did not post the second one. Please do not use the same moniker on the same post! I don't know if that was an accident or what but please find another moniker!!

Jacqui said...

I think taking a nap on the job is much easier when you are working by yourself. I have had jobs where the parent or parents telecommute (work from home) and I could NEVER nap when they were home. It was just too weird.
I think it is perfectly acceptable to nap as long as you are near the child and the dishes are done and the toys are picked up. I would feel weird if the parents came home and I was under a blanket snoozing in their home. However, if it was during the day, I would take full advantage of it.
Nanny L...whoever you are, why are you denying what you previously wrote just because many people on here disagree? You said it yourself that you don't approve of napping on the job. Remember? Now you are claiming someone else stole your moniker???!

the first Nanny L said...

I'm not "claiming" someone used my moniker because I am worried that the second post offended people. I logged on to comment again and saw someone is using my moniker, and I was annoyed. It is hard to participate in a post when someone is using the same moniker as you. I don't care if someone uses "Nanny L" on a different forum, but on this one it made everything confusing.

In my original post, I did say that I thought nannies shouldn't nap because they are on the clock. After reading some of the other posts, my mind has changed a little bit. I think it really depends on the agreement that you have with your boss. I have a great relationship with my MB and DB, and I am sure they would let me... I guess I am just held back by that fear that I am doing something wrong by taking a nap. Hearing that other nannies do nap, and the reasons why, it makes sense if you have all of your chores done and you have the monitor on or near you.

MissMannah said...

In my last nanny job, my only "chores" were doing the dishes, making sure all the toys were put up and occasionally throwing on a load of laundry. My boss specifically said she didn't want me doing any more housekeeping and naturally I obliged! I worked 12 hour days and my charge took 2 or 3 hour naps everyday and yes, I took one also. His bedroom opened up into the family room so I had a good view of his bed from the couch. And I'm a very light sleeper besides. My boss had absolutely no problem with this because she said when he's asleep, it is "my time."

barbaraiscrazy said...

I was in a dance class at two years old and NO my parents were not dancing with me.

I do think its okay for this nanny to REST her eyes for a LITTLE bit, actually falling asleep IS WRONG.

either way, whether she falls asleep or not, she is mean to the child after and that should be addressed

Just My Two Cents Just Now said...

Miss Mannah, I think it is great that your bosses say when the child is asleep, it is YOUR time, esp. since you were working a 12-hr shift. I would say in 99.99% of the time when I am working, once the child goes to sleep, then I have a laundry list of chores to do since I am technically "on the clock." I have bottles/dishes to wash, toys to wipe down, laundry to wash/dry/fold/put away, a floor to vacuum/sweep, etc. Then by the time the child awakes, I am grumpy and overtired.
I think parents need to let the Nanny rest when the child rests. Mother Nature even acknowledges that whoever cares for a small child needs periodic breaks since the child usually naps during the day.
When my kids were younger, I would tell the Nannies to do whatever they wanted during naptimes.
Nanny L, I am glad you changed your mind a little. It is true that a Nanny who is allowed to nap vs. one who has to do "light household" tasks during naptime makes for a better caregiver. And all sides benefit when the Nanny is well-rested, refreshed and content in her job.
Why don't ALL families understand this??????!!!!